As a {recently} single female ive wondered about "safe calls"
Its a scary world out there and when a person goes off to meet someone, you never know if they are "normal" for want of a better word.
I cant exactly say to my nilla friends im off to meet some random person{s}
Any suggestions please. dee x
The obvious one, meet in public places, coffee bars, pubs etc, swingers clubs are great but can give the wrong signal to some guys who might think sex is going to be a definite part of the meeting.
some advice found here ............. http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/419555.html
Take woohoo with you, hard as nails and such a gentleman that if he got out of order he would kick his own ass!! :thumbup:
Holy mother of.... I know I was less active on here for part of last year but how the hell did I miss the return of little gem??? :sad:
*EDIT*
Bloke came back (again!!) too, I may take a few days to recover from this.......
There was one time I met with a girl and the first thing she did was take a photo of my number plate and text it to her friend. I thought it was a great idea, and would imagine anyone suspicious would be much more likely to object. For all I know she could have sent it to herself, but how would anyone know?
Safety cuts both ways though, and men should also be careful ... For instance, there was a time in not too distant memory where a girl was so pissed that I decided it wouldn't be a good idea to have sex with her. However, she refused to take no for an answer, locked me in her house and drunkenly pretended to have mislaid her keys ... all while accusing me of being gay and trying to drag me upstairs "just for a cuddle"! I escaped in the end, but not before threatening to call the police or kick her windows in!
The next day I was met with a load of abusive texts accusing me of stealing her laptop ... until sometime later she found it and apologised.
:shock:
one of the best places is McDonalds for a coffee !! There is always one close...its a public place...and its only 10 min cuppa.....so if they are not what you want....no problem....if you think they are nice...then arrange to meet again.....somewhere more appropriate maybe !! Oh and they do a nice muffin as well..lol
If someone's not verified then first meet at a club every time. I have a payg sim that can be changed immediately and have a swinging only email address. Oh and 3 things deliberately wrong in my profile, not by much but enough. Been stalked offline and online (on here on sh and admirably dealt with) so I'm very careful. I also occasionally go to socials as a good way to meet the more genuine peeps. Hth x
The logical thing to do is find someone within our community that you trust and contact them before, during and after a meet. I would suggest that you agree a codeword to say your safe, not a straight forward open text message as anyone would be able to send that if they could use your phone.
Something as plain, boring and simple as 'Ive just put the bins out' could mean your home safe, and only you would know to send that.
Some great ideas in this topic, hope they are helping Dee.
As suggested by others I rely on peoples site rep, profile comments, friends list and their willingness to be open and cam or phone chat very soon after initial contact.
I have never felt afraid for my safety (6ft, slightly crazy look in my eyes and a face that has obviously taken a few whacks - easier targets out there) but I have met a small number of very odd people and felt uncomfortable at times, they are probably typing the same thing about me as we speak :grin:
I wonder if there could be a way to tweak the sites SHRep meeting function to add more details, a trusted friend or even the police to be sent an email or text alert if the meeting is not confirmed as 'concluded safely' by a certain time.....
It could also be good to add 'personal details verified' as well as photo verification to the site, this could be done without anyone one seeing the details in public but would reassure that they have sent proof of ID / Shown photo ID and address details to an OP in chatroom and these are kept on a secure database. Anything which gives people (not just the girls ;) ) more confidence to play in the knowledge they are safe would be good in my opinion.
We also need to try and keep our fears in perspective, you are much more likely to be in an accident, attacked, injured or robbed on the way to a meet than you are by the person you are meeting (depending on the area!), but as with the fear of flying I know statistics are of little comfort to cautious and nervous people!
You are 100% right to make every effort to improve both your safety and peace of mind, if you are ever want my assistance in anything like this Dee then just ask, it would be my pleasure to help xx
:thumbup:
O.K my experiences so far..
1. Do not get pissed and meet a woman selling sex for pleasure on a wintry night when you have left a nightclub. Her male friends showed up and asked me to get into a car - I would not, but they escorted me to a cash machine and I ended up taking £400 out, they said they had a gun!
2. Keep your phone handy - please find a friend, a friend off here or someone in the communinity (or the police?) you can call if things get a little threating. Even if it's your parents (got forbid!) best have someone to call if things get strange.
3. Follow the other advice - meet in a public place first/at a club to prevent it getting strange. Whenever I meet a woman at her own house for a first time meet, I do wonder what she is doing (but that's just me.)
Sorry went of track with my no. 1.
Hi Dee, safety is something which has been mentioned many times in the forum. There are a few simple rules which should always be adhered to.
As mentioned in earlier responses, always meeting in a public place is very useful ... you might wish to check out that there are cctv cameras recording your visit.
Never get into a car without first recording the registration number ... or texting reg. no. to a friend if it's more relevant. As with hotel meets or meets at the other person's home you should also record details, and let the other party know that you're doing so. Never (sounds silly when I say it here) go into a room, address, or vehicle which isn't the one you've recorded details for. You never have to stay .... if you begin to feel uneasy, for whatever reason, probably just trusting your instincts, then leave. You can apologise later, just go.
how very dare you 
