Your presence on here is not weird and I think the evidence is already recorded here to dispel that. It could, however, lead to crap and trouble. What you'll have to remind your friend is that you are a wonderful, well balanced person and you will not let the crap and trouble happen to you. It is your qualities, which I'm sure your friend knows only too well, that will stop that happening - that and the fact that you have told her about SH and she's free to see how you treat and are treated on here - with love and respect.
Additional comment - I think Shireen is right that your friend may not be ready to accept the message I was promulgating.
Keep calm.
Don't drink too much.
Try and hear what she has to say.
Respectfully ask her to offer you the same courtesy.
Come back here and tell us all about it.
Get down to Somerset and let us make things all better.
I'm speaking from the heart.
Recently, I told my best friend about swinging.
I was lucky in that she accepted it. I didn't take it lying down though. I wrote down a list of questions she might ask me and I answered them all quite clearly in my own way (this was before I ever broached her about the subject). She asked me most of the questions of my list and I can say that I am lucky to have an understanding friend but I appreciate that it could have been so much the other way so the only advice I can give is be prepared for a lot of questions.
I hope for you that everything turns out well, best friends are everything!
:therethere:
Hire a nuns costume , a serious one not one with the back missing!!!
Sit down and say , "well i listened to what you said before and ive taken advice, i will never have sex with anyone ever again (keep your fac straight) Now let me talk to you about God..........................." Hopefully this will so shock her that she will be begging you to swiing!!!
On amore serious note , good luck!!
Good luck with it Rainbows - true best mates are hard to come by but once you get them, they are truly the best. My advice (for what it's worth - and you may think it's not worth much) is to try and not be too on the defensive. You have nothing to defend... Ask your best mate to tell you what their true concerns and accept that as a mate this behaviour may be just down to wanting to make sure "you're ok". Don't lose a great friend but don't give up the things you love either... Hope it goes ok xx
Like some of the others had said.....she needs to do a little more research into the scene to lay judgement on be honest why you need to meet up with her to explain yourself i just don't understand,your a big girl and you know what your she logged onto this forum she may have a better understanding of the prople that use it,maybe try that some time with her.
What does your partner think of the issue? Perhaps it would be beneficial for him/her to tag along and discuss the matter openly as a couple, with your friend. Justify your lifestyle together (Not that you should have to)
Or could it be that your partner isn't involved and your friends a friend to both you and your partner..and doesnt want to see them hurt?
Sorry if this isn't relevant as haven't the background info on it as couldn't open your previous topic thread.
True friends will be there for you no matter what your beliefs/opinions are. Good luck.
Some people can accept things easily, others take more time. Some people will never be persuaded to change their view on life.
Your friend sounds as though she either wants to understand or to try to change your view. If you stick to your guns I would guess she will eventually accept it, even though swinging may never be her cup of tea, It sounds as though she cares.
As an example, I might say –
I enjoy the swinging community, the people, and I enjoy the sexual experiences it brings. The people I mix with are no different to any other group of people, their morals and outlook on life are probably the same. The only difference may be their attitude towards sex. Perhaps they are more liberal and comfortable with it and their partners. Respect, safety and discretion are just as important to most of them as it is to most of the rest of society.
I don’t just have sex with anyone, only the ones that I like, feel comfortable with and trust. No different to real life. The website I use gives me the opportunity to find that out before I commit myself to anything. No different to meeting someone in the shop, pub, work etc, talking with them, going out with them and then perhaps having sex with them.
Being a swinger doesn’t mean that all we think about or do is sex. It is an interest, a hobby or a way of life no different than if I liked pottering around with cars, attended races and bought the magazines. Its not the only thing in my life, its not a disease that infiltrates everything I do or the way I think. I am not on a crusade, you are safe, you don’t have to lock up your children or hide your partner.
I was swinging a month ago, you didn’t know and we were the best of friends. Did you have any reason to be worried for me then, did I appear anything other than the way I always have?
Please open your mind and think about it before finalising your opinion of me
i dont really see how it effects your friendship, its like telling her your gay, well sort of!!
If she gets all high and mighty, be proud of what your doing and if she cant handle it, then maybe you should be the one who decides if the friendship carries on.
The worse thing you could do is be all shy and apologetic about it, she'll pounce on that, say this is what i do, i enjoy it and do you still want to go for a beer next tuesday or not?
Try having a laugh about it.....see the funny side and maybe open her eyes abit..
:bounce: I love good news :bounce:
Lucky you, rainbow, my sister and I are not talking anymore because she says I am hanginging out with wierdos, misfits, perverts and child molesters, but fuck her, she is the one with the problem not me