Hope I don't qualify for the blow job Heather!!!!
Haven't got the equipment but can I donate it to the male of my choice???? 
x xx
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Riddles...
Sex God
Ooh, ooh, I might have to take you up on that offer, Heather :-)
GH from enough
O from women
TI from motion
gives you FISH.
They hadn't invented Google when I learned that at school.
GH from enough
O from women
TI from motion
gives you FISH.
They hadn't invented Google when I learned that at school.
Sex God
Nation, of course. So... no blowjob? Dammit!
Of course, Jags being Jags - a smart cookie if ever I knew one - had to blow the game before I could get the lads on the canvass with it.
But yes... GHOTI is from George Bernard Shaw's alternative English Dictionary which is ten times more entertaining than anything that silly J.K. Rowling woman ever came up with. Ten times more gramatically accurate too!
DJohn... your profile doesn't say where you come from... but nonetheless I've never done back on my word. :twisted: :twisted: Providing a mutually convenient time and place can be arranged, I'll have great pleasure in awarding you your prize.
Hxxx
But yes... GHOTI is from George Bernard Shaw's alternative English Dictionary which is ten times more entertaining than anything that silly J.K. Rowling woman ever came up with. Ten times more gramatically accurate too!
DJohn... your profile doesn't say where you come from... but nonetheless I've never done back on my word. :twisted: :twisted: Providing a mutually convenient time and place can be arranged, I'll have great pleasure in awarding you your prize.
Hxxx
ops: Sorry Heather! Sex God
It does now... but the way work is going this mutually convenient time is likely to be in 2008. Do you have August free that year?
That's alright, Jags, mate. I always knew you'd almost certainly have heard of it before... I was just looking forward to seeing a few of the blokes go purple round the gills trying to figure it out. :lol: :lol:
Here's another one to drive the blokes nuts with.
What object am I describing?
One person makes it then sells it. Another person buys it then gives it to someone else. The person that has it doesn't realise it's theirs...
Hxx
:lol: :lol: Here's another one to drive the blokes nuts with.
What object am I describing?
One person makes it then sells it. Another person buys it then gives it to someone else. The person that has it doesn't realise it's theirs...
Hxx
Sex God
Cruel woman. You want to give me a sleepless night trying to figure this one out, don't you?
A Valentine card? I dunno. I'm going to bed.
A Valentine card? I dunno. I'm going to bed.
Mod
Quote by Heather
Ten times more gramatically accurate too!
Hxxx
Grammatically accurate - contradiction of terms, Heather
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Mal
Alright, alright smarty pants. 
I didn't claim I was perfect anyhows. I'm just a wee silly girlie who hasn't written an international blockbuster.
But did you know, J.K. is now so convinced about her own perfection that she refuses to allow editors to point out her mistakes. Odd that. We all fuck up at times.... unless your name is J.K. Rowling apparently.
Back to my riddle.
Still not figured out the answer, Mal???
Hxx
I didn't claim I was perfect anyhows. I'm just a wee silly girlie who hasn't written an international blockbuster.But did you know, J.K. is now so convinced about her own perfection that she refuses to allow editors to point out her mistakes. Odd that. We all fuck up at times.... unless your name is J.K. Rowling apparently.
Back to my riddle.
Still not figured out the answer, Mal???
Hxx
Mod
Quote by Heather
Alright, alright smarty pants.
But did you know, J.K. is now so convinced about her own perfection that she refuses to allow editors to point out her mistakes. Odd that. We all fuck up at times.... unless your name is J.K. Rowling apparently.
Back to my riddle.
Still not figured out the answer, Mal???
Hxx
Morning World - at a more sensible time than my last reply :crazy:
I'm now giving up my job with the Spelling Police, so Heather and The Kid can relax. I must stop being so anal retentive
I'll give some thought to you last thread later, Heather, when I can think straight :shock:
Mal
We'll take that as a 'I haven't got a clue' then, Mal.
But you see how the subject of spelling and grammer gets people in a muddle? I've known grown adults come to blows over a missing apostrophy.
Of course, we all need to strive to improve... and lets face it a lot of folks (and we see examples of this day after day...) simply don't give a toss. I think we owe it to those folks to tell them their flies are unzipped... At the same time as long as meaning is conveyed accurately there are worse sins against humanity.
But will we ever change them...? Methinks not.
Heatherxxx
And the answer to the riddle is:-
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
A Coffin!!!
