Sex God
Well we've only been here about 3 months, and we haven't been to a munch yet, but we've done socials met people, and it's working for us
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Please explain the purpose of this site???
Been here a lot longer, but I was at my first munch within a few months. I have made a good few socials, and one club meet since then and it has been a blast. However if you have a chip on your shoulder, even as a couple (As single males get a more difficult ride in general) you will not get anywhere...
I believe that if you sit back & get a feel for the forum & don't come blindly on the site posting willy nilly & without thought you are far more likely to get involved. Don't expect too much & you will be pleasantly surprised with the response from fellow members on SH.
I have been around for the last two months but have only very recently been posting seriously (I mean often). In the meantime I have spent time reading many posts on the forum, had several PM conversations with forum members & even a few meets. Infact following a PM to NWC I was even included in the invite list for Saturday's Munch, an evening hubby & I are looking forward to.
I believe this has all happened because I have been patient & enjoyed getting to know the forum members even if only reading their posts! Hopefully I will be able to get to know some of you in person at the weekend.
It is all about your attitude and how you come across to existing members, obviously by the nature of 'The Lifestyle' they are cautious of newcomers & rightly so.
This is not a pop at sccouple but more of a reply to their critism of becoming involved in the forum & the community. I think I am living proof that you can be accepted & enjoy the benefits of the site.
I have been around for the last two months but have only very recently been posting seriously (I mean often). In the meantime I have spent time reading many posts on the forum, had several PM conversations with forum members & even a few meets. Infact following a PM to NWC I was even included in the invite list for Saturday's Munch, an evening hubby & I are looking forward to.
I believe this has all happened because I have been patient & enjoyed getting to know the forum members even if only reading their posts! Hopefully I will be able to get to know some of you in person at the weekend.
It is all about your attitude and how you come across to existing members, obviously by the nature of 'The Lifestyle' they are cautious of newcomers & rightly so.
This is not a pop at sccouple but more of a reply to their critism of becoming involved in the forum & the community. I think I am living proof that you can be accepted & enjoy the benefits of the site.
Sex God
Quote by SauciSpouse
I believe that if you sit back & get a feel for the forum & don't come blindly on the site posting willy nilly & without thought you are far more likely to get involved. Don't expect too much & you will be pleasantly surprised with the response from fellow members on SH.
I have been around for the last two months but have only very recently been posting seriously (I mean often). In the meantime I have spent time reading many posts on the forum, had several PM conversations with forum members & even a few meets. Infact following a PM to NWC I was even included in the invite list for Saturday's Munch, an evening hubby & I are looking forward to.
I believe this has all happened because I have been patient & enjoyed getting to know the forum members even if only reading their posts! Hopefully I will be able to get to know some of you in person at the weekend.
It is all about your attitude and how you come across to existing members, obviously by the nature of 'The Lifestyle' they are cautious of newcomers & rightly so.
This is not a pop at sccouple but more of a reply to their critism of becoming involved in the forum & the community. I think I am living proof that you can be accepted & enjoy the benefits of the site.
Aaaaaaaaaawh! That's a lovely post! :happy:
Sex God
Yep it's all about attitude, but it's pretty academic now cos their last post said they were going, but then again so did the one before 
Sex God
Quote by sccouple
Yes! We have been taking note and reading your replies
What? Back again?
Sadly some of you took offence to our blunt remarks, to which we are truly sorry. But under the circumstances, it was the only way to get to the truth we were looking for.
Bollocks
Yes! like many of you out there, we understand the meaning of responsibility, security but most importantly respect and the truth.
Believe that when you prove it!
For the record: Although we are newbies to your site we followed your rules by joining in as much as feasably as possible... replying to threads ...new topics etc as commitments would allow.
Well it takes more than that then - get real!
We understand that some of you are just content with sitting behind a computer to get your kicks... thats fine
Patronising shiite!
Some of you, like us, want to get out and meet other like minded people to socialise and when some sort of trust has bonded, then go wherever the mutual mood takes us (this is not our first time in that department) so we do understand
I don't think you do
However, when we did kindly ask to attend your socials and meets... we either got no replies or told we were too new... despite learning tonight that single males get invited in far less time (a week!)
Patience FFS!
