Since I was diagnosed with an illness, I have been unable to have sex. My wife loves sex and misses it terribly yet even though I have told I don't mind her finding sex with some one else, she won't as she doesn't want to be "unfaithful ".
Any ideas on how to convince her it would be Ok, she cries herself asleep most nights missing it.
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My wife needs sex but I am incapable
What do you mean by "sex"?
Sex isn't just intercourse - many disabled people adapt and express their sexuality in a creative way.
It must be very difficult for you both,yes,no denying that - but it isn't the end of your affection and the pleasure of intimacy together is it?
Only a partial analogy as the plot entails an extreme turn of events in the context of the repressive culture of a small Scottish island but what you suggest is not unlike the situation in the tragic storyline of the movie "Breaking the Waves" starring Emily Watson.
Sex isn't just intercourse - many disabled people adapt and express their sexuality in a creative way.
It must be very difficult for you both,yes,no denying that - but it isn't the end of your affection and the pleasure of intimacy together is it?
Only a partial analogy as the plot entails an extreme turn of events in the context of the repressive culture of a small Scottish island but what you suggest is not unlike the situation in the tragic storyline of the movie "Breaking the Waves" starring Emily Watson.
Must be tough and you have my sympathy. Have you suggested a 3sum? i dont know the details of your illness but perhaps you can still take part and provide her with the re-assurance she needs? You can give her the love and emotional element..(and perhaps oral?) and another man (or woman) can provide the rest of her needs.
Warming the Bed
sorry you're not so well!Try to concentrate on what you can do and not what you can' is mostly mental if your wife is crying herself to sleep Plenty of options -- could she not bring herself to orgasm while you hug her and talk dirty --- or let you watchher or buy some toys you could use on her.---always the option of 3 some with understanding male to act at your instruction,but you must find solution together-----close!!! Please,Please don't let her cry____she needs your support and love too!
Orgasminator
Quote by keefy
Since I was diagnosed with an illness, I have been unable to have sex. My wife loves sex and misses it terribly yet even though I have told I don't mind her finding sex with some one else, she won't as she doesn't want to be "unfaithful ".
Any ideas on how to convince her it would be Ok, she cries herself asleep most nights missing it.
Hello Keefy,
I would suggest the first thing you do is go and see your local GP and find out exactly what, the effects of your illness are. Is impotence one of the things that is the result of this illness?
It could well be that he may be able to offer something that can assist you, or perhaps refer you to a specialist. I know the NHS is running slowly, having had recent medical problems myself. However, doing nothing to help solve your problem isn't going to take you anywhere at all.
It may be possible that whatever you have is causing psycological problems, who knows unless you see your doctor.
Being disgnosed as having a nasty/ debilitating / long term medical problem, is no fun at all, as I well know from recent personal experience, and it can be a hell of a shock to your system.
Get on the phone, after you have read this 'post' and get an appointment with your GP today. Hopefully you will make a full recovery. If you get your 'Wedding Tackle' back into operating condition, Great. If not, then look around for possible alternatives to keep your wife happy.
NOW GET ON THE BLOODY PHONE.
Harry0
Casanova and Drunk of this Parish.
This might not be the most popular thing to say round here, but Swinging isn't for everyone. If your wife would rather cry herself to sleep than be 'unfaithful', then either she's just not the sort of person who wants this lifestyle, or she's not missing 'sex', or she's missing sex with you and a subsitute won't do.
Maybe she's worried that if it's ok for her to look elsewhere then you will do the same when you are better? Maybe she's worried she'll fall in love with the other man... there are a million reasons not to swing, which is why most people don't do it.
I don't know how you work this one out, but I'm not convinced that finding her a temporary partner is the answer.
I don't know the extent of your illness either, but with hands, a tongue, and the link on the left titled 'Sex Toys', you should be able to work out some way to satisfy her immediate needs without involving a third party.
Maybe she's worried that if it's ok for her to look elsewhere then you will do the same when you are better? Maybe she's worried she'll fall in love with the other man... there are a million reasons not to swing, which is why most people don't do it.
I don't know how you work this one out, but I'm not convinced that finding her a temporary partner is the answer.
I don't know the extent of your illness either, but with hands, a tongue, and the link on the left titled 'Sex Toys', you should be able to work out some way to satisfy her immediate needs without involving a third party.
It is vey difficult to offer advice without understanding the nature of your illness.
If it is life threatening I suggest her crying herself to sleep is probably due to the that. If on the other hand its chicken pox or something that will be cured a temporary swinging arrangement is probably not the answer
If it is life threatening I suggest her crying herself to sleep is probably due to the that. If on the other hand its chicken pox or something that will be cured a temporary swinging arrangement is probably not the answer
Mod
Quote by keefy
Since I was diagnosed with an illness, I have been unable to have sex. My wife loves sex and misses it terribly yet even though I have told I don't mind her finding sex with some one else, she won't as she doesn't want to be "unfaithful ".
Any ideas on how to convince her it would be Ok, she cries herself asleep most nights missing it.
I have to say, Keefy, that this does sound a bit like a wind up. You haven't really given a lot of background info to your situation, which has left people thrashing around in the dark to provide a possible solution.
I would suggest that either you provide more info, seek medical attention and/or counselling. I can't believe that you have come on a swingers Site and with your very first post, ask how to convince your wife to have sex with someone else. Who knows your wife better than you?
Mal
I must be honest, I also thought this was a load of BS, which is why I had not replied, till now.
Knowing quite a bit about long term, debilitating, illness - I think this is a harsh kinda 'joke' and was thinking I'd not contribute, so as not to start an arguement... but as others have said it already... wouldn't be my fault if it did, now, would it?
So... tell us more about this and let us know you mean it, Keefy, or shut up and piss off.
Knowing quite a bit about long term, debilitating, illness - I think this is a harsh kinda 'joke' and was thinking I'd not contribute, so as not to start an arguement... but as others have said it already... wouldn't be my fault if it did, now, would it?
So... tell us more about this and let us know you mean it, Keefy, or shut up and piss off.
I wasn't 100% about it but thought well lets give him the benefit of the doubt but posts like Vix's have made me distasteful if peoples suspicions are hopes he will come back to prove them wrong but the longer he leaves it the less good it looks.A genuine person in this situation would surely follow their thread avidly and be quick to respond - were I to put something this serious up and be accused of lying I'd be straight back on here to deny that and would be PMing or e-mailing my accusers to assure them that was not the case.
Mod
Give him a chance - he only put it on 9 hours ago!! Believe it or not, he may not have access to the site during the day!!
Mal
Mal
I think it's usually worth putting in a serious and considered reply to posts even if they are wind-ups (btw, I'm not suggesting that this one is!).
The archive of this board is a great resource for newbies to browse, and like all sites, there are more non-contributors reading than people who actually post, so leaving some good advice in the archive is a good thing even if it's not useful to the person who made the original post.
The archive of this board is a great resource for newbies to browse, and like all sites, there are more non-contributors reading than people who actually post, so leaving some good advice in the archive is a good thing even if it's not useful to the person who made the original post.
Sex God
Quote by WaterpistolThat sounds like bullshit - if she had any compassion she wouldn't be laying her shit on you just because you are ill thats a bit fucking harsh man have some compassion. shit and you supposed to be able to come on here and get things off your chest
she cries herself asleep most nights missing it.
