Having been through a lot of the threads on this site I have noticed a theme running through a lot of them. There is a lot of slagging off of newbies and single guys. I am a newbie to this site (although I did use the old one extensively) but not a newbie to meeting others for social sex. So is the anti-newbie against new swingers or new people to this site? Given the amount of ads that do say single guys welcome or are being sought I just wondered. Are single guys really gonna feel welcome or feel they are taken seriously with such open bias? I know a lot of guys will be here for a wind up, I am one that is very serious about my nocturnal activities lol. I am very respectful and accept all limits and am never pushy. I am clean and discreet and never judgemental, if I do not want to take part in certain activities I have always found a polite NO does the trick.
I know the single guy thing is probably due to the sheer number of guys out there who might be "trying their luck" or just taking the piss, most of whom are probably too young to use this site anyway. I know there are probably lots of people who have been let down in the past by single guys either doing it for a wind -up or losing their bottle.
That ladies and couples is not me. If I can't make a pre arranged meet for whatever reason (usually work) I will call and make my apologies hopefully in good time and try and arrange another suitable time. I know sometimes this has been construed as time wasting but I am a genuine guy looking for genuine meets so please do not tar all "newbies" or single guys as the same.
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
Newbies/Single guys.
last reply
14 replies
772 views
0 watchers
0 likes
Hiya 
Nice to see you in The Cafe.
A lot of the negative comments are aimed at some of the single guys - yes the quick shag brigade do some stupid things and it annoys the crap out of people, but there are also some fabulous single guys on this site.
What's more I once started a thread to raise some positive comments about single guys:
Here
Nice to see you in The Cafe.
A lot of the negative comments are aimed at some of the single guys - yes the quick shag brigade do some stupid things and it annoys the crap out of people, but there are also some fabulous single guys on this site.
What's more I once started a thread to raise some positive comments about single guys:
Here
Quote by needaridenow
Yeah I seen that one. But still a lot of others made cooments that where shall we say not positive. I know a lot of guys are ruining it for us genuine blokes but how do you get to convince peole you are straight up? Any advice would be great ta. ;-)
best way is to get know ..... forums/chatrooms, socials/munches
That way we get to see you as a personality rather than just words on a page (well ok forums/chatrooms are) but the real you shines through and people appreciate that more
Cx
What she said 
When I joined this site as a single female, it really used to cheese me off getting 1 line spam pms complete with cock shots, but the guys I've met socially or chatted to on the forums are great.
For that reason I've never put an ad on SH and I only ever met up with people I'd met at the SH social functions or who I've chatted to on the forums.
When I joined this site as a single female, it really used to cheese me off getting 1 line spam pms complete with cock shots, but the guys I've met socially or chatted to on the forums are great.
For that reason I've never put an ad on SH and I only ever met up with people I'd met at the SH social functions or who I've chatted to on the forums.
Quote by needaridenow
. . . but how do you get to convince peole you are straight up? Any advice would be great ta. ;-)
Put in the time and effort needed to become known for whoand whatyou are; here in cyberspace, and/or at any meets/parties/socials/Munches and the such like.
Above all - be yourself :thumbup:
Quote by needaridenow
I am a newbie to this site (although I did use the old one extensively) but
As a matter of interest; which old site do you mean ?
Are you an old member that's re-registered ?
Quote by needaridenow
Having been through a lot of the threads on this site I have noticed a theme running through a lot of them. There is a lot of slagging off of newbies and single guys. I am a newbie to this site (although I did use the old one extensively) but not a newbie to meeting others for social sex. So is the anti-newbie against new swingers or new people to this site? Given the amount of ads that do say single guys welcome or are being sought I just wondered. Are single guys really gonna feel welcome or feel they are taken seriously with such open bias? I know a lot of guys will be here for a wind up, I am one that is very serious about my nocturnal activities lol. I am very respectful and accept all limits and am never pushy. I am clean and discreet and never judgemental, if I do not want to take part in certain activities I have always found a polite NO does the trick.