Anyone else want to set one?
But you see how the subject of spelling and grammer gets people in a muddle? I've known grown adults come to blows over a missing apostrophy.
Of course, we all need to strive to improve... and lets face it a lot of folks (and we see examples of this day after day...) simply don't give a toss. I think we owe it to those folks to tell them their flies are unzipped... At the same time as long as meaning is conveyed accurately there are worse sins against humanity.
But will we ever change them...? Methinks not.
Heatherxxx
And the answer to the riddle is:-
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
A Coffin!!!
Anyone else want to set one?
Mod
Quote by steve_1
Couple of oldies... both are crossword clues.
1. GGES (9,4)
2. HIJKLMNO (5)
Good luck..
steve
x
Do you know Steve, I thought I knew one :idea: , then when I wrote it down it was bollocks
. I think I need to go and lie down in a darkened room, with a dusky maiden mopping my fevered brow, whilst I proof read Heathers' best selling novel :yawn: Mal
Ps. No, I didn't know yours either Heather
Mod
Kid - you're right
I'm having a bad day :cry: It should be my fault, but I'll think of someone else to blame, then I'll feel better
Mal
:wink:
Quote by mal609
I'm now giving up my job with the Spelling Police
Mal
I'm having a bad day :cry: It should be my fault, but I'll think of someone else to blame, then I'll feel better
Mal
:wink:
Mod
Got it - it's Marks fault
He doesn't have a spell or grammar checker on the site!! :haha:
Sleepy Mal
:yawn:
He doesn't have a spell or grammar checker on the site!! :haha:
Sleepy Mal
:yawn:
:roll: :roll: :roll: :P :roll: :roll: :roll: :P :roll: :roll: :roll:Itt iz veri dishartening four uz krap spelars
I couldn't agree more.... I think
: Did you hear about the bad speller that sold his soul to Santa? Or the T.V. researcher asked to book a famous Rugby player for a chat show and ended up with Joanna Lumley?
Mal... I'm worried about you, Pal. Shall I come up there and mop your fevered brow? I hate to think of your laying on your little couch with semi colons and consonances spinning around in your head.
Heatherxxx
Warming the Bed
OK I can't spell too good and my grammer ain't that good either. Smart ass English students. (God your so superior at times)
Want to try a real problem.
Answers on a post card.
The swinging heaven chat room consists of 4 access ports and the offered trafic intensity is 2 erl.
What is the probability that a connection attempt to logon fails due to blocking?
What is the blocking probability, if the number of ports is increased to 6?
Hint use the Erlang B formula for time blocking probability.
Want to try a real problem.
Answers on a post card.
The swinging heaven chat room consists of 4 access ports and the offered trafic intensity is 2 erl.
What is the probability that a connection attempt to logon fails due to blocking?
What is the blocking probability, if the number of ports is increased to 6?
Hint use the Erlang B formula for time blocking probability.
Answers on a post card.
The swinging heaven chat room consists of 4 access ports and the offered trafic intensity is 2 erl.
What is the probability that a connection attempt to logon fails due to blocking?
What is the blocking probability, if the number of ports is increased to 6?
Hint use the Erlang B formula for time blocking probability.
I was with you right up to the bit about the post card.....I'm not good at spelling, grammar, riddles, OR computers. :cry:
Mind you, this is a sex orientated site! Bloody good job I can shag like Rasputin on Viagra!
lhk
Kat
Ok I got the stuff about the coffin, the screggs and the H2O, but what the hek is the early whirly probibility thingy about?? Give us the formula and THEN we'll try!!
Ok, just coz i'm confuzzed sum1 try this (also an oldie)
It walks on four legs at dawn, two at midday and three at sunset, what is it??
ALSO..
There are two nuns in the bath, one says, 'wears the soap!?, The other says' 'it does doesn't it!?'
ok so its not really a riddle but I like it anyway..
Kute kitty xxx
Ok, just coz i'm confuzzed sum1 try this (also an oldie)
It walks on four legs at dawn, two at midday and three at sunset, what is it??
ALSO..
There are two nuns in the bath, one says, 'wears the soap!?, The other says' 'it does doesn't it!?'
ok so its not really a riddle but I like it anyway..
Kute kitty xxx
Sex God
That's reminds me of the old classic: Did you hear about the dyslexic agnostic insomniac? He'd lie awake at night wondering if there was a dog.
