I was driving home about 10 minutes ago.... in the Landrover....
I glanced up at the rear view mirror... and to my horror.............. there it was......!!!!!
That bloody spider... or its twin brother was slowly walking along the mirror edge... my mind went into free-fall......... did i stop the car in the middle of the village... and scream like a banshee???? or should i keep calm and drive very fast the last few 100 metres home and throw the car into the driveway????
I opted for the latter...... i drove like a maniac... all the time keeping one eye on the mirror and the evil arse-kicking arachnid who was watching me with his beady eyes....Hoping and praying that it did not decide to jump down onto me.........
I reversed like a woman possessed and screeched the car to a halt... throwing open the drivers' door and jumping out of the car as fast as i could..... trying desperately not to scream too loudly....it was after all...... lol.
I could see the spider had now walked along the roof and was sitting in the corner by the drivers' window near the sunshield........... and thats where i have left it!!!!!! Its huge and horrible... and got hairy thick legs and an aura of pure evil........
I shall not be driving that car again until i have found the spider... and sent him to the shiny web in the sky....
It must be the closest i have come to total heart failure ever................. and the only thing that stopped me crashing into the wall along the lane was the thought of having to explain to the insurance company just what had happened........ lol
Any ideas as to how to catch this spider now its loose in the car......??????????
equi-princess xxx
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Sex God
Quote by equi-princess
Any ideas as to how to catch this spider now its loose in the car......??????????
equi-princess xxx
Tell it about this fantastic web site you've found ?
:rascal: :rascal: :rascal:
Quote by markz
set fire to the car :shock:
If i can't find it in the morning...... i may as well do that........and.....
Although not known for my reversing skills... i must admit that just this once i managed to get the landrover into the driveway in one move.... not the three it usually takes me... the car is now abandoned on the driveway..........
equi-princess xxx
It'll be looking for a closed in place so it'll still probably be behind or around the sun visor.I can tell your an arachnophobe so I won't hope that you might help it get out of the car and still alive. (I'm pro arachnid).
I would say get something like a piece of cane or some thin stick,leave the door open and try to harass it into getting out of it's hiding place by flicking the visor down with the stick.I wouldn't recommend trying to splat it as it's not the best space to take a full swing and you might damage something in the cab apart from the spider.
BTW If it's a big spider then it's female.
I would say get something like a piece of cane or some thin stick,leave the door open and try to harass it into getting out of it's hiding place by flicking the visor down with the stick.I wouldn't recommend trying to splat it as it's not the best space to take a full swing and you might damage something in the cab apart from the spider.
BTW If it's a big spider then it's female.
Quote by Sexysteph
Get a car valet service done on it then they can hoover the little sucker with their powerful hose giving it a shampoo and set for good measure
Steph
Sorry hunni it's the way you tell em :giggle:
Was it like this?
Steph..... the nearest valet station is over 10 miles away.... i'm not even going to go 10 metres in the car with that thing in it..... you can guarantee... i'd start off down the road and nothing would happen.... until... i go round a corner or something... and then.... it would appear grinning evilly at me and it would leap from the dashboard onto me.. and i would crash into the ditch........ i can see it now...... lol.
The hoover idea may just work... if i can find it and hold the hoover long enough to get rid of said spider without it crawling off somewhere else..... if it moves... i shall drop the hoover and be running back down the drive into the house......... lol
equi-princess xxx
Sex God
Why are people scared of spiders? I think they're cute :smug:
I have a huge one that lives in my house.... luckily it only comes out at night after my son has gone to bed.... I say lucky cos he is terrified of them...... no idea why, cos no-one else in the family is scared of them. He is even more scared of wood lice.......
I think it's odd.... please enlighten me
Damned spiders! Why can't they all just go and live on an uninhabited island, wher no-one would disturb them and they wouldn't scare anyone?
When I was learning to drive, a spider came down from the roof of my car and landed on my hand. I was quite impressed with the way I didn't panic (too much), just let out a muffled shout, opened the window, and shook it off my hand. It was only a small one though.
