Hi there,sorry if this is not in the spirit of the board,but how does one cope when told by your wife she doesn't love you anymore and wants a divorce?
I feel lousy
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Not a nice day for me
Sex God
Quote by lambchop
Hi there,sorry if this is not in the spirit of the board,but how does one cope when told by your wife she doesn't love you anymore and wants a divorce?
I feel lousy
I suggest you find time and sit and talk to her and both of you be open and honest about what you both want.
Quote by Sarah
Hi there,sorry if this is not in the spirit of the board,but how does one cope when told by your wife she doesn't love you anymore and wants a divorce?
I feel lousy
I suggest you find time and sit and talk to her and both of you be open and honest about what you both want.
Definitely... you both need to sit down and talk matters through.... the only people who gain from divorce are the solicitors......
Try some mediation or even try going to counselling... i.e. Relate or similar.... chat over what you both want from your relationship.... and if all else fails... be able to accept that you both want different things.... and move forwards from there...
equi-princess xxx
Have been through this myself. Keep your calm and don't start drinking or any of that because that will make matters worse.
If you can still talk civilized (both of you) then find out the reason and see if you can change anything. Marriage councelors are sometimes a good idea too.
Make sure you lissen to hear and don't interrupt even if she says something not very nice and then think about what she said before responding. Respond in a calm and even tone do not and under no circumstances get angry and start shouting because that is the point of no return and matters get lost completely.
If you can still talk civilized (both of you) then find out the reason and see if you can change anything. Marriage councelors are sometimes a good idea too.
Make sure you lissen to hear and don't interrupt even if she says something not very nice and then think about what she said before responding. Respond in a calm and even tone do not and under no circumstances get angry and start shouting because that is the point of no return and matters get lost completely.
Quote by lambchop
Hi there,sorry if this is not in the spirit of the board,but how does one cope when told by your wife she doesn't love you anymore and wants a divorce?
I feel lousy
You probably can't see this at the moment, lambchop.
But from someone with two and a half failed "marriages" behind him. (MkIII and me didn't actually marry)
If it does all come to an end, you willget back up.
You might have to "dig deep" to find the strength, but it will get easier to deal with.
After that - it's onward and upward.
I wish you bothwell, and if it gets really shitty - try to remember you are both indivuals, and remember you are both people that cared for one and other. Try not to lose sight of that if the mudslinging starts.
Hi Lamchop,
I know exactly how you feel mate having been there myself.
It will take time but it does get better. It took me 6 months to stop moping around, but I realised it wasn't so much the marriage I mourned but the fact that I had suddenly been pushed out of the comfortable life I had worked hard for. It dawned on me though that it was boredom and apathy that I was leaving behind. As people grow older they change and unfortunately if two people are not interested in changing in similar directions they tend to drift apart. I personally didn't see it coming, I was too wrapped up in doing the things I did and I found that I was settling for less and less. The marriage ending was the kickstart to the rest of my life.
My saviour was a fantastic woman that I met and spent the best part of a year with. We had some of the best sex I have ever had and we had some great times doing things together. I thought I had met the woman of my dreams but it still wasn't to be.
Now I look upon her as being the person who opened my eyes to the fact that there is a lot more to life. It was her that introduced me to the clubs and swinging scene albeit not actively. Unfortunately we were not compatible enough to sustain a longterm relationship.
At the age of 43 I still hope to find my soulmate who thinks like I do. I'm sure she is out there somewhere. But until then I just intend to enjoy being single, make a lot more friends and have a blast.
I hope that I've maybe given you something positive to think about even if there does not seem to be anything positive happening at the moment. All it takes is time.
My life quote at the moment is that as one door closes another opens.
Take care.
I know exactly how you feel mate having been there myself.
It will take time but it does get better. It took me 6 months to stop moping around, but I realised it wasn't so much the marriage I mourned but the fact that I had suddenly been pushed out of the comfortable life I had worked hard for. It dawned on me though that it was boredom and apathy that I was leaving behind. As people grow older they change and unfortunately if two people are not interested in changing in similar directions they tend to drift apart. I personally didn't see it coming, I was too wrapped up in doing the things I did and I found that I was settling for less and less. The marriage ending was the kickstart to the rest of my life.
My saviour was a fantastic woman that I met and spent the best part of a year with. We had some of the best sex I have ever had and we had some great times doing things together. I thought I had met the woman of my dreams but it still wasn't to be.
Now I look upon her as being the person who opened my eyes to the fact that there is a lot more to life. It was her that introduced me to the clubs and swinging scene albeit not actively. Unfortunately we were not compatible enough to sustain a longterm relationship.
At the age of 43 I still hope to find my soulmate who thinks like I do. I'm sure she is out there somewhere. But until then I just intend to enjoy being single, make a lot more friends and have a blast.
I hope that I've maybe given you something positive to think about even if there does not seem to be anything positive happening at the moment. All it takes is time.
My life quote at the moment is that as one door closes another opens.
Take care.
Quote by lambchop
Hi there,sorry if this is not in the spirit of the board,but how does one cope when told by your wife she doesn't love you anymore and wants a divorce?
I feel lousy
If it has finished, go out and find someone else and start again, you might even be happier. sorry to be blunt but it is the only way.
:cry: 
Sex God
Some good advice above. It is amazing what can be achieved by just sitting down together with good intent to talk rationally about what you both want - not what either of you have done wrong or not done - what you both want for the future. To make it work will be a lot of effort and if it doesn't it is pain and grief.
Do try it and good luck.
Do try it and good luck.
Like the good people who have posted just above me, all I can advise is first try and find out if BOTH partners want to try and save the marriage. If this is only one-sided, then I'm afraid it will be better to accept the ending of the marriage. If both partners are not perfectly happy, then there is little point in dragging it on.
If the ending is inevitable, then do not become bitter with each other. You will still have to make contact with each other, and if you are friendly with each other it helps you through this final stage.
If however, there is a glimmer of hope in saving it, then do whatever it takes to save it.
Marriage guidance, counselling, anything is worth a try mate.
Good luck mate, whichever way it goes.
We'll be here for you
If the ending is inevitable, then do not become bitter with each other. You will still have to make contact with each other, and if you are friendly with each other it helps you through this final stage.
If however, there is a glimmer of hope in saving it, then do whatever it takes to save it.
Marriage guidance, counselling, anything is worth a try mate.
Good luck mate, whichever way it goes.
We'll be here for you
hi hope you feel better soon happened to me once a long time ago was left holding the baby but hey in retrospect it was for the best met someone else who cared and all is fab sure you will too xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