When we asked if anyone wanted to meet us.. Yes!, people initially replied to which we were greatful and excited but unfortunately when we responded back in turn... no one wanted to know anymore.
Patience
A further attempt was made to arrange a social meet... but again no one replied or explained why we were given the cold shoulder.
Patience and get yerselves known better and you'll get a much better response (am I sounding like a broken record here - or what??
dosnt this count as making an effort? Althogh 37 replies wasnt enough... we are restricted as "newbies" we loose either way
See above
we are not a pushy couple as when we get no replies... we respect that and so we dont continue to pester, we just want an honest answer
Get away!
Yes we know that we have only been on this site for a short while, and must wait until we are vetted and trusted by everyone before we are allowed to meet. but when we here of single males being trusted in far less time than a harmless "family" couple like us, you cant blame us for feeling a bit let down and disapointed?
Blah- de blah- de blah!
Think about it! anyone can hide behind a computer screen and call themselfs what they want and say what they like! I and no one would be any of the wiser! All WE tried to do is let everyone see exactly what we were really like... Honesty comes before Trust.
Disappointingly, our last thread reavealed just how many of you were quick to jump down on us, take the piss and tell us where to go. Admittingly although we wernt excited about many of your comments.. But it did at least explain how you REALLY felt about us, and it did explain why we were being ignored when it came to following up with those intended meets.
If your asking us to prove ourselfs behind a computer screen, then sorry we cannot. As we could lie to you as much as possible, and vise versa.
Now the truth is out! there is no more bad feelings from us with the fact, that you do not wish to know us.... just wish you were more honest with us in the first place.
Obviously, as a result of tonights revelations we will not be visiting the site anymore. Thank fuck fer that I'm useless at this interspersing quote thingy !!!Caz is too upset by this all and I have always backed her 500%. So if anyone knows who is responsible for removing our details from your list could you please either pass on this message or delete them for us, as i cant seem to able to do this myself
The best of luck to you all in what you do to be happy
Thanks
I know you all gonna think I am a softy ............. but I dont care :giggle:
I remember how daunting it was when I first joined .............. it actually took me 3 months to even register in the forum .......... just because I thought everyone knew what they wanted and I didnt ..............
So ........... I know what they are saying is not great but....................can we give them a little encouragement instead of the open and shut the door thingie ????
me instead ........... coz I like it :giggle:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I remember how daunting it was when I first joined .............. it actually took me 3 months to even register in the forum .......... just because I thought everyone knew what they wanted and I didnt ..............
So ........... I know what they are saying is not great but....................can we give them a little encouragement instead of the open and shut the door thingie ????
me instead ........... coz I like it :giggle:Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sex God
Quote by blonde
I know you all gonna think I am a softy ............. but I dont care :giggle:
I remember how daunting it was when I first joined .............. it actually took me 3 months to even register in the forum .......... just because I thought everyone knew what they wanted and I didnt ..............
So ........... I know what they are saying is not great but....................can we give them a little encouragement instead of the open and shut the door thingie ????
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
:shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
:wink: :rascal: 
Sex God
Quote by sccouple
when we here of single males being trusted in far less time than a harmless "family" couple like us, you cant blame us for feeling a bit let down and disapointed?
So tell me, your high-and-mightyship... what exactly makes you more trustworthy than me?
Is it the fact that your marital status naturally makes you superior to me?
Is it the fact that you've been whingeing here for five minutes while I've been making friends for two years?
Is it because being a single male I am inevitably harmful?
I'm not normally given to swearing in anger, but pray, tell me... just who the FUCK do you think you are?!
Quote by Ice Pie
when we here of single males being trusted in far less time than a harmless "family" couple like us, you cant blame us for feeling a bit let down and disapointed?
So tell me, your high-and-mightyship... what exactly makes you more trustworthy than me?
Is it the fact that your marital status naturally makes you superior to me?
Is it the fact that you've been whingeing here for five minutes while I've been making friends for two years?
Is it because being a single male I am inevitably harmful?
I'm not normally given to swearing in ager, but pray, tell me... just who the FUCK do you think you are?!
Wasn't that a spice girls song?
Quote by Ice Pie
I'm not normally given to swearing in ager, but pray, tell me... just who the FUCK do you think you are?!
