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Sexual Jealousy

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Picking up a comments made earlier in a few posts, about sexual jealousy within couples that swing..........
Does anyone here feel that before, during or after a meet?
Personally I've only felt it the morning after, I had gone home and a 3some continued without me. :cry:
However, like to hear others views on this subject............
Love and kisses
Claire
In reply to your comments...
Surely there always exists a certain "jealousy" between partners where it comes to a third party, but isn't that a part of what makes it all the more exciting? If you like....a step off into what could be termed, unknown territory.
Yes, sure ok, swinging events are always by mutual consent. Both parties have to want the same/similar things, and the same can be said of dogging, or indeed any agreed sexual activity.
For my part I'd have to say there is always just a hint of jealousy there!
But as an honest opinion, I happen to believe we all crave that little extra from life, and in doing so, to a greater or lessor extent, accept what risks there are involved after doing all possible of course to minimise such risks.
The bottom line of course is never to overstep the boundaries.....
Erm....ok, call me a hard, call me a tart............(quietly tho)
I dont feel jealous watching my other half do whatever he wants with somebody else(s) partner(s).......difficult to complain when you have your mouth full lol
Love and kisses
Claire
xxxx
Ok Claire....I'll whisper it quietly wink
Personally, I think jealousy at missing out on some action sad is different from jealousy during or after your partner has played with someone else. Everyone is a little jealous if they have found out that they have missed out on some action - I certainly am :twisted: - but not everyone is jealous at watching their partner play. If you are an extremely insecure person who is prone to extreme sexual jealousy, it probably goes without saying that swinging is not for you. Even if you fantasise about watching your partner playing with others, it won't work in reality if you are a jealous type - it will eat you up from the inside out (do I sound like Dear Deirdre yet? rolleyes wink ). Having said that, a little bit of jealousy is understandable, especially if you are new to the job or you haven't got set boundaries. The way for swinging to work without serious jealousy is to be HONEST with each other. If, for example, you want to watch your partner play with others but don't want to go so far that they actually shag or be shagged by others, be honest and say so! Jealousy happens when we feel threatened by something or someone - if you respect your own limits and your partners boundaries, jealousy won't happen - in theory at least :roll:
Crikey blue,
That was a bit philosophical!! Mind you, I do agree.
At least I didn't write you all out a reference list confused :shock:
The way for swinging to work without serious jealousy is to be HONEST with each other.
And yourself!
lhk
Kat
Ok, missing out on some action jealous!!!!! Greedy bird that I am............
Love and kisses
Claire
xxx
Yes Blue....
I have to say I can't really find fault with your points of view. However, the fact an individual may retain a little jealousy when seeing their partner on the receiving end of pleasure, doesn't rubber stamp them as "Not suitable to swinging"..... though I'm sure you didn't mean that!
Luckily, we all differ as individuals, (what a sorry world it would be if we didn't!!), and even if not another soul will admit as much, I for one can still feel jealous while watching my partner enduring pleasure...... smile
And I can't say it's an altogether unpleasant feeling...far from it...
Unlike Claire, who feels no such jealous pangs (unless having left an ongoing all night threesome....) I'm not able to comment on a lack of such feelings though I'm sure in either case, each is able to derive pleasure from any given, agreed event....which is after all what most of us are looking for...
No, I didn't mean that! The situations I was talking about are cases of extreme jealousy that individuals have a problem dealing with. Such individuals (in my view) shouldn't swing as it just causes further problems for the relationship (most probably adding to ones already there!), and maybe even violence. I'm no expert on these matters, so just tell me to shut up if I'm wrong!
I didn't for one minute thing you categorised everyone in the same mould, and I did mention as much.....and like you I wouldn't even begin to believe I was an expert on such matters....luckily most of us are able to make judgements for ourselves.......
As for violence!!!!!! mad :x :x Hmmmmmm where's that gun!!!!!!! lol
So, let everyone make their own jdugements - just give me a front-row seat when it all ends in tears :twisted: wink
Hi all, I feel none what so ever when Linda is with a guy, i just love the look on bothe their faces at the pleasure they are both getting from each other.
The look on her face when she has a new guy, wwwooooowwww, as they say in the ad "i'm lovin it".
Mark and Linda
Arguably, jealousy exists in all of us, but our reaction to it varies a great deal. People tend to associate jealousy with anger, or self pity... but for some, it can be a source of pleasure too.
Of ocurse some will say they obtain pleasure purely from seeing their partner obtain pleasure, and jealousy doesn't enter their heads. This is hard to disprove, although some might argue that jealousy exists in this situation and is merely supressed, and ultimately manifests itself in increased arousal (adrenalin surge, emotional reaction unltimately turning to sexual reaction).
In a sense, if people are genuinely trying to enjoy themselves by extending their sexual activities outside of their relationship (by swinging together with other folk) and having the intention of improving the relationship, then that suggests that their partner IS in mind when they are swinging. If they have chosen sexual activity as a means of adding excitement it suggests sex is important to them. So... mix up the fact that sex is important, and your partner is sharing that with another person, if jealousy doesn't exist in that situation then when will it ever?
/The Kid
I'd have to agree with the comments put by the analogkid. One way or another (in my humblest opinion) I happen to believe there is always an underlying jealousy.
It's not a "What the hell are you up too" kind of jealousy, and I guess it's somewhat hard to put into words quite what form the jealousy takes but what the kid suggests by way of an increase in adrenilin is as good a description as I could achieve.....
In any event, Claire started this thread wondering if others experienced this kind of reaction/feeling. I think the answer is yes.......but in very much varying degrees. And as far as I can see, so far none have suggested it gets in the way of the fun......
So here's to whatever floats your boat lol :lol: :lol:
Hi All,
Whatever, when we first experienced a swap, we didn't go all the way. That made us both look forward to the next opportunity. It can only get better!!!!!!
K & T