i would be very interested to hear about how you have handled your partner having sex with someone else.
most would be angry, some would just let it go,and some would encourage it, how did you find the solution or strength to handle the problem ????
thank you if you reply
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psychology of swinging ?
:) 
Sex God
hi there
It sounds to me like you havent actually discussed swinging properly with you wife.
Maybe sit her down and talk about what you want and take it from there............
It sounds to me like you havent actually discussed swinging properly with you wife.
Maybe sit her down and talk about what you want and take it from there............
Quote by Buggered
i would be very interested to hear about how you have handled your partner having sex with someone else.
most would be angry, some would just let it go,and some would encourage it, how did you find the solution or strength to handle the problem ????
thank you if you reply
Are you talking about swinging or finding out your partner has had an affair?
If "most would be angry" then they shouldn't be here really, not a problem for us because we are both in agreement with our swinging.
Sex God
Anger never entered the equasion for us we just both like it.
If you were talking how is it to know or watch your partner is having sex with another partner then. Ok i admit to at the outset having a couple of 'should we/is this right moments' - and after talking talking? yeah we (most definately) should.
Saying that god how we thrashed it out before we started. And my words would be - they're aint no going back once its started so make darn sure.
we are happy we did so can't say nothing really bad about it. Still get excited about it still fancy my mrs like crazy. Love her to distraction.
If you were talking how is it to know or watch your partner is having sex with another partner then. Ok i admit to at the outset having a couple of 'should we/is this right moments' - and after talking talking? yeah we (most definately) should.
Saying that god how we thrashed it out before we started. And my words would be - they're aint no going back once its started so make darn sure.
we are happy we did so can't say nothing really bad about it. Still get excited about it still fancy my mrs like crazy. Love her to distraction.
Quote by BuggeredFirst partner, W is my life partner, not just sex, she means the world to me.
i would be very interested to hear about how you have handled your partner having sex with someone else.
most would be angry, some would just let it go,and some would encourage it, how did you find the solution or strength to handle the problem ????
thank you if you reply
Second, angry, hell no. We are more than sex, and there is a zing when I know she has had an encounter. I want her to be happy.
Third, what is there to 'let go'?
Forth, I do encourage.
Fifth, I see no problem. If W enjoys sex, if she wants a guy or two, or lass why not. The only thing I ask, is safe sex.
Quote by Buggered
i would be very interested to hear about how you have handled your partner having sex with someone else.
most would be angry, some would just let it go,and some would encourage it, how did you find the solution or strength to handle the problem ????
thank you if you reply
I'm confused
With swinging, having sex with others is about consent so why would you be angry?
What problem would need a solution?
Maybe it would help if you explained where the questions were coming from or if you have a situation you are unclear on
Hi and welcome to the forums
Sex God
Hi buggered and welcome
Now, swinging is definately a mindset and should be totally agreed upon by both partner before entering into. Anger should be nowhere near it, that surely is as Jaymar says associated with cheating.
Admittedly for some there may be unusual feelings seeing yuor partner with someone else for the first time, but anger no.
pink x
Now, swinging is definately a mindset and should be totally agreed upon by both partner before entering into. Anger should be nowhere near it, that surely is as Jaymar says associated with cheating.
Admittedly for some there may be unusual feelings seeing yuor partner with someone else for the first time, but anger no.
pink x
Quote by Buggered
i would be very interested to hear about how you have handled your partner having sex with someone else.
most would be angry, some would just let it go,and some would encourage it, how did you find the solution or strength to handle the problem ????
thank you if you reply
After talking about swinging for nearly 2 years before we actually joined, the first time was a bit intense. It was Joe who saw me and I could see that he had mixed emotions about it. He wasnt angry at all. Then again he wasnt jumping for joy either. The second time he was a lot more comfortable and got a lot more from the experience than the first. From then on it just gets better and better. No mixed emotions anymore, just very horny thoughts. As with all new ideas, situations, it takes a while to get used to something, especially if it involves the one you love. Well thats the way we are anyway.
Louise xx
Thank you everyone who replied,it was very interesting.
The scenario was that my wife of 30 years had only ever had me, and she wanted to see what it was like with someone else.
So we went ahead, 2 weeks ago and met a well endowed man
We were both very nervous, but D, made us at ease with no pressure.
