Hi, we are newbies in need of guidance! Hope you can help us out.
Several times now S & I have met up with men and for one reason or another things haven't clicked into place for S to want to sleep with them/have a threesome. Which is absolutely fine, and I supported her decision perfectly in each instance. But when all she really wants is a hard session, and we've been trying to sort the perfect meeting for so long, what are we doing wrong!!? I'm sure this has happened far too many times to lots of people, but I'm now starting to think hiring an escort or contacting one of many porn sites with guys that S really wants to be fucked by, is an easier solution than advertising in small ads.
Sadly it's a one-to-one (or one-to-two) thing we're after, swinging clubs don't interest us. We don't just use this site to try and find blokes, small ads on other sites have failed dismally too. Obviously the amount of men who respond to the ads isn't the problem - it's the quality. Sorting the wheat from the chaff takes long enough, but then to find one that we feel safe enough to meet means others may have slipped the net by the time we realise that ones a bloody weirdo ;) & then of course when you meet one - there's the risk that things just don't happen for either party - which has sadly been true on a couple of occassions. So - is it just a case of working harder at a method of sorting, or are we missing something to make the whole process easier.
Cheers,
C.
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Quote by Tosh
Hi, we are newbies in need of guidance! Hope you can help us out.
........ but then to find one that we feel safe enough to meet means others may have slipped the net by the time we realise that ones a bloody weirdo ;) & then of course when you meet one - there's the risk that things just don't happen for either party - which has sadly been true on a couple of occassions.
Cheers,
C.
We (well more me, the fem) ended up in a similar mindset when we joined this site. Put an ad up, then once we started getting replies, they were either not what we were looking for or I got the "but what if they are axe murderers" heebie jeebies and everyone got a polite no thank you and removed the ad.
We then got into the social side of the site, went to a Munch and met people in a neutral environment on purely social grounds....... although they could still be axe murderers, I felt more comfortable seeing how people interacted with others (without the expectations involved in meeting people from ads in the pub first, to find out compatibility). This then allowed us to build up a rapport with people and then arrange meets in the future.
Les x
Sex God
You said you are a newbie yet it says you joined Sept 2004 
FIRE xx
FIRE xx
Firelizard - exactly! We've been on the site that long and yes it's got in and out of priority, but it's always something we talk about.
It's a good point about the munches - but I understand that does mean socialising ;) and we're miserable gits! We'd just rather find our own fun without getting too much into the social scene of swinging. (not that this has got us far!)
It's a good point about the munches - but I understand that does mean socialising ;) and we're miserable gits! We'd just rather find our own fun without getting too much into the social scene of swinging. (not that this has got us far!)
Quote by Tosh
Firelizard - exactly! We've been on the site that long and yes it's got in and out of priority, but it's always something we talk about.
It's a good point about the munches - but I understand that does mean socialising ;) and we're miserable gits! We'd just rather find our own fun without getting too much into the social scene of swinging. (not that this has got us far!)
From the sounds of it - you're looking for a purely physical experience, preferably with an adonis, as opposed to someone who is into the swinging 'lifestyle' but may look slightly more average?
If that's the case, if it is just looks and physical contact you're after - then I would say go for an escort. That way you can browse the ads or whatever they have, choose your ideal bed buddy, book him and go for it
What I don't like about that concept tho, is that it's a job to him, not necesarily pleasure. Personally I find it essential that anyone I play with is doing so because they 'want' to, because hopefully they're gonna have, not only as much pleasure as me, but thoroughy enjoy giving it too.
With the escort thing, you get the body and that's it. Perfect if that's exactly what you're after, no small talk etc, just receiving pure physical pleasure from someone you've picked out :D
Quote by Missy
From the sounds of it - you're looking for a purely physical experience, preferably with an adonis, as opposed to someone who is into the swinging 'lifestyle' but may look slightly more average?
now that i can do ............
obvoiusly Tosh and Mrs Tosh youre gonna think im taking the piss.... however on this occasion im serious.......
perhaps youll get in touch....
Warming the Bed
Have to say I`ve had a great time since joining. :D :D
Took a few e-mails initially ( bout 40 of `em) but recently :happy:
I`ve found it helps to actually chat on the `phone, you get more of a sense of who somebody is, ( although that`s not fool-proof, met a very nice looking, ( albeit from behind ), and sounding lass. She turned out to have really hairy ears, we`re talking veritable forests. :shock: :shock: :shock:
Now I don`t mean to be picky but....
Hang in there dude, as they say at Kirby, " every no is 1 step closer to a yes"
:D :D Took a few e-mails initially ( bout 40 of `em) but recently :happy:
I`ve found it helps to actually chat on the `phone, you get more of a sense of who somebody is, ( although that`s not fool-proof, met a very nice looking, ( albeit from behind ), and sounding lass. She turned out to have really hairy ears, we`re talking veritable forests. :shock: :shock: :shock:
Now I don`t mean to be picky but....
Hang in there dude, as they say at Kirby, " every no is 1 step closer to a yes"
Quote by Missy
Firelizard - exactly! We've been on the site that long and yes it's got in and out of priority, but it's always something we talk about.
It's a good point about the munches - but I understand that does mean socialising ;) and we're miserable gits! We'd just rather find our own fun without getting too much into the social scene of swinging. (not that this has got us far!)
From the sounds of it - you're looking for a purely physical experience, preferably with an adonis, as opposed to someone who is into the swinging 'lifestyle' but may look slightly more average?
If that's the case, if it is just looks and physical contact you're after - then I would say go for an escort. That way you can browse the ads or whatever they have, choose your ideal bed buddy, book him and go for it
What I don't like about that concept tho, is that it's a job to him, not necesarily pleasure. Personally I find it essential that anyone I play with is doing so because they 'want' to, because hopefully they're gonna have, not only as much pleasure as me, but thoroughy enjoy giving it too.
With the escort thing, you get the body and that's it. Perfect if that's exactly what you're after, no small talk etc, just receiving pure physical pleasure from someone you've picked out :D
As it happens, them being Adonis's (? or is it Adonisi) isn't important. S just wants someone she feels that instant sexual spark with. They'll have to be quite young and fit to keep up with her though :twisted: We've met one guy who was no oil painting, but was dirty as fuck and we were all set, but sadly things didn't work out on the feeling safe front.. and we decided to exit stage left.
TBH, the escort type fuck em and chuck em experience is kind of what we're after, but the sparky, flirty conversation must be there. Whatever, vacuous aren't we
I've got to say too, it isn't important whether the person in question really enjoys themselves, it's about our pleasure. I would be incredibly surprised if they didn't enjoy themselves in the process though!Thanks, and anyone else who wants to stick their oar in anyway they want, please go ahead, we're out of ideas :D
Sex God
Quote by Tosh
TBH, the escort type fuck em and chuck em experience is kind of what we're after, but the sparky, flirty conversation must be there.
Well if that's what you're looking for then go for it, and decent escort will be able to create that sparky flirty conversation that your looking for with no problem at all as any successful escort is the type of person that can naturally put people at ease in a situation and create a positive atmosphere. One thing to remember though is that although you are paying the escort for them to pleasure you they are actually the one who is in control of the situation and won't definately do everything you want them to. In the same way as it is with swinging its important to respect the other persons boundries and so you need to discuss what you want from the time you are planning on spending with them before you book them to ensure they are comfortable with what you want.