Um, I have had a typo shoved in my face in this thread, so now it's my turn -
I dunno where Ager is, but I bet you are allowed to swear there.
Other than that, I agree totally with what you have said.
(Is that a first?)
Quote by Vix
I'm not normally given to swearing in ager, but pray, tell me... just who the FUCK do you think you are?!
Um, I have had a typo shoved in my face in this thread, so now it's my turn -
I dunno where Ager is, but I bet you are allowed to swear there.
Other than that, I agree totally with what you have said.
(Is that a first?)
I shoved what in your face?
Sex God
Quote by Vix
I'm not normally given to swearing in ager, but pray, tell me... just who the FUCK do you think you are?!
Um, I have had a typo shoved in my face in this thread, so now it's my turn -
I dunno where Ager is, but I bet you are allowed to swear there.
Other than that, I agree totally with what you have said.
(Is that a first?)
I corrected it long before you hit the submit button... that's the trouble with typing with one hand. :lol2:
Sex God
Because, Sam, they were aggressive in the first place and they flounced - I give up too!
Sex God
Quote by blonde
Why do we do this to people ............. who havent been here as long as we have ????
I truely dont know :cry:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sam, usually I'd agree with you, I hate the "newbie baiting" trend. However, I feel that the thread started off with a lot of common sense advice (maybe I'm biased because I was one of those trying to help) and it was all thrown back at us. As Ice said, they'd already made their decision before they posted and this thread was solely so that they could make out that nobody on the site actually meets.
When they then complained about a single male (shock horror!!) being invited to a munch after he'd shown humour and personality on his posts instead of the whining they've done, they really shot themselves in the foot. My personal view is that they don't want to be helped, they just want to call us all ignorant timewasters who simply sit at our computers and never actually meet each other. I'm not very happy with that accusation and evidently I'm not the only one
Quote by Angel Chat
Why do we do this to people ............. who havent been here as long as we have ????
I truely dont know :cry:
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sam, usually I'd agree with you, I hate the "newbie baiting" trend. However, I feel that the thread started off with a lot of common sense advice (maybe I'm biased because I was one of those trying to help) and it was all thrown back at us. As Ice said, they'd already made their decision before they posted and this thread was solely so that they could make out that nobody on the site actually meets.
When they then complained about a single male (shock horror!!) being invited to a munch after he'd shown humour and personality on his posts instead of the whining they've done, they really shot themselves in the foot. My personal view is that they don't want to be helped, they just want to call us all ignorant timewasters who simply sit at our computers and never actually meet each other. I'm not very happy with that accusation and evidently I'm not the only one
I posted too !!! I was one of the ones who tried to help on page 1 (Ithink it was 1)
But I also remember how daunting this place was as a newbie ........... thats all I am trying to say ............. we pride ourselves on being a friendly site ............. is what we've done in here friendly ??? but compaired to most I am still a relative newbie ......... so I 'll shurrup.
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sex God
Quote by blonde
But I also remember how daunting this place was as a newbie ........... thats all I am trying to say ............. we pride ourselves on being a friendly site ............. is what we've done in here friendly ??? but compaired to most I am still a relative newbie ......... so I 'll shurrup.
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
I take your point Sam, and I don't like newbie-baiting either, but this clown had already made up his mind that we're all losers and bit the heads off the people who were trying to help him.
When you treat people with respect and they respond with insults, anything goes.
Quote by Bloke2005
Sam, don't shurrup or give up....
They had it coming I think....
Did they ????
They are newbies and dont know how things work ........... some of us stay quiet until we do know .......... but others post how they feel !
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
anyway .............. I am sure you will all think I am wrong ....... I just remember how difficult it was to be a newbie
Quote by sccouple
Yes we know that we have only been on this site for a short while, and must wait until we are vetted and trusted by everyone before we are allowed to meet. but when we here of single males (that means me!!! im famous!!!!!) being trusted in far less time than a harmless "family" couple like us, you cant blame us for feeling a bit let down and disapointed?
Hmmmmm you know hes right my only intention is to bludgeon you all to jelly with a chrome hatstand, which i then intend to sell to a modern art galley as a piece of rather outstandingly good conceptual art.
I cant believe my motives are so transparent!!!!!!!!!
Hey so if im not harmless does that make me wild and excitingly sexy?
