The guy from the Housing Association has finally turned up to replace my bath, yippeee......
My bath is in bits, the new one is sat outside on my lawn, his mate has turned up to haul the old bath away, all was good!
Until I overheard him telling his mate he`s unlikely to be able to finish the job today because his back has gone and he can hardly walk :shock: :shock: :shock: :huh:
Venusxxx /getting smellier by the minute
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Oh bugger
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Master of Sex
look on the plus side at least the baths turned up, and if his back has gone you won't have to make him a brew while he's fitting it
Why don't you DIY?
I reckon it wouldn't take you long to round up a couple of burly blokes to lift it into place.
Just standing at your bedroom window with nothing on waving at any guys you see will soon have them knocking.
Once you have lured them in, find out which ones, if any, have experience with plumbing.
The best way to find out is to bend over to the now exposed pipes in your bathroom (still naked of course) and ask the gaggle of guys "does anyone know what size pipe fits in this hole?"
The one that tells you that a "3/4 inch copper pipe, welded with a bit of flux and horse hair should do the trick" is the one that you want.
Persuade him that if he fits the bath, you will give him the show of his life and I am sure he will obligingly fit the bath for you. Once the bath is fitted, sit him in front of the TV and put on the movie "Chicago". Promise repaid.
However, you now have a group of men in your bathroom that are of no use whatsoever. You must decide how best to make use of them and your spare time before the bath is fitted.
I suggest getting down and dirty, which will make the bath all the more pleasurable.
I reckon it wouldn't take you long to round up a couple of burly blokes to lift it into place.
Just standing at your bedroom window with nothing on waving at any guys you see will soon have them knocking.
Once you have lured them in, find out which ones, if any, have experience with plumbing.
The best way to find out is to bend over to the now exposed pipes in your bathroom (still naked of course) and ask the gaggle of guys "does anyone know what size pipe fits in this hole?"
The one that tells you that a "3/4 inch copper pipe, welded with a bit of flux and horse hair should do the trick" is the one that you want.
Persuade him that if he fits the bath, you will give him the show of his life and I am sure he will obligingly fit the bath for you. Once the bath is fitted, sit him in front of the TV and put on the movie "Chicago". Promise repaid.
However, you now have a group of men in your bathroom that are of no use whatsoever. You must decide how best to make use of them and your spare time before the bath is fitted.
I suggest getting down and dirty, which will make the bath all the more pleasurable.
Well, I do have the bath fitted! Not the side, and neither are the tiles up, but I can bathe!
Might move an old oil drum in there so I can get a real feeling of ambiance.
I should invite Eager round before Friday (which is when they are going to finish the job)
My bathroom excites him :shock:
Venusxxx
Might move an old oil drum in there so I can get a real feeling of ambiance.
I should invite Eager round before Friday (which is when they are going to finish the job)
My bathroom excites him :shock:
Venusxxx
Quote by VenusnMars
Given the dimensions of my bathroom, anymore than two people in there would have to get down and dirty by default.
It`d be like a game of Twister!
Venusxxx
better stay out of the bathroom why the builders there then
unless hes a hottie but my experience of builders is there mainly very old men
and not perticularily attractive ones
builders arse anyone :moon:
Sex God
Quote by KcKat
I should invite Eager round before Friday (which is when they are going to finish the job)
My bathroom excites him :shock:
Venusxxx
Hunni, you'd never get him out again ;)
Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
On my way Venus. I lurrrrrrrrrrrrrve your bathroom just as it is. Please,please don't change anything!
Um.........................er.............................are there going to be any "attatchment" points in it when the work's finished?
ops: :grin: :!: Better scarper before KcKat sees this :!: :scared: :scared:
:whistling: :whistling: 
Sex God
Can all the people below please submit their guess what Venus actually smells of , pictures accepted .
Oh it`s even worse now Eager, the tiles are gone, masonry was dropping in the water whilst I was bathing, the bath has no side, so all the sawdust and earth wire is exposed underneath, and the new bath is missing a handle, and has holes in the side.
You`d love it
Did you get to see my black walled downstairs toilet with the graffiti, with the dead rusty freezer shoved inside?
Venusxxx
You`d love it
Did you get to see my black walled downstairs toilet with the graffiti, with the dead rusty freezer shoved inside?
Venusxxx
Sex God
Methinks the guy from the housing association is just making reasons to come back . Perhaps his eye for the ladies would explain his back worries .
Sex God
Quote by VenusnMars
Oh it`s even worse now Eager, the tiles are gone, masonry was dropping in the water whilst I was bathing, the bath has no side, so all the sawdust and earth wire is exposed underneath, and the new bath is missing a handle, and has holes in the side.
You`d love it
Did you get to see my black walled downstairs toilet with the graffiti, with the dead rusty freezer shoved inside?
Venusxxx
:shock: :shock: Ooooooooooooooh! Noooooooooooooooooooo. :doh:
It sounds wickedly sleazy. :twisted: :twisted:
Don't change it! :wink: :wink:
Quote by VenusnMars
Oh it`s even worse now Eager, the tiles are gone, masonry was dropping in the water whilst I was bathing, the bath has no side, so all the sawdust and earth wire is exposed underneath, and the new bath is missing a handle, and has holes in the side.
You`d love it
Did you get to see my black walled downstairs toilet with the graffiti, with the dead rusty freezer shoved inside?
Venusxxx
Holes in the bath????
Hey everyone, Venus has a bath with glory holes in it!!! :bounce: :bounce:
Sex God
they arent glory holes ! They are way more kinky than that ! Once a week she invites local perverts around with long straws and they drink her bath water ( thats what the holes are for ) .
Sex God
Quote by Silk and Big G
they arent glory holes ! They are way more kinky than that ! Once a week she invites local perverts around with long straws and they drink her bath water ( thats what the holes are for ) .
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: He hee!
That's one more of yer secrets revealed Venus!! :whistling: :lol: :P :twisted: 
Sounds like the place where I lived once, Venus -- had a concrete square bathtub just big enuff to stand up in it, about 2 feet tall, drained REAL slow Sex God
Quote by Eagerslut9
Oh it`s even worse now Eager, the tiles are gone, masonry was dropping in the water whilst I was bathing, the bath has no side, so all the sawdust and earth wire is exposed underneath, and the new bath is missing a handle, and has holes in the side.
You`d love it
Did you get to see my black walled downstairs toilet with the graffiti, with the dead rusty freezer shoved inside?
Venusxxx
:shock: :shock: Ooooooooooooooh! Noooooooooooooooooooo. :doh:
It sounds wickedly sleazy. :twisted: :twisted:
Don't change it! :wink: :wink:
eager i worry about you sometimes. i'm as open to the little fetishes and foibles of you lot as the next perv, but getting turned on by bathrooms and rusting freezers is NOT NORMAL! been spending too much time at these roadside stops mate!
n x x x ;)