I know the single guy thing is probably due to the sheer number of guys out there who might be "trying their luck" or just taking the piss, most of whom are probably too young to use this site anyway. I know there are probably lots of people who have been let down in the past by single guys either doing it for a wind -up or losing their bottle.
That ladies and couples is not me. If I can't make a pre arranged meet for whatever reason (usually work) I will call and make my apologies hopefully in good time and try and arrange another suitable time. I know sometimes this has been construed as time wasting but I am a genuine guy looking for genuine meets so please do not tar all "newbies" or single guys as the same.
would you care to explain which threads you have seen these.....because i don't know of any threads where they are slagging off newbies.....
Hi and welcome to the Cafe.
As I've seen it here, we never slag off newbies. In fact I've only ever seen them welcomed into the fold, warned about the mad ones
but welcomed all the same. The majority of single guys on here are great, it's just the muppets that get everyone's backs up. 
Hope you enjoy it here and have fun !
As I've seen it here, we never slag off newbies. In fact I've only ever seen them welcomed into the fold, warned about the mad ones
but welcomed all the same. The majority of single guys on here are great, it's just the muppets that get everyone's backs up. Hope you enjoy it here and have fun !
Not full threads slagging off newbies more comments that are part of other posts that are shall we say less than positive again maybe to do with single guys. I have no doubt newbies are welcomed if single females or couples. But straight single guys I feel are viewed with suspicion and given a wide berth.
Don't get me wrong I fully understand why this is the case. As you say a lot of single guys are muppets who are in no way even remotely genuine and only on "for a laugh". And if they are invited and fail to show I can quite see why single guys have had a rough time. So I will take your advice and hang around the caff for a while and see what happens.
BTW any Scottish women in here by any chance. ;-)
Don't get me wrong I fully understand why this is the case. As you say a lot of single guys are muppets who are in no way even remotely genuine and only on "for a laugh". And if they are invited and fail to show I can quite see why single guys have had a rough time. So I will take your advice and hang around the caff for a while and see what happens.
BTW any Scottish women in here by any chance. ;-)
Hunni, it depends on who the comments are aimed at. We're all up for a laugh in here and sometimes say things to the regular single guys that might shock newbies when they read it but it's just banter ( me and meaty are like that all the time but I know he loves me really ) We also like a good debate, though it does tend to be hijacked by page 2 !
Please don;t be put off by us. We're safe really...........well, some of us are, the rest are all
) We also like a good debate, though it does tend to be hijacked by page 2 ! Please don;t be put off by us. We're safe really...........well, some of us are, the rest are all
As my partner has decided swinging is not after all for her.I have changed my account from a couple status to that of single male with her important that as honesty has & always will be one of the bedrocks of our relationship.I will still be going to clubs and on here.
The thing is it feels wierd as an SH single,& kind of like being a newbie
Guess i'll get used to it.
cc_7up
The thing is it feels wierd as an SH single,& kind of like being a newbie
Guess i'll get used to it.
cc_7up
Its not so much the Newbies as we have all been newbies but there has been a bit of a rush i would say of single blokes joining the site who think of SH as shagging heaven and not Swinging Heaven (misunderstanding what its about) thus making it difficult for the decent ones to get through them.
Sex God
Quote by goose35
Its not so much the Newbies as we have all been newbies but there has been a bit of a rush i would say of single blokes joining the site who think of SH as shagging heaven and not Swinging Heaven (misunderstanding what its about).
Someone please give this guy a medal :thumbup: spot on!
Quote by goose35
thus making it difficult for the decent ones to get through them.
Im not actually disagreeing with you here, but what I would say it that the decent guys will get through, it just takes time to get known and trusted.
Whether it is single males, single females, couples - same or oposite sex - then together they all make this site what it is and I do feel they are always welcomed. I honestly dont think that anyone on here has a go at people just because they are a newbie or because they are a single. Some do have a go because the person concerned just may warrant it, or perhaps they are trying to get accross the point that Goose made above about it not being 'Shagging Heaven' but on the whole, I can honestly say that I feel that new members, male, female or anywhere inbetween are always made welcome
