I'm quite new to the site, been a fully paid-up member on here for just over a month now, looking for action with females and couples, and, on two separate occasions, I've been contacted by a guy asking me to join him and his "girlfriend", with some fairly explicit details about what he'd like us all to do.
Fair enough. Sounds fine.
A meeting is set up and then..lo and behold with a couple of hours to go..we can't meet.
It's cancelled.
OK.
That happens.
In one case though the guy claims that his girlfriend has just been shagged by a "friend".. so isn't up for any more action.
A bit strange, a bit far-fetched I thought, but, still...
Let's fix another time.
So I wait
and wait.
Nada.
Sound of penny dropping...
A hoax.
a set-up.
a fantasy..
I don't know what it is, but I'm getting no reply every time I send a message.
It's happened twice now so I'm wise to the "Let's you and me shag my girlfriend" ploy.
What puzzles me is why guys do it...where is the satisfaction? What's the angle here?
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
Phantom girlfriends
Sex God
:welcome: to the forum!
Seems like a bit of a faff to me, I mean why bother making up a girlfriend?
Not sure what the answer is, unless you specify in your response or profile that you would like to speak to both of any couple you plan to meet fairly early on in any contact?
Seems like a bit of a faff to me, I mean why bother making up a girlfriend?
Not sure what the answer is, unless you specify in your response or profile that you would like to speak to both of any couple you plan to meet fairly early on in any contact?
Sex God
Hi and welcome
Ask to speak to both of them.
Ask to speak to both of them.
Yes Fran, it does sound a bit of a faff doesn't it? Why make up a girlfriend? Why indeed? That's what puzzles me...
I'm glad, but not entirely surprised, to see it hasn't just happened to me H.x.
I do take the point about insisting on speaking to both parties early on in the contact, though the first guy did say that he and his girlfriend didn't actually live together, and I had no particular reason to doubt his word at that point..in fact, it didn't occur to me then that he was fantasising...
Why go to the bother of making up a girlfriend?
I'm glad, but not entirely surprised, to see it hasn't just happened to me H.x.
I do take the point about insisting on speaking to both parties early on in the contact, though the first guy did say that he and his girlfriend didn't actually live together, and I had no particular reason to doubt his word at that point..in fact, it didn't occur to me then that he was fantasising...
Why go to the bother of making up a girlfriend?
Sex God
Unfortunately the net is full of fantasists and fakers exploiting the anonymity it affords.
There is a clue in your original post: he went into explicit details about what he would like to do.
There are people around, and not only men, who simply get their thrills in these sort of fantasy exchanges, pretending that they plan to set up a meet.
I agree with those above who say that you should insist on speaking to both partners in a supposed couple. If you have any doubts about the people being genuine, drop the whole thing - there are plenty of genuine people here. Good luck.
There is a clue in your original post: he went into explicit details about what he would like to do.
There are people around, and not only men, who simply get their thrills in these sort of fantasy exchanges, pretending that they plan to set up a meet.
I agree with those above who say that you should insist on speaking to both partners in a supposed couple. If you have any doubts about the people being genuine, drop the whole thing - there are plenty of genuine people here. Good luck.
Yes indeed, there are fantasists aplenty on the internet, and now I realise there are one or two here, but I do agree that there are fortunately plenty of genuine people here, and I have had some great meetings and met some really nice people.
Looking back to the initial discussion, I recollect that I was called away from my PC for a few minutes, and when I returned the guy was practically ranting: "Where are you?! Don't you want to f*** my girlfriend?" which did seem rather odd at the time as he had been so calm and convincing up to that point.
Picking up the point about contacting people by phone..this tends to be something I only get round to doing, if at all, when finding out an address for a meeting, and even then it's usually a text message. In this case, of course, I can see that it would have prevented a lot of wasted time, but, even so, he might have told some kind of tale about her being unavailable, especially as he claimed that they did not live together. I guess up until then I had only had dealings with genuine people on this site, and therefore had no reason to doubt him..
Looking back to the initial discussion, I recollect that I was called away from my PC for a few minutes, and when I returned the guy was practically ranting: "Where are you?! Don't you want to f*** my girlfriend?" which did seem rather odd at the time as he had been so calm and convincing up to that point.
Picking up the point about contacting people by phone..this tends to be something I only get round to doing, if at all, when finding out an address for a meeting, and even then it's usually a text message. In this case, of course, I can see that it would have prevented a lot of wasted time, but, even so, he might have told some kind of tale about her being unavailable, especially as he claimed that they did not live together. I guess up until then I had only had dealings with genuine people on this site, and therefore had no reason to doubt him..
Sex God
Hate to say it, but it sounds like there were certainly some warning signals on that one then! Without sounding all cynical and world-weary, I think that in this game you have to hone your instincts and really get good at relying on gut instinct.