When I was learning to drive, a spider came down from the roof of my car and landed on my hand. I was quite impressed with the way I didn't panic (too much), just let out a muffled shout, opened the window, and shook it off my hand. It was only a small one though.
hmmm
ive got an idea....
maybe its been watching you in chat room and on the forums and quite fancies its chances....
it might be trying to chat you up in an arachnid sort of way...
i will keep a lookout for spider like ads on the photo ads.....could be a secret member.....maybe its bi...male or female....i think you need to examine it and let us know equi-princess
for sale.....land rover....must be collected....................
ive got an idea....
maybe its been watching you in chat room and on the forums and quite fancies its chances....
it might be trying to chat you up in an arachnid sort of way...
i will keep a lookout for spider like ads on the photo ads.....could be a secret member.....maybe its bi...male or female....i think you need to examine it and let us know equi-princess
for sale.....land rover....must be collected....................
Sex God
Quote by MadAtGravity
Cute? With their eight hairy, spindly legs, eight beady little eyes, and fecking mahoosive fangs? :shock:
Well, it is soooooooooooooo wrong to judge by looks alone :lol2: ......... spiders are our friends, they eat all those damn flies that like to play in shit then land straight on our food without even washing first
....... spiders should be embraced - cherished, even :giggle: Sex God
Introduce them to Religion. That might work.
:rascal:
:rascal:
Sex God
Quote by bluexxx
Why are people scared of spiders? I think they're cute :smug:
I have a huge one that lives in my house.... luckily it only comes out at night after my son has gone to bed.... I say lucky cos he is terrified of them...... no idea why, cos no-one else in the family is scared of them. He is even more scared of wood lice.......
I think it's odd.... please enlighten me
OMFG Blue where in the house? I'll be on bloody spider patrol now tonight, as if I haven't enough to be bloody nervous about :shock:
Quote by equi-princess
I opted for the latter...... i drove like a maniac... all the time keeping one eye on the mirror and the evil arse-kicking arachnid . . . . . . .
equi-princess xxx
I really am sorry to laugh, as I know how serious a problem it can be. To you and someone else.
But I just can't shake the image of a kick arse spider.
I see four pairs of Dr Martin's under two tone tone Levi staypress, white T-shirt, red braces and a short cropped No 1 cut on the body/head.
"Come 'n av a go if ya fink yer 'ard enuff"
Quote by dambuster
I opted for the latter...... i drove like a maniac... all the time keeping one eye on the mirror and the evil arse-kicking arachnid . . . . . . .
equi-princess xxx
I really am sorry to laugh, as I know how serious a problem it can be. To you and someone else.
But I just can't shake the image of a kick arse spider.
I see four pairs of Dr Martin's under two tone tone Levi staypress, white T-shirt, red braces and a short cropped No 1 cut on the body/head.
"Come 'n av a go if ya fink yer 'ard enuff"
Yeah!! ...... spiders are the skinheads of the bug world......
This one obviously is part of a much larger contingent and he's been sent round to collect this month's payment..... now give us the dosh missus or the car gets it!!!
'ere 'arry ........ this bird can't park proper like ....... whaddya reckon... trash the car??
Had a magic centipde once.......... sent it to the shops to get me some fags and after two hours it hadn't returned.. so i went looking for it and found it sitting on the stairs........I asked it where my fags were and it replied 'Gimme a fecking chance to get my shoes on guv!'
Sorry to really worry you Equi, but it is a well known fact that you EAT (yes swallow and digest) at least one spider a year in your sleep
Personally I like spiders, but hate dragon flies and most other creepy crawlies. If my GF sees one she goes mental, but I make her leave the webs alone cos they catch the flies (and they look pretty in the shimmering light too - awwww)
Nigel
Personally I like spiders, but hate dragon flies and most other creepy crawlies. If my GF sees one she goes mental, but I make her leave the webs alone cos they catch the flies (and they look pretty in the shimmering light too - awwww)
Nigel
Sex God
If you tape your mouth shut, do they go up your nose BWC?
