I think I've been listening to too much Monty Python recently - specifically the penis song ("isn't it awfully nice to have a penis, isn't it frightfully good to have a dong" etc,etc).
This got me thinking (not generally a good idea, but what the hell), what do you people out there call your bits?
Personally I tend to find myself referring the the 'old man', 'old chap', or my 'tackle' or 'undercarriage' (particularly if I've just caught it on something for some reason).
This also prompted a second question: what's the strangest name you've ever heard somebody else use for their bits?
I can still remember meeting a very odd bloke (ex public schoolboy and trainee RAF officer) who referred to his knob as his 'yoghurt-spitting womb ferret' or his 'porridge cannon'.
Ya know, its a sign of sexual insecurity to give your penis a name - it means you do not see it as part of yourself and detach responsibility for your sexual performance away from yourself.
Apparently!
Scientific bollocks probably!
I don't necessarily mean that you give it a name, I'm merely after the word you use for that particular organ. After all, Ithere aren't many people who used 'penis' or 'vagina' to refer to parts of their own body outside of a medical setting.
Oh, and this thread prompted me to recall a comment a female friend once made concerning a recent conquest:
"He didn't have much of a pork sword, more like a spam dagger"
I call mine Snufflekins, but then I am deranged :silly: :silly: :silly:
When I was a very young boy my gran used to refer to my private's
as a tail.
It was confusing, as at a young age I associated tails
with animals.
The doormen at work call my breasts Emily and Gertrude! No is=dea why, I think they're all mad!
one that always cracks me up is the bowl bugle
Alex Ferguson & David Beckham, take your pick!
we just usually refer to our bits as him and her ... mainly coz she can be wet and he can be hard . when al we wana do is sleep :P
Readers of Private Eye in the late seventies I think, might remember one of their oft-repeated (true) stories of that time. An elderly duke married a much younger woman, and after they returned from their honeymoon, someone overheard asking him how the honeymoon had gone. He said it went quite well, but the only problem was that "Mister Mouse wouldn't come out to play."
Mike.
Brooch and two earrings
Last turkey in the shop
Spam Javelin
probably loads more but I like those best!!!
best (or worst) ive heard for lady bits is 'gateway to her guts' :shock:
my bit is called fred my ex was called wilma (yes we loved the flinstones)
Thanks everyone, some of these are even weirder than I'd ever imagined or come across before.
i used to call my ex's cock Floyd, for resons better known to myself... i dont usually name things but it just seemed apt
anyhoo.. hes gone and so has the name
the other halfs has no name but hates being called a pussy ...
:lol: :lol: 
:dunno:
ops: :oops: :oops: