Situations Vacant!!

18 Aug 2005

Quote by Sgt Bilko
In view of the fact the Mods are so busy at the moment, we have decided to sub-contract some of the daily tasks out to you, the members of the forum.
If you would like to be considered for any of the following positions please submit your application in this thread outlining you previous experience and giving details of why you think you are the best person for the job.
Positions Available
Chief Bottom Smacker
Head Newbie Greeter :welcome:
Head Newbie Frisker :rascal: (for frisking Males)
Head Newbie Frisker :rascal: (for frisking Females)
GFZ Steward(ess) :cheers:
AUP Breaking Bubbler :small-print:
Any other suggested vacancies will be considered!! :? :? :lol: :lol:

Ooooohhhh please may i submit an application for Head Newbie Greeter.....???
I'm Little Miss Sweetness and Light..... do you need to know anything else???????
equi-princess xxx

18 Aug 2005

Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

18 Aug 2005

Quote by tallnhairy
Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

:thumbup:

18 Aug 2005

Quote by tallnhairy
Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

Does mine?

18 Aug 2005

Quote by meat2pleaseu
Hang on guys,
nobodys given me a cuddle, oh prehaps soon lol.
love
lisamarie

get over here woman and brace yourself for a good frisking :rascal:
and wishy, the position of cheif piss taker has been taken flipa

yeh Happy Cats had his name down for that one a LONG time ago :small-print:
yeh i know..... i'm still a wanker
MCB (Tm. M2PU) is just an amater at piss taking, its best left to us professionals.
and your not a wanker, your a cock jockey now
MCB can be used as a locum P.T., but only along the lines of a Magistrate ( unpaid ) - if we have Meat, Wishy, Postie ( when he overcomes his demotion, viz " Party at mine......oh, no there isn't I was pissed " ) and myself.
I would suggest Wishy in overall command, like the Queen with the army ( there, but not actually doing much ), with MCB in the back ground, like an annoying younger brother hopping from one foot to the other trying to join the big boy's gang, with Meat and myself doling out the P.T.-ing in an admirable Free-Market fashion ( whoever wants it, gets it! ) You up for that Meat? But we are not going to get into the question of seniority for this post, are we?

18 Aug 2005

Quote by Sgt Bilko
Positions Available
Chief Bottom Smacker
Head Newbie Greeter :welcome:
Head Newbie Frisker :rascal: (for frisking Males)
Head Newbie Frisker :rascal: (for frisking Females)
GFZ Steward(ess) :cheers:
AUP Breaking Bubbler :small-print:
Any other suggested vacancies will be considered!! :? :? :lol: :lol:

Can I apply for two positions please (always been greedy)?
I would like to apply for the Chief Bottom Smacker :smackbottom: and Head (or even assistant) newbie frisker hump

whoops wrong one should have been :rascal:
I am very quick to learn :grin:

18 Aug 2005

Quote by davej
Sarge can we have someone to check all Avatars to make sure they come within the AUPs please

I dont suppose this job involves meeting the people concerned to verify that all body parts depicted are theirs and not being used under false pretences?
If so I'll volunteer for that one! wink

I can add it to my current two jobs of Jag's Bitch & Official Troublemaker. lol

Roger the Dragon
Just P.M. me for my home address roger, my only request is that you remove your glasses prior to sticking your head up my arse to confirm that it is me.
You've got it wrong Dave - I just have to watch you perform the anatomical impossibility that is your avatar and then tick you as verified.

Quote by Dawn_Mids
Sarge can we have someone to check all Avatars to make sure they come within the AUPs please :dunno:

I dont suppose this job involves meeting the people concerned to verify that all body parts depicted are theirs and not being used under false pretences?
If so I'll volunteer for that one! :wink:
Roger I think you've already done that to me redface

I have a very poor memory - do you fancy volunteering again? :wink:
Roger :lol: :lol:

18 Aug 2005

MMMMMmmmmm
I think I need to apply for inside leg (and other body parts) measurer :lickface:
I'm a very hard and conscientious worker, and a very fast learner!!
When can I start??
Mrs Goodtimez xx

18 Aug 2005

Quote by smokerjim
Hang on guys,
nobodys given me a cuddle, oh prehaps soon lol.
love
lisamarie

get over here woman and brace yourself for a good frisking :rascal:
and wishy, the position of cheif piss taker has been taken flipa

yeh Happy Cats had his name down for that one a LONG time ago :small-print:
yeh i know..... i'm still a wanker
MCB (Tm. M2PU) is just an amater at piss taking, its best left to us professionals.
and your not a wanker, your a cock jockey now
MCB can be used as a locum P.T., but only along the lines of a Magistrate ( unpaid ) - if we have Meat, Wishy,Postie ( when he overcomes his demotion, viz " Party at mine......oh, no there isn't I was pissed " )and myself.

Eh... I was demoted? From the lowly position I was already in? Is it possible? I didn't think i was able to go any lower than the gutter... oh well... i'm calling in the SH Union Rep'..
Whaddya mean we haven't got a SH Union Rep'? We need a Rep'... I spend longer on here than I do at work... my H&S is important.... Right, that's it.. lets get Unionised Brothers and Sisters and stand up to the tyranny of the Mods... no longer shall we toil for hours without a tea-break writing piss taking replies, no longer shall we wear our fingers to nub ends typing grovelling pm's to Mods asking why our threads were locked... let us rise.. like lions, and not live like mice any longer!
Who's with me then.... ????????????? dunno

Don't all rush for the cheese at once!