Shudders
Shudders
Sex God
Quote by freckledbird
If you tape your mouth shut, do they go up your nose BWC?
Shudders
Sounds like it'd make sense to keep yer bum clenched together too! :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
:uhoh:
I checked the car carefully in the light of day this morning..................
Can i find the spider???????........... No..........
I know its there in the car... just waiting for its chance to drop from the sunroof or wherever its hiding....... the inevitable meeting between arachnid and terrified human won't be pretty....
equi-princess xxx
p.s. the thought of being stalked by a spider is enough to stop my heart from beating.....
Can i find the spider???????........... No..........
I know its there in the car... just waiting for its chance to drop from the sunroof or wherever its hiding....... the inevitable meeting between arachnid and terrified human won't be pretty....
equi-princess xxx
p.s. the thought of being stalked by a spider is enough to stop my heart from beating.....
Quote by equi-princess
I was driving home about 10 minutes ago.... in the Landrover....
I glanced up at the rear view mirror... and to my horror.............. there it was......!!!!!
That bloody spider... or its twin brother was slowly walking along the mirror edge... my mind went into free-fall......... did i stop the car in the middle of the village... and scream like a banshee???? or should i keep calm and drive very fast the last few 100 metres home and throw the car into the driveway????
I opted for the latter...... i drove like a maniac... all the time keeping one eye on the mirror and the evil arse-kicking arachnid who was watching me with his beady eyes....Hoping and praying that it did not decide to jump down onto me.........
I reversed like a woman possessed and screeched the car to a halt... throwing open the drivers' door and jumping out of the car as fast as i could..... trying desperately not to scream too loudly....it was after all...... lol.
I could see the spider had now walked along the roof and was sitting in the corner by the drivers' window near the sunshield........... and thats where i have left it!!!!!! Its huge and horrible... and got hairy thick legs and an aura of pure evil........
I shall not be driving that car again until i have found the spider... and sent him to the shiny web in the sky....
It must be the closest i have come to total heart failure ever................. and the only thing that stopped me crashing into the wall along the lane was the thought of having to explain to the insurance company just what had happened........ lol
Any ideas as to how to catch this spider now its loose in the car......??????????
equi-princess xxx
Oh ffs, what are you like woman!!!
It's a bloody ickle bitty spider, not a flamin' turantula. It's prolly a million more time scared of you than you are of it.
ignore it and it'll prolly pootle off somewhere else. :twisted:
Quote by bluexxx
Cute? With their eight hairy, spindly legs, eight beady little eyes, and fecking mahoosive fangs? :shock:
Well, it is soooooooooooooo wrong to judge by looks alone :lol2: ......... spiders are our friends, they eat all those damn flies that like to play in shit then land straight on our food without even washing first
....... spiders should be embraced - cherished, even :giggle:I was bitten by a tiny spider when trying to remove it from the house. It was less that an hour before my whole arm swole up and this was only a baby. The main problem is the amount of food we import especially bananas. I read last week that someone was bitten by a foreign spider and would not have lasted 24 hours without the antidote.
With this in mind, I will catch small ones in a glass but if it comes to me or them..................... Kill the *******
Sex God
chemical warfare is the only answer, get on the radio, call up "puff the magic dragon" give the coordinates of the said LR and authorize a liberal dusting of DDT.
oh and just to be on the safe side, mix some "Agent Orange" in there.
alternatively, a small can of arachnid killer will probably do the job.
hth
I love the smell of Napalm in the morning, ......... It smells of Victory
oh and just to be on the safe side, mix some "Agent Orange" in there.
alternatively, a small can of arachnid killer will probably do the job.
hth
I love the smell of Napalm in the morning, ......... It smells of Victory
Sex God
Quote by Godfather
I love the smell of Napalm in the morning, ......... It smells of Victory
Lance, I just want my surf board back?
dont you just love Wagner ..(flight of the valkyrie) ...... :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