Anyway, hope it works out - as Mike says, there are plenty of genuine folk out there.
noladreams30
Anyway, hope it works out - as Mike says, there are plenty of genuine folk out there.
noladreams30
Bonedigger you may well be right
It's a consoling thought..
As I'm sure some of you must know, looking back, it's not just the acres of time spent online with these sad bozo fantasists, but the foregone opportunity and meeting.. the one that could have been set up instead of the one that was never going to happen...that's what's so annoying
It's a consoling thought..
As I'm sure some of you must know, looking back, it's not just the acres of time spent online with these sad bozo fantasists, but the foregone opportunity and meeting.. the one that could have been set up instead of the one that was never going to happen...that's what's so annoying
Sex God
Gordon, I'm a single girl on this site. Apparently we are supposed to pretty much have the pick of the place.
I've been a member for 2 and a half years or so. First meet I arranged, I was stood up. I persevered. I have, on occasion, been sat in a hotel room waiting for someone only to get a text saying that they couldn't make it... an hour after they should've arrived. I persevered. I've responded to adverts. I've waited. I've heard nothing. I've persevered.
Why?
Because between all this I've had some bloody good meets, had a laugh and a banter in chat and on the forum, met some great people, had some amazing sexual experiences and made some cracking friends.
This site is absolutely a get out of it what you put in thing. You have to persevere. You have to stay positive.
Don't rue the missed opportunities; opt to create new ones instead!
Nola x
I've been a member for 2 and a half years or so. First meet I arranged, I was stood up. I persevered. I have, on occasion, been sat in a hotel room waiting for someone only to get a text saying that they couldn't make it... an hour after they should've arrived. I persevered. I've responded to adverts. I've waited. I've heard nothing. I've persevered.
Why?
Because between all this I've had some bloody good meets, had a laugh and a banter in chat and on the forum, met some great people, had some amazing sexual experiences and made some cracking friends.
This site is absolutely a get out of it what you put in thing. You have to persevere. You have to stay positive.
Don't rue the missed opportunities; opt to create new ones instead!
Nola x
When I first joined here. I answered an add for a local couple seeking a single man. They responded quickly and said how much they wanted to meet me. I was over the moon as you can imagine. On the site a matter of weeks and already found a couple.
However, every time and date I suggested the female wasn't available. This took a while and during that time I learnt a lot hanging around this place, perhaps became a little more cynical about what happened. I re-read the ad I had replied to. It had on a second or third reading been written by a man pretending to be a woman.
I sent my thoughts to the couple who just disappeared.
However, every time and date I suggested the female wasn't available. This took a while and during that time I learnt a lot hanging around this place, perhaps became a little more cynical about what happened. I re-read the ad I had replied to. It had on a second or third reading been written by a man pretending to be a woman.
I sent my thoughts to the couple who just disappeared.
Keeno, it does sound as if you had a very similar experience, learning about the site and its inhabitants in much the same way as I have, and becoming that little bit wiser.
Having said that, I would re-iterate the point I made in an earlier message in this thread and that is that I have had some good fun here on-line, some great meetings, and have generally enjoyed my time. This is by no means a rant or a moan, more of a cautionary tale.
Those of you who have been here already will know exactly what it's like, and it's good to hear from Keeno and Noladreams about their experiences and reactions to them.
Those who haven't experienced this just might like to beware, but don't be put off persisting with the general experience of making contact with genuine people who want to have fun.
Having said that, I would re-iterate the point I made in an earlier message in this thread and that is that I have had some good fun here on-line, some great meetings, and have generally enjoyed my time. This is by no means a rant or a moan, more of a cautionary tale.
Those of you who have been here already will know exactly what it's like, and it's good to hear from Keeno and Noladreams about their experiences and reactions to them.
Those who haven't experienced this just might like to beware, but don't be put off persisting with the general experience of making contact with genuine people who want to have fun.
You could go mad trying to second guess members motivations on this site. You just have to be very very careful. A forumite recently posted that if it seems to good to be true then it probably isn't real.
Lovely ad running at the moment by a single girl who is after single men, couples, woman, anything. It has been running for about a month and is renewed every 4 hours. She (if she is real) must have hoovered up every male on the site by now.
Lovely ad running at the moment by a single girl who is after single men, couples, woman, anything. It has been running for about a month and is renewed every 4 hours. She (if she is real) must have hoovered up every male on the site by now.
Quote by noladreams30
I've been a member for 2 and a half years or so. First meet I arranged, I was stood up. I persevered. I have, on occasion, been sat in a hotel room waiting for someone only to get a text saying that they couldn't make it... an hour after they should've arrived. I persevered. I've responded to adverts. I've waited. I've heard nothing. I've persevered.
