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players , voyours or time wasters

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through my trawl of the internet, and lack of success in meeting up with someone, have had phone numbers, people wanting sexy chat etc, was wondering what people are here for, judging by the posts there seems to be some genuine players, also alot of time wasters. was wondering about a players only forum. could be stricter membership categories.
Like what, exactly?
Quote by mal609
Like what, exactly?

Oooh, like people who only want to meet guys whos name starts with 'F' and ends with numerics, maybe?
Quote by mal609
Like what, exactly?

You're a bit slow there Mal.
Surely the moderator's casting couch????
I'm quite happy to arrange player only meets..... in my living room...... sod the forum...... sexy girls, and blokes with a liking for strap ons need only apply rotflmao
JOKE, before I get loads of PMs..... oh go on then, why not.... :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
I take it that was it then? A statement and nothing else? If I'd known I would have locked it!
Mal
wink
What's a "player"? I play Championship Manager 4, does that qualify me?
Quote by Vix
Like what, exactly?

Oooh, like people who only want to meet guys whos name starts with 'F' and ends with numerics, maybe?
OUCH!
Quote by Flavio12000
through my trawl of the internet, and lack of success in meeting up with someone, have had phone numbers, people wanting sexy chat etc, was wondering what people are here for, judging by the posts there seems to be some genuine players, also alot of time wasters. was wondering about a players only forum. could be stricter membership categories.

Hmm, lot is disagree with in this, this is the cafe, it supposed to be for a wider audience. Define a player? You really want to cut off all those who socially swing? Or is there no such thing as someone with an open mindset, but limits on where they want to go for whatever reason?
For example my other half who is not out for swinging right now but posted some acclaimed pics which people seem to have enjoyed. She is involved at a social level with another couple met through here, and brings another view to this world. We could bar her as she wont part with her knickers, but it would be to the forums loss IMHO.
Define a stricter membership category? Only had sex with someone on the forum? Only after penetrative sex? That would just be a meat market, not a meeting of real people. If you want a list of people defiantly willing to sleep with you then that does not seem a swinging site you want.
We think this is just someone who has been messed about too often sounding off.
This is a cafe, and so should welcome everyone, when we started we knew nothing, and had done nothing, so we not have been able to join in. It was because we could join in that we got the answers we needed and have now started to have some real fun.
This forum in its current format really helped. Leave it as it is.
Quote by mindblowing
We think this is just someone who has been messed about too often sounding off.
This is a cafe, and so should welcome everyone, when we started we knew nothing, and had done nothing, so we not have been able to join in. It was because we could join in that we got the answers we needed and have now started to have some real fun.
This forum in its current format really helped. Leave it as it is.

indeed! without the forum accepting "non-players" while they learnt a bit more about it, and got there heads round it, some of them wouldn't be playing now! that's what the cafe's for IMHO!
neil x x x ;)
Quote by neilinleeds
We think this is just someone who has been messed about too often sounding off.
This is a cafe, and so should welcome everyone, when we started we knew nothing, and had done nothing, so we not have been able to join in. It was because we could join in that we got the answers we needed and have now started to have some real fun.
This forum in its current format really helped. Leave it as it is.

indeed! without the forum accepting "non-players" while they learnt a bit more about it, and got there heads round it, some of them wouldn't be playing now! that's what the cafe's for IMHO!
neil x x x ;)
i agree and the only way to break down negative stereotypes is through integration, those who don't swing are indeed helping make swinging a more tolerated activity. The more people who see it as another "normal" aspect of sexuality the better ... you won't make that happen by excluding people though ....
Well, as a swinger who doesn't swing...*for now* here's my opinion on a suggestion like that.
flipa
Quote by Libra-Love
Well, as a swinger who doesn't swing...*for now* here's my opinion on a suggestion like that.
flipa

Hmm Libra, I tried very hard to avoid being personal, but I always wanted to use that smiley so I agree with you, from me and wife about this threads idea...
:flipa::flipa:
Quote by tallnhairy
Well, as a swinger who doesn't swing...*for now* here's my opinion on a suggestion like that.
flipa

Hmm Libra, I tried very hard to avoid being personal, but I always wanted to use that smiley so I agree with you, from me and wife about this threads idea...
:flipa::flipa:
No, you're right about being personal and I don't want to go there either. I've nothing against Flavio12000 himself. It's the idea I'm against. And I do so love this cheeky icon. So to reiterate my views...
:flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa: :flipa:
It seems like once a week, you get a guy coming in here complaining that people are timewasters or aren't players. This normally seems to translate as "Everyone should jump straight into bed with me or else they aren't genuine".
Most of the people in this forum have experience of swinging, and because they do they realise the value of chatting, getting to know people and generally having a good time before (or if) they want to fuck someone. Most of the guys who come here and whinge seem not to bother being friendly or chatting. They just expect a queue of people to form in front of them, full of women who are desperate to shag them.
My advice to those men is to realise that there are many reasons why people might not want to fuck them. Yes, it may be true that some people here are timewasters, but there are also who are just discriminating about who they play with, and they are not likely to bother with cocksure single males who don't bother to introduce themselves and yet expect the world to fall at their feet.
Trys to sit on all those fingers well its looks a little like I imagine the inside of that love machine that so nearly saw off Barbarella...hmmmm
Oh and by the way ...don't change this forum ...its wonderfully open and is successful for that very reason Restrict it and stifle it .
Oh and I am not a player and may not ever be ...want to explain to me why I cant be a member anymore rolleyes
We are not swingers but I would be very sad to be excluded.
FFS I'd need a cold turkey SHAGGER. Geez the connotatation of that with Christmas and frozen turkeys coming up has just registered with me!!
Quote by GregLondon
It seems like once a week, you get a guy coming in here complaining that people are timewasters or aren't players. This normally seems to translate as "Everyone should jump straight into bed with me or else they aren't genuine".
Most of the people in this forum have experience of swinging, and because they do they realise the value of chatting, getting to know people and generally having a good time before (or if) they want to fuck someone. Most of the guys who come here and whinge seem not to bother being friendly or chatting. They just expect a queue of people to form in front of them, full of women who are desperate to shag them.
My advice to those men is to realise that there are many reasons why people might not want to fuck them. Yes, it may be true that some people here are timewasters, but there are also who are just discriminating about who they play with, and they are not likely to bother with cocksure single males who don't bother to introduce themselves and yet expect the world to fall at their feet.