18 Aug 2005

can we can we
be considered for the Head Newbie Greeter
can we can we lol....... lol

18 Aug 2005

:twisted: I would like to apply for chief bottom smacker :twisted:
If you need a CV I will send it in pm, but I can assure you I am more than qualified cool

18 Aug 2005

I'd like to apply has Flounce Authoriser, you want to flounce, I have to approve.
And my first task on my first day in office will be to pre authorise Meat2puoff

18 Aug 2005

As if I'd grass anyone up, or chastise anyone.
EVER

18 Aug 2005

I have been noting your applications and will post the official titles and successful applicants later.
I have been busy today negotiating a good price for the new uniforms you will need. I hope you approve: confused

:? :? :? :? :? :? :? :?

18 Aug 2005

Dear Sgt Bilko
Chief Bottom Smacker smackbottom

Head Newbie Greeter :welcome:
I would like to official apply for either of the above. The first, Chief Bottom Smacker.......I can safely say I would be very good at having had lots of practice in that area and would find the role challenging and enjoyable. I can work as part of a team or on my own using my own initiative!! wink

With regards the post of Head Newbie Greeter.....I am a friendly person who enjoys to welcome newer newbies than myself with a few encouring words and if they are tasty the odd :wink: :wink: :wink:
I would be grateful if you would consider me for these positions or any other you may feel I could suitably fill!
Yours sincerely
Ms Amber

18 Aug 2005

Please may I have :fuckinghell: the job of telling people :!: who use way to many :undecided: emoticons in there innocent

posts to stop it :jagsatwork: as it's not big :!: and it's not clever :silly: certainly not my thing anyway! cool

Thanks for listening , you are all truly wonderful people worship

18 Aug 2005

Quote by Sgt Bilko
I have been noting your applications and will post the official titles and successful applicants later.
I have been busy today negotiating a good price for the new uniforms you will need. I hope you approve: :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :?

Oh but I had already picked out a great uniform for Mike North PM cool

C'mon Sarge, he'll look brill in it :bounce: aww can we keep it? huh huh? :bounce:

18 Aug 2005

Quote by MISSCHIEF
C'mon Sarge, he'll look brill in it :bounce: aww can we keep it? huh huh? :bounce:

I'm ALWAYS open to suggestions!!! lol

:lol: :lol: :lol: wink

18 Aug 2005

Quote by Sgt Bilko
I'm ALWAYS open to suggestions!!! :lol: :lol: :lol:

That's no isn't it!!! evil

I know it's a no cos I say that sort of thing to my kids to get em off my back - well if you won't budget for one, I'll just have to knit one for him cool

Won't cost a thing then 8-)

18 Aug 2005

Quite like the nice and approachable look:

18 Aug 2005

I seem to recall that you have experience of knitting uniforms, don't you?? confused

:?

:lol: :lol: :lol:

18 Aug 2005

Quote by tallnhairy
Quite like the nice and approachable look:

Good god :scared:
Approachable in the fact that people will have to get bluddy close to yell in yer ear so you can hear em
What job is it that you're taking on? Not one in the SH Library I hope :shock:

18 Aug 2005

Ahh this was just a uniform thing, I expect to see many of SH's finest in similar in a day or so biggrin

Are we allowed paintball guns so we can chase naughty peeps and change colour of postings?

18 Aug 2005

As in football where a yellow card is shown to the miscreant,and then a red should he/she re-offend could the mods institute a disaplinary code of practise whereby an SH offender is put in the stocks, for a period of time depending on the offence as opposed to an all out ban?The rest of us could take the piss out of them as a timely lesson.
Appropriate emoticons would be needed, ie, stocks, rotten fruit throwers, etc...
cc_7up
whip

:twisted:

:giggle:
ps. I realize that this may appeal to some of our sub members! rolleyes

18 Aug 2005

or paintball them... guns when do we get guns... :doh: Sorry, tackleberry moment there...

18 Aug 2005

Quote by tallnhairy
or paintball them... guns when do we get guns... :doh: Sorry, tackleberry moment there...

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
TnH, you're not getting guns! :rotflmao: Can you imagine it in here if everyone had guns

The whole of SH Tower will look like the GFZ after a weekend - within minutes :shock:

19 Aug 2005

Quote by Sgt Bilko
I have been noting your applications and will post the official titles and successful applicants later.
I have been busy today negotiating a good price for the new uniforms you will need. I hope you approve: :? :? :? :? :? :? :? :?

Sarge, they're really great - I'll be putting application in right away (if I haven't already - can't remember?). Shame they couldn't manage to get a shirt with the right collar size for her though!

19 Aug 2005

Quote by freckledbird
Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

Does mine?
hmmmm avatar protection eh Bev :eeek:
does that mean you aren't allowed to nick somebody else's identity? give it back right now

:smackbottom: :smackbottom:

19 Aug 2005

Quote by johneboy
Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

Does mine?
hmmmm avatar protection eh Bev :eeek:
does that mean you aren't allowed to nick somebody else's identity? give it back right now

:smackbottom: :smackbottom:
ahhhh! is someone jealous cos they didn't find the moving avatar, you poor thing
quick, play the 'upset' card and look for an ample chest to cry into

19 Aug 2005

Quote by meat2pleaseu
Hmm, I would like the role of avatar protection, I can ensure they meet the AUP, and also our required level of bounce ;)

Does mine?
hmmmm avatar protection eh Bev :eeek:
does that mean you aren't allowed to nick somebody else's identity? give it back right now

:smackbottom: :smackbottom:
ahhhh! is someone jealous cos they didn't find the moving avatar, you poor thing
quick, play the 'upset' card and look for an ample chest to cry into
Hmmm do we do sympathy now then? lol