Revenge? What's the best you've given?

7 Nov 2004

They do say that you should turn the other cheek, but that doesn't have the same satisfying feeling of cool, calculated revenge.
What's given you the most pleasure in the "getting your own back" stakes?
I'll kick off.....
I was living with a girlfriend who was always flirting with a local guy who had a rep for putting it about. I knew dammed well that something was going on behind my back but I could never prove it. Me and her had huge rows about me not liking her "friends" (him). After a while I got so pissed off I decided to give them rope to hang themselves. So knowing that he was due to come round to see her one night, I went out. What I didn't tell her was that I'd set the video camera up on a shelf and taped everything they got up to.
The revenge? I showed the tape to his wife who promptly went and knocked ten bales out of him and decked my (by now ex) girlfriend. I also slept with his wife a number of times after that. She was far better in bed than the ex too! biggrin

!

7 Nov 2004

Presenting my x with the bill for the damage to my car ...... he sprayed it with paint stripped and scrawled a naughty word in it ....
but
Twat hadn't thought about witnesses!!!!!!!!!!!
Â£870 of damage done under a restraining order!!!!
Calista xx

7 Nov 2004

Ya gotta love a good restraining order :lol:

7 Nov 2004

Sometimes, the best revenge is none at all. Sure it takes longer and with no real apparent crescendo but, the results are just as satisfying!
I did however hear of a somewhat clever and ingenious revenge plot. I heard it on the radio just after the film, 'The First Wives club' was released.
A woman in her late 40's was recently dumped by her husband of many years. He asked her to move from the family home so he could move his younger new girlfriend in.
She agreed, but before she left, she filled a brass curtain rail full of frozen crab, prawn, and other wonderful smelly seafood stuffs.
Over the course of a few months, she heard through local gossip that the new couple complained of a smell in their home, spending a small fortune in carpet cleaning, fumigating and such and after not being able to relieve their love nest of the stench, decided to sell up and move home........taking the brass curtain rod with them!
Quality!
Silky xxxxxxxxxxx

7 Nov 2004

:P We've done this one before...but I'll play again....
Hair-remover in his shampoo
:thrilled:

7 Nov 2004

Here's one I posted earlier
http://www.swingingheaven.co.uk/swingers-forum/viewtopic/24866.html

7 Nov 2004

Quote by Drifter
Iâ€™ve had a few lively discussions with someone at work over the years regarding work related matters. The person has been rather abrupt during these discussions and on one occasion, even resorted to name calling in an effort to win their argument (which they didnâ€˜t). The person has also been rude to others in my department, including my manager I have always remained calm during these encounters, with the thought that I would someday repay this person in my own time and in my own way. I was happily surprised this week when I discovered the person is shortly to transfer to another department. I eagerly awaited the arrival of the personâ€™s leaving card. It arrived on my desk yesterday and I wrote:-
â€œIâ€™m sure your new colleagues will like you as much as I doâ€
My manager added his comment to the card:-
â€œThe place wonâ€™t be the same without youâ€

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Very cutting lol

....... off to check my old leaving cards now :shock:

8 Nov 2004

i go with the phrase"what goes around comes around"you can wait years,and then all of a sudden the sh*t hits the fan,and they get what they dished themselves,oh sweet world we live in lol

8 Nov 2004

Revenge is a dish best served cold, and we've got a few to deal with over the next few years :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

8 Nov 2004

I butt fucked an ex, with nothing but a little spit and a lot of brute force (and a huge double ender). As he had done the same to me (without the dildo, natch) repeatedly, harshly and despite my screaming into the pillow. I was 17. He was 34. He said the next day, unprompted, "I didn't you up the arse, you know!" Hmmm.... ok, well in that case he didn't do it again, repeatedly over the next few years either. rolleyes

Also, he often said "I wouldn't ask you to do anything I would not do myself" and "I wouldn't ask you to do anything you don't want to do. But if you loved me, you would do anything I asked."
Look I was young, ok?!?
I purposefully made the experience I gave him as horrid as I could. Thinking back, he probably enjoyed it. :roll:
You live, you learn.

8 Nov 2004

a nasty experiance vix,
just remind me never to get on your bad side..

8 Nov 2004

Quote by Vix
I butt fucked an ex, with nothing but a little spit and a lot of brute force (and a huge double ender). As he had done the same to me (without the dildo, natch) repeatedly, harshly and despite my screaming into the pillow. I was 17. He was 34. He said the next day, unprompted, "I didn't you up the arse, you know!" Hmmm.... ok, well in that case he didn't do it again, repeatedly over the next few years either.
Also, he often said "I wouldn't ask you to do anything I would not do myself" and "I wouldn't ask you to do anything you don't want to do. But if you loved me, you would do anything I asked."
Look I was young, ok?!?
I purposefully made the experience I gave him as horrid as I could. Thinking back, he probably enjoyed it. :roll:
You live, you learn.

Hugs Vix ...