All I can say is.....Bloody idiots!!!!
Quite why anybody would stand up the lovely ladies here is something I cannot fathom!!!
Sex God
Quote by Sixfootsix
I've been a member for 2 and a half years or so. First meet I arranged, I was stood up. I persevered. I have, on occasion, been sat in a hotel room waiting for someone only to get a text saying that they couldn't make it... an hour after they should've arrived. I persevered. I've responded to adverts. I've waited. I've heard nothing. I've persevered.
All I can say is.....Bloody idiots!!!!
Quite why anybody would stand up the lovely ladies here is something I cannot fathom!!!
Bless :rose:
Never fear, "Pimp Daddy Six" will be back soon!
Right, who wants a good flirtin'? :twisted:
All I can say is.....Bloody idiots!!!!
Quite why anybody would stand up the lovely ladies here is something I cannot fathom!!!
Bless :rose:
Right, who wants a good flirtin'? :twisted:
Quote by noladreams30
I've been a member for 2 and a half years or so. First meet I arranged, I was stood up. I persevered. I have, on occasion, been sat in a hotel room waiting for someone only to get a text saying that they couldn't make it... an hour after they should've arrived. I persevered. I've responded to adverts. I've waited. I've heard nothing. I've persevered.
All I can say is.....Bloody idiots!!!!
Quite why anybody would stand up the lovely ladies here is something I cannot fathom!!!
Bless :rose:
Quote by keeno
When I first joined here. I answered an add for a local couple seeking a single man. They responded quickly and said how much they wanted to meet me. I was over the moon as you can imagine. On the site a matter of weeks and already found a couple.
However, every time and date I suggested the female wasn't available. This took a while and during that time I learnt a lot hanging around this place, perhaps became a little more cynical about what happened. I re-read the ad I had replied to. It had on a second or third reading been written by a man pretending to be a woman.
I sent my thoughts to the couple who just disappeared.
Every time I see a profile that is a single man but with a couples icon in the chat rooms (or the other way round come to that), I report it to admin.
With luck, this little bit helps in preventing some of the horror stories we constantly see on this site (as well as others).
There are so many "walter mitty's" around these days it's a wonder anyone gets round to have a genuine meet!
its hard to believe why people would come on such a site and just make up aload of lies, surely they r going to be found out sooner or later. Once found out do they get banned from the site or do they just carry on the Charade for the next poor person they contact. I must say we have been very lucky and always met very nice people made some really nice friends. But we always ask for face pics really early on and chat on phone to both people or msn and cam first. Belt and braces lol. hopefully you will continue and find that there are some really nice friendly people on here. That love to play.
Swinger, in the light of what you've said perhaps I should report this Walter Mitty moron to the SH administrator. As you rightly point out, he's probably weaving the same time-wasting fantasies with others. I'd be happy to let anyone know who it is in private, but perhaps ought not to reveal his identity in open. Actually, there are two guilty parties here: one male and one "couple", but it was the single male who lead me a merry dance while the other one was a little eager and perhaps had ideas that did not go down so well with his partner..
Thats the net for YOU!! u pay, u dont pay for these sites .. you take your chance..oh i love the world wide web :PI have met a few "walter Mittys" on the site...single blokes pretending they had a partner they wanted me to shag whilst they watched/joined in. I found it a little bit strange.
I wondered their motivation...
were they fantasists?, were they just bi and wanted to get me on my own?... i have no idea...
i have heard it also happening to couples.. so the "Walter" could hopefully get a 3some ...with the couple.
the amazing thing ive found tho is the amount of people who accuse me of having a girlfriend/wife/partner because they dont believe im single.
can you win?
I wondered their motivation...
were they fantasists?, were they just bi and wanted to get me on my own?... i have no idea...
i have heard it also happening to couples.. so the "Walter" could hopefully get a 3some ...with the couple.
the amazing thing ive found tho is the amount of people who accuse me of having a girlfriend/wife/partner because they dont believe im single.
can you win?
Actually, sweetshygurl..you do pay for full access to this site, but that's not the point. (Actually, I'm not entirely sure what point you were making, but, never mind and thanks for your contribution.)
The need to pay is not going to deter these characters...and, yes, the internet is a big scary place with all sorts of loony-tunes rattling around in its bi-ways and corridors, but it also connects people in a way that no other medium has managed to do before now.
DeeCee it sounds as if you have had a similar experience which is both reassuring and disturbing at the same time..
The need to pay is not going to deter these characters...and, yes, the internet is a big scary place with all sorts of loony-tunes rattling around in its bi-ways and corridors, but it also connects people in a way that no other medium has managed to do before now.
DeeCee it sounds as if you have had a similar experience which is both reassuring and disturbing at the same time..