If we didnt like it, or wanted it to stop he would go with no hard feelings.
The brilliant thing was although my wife loved it,and I felt a bit useless at the time, we learnt from it, and have got stronger from it,as we understand our own, and each others feelings much much more.
Hope that helps someone else somewhere
The scenario was that my wife of 30 years had only ever had me, and she wanted to see what it was like with someone else.
So we went ahead, 2 weeks ago and met a well endowed man
We were both very nervous, but D, made us at ease with no pressure.
If we didnt like it, or wanted it to stop he would go with no hard feelings.
The brilliant thing was although my wife loved it,and I felt a bit useless at the time, we learnt from it, and have got stronger from it,as we understand our own, and each others feelings much much more.
Hope that helps someone else somewhere
Also facinating to see that you love your partners as much as I do and couldnt bear to be without them.
That helped a lot knowing that you can love someone deeply yet still agree to swinging,perhaps I dont particularly like it, which I find frustratingly illogical, but overiding that is I want her to be happy....
That helped a lot knowing that you can love someone deeply yet still agree to swinging,perhaps I dont particularly like it, which I find frustratingly illogical, but overiding that is I want her to be happy....
Quote by Buggered
Also facinating to see that you love your partners as much as I do and couldnt bear to be without them.
That helped a lot knowing that you can love someone deeply yet still agree to swinging,perhaps I dont particularly like it, which I find frustratingly illogical, but overiding that is I want her to be happy....
Personally I find these two paragraphs worrying! If you are only doing it to keep your wife/partner happy then I'd say you are definitely doing it for the wrong reason.
For swinging to work, you BOTH need to be happy and enjoying the situation, any imbalance in that will lead to resentment and ultimately cause problems.
OR maybe you need to rethink the 3somes and start with couples? That way you won't feel so much like "a spare part" your attention will be taken more with what you're doing rather than anything else
.Morbius and I talked about swinging for a long time before we did anything. We have agreed to swing separately on occasions and I will always admit to feeling pangs of jealousy, but he lets me go off as well and prbaby feels the same.
We don't do it to keep the other one happy, we swing, because we feel it adds a dimension to our relationship, and we have excellent trust/openness that allows us to do that.
We just need to do it more often now ;)
Cx
Sex God
Quote by Buggered
Also facinating to see that you love your partners as much as I do and couldnt bear to be without them.
That helped a lot knowing that you can love someone deeply yet still agree to swinging,perhaps I dont particularly like it, which I find frustratingly illogical, but overiding that is I want her to be happy....
But shouldn't that work both ways?
If one of you is doing something that the other's not happy about it's going to cause friction in the relationship.
Sex God
It also states that you are looking for a bi male which does'nt quite fit the question you asked. Are you a reporter?
Thanks yes I thought I was bi as Cds and Ts really turn me on, but being rather fat and ugly I dont turn anyone else on despite being a friendly person, and obviously didnt do much for the person who came to visit us, so I suppose I felt even lower than I did
As for us both being happy with it, I would rather wifey had 100 people and stayed with me for all the other reasons except sex as we still love each other to bits.
Dont get me wrong I can help her to climax 10 -15 times on average most days doing other things,and pressing the right buttons physically and mentally, I seem to be very good at other peoples psychology...except my own
She just wanted a feeling of 'tightness' which a bigger cock gave her for the night-we've now bought big toys so hopefully that will help
As for us both being happy with it, I would rather wifey had 100 people and stayed with me for all the other reasons except sex as we still love each other to bits.
Dont get me wrong I can help her to climax 10 -15 times on average most days doing other things,and pressing the right buttons physically and mentally, I seem to be very good at other peoples psychology...except my own
She just wanted a feeling of 'tightness' which a bigger cock gave her for the night-we've now bought big toys so hopefully that will help
Quote by Buggered
As for us both being happy with it, I would rather wifey had 100 people and stayed with me for all the other reasons except sex as we still love each other to bits.
She just wanted a feeling of 'tightness' which a bigger cock gave her for the night-we've now bought big toys so hopefully that will help
Swinging is about mutual enjoyment as a couple and is an extra to a relationship - not a fix - i would say that if there is any misgivings on either side, it's a recipe for disaster !!!!
I would close your account (i know a lot will disagree), go away, work on your sex life and enjoy the toys