to be honest greg, as a single male, i'm a bit fucking sick of seeing it! as are most! and they wonder where the reticence comes from! even single males can take their time getting there, cos there's all kinds of deep emotional stuff to work out sometimes. it's not nearly as easy as the easy shag brigade think at times! nice one!
neil x x x ;)
Quote by GregLondon
It seems like once a week, you get a guy coming in here complaining that people are timewasters or aren't players. This normally seems to translate as "Everyone should jump straight into bed with me or else they aren't genuine".
Most of the people in this forum have experience of swinging, and because they do they realise the value of chatting, getting to know people and generally having a good time before (or if) they want to fuck someone. Most of the guys who come here and whinge seem not to bother being friendly or chatting. They just expect a queue of people to form in front of them, full of women who are desperate to shag them.
My advice to those men is to realise that there are many reasons why people might not want to fuck them. Yes, it may be true that some people here are timewasters, but there are also who are just discriminating about who they play with, and they are not likely to bother with cocksure single males who don't bother to introduce themselves and yet expect the world to fall at their feet.

From what you write you have obviously been on this site a lot longer than 17th September 2004 Greg ??????
Think it is wrong to assume the majority of people here are swingers. I know as many people on here who have as yet to make that decision as those who have decided that it is what they want to do. There are plenty of sites I am sure where you can just meet for sex which is what single people, male and female, do which is not swinging even in the loosest definition. There are also I am sure sites for couples who are swingers who just want to meet couples and singles without needing a forum to develop a rapport with them.
The uniqueness of this site is that the forum could in reality be part of a non swinging site as the threads are varied in content - some very obviously swinging related, others humourous, sad, thought provoking and supportive. Some are basically crap lol :lol: . This format seems to to work for the majority of people and those that join in whatever catergory you fall into in terms of your tastes and desires stand a fighting chance of meeting like minded people.
I am not after a quick and easy shag that is not something that interests me. Alot of what I have said has been misinterpreted , I value peoples opinions in here. It is just there are alot of timewasters around. People arranging meets and not showing up. I am sure this has happenned to alot of people. Obviously some people are curious , or want to share experiences and may not be in the scene now. That is fine and welcome. So not having ago at those who won't shag around , swing etc. I also do not feel I am a disgruntled single guy ( most of those are in my local biggrin ), love the intellectual shagging in here
Nope. I joined here on 17th September. I'm just used to posting on messageboards. They really are all the same, even if this one is about swinging.
I should clarify what I was saying. What I mean is that most people here are genuine. Either they are swingers, or they are curious - but either way, they are honest about themselves and what they want. The people who post in the Cafe are mostly genuine, friendly people and it annoys me when people come here to complain about non-response to ads, because most people who post ads don't post here. They place their ad in haste, and then check their email once a month when they remember. I'd like to think that the people who post in here are genuine enough to reply to ads, even if it's just to say "thanks but no thanks".
Quote by mindblowing
We think this is just someone who has been messed about too often sounding off.
This is a cafe, and so should welcome everyone, when we started we knew nothing, and had done nothing, so we not have been able to join in. It was because we could join in that we got the answers we needed and have now started to have some real fun.
This forum in its current format really helped. Leave it as it is.

I'm new to this myself and so far am getting into the swing of viewing and joining in on posts. But I whole heartedly agree with the above comment. The fact that it's a cafe, where in real life you may go in not knowing anyone, you go back the next day, the next day and so on. Eventually people will start chatting to you or you to somebody else !
Quote by corriefem
The uniqueness of this site is that the forum could in reality be part of a non swinging site as the threads are varied in content - some very obviously swinging related, others humourous, sad, thought provoking and supportive. Some are basically crap lol :lol: . This format seems to to work for the majority of people and those that join in whatever catergory you fall into in terms of your tastes and desires stand a fighting chance of meeting like minded people.

Well said corrie.
We are very definitely "players" but use the site for light-hearted entertainment. We don't look for meets from here, although we have met with folk from this site. These forums certainly allow people to find their feet in the swinging world without the danger of going in over their heads. The mix of people in here is good and the variety of threads leaves something for everyone.
It's like anything else in life: you reap what you sow.
It annoys me when people think they can post an ad and wait for the semi-naked dancing girls to roll in. If they get lucky, great! But when they don't, they inevitably come here (I've seen it 10 times and I've only been here 2 weeks) and start complaining. But they've made no attempt to be friendly or interract - they just moan.
Quote by GregLondon
It annoys me when people think they can post an ad and wait for the semi-naked dancing girls to roll in.

I don't even have to post an ad - I just have to turn on my TV and there they are. :P