8 Nov 2004

I,ve never actually had to get revenge on anyone, but i know some one who found out her partner was cheating on her , so when he was at work she rubbed the inside of his boxers and undies with raw chilli , so when he got hot he really felt the heat :twisted: :twisted: mad

, and a guy who,s girlfriend run off with another guy printed photo,s of her and stuck them on trees around their neighbourhood with a sign saying LOST !! HAS ANYONE SEEN THIS DOG :uhoh: dunno

8 Nov 2004

Oh, almost forgot this......last weekend I was eating toast and my m8 nicked my knobby(end of the bread down here confused

) so to get revenge i left his chainmail top outside in the November air hanging off the fence to 'warm' up ready for our evening out :twisted:
He spanked me afterwards thou :twisted:
am i forgiven yet? lol

8 Nov 2004

like hell u are
genherts cpl that was a naughty trick to play on a little fella
i wouldn't have any problems withsome body grabbing my knobby lol

8 Nov 2004

not really got revenge on anyone up to now but we are considering ways to take revenge upon our neighbours when we move house (soon we hope).The reason for revenge? well they have worked out that we are swingers and like to bandy the info about, plus they have accused me of abusing their children cos they think it might impact upon my career (teacher) but havent the bollox to report us cos they know it isnt true. they also have said that we swingers are all perverts and child abusers! they have told my hubby that i have had affairs with other men up our street (impossible and not true) and called my daughter (12 at the time) a little bitch in the street. the man (and i use the term loosely) has even pushed me about in the off license at the end of our street (witnessed by his sister and caught on the shop's video surveillance). altogether an unpleasant couple! oh and they have the next door but one neighbours in on their little game now and they join in with the general nastiness and name calling. up to now i have simply smiled at them all and know that they will get their just desserts. i am waiting until we know that we are moving or until after we move before i do anything. plenty of time to collect ideas - any suggestions anyone???????

8 Nov 2004

what a horrible vindictive couple you live next too mad

:x :x
rather than do something physical and risk getting yourself in trouble,try the mental approach,the worse thing that could really hurt them would be to see your overjoyed at something,maybe hatch out a plan that you have won the lottery,not the jackpot ,rather the bonus with 5 numbers,usually its about Â£200,000,then go away for a weekend,get some really good friends round to greet you when you come home,you know the scenario big banner out side proclaiming your win,and then have a huge party,it will kill them biggrin

:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

8 Nov 2004

This reminds me of a quote that I have used in the past to stop me doing something really stupid.
I'm a little wounded, but I am not slain;
I will lay me down to bleed a while.
Then I'll rise and fight again.
by John Dryden
Ian

8 Nov 2004

Does anyone remember Simon Mayos Confessions in the late 80's early 90's? They were brilliant and i bought the books, great laugh, lots of ideas in there for you freckledbird, i think i recently got rid of the books, but if i do find them, ill let you have them! :twisted:

8 Nov 2004

hi
ideas got me thinking? placea pebble in a coke can seal end hide it under there car evry time they drive they get knocking sound if hid right could cost few bob looking for it :twisted:
or
stuff large potato into end exhaust pipe so not visible car won,t start or exhaust will blow :twisted:
or
obtain some smoke pellets{used to test flues on gas fires}place under there car watch as they try to put out fire :twisted:
or
get coke can push some 2,1/2 inch nails into sides at diffrent angles place under tyre hopefully in the direction they will move off one new tyre :twisted:
or
as a mate did to guy who nicked his parking space,nipped into halfords bought valve removal tool removed valves from all his wheels :twisted:
:)
its at this point i must add only a bit of fun and in noway condone such behavior ,but you did ask, lol

8 Nov 2004

JohnneUk - you are pure evil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! biggrin

8 Nov 2004

:huh: only if crossed :twisted: :thumbup:

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

8 Nov 2004

Quote by johnneuk1
:huh: only if crossed :twisted: :thumbup:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

I for one will NOT be crossing you! :shock:

8 Nov 2004

Yes they are indeed vindictive and we've had 3 years of putting up with their crap and smiled through it so far, knowing that in the end, we will come out on top (so to speak!). Have no intention of causing any damage that could be classed as criminal, want to go more for the nuisance aspect. that might include the noise making described by could also include smelly problems (has been suggested that we put fish/chicken innards in a bucket and pour resultant liquid down their cellar grate) i love the idea of a party though, would be brill if we could pull off the lottery win thing. anyone wanna attend a swingers/house leaving/piss neighbours off party? lol

:lol:
hee hee
bev

8 Nov 2004

Quote by freckledbird
anyone wanna attend a swingers/house leaving/piss neighbours off party? :lol:
hee hee
bev

Know any police you could invite?? wink

8 Nov 2004

One thing i did consider was applying for a job at the local school. it would have involved teaching their eldest child, can you imagine them having to be civil to me? decided against it because i thought that if they did decide to start spreading rumours about us swinging, i might get the sack anyway. plus, some people might think that 'there's no smoke without fire' (if they made any sort of comment regarding abuse of their child) so it wouldn't really have been fair on the school to involve them in a neighbour dispute - any thoughts?

8 Nov 2004

Revenge...?
Delete and ban usually does the trick for me. wink

8 Nov 2004

Quote by Heather
Revenge...?
Delete and ban usually does the trick for me.

<<slinks back under the covers and wishes he hadn't asked>> :shock:

8 Nov 2004

Know any police you could invite??

ermmmmmmmmmm dunno do i? would love to let em know we were having a swingers party then wait for them to fone the police and see their faces when the coppers recognise a colleague lol

:lol:

8 Nov 2004

Quote by freckledbird
Know any police you could invite??

ermmmmmmmmmm dunno do i? would love to let em know we were having a swingers party then wait for them to fone the police and see their faces when the coppers recognise a colleague lol

:lol:
Or their Chief Constable and his wife biggrin

:D