YAYYYYYYY
Quote by blonde
Sam, don't shurrup or give up....
They had it coming I think....
Did they ????
They are newbies and dont know how things work ........... some of us stay quiet until we do know .......... but others post how they feel !
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
anyway .............. I am sure you will all think I am wrong ....... I just remember how difficult it was to be a newbie
Sam - their post seemed very premeditated and I think they knew exactly how things worked here but had underestimated the passion, intellect and even the sensitivity of some of the people on here whom they choose to generalise about and verbally abuse...
Merely the fact that they felt the need to justify themselves at great length is an obvious sign of guilt in my experience.. i.e. the guilt of knowing they were posting bollox and on a hiding to nothing
Sex God
There's many times I've intervened to stop newbie-baiting but only when they've made an innocent mistake. This was deliberate antagonisation - so.. no sympathy here I'm afraid.
Sex God
Quote by blonde
Sam, don't shurrup or give up....
They had it coming I think....
Did they ????
They are newbies and dont know how things work ........... some of us stay quiet until we do know .......... but others post how they feel !
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
anyway .............. I am sure you will all think I am wrong ....... I just remember how difficult it was to be a newbie
Sorry Sam. I have to disagree with you.
They were patronising in my opinion and just full of negativity.
Don't fit in here.
:wink:
Sex God
Hi, my names Plum (Dlep in chat), and although I'll probably say something that is naive (after all Im a newbie too...), I thought I should comment.
Im a shy person, so its taken time to get to know people here...in fact I was using Chat a fair bit before I started using the forum....
Im also aware that as a single male, it'll be more difficult to mingle with people here because they arent necessarily looking for someone like me. Thats disappointing (from my point of view) but understandable...I would love to go to munches right now but, realise I have to wait. Meeting people in circumstances like this is about trust. People have to feel comfortable and I do too. I have made a few friends here (they know who they are..I wont mention names...it'll take a while for a start...lol) but I have felt nothing but encouragement from them...in fact 3 gals on chat really helped me on Sunday night come to terms with the fact that Im bi-curious or what ever term you feel is appropriate... That wouldnt have happened anywhere else...and they all always acknowledge me when I come on chat...
Ive also been fortunate to have the following happen in a very short space of time....
Been put on reserve for Mids 2006..thanks DreamerHelen...
Been invited to Notts in January 06 by Claire and Steve,,,again thanks :D
And finally through one of the threads I have been in contact with someone by phone (again name withheldtout of respect to them...)
I honestly didnt think ANY of this was going to happen so soon...I am glad that they have happened, but I WOULD have waited longer for them to happen. Patience is whats needed...and believe me, at times I am NOT a patient person. :shock:
Any way, I HONESTLY hope that you do find what you are looking for, whether or not it is on this site....okay?
Hope to see you ALL soon....this year, next year...when ever. :D
Im a shy person, so its taken time to get to know people here...in fact I was using Chat a fair bit before I started using the forum....
Im also aware that as a single male, it'll be more difficult to mingle with people here because they arent necessarily looking for someone like me. Thats disappointing (from my point of view) but understandable...I would love to go to munches right now but, realise I have to wait. Meeting people in circumstances like this is about trust. People have to feel comfortable and I do too. I have made a few friends here (they know who they are..I wont mention names...it'll take a while for a start...lol) but I have felt nothing but encouragement from them...in fact 3 gals on chat really helped me on Sunday night come to terms with the fact that Im bi-curious or what ever term you feel is appropriate... That wouldnt have happened anywhere else...and they all always acknowledge me when I come on chat...
Ive also been fortunate to have the following happen in a very short space of time....
Been put on reserve for Mids 2006..thanks DreamerHelen...
Been invited to Notts in January 06 by Claire and Steve,,,again thanks :D
And finally through one of the threads I have been in contact with someone by phone (again name withheldtout of respect to them...)
I honestly didnt think ANY of this was going to happen so soon...I am glad that they have happened, but I WOULD have waited longer for them to happen. Patience is whats needed...and believe me, at times I am NOT a patient person.
:shock: Any way, I HONESTLY hope that you do find what you are looking for, whether or not it is on this site....okay?
Hope to see you ALL soon....this year, next year...when ever. :D
