I joined the site a while ago now, and I was looking for a certain thing and found it. Then, as my time on here progressed, the 'thing' I was looking for changed. The more meets I had, the more I sort of changed what I was wanting out of a meet.
Sometimes the thing that changed was me; I decided I wanted to try something new or live out a particular fantasy and I just kind of went in that direction for a bit. I do go through sexual phases.
However sometimes, for me, the bar just gets raised and then ever after any meet is going to have to meet that standard.
What raises the bar for you?
What raises the bar for me is walking away from a meet with a smile on my face.......then getting a text the next day from who ever you met saying they had a good time as well...
Experience and the experiences themselves changed the way I thought about things.
For me, the bar was raised when I'd hit the basement rather than the sky. Almost the opposite of what you're describing Nola.
An incident at a club happened where someone went against my wishes and that was the point that I resolved that I wouldn't ever settle for second best again. Never. And so the bar was raised. Unless there was that relaxed air of quiet confidence and horniness, it wouldn't be happening. Quality over quantity.
I've always thought raising the bar would increase spillages.....seems like a bad idea to me
Yeah. I did a few things, enjoyed some of them, didn't enjoy others, and learned. Most educational were the ones I enjoyed at the time but afterwards felt a bit hollow about. Kind of made me think, is this really how I see myself?
I had one particular experience (not with anyone from SH) where I stayed over at the house of someone who normally charges people. Beforehand, I'd been quite flattered to be getting freebies; I'd met her at a gangbang and she'd told me I could have her whenever I wanted to. Well, great; the sex was great. But her teenage kids were in the house, downstairs, watching TV when I went to make a cup of tea; she was all saying, they're quite comfortable with my lifestyle, but it was quite clear they weren't. I was also pretty sure they thought I was paying to fuck their mum, and I kind of wanted to say "No no I'm not one of those people!" Not that I'm against the concept of people working in or using the sex industry at all, if they're doing it on their own terms: but something about the situation made me not want to be a part of it.
But the worst thing was lying in the bed over night (Christ this has become Tomu confessional here, sorry). It just hit me that I didn't know what to do. I didn't know whether to cuddle up to her or what. I think what I'm trying to say is that without an emotional connection it felt like a lie. I didn't sleep well that night, got up fairly early and got the train home feeling depressed. And came away knowing a bit more about what I like and don't like.
I don't judge here at all for her way of live, each to their own, and she was clearly being honest with everyone and was as in control of her situation as it's possible to be - her own website, choosing her own clients, and all of that. She seemed to be enjoying it, and she was basically a mum doing what she could to provide for her kids. Fine. I don't know whether paying customers ever went back to her house, either.
It didn't help that the whole thing was right after my best friend's funeral so I was feeling pretty messed up anyway, and it was at a time when being single was really starting to bite. The whole thing kind of told me that I really did want to be in love with someone.
(Just, in the perfect world, someone who enjoys being gangbanged).
:lol:
pl who dont fall doon stairs :lol:
