Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login

new couple looking for advice

last reply
6 replies
1.2k views
2 watchers
0 likes
Hello, This may be a bit of a tall order but if anyone can give us some advice we would be grateful. we are a couple in our mid 20`s 24f/25m and we are fairly new to the scene. We have experienced a little swinging abroad on holiday (couples only) but never dared try at home. Funny how you don't care away on holiday but suddenly it seems more dangerous at home.
My wife and I would like to try a club but feel we want to just take a look and view without doing anything first and aren't sure about the jump from two on two couple swap in the same room, to a situation where there may be quite a few people around. We don't particularly prefer older more mature couples but have found that they put us more at ease and my wife doesn't feel as intimidated with older men so somewhere that has a more mature clientele is really what we are looking for, not to old mind you, but not so many younger people there. Can anyone recommend somewhere that fits all our silly needs, or are we trying to be to fussy about what we want from our first visit. Also we have had conflicting advice from some people saying try a quiet night for a starters. But we have also been told its better to pick a busy couples night to start with. if it's busy we would just be part of the crowed and find it easier to mingle, anyone give advice on that ? We live in Leeds and prefer to travel well out of our area so nowhere near Leeds please. I should also say we are not on here trying to arrange a meet with anyone or exchange pictures and web cameras. We are on here looking for help and advice so please don't contacts us for anything else other than that you would only be wasting your time your not gonna get our pictures and we arn`t going to meet you, if you are genuine you will understand what your early days were like. If we want to meet people we go to places to meet them not arrange things over the net. My wife prefers to see people in the flesh before she decides, pictures mean nothing. If she feels comfy she'll do almost anything (dirty cow) but if everything isn't just right wild horses wouldn't get her to do anything. Maybe in time we'll be dogging and shagging allcummers (lol) in group gang bangs but at the moment we need advice on how to get over the initial barrier of feeling excited but scared. And ill be honest and say it's not just the wife, we need help on getting through the door for starters, our fantasies are great and we would like to try lots of things but fantasy and reality are completely different things. Genuine help would be gratefully received sorry to sound like a couple of wimps if we have come to the wrong place and you are to advanced for us just say.
Thanks anyway
Mick & Alison
Hi Mick & Ali.
My partner & I dont actively swing at the moment, but were in the same situatuion as you and at a similar age about 5 years ago.
I would agree with the busy night argument. On a quiet night you feel very self conscious and it can be difficult to get going. Make sure you pick a couples only night too, otherwise the guys will be all over her (unless that's what she wants)
2 on 2 in a room can be quite intense, try a communal area. Easier to move away if it gets heavy. Be prepared to be touched a lot (especially her) gentle touching is the common way of getting 'permission' to carry on.
Oral sex / touching is most common. many couples dont have full sex with others. Girl on girl stuff is very common too, most girls on the scene are into it, but again it's easy to move away from if she's not interested.
Finally, Manchester has plenty of clubs. Close enough for a night out, but out of your territory.
Have fun
Steve
Hi there steve, thanks for the reply, we ain`t the shrinking violets we sound everything you say is what we expect and are hoping will happen actually, it's just finding the right place and atmosphere for the first visit to a club, nothing worse than falling at the first fence. I'm sure having a good night on our first attempt will spur us on to go again, but I have a feeling if it turns out a disaster we are liable to stick to private visits with couples only.
What do you think about finding another couple to go with ? Do you find many couples go together ?. Still have no info on a place with a more mature clientele mind you, lots of conflicting reports in the reviews section. Still looking, anyone suggest a good Manchester based club then and a night that's good ? Greedy girls night sounds great but not just yet eh ? By the way why not a greedy boys night ?(lol)
And just to add to the never ending info we seem to be asking for (sorry) we have been recommend a bed & breakfast worth a visit in Blackpool, we know the name so not after that but any info on weather its worth a visit ? It actually sounds a better idea to meet others for starters
Hi:
Another couple is a very good idea, safety in numbers and all that. Of course you have to find another couple, one of the best places being a club!! Chicken & Egg....
In Manchester, Xanadu certainly used to be good, a bit tired nowerdays. Never been to Cupids, but all of the reports sound good.
The most common 'failure' of a night by the way (for us) was nothing happening so we left disappointed. NEVER had a 'bad' experience.
Hi
Stevie and others - Cupids is a good club, not fantastic, but certainly up there so to speak. I'm quite a regular there, and have seen the ups and downs (ooohhh errrr! :shock: ) of the place. I would recommend it to beginners, it's friendly, relaxed and most folks are respectful etc etc.
If you read the reviews of Cupids on the clubs and parties page you will see quite a debate going on at the mo about the pros and cons of the place! The upshot is, if you're a couple it's worth a visit.
You're dead right though - sometimes, at whatever club you go to, not a lot happens, and that's dissappointing. That's why sites like this are good so that people can arrange to meet up at clubs - to ensure the fun!
Anyway, that was just a comment really - have fun!
Michelle
Hi guys, this has nothing to do with your situation, and i'm sorry Linda and i can not help you.
We have always wanted to try what you are trying to do but we are only happy meeting up with single guys, "i'm stra8, pheww, before you ask, lol.
We just had to say that we think you two are so level headed to go about this the way you are doing, "our hats goe off to you both" we wish you all the luck in the world.
Mark and Linda, "have a gander at our pix if you like" :twisted:
Bottom left as you look at the screen.
Used to be top bottom left, "i think", but we will not go into that will we MARK, lol wink
If you want to travel well out of your area, you could try Xtasia in West Bromwich on a Saturday night (couples only) The ages range right across the board and the main room is a disco, so you don't have to strip down to a towel as soon as you walk through the door. There are two main play areas off the disco where you can join in if you want, but there is no pressure to do anything if you don't want to. There is also a sauna/jacuzzi area with more playrooms if you prefer that atmosphere. I used to work there, so I know that the staff are very good at putting first-timers at their ease. The Days Inn Hotel (used to be called the Howard Johnson) next door offers a discount if you mention the club when booking. Check out the club's website and see what you think. Good luck.