At the risk of sounding like complete noobs, we were wondering if anyone could give us some advice about the correct way to approach going to a swingers club. We've read several pages on the net about it but it'd be nice to hear about some personal experiences and gain some advice.
Thanks!!!
T & L x
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Swing Clubs - How to Approach?
Quote by 3someinpreston
At the risk of sounding like complete noobs, we were wondering if anyone could give us some advice about the correct way to approach going to a swingers club. We've read several pages on the net about it but it'd be nice to hear about some personal experiences and gain some advice.
Thanks!!!
T & L x
To be honest you would approach it like any other club really
Quote by 3someinpreston
its different from any other club because you know what to expect in a normal club! We're just being paranoid noobs lol!
we're looking for uninhibited fun basically! just need to pluck up our combined courage!!!
Ok but to be honest some clubs are just like night clubs. They have a dance floor,bar etc The only difference is that they have rooms where you can play. Some clubs are different as they have jacuzzis etc and you have to wander round in a towel or undies. Check with club what their dress policy is before you go. There is no need to be stressed about going. I have found most clubs really chilled and friendly and remember you never have to do anything you don't want to.
once you get inside you`ll be suprised how at ease you`ll feel. They tend to be friendly, places and generally non pushy. Dont go with any pre conceptions or expectations and you`ll be fine. If you have limits or boundries then make sure your both clear and fine with each other about them and make them clear to anyone you may wish to play with. Always respect other peoples boundries too and you wont go far wrong. If you have any specifics then feel free to pm us and we`ll be happy to (try) and answer them. Dino 
I think the best thing you can do is go to the clubs and parties section and have a read thro other peoples comments of verious clubs, all clubs are different some are disco based, some are health club-ish based, depends what your after, some people like to get glammed up and strut their stuff, some like to relax, have a jacuzzi, sauna etc
But as others have said just be yourself and always remember nothing is expected of you once you are inside you ALWAYS have the rights to say no, all because you are in a swingers club that DOSE NOT make you a free for all to any man who wants to touch you, i say that because i have had so many new women say they went to a club and didn't know if it was the done thing to say no and had gone with men they didn't really want to cause they felt it was expected of them
But as others have said just be yourself and always remember nothing is expected of you once you are inside you ALWAYS have the rights to say no, all because you are in a swingers club that DOSE NOT make you a free for all to any man who wants to touch you, i say that because i have had so many new women say they went to a club and didn't know if it was the done thing to say no and had gone with men they didn't really want to cause they felt it was expected of them
I hope you have fun in any club your thinking of visiting. and they can be very addictive. well can be just make sure you have your boundrys set before you go in. i had to fight my way out of a club once when an angry women started to fight with her partner just coz he sukked somones nipple lol 
we think a more relaxed, clean atmosphere is more our "thang" lol.
thankfully we're not a silly couple - we know what we want and what we don't - but it is an intimidation factor in being seen as "outsiders" so to speak, although we are confident by nature. it's just nice to know what to expect!
T & L xxx
thankfully we're not a silly couple - we know what we want and what we don't - but it is an intimidation factor in being seen as "outsiders" so to speak, although we are confident by nature. it's just nice to know what to expect!
T & L xxx
Sex God
just march st8 in and>>>>>>>>> sit like twats lol thats what we did 1st time lol,yes know what you mean we felt crap but just try to mix in and talk to cpls or who ever your looking for .treat it as a normal night as most clubs have a social area ,any way we going to partners friday so if anys ones going ( we are the twats in the corner) gisa a shout 
Quote by 3someinpreston
At the risk of sounding like complete noobs, we were wondering if anyone could give us some advice about the correct way to approach going to a swingers club. We've read several pages on the net about it but it'd be nice to hear about some personal experiences and gain some advice.
Thanks!!!
T & L x
avoid the back passage unless you have permission to go in there that way, it is quite different that way and not everybody likes it, most prefer the front route of approach push open the flap like doors and ease your way in cautiously, if you cant get in staright away it means you may have to push some buttons or pull on the knob to get their attention, but when your in you will enjoy it, try not to pull out and leave too quickly as people will think your selfish, take your time and mix it up a little while you explore every dark hole before using the back passage for your exit after leaving a deposit for a good night lol
yes here's a few bits of advice
research the club first and make sure it caters for your needs
if they ask for large quantities of money for membership then lookout because they're not likely to be there next week
do not think high membership fees mean good clubs ''they'd just mean high fees''
any well-established club will allow you to look round first
if you are trying to assess the club always stay to the end of the evening lot of clubs don't get going to the end
and if you go on a quiet night ''try again'' because it's difficult to get a true valuation in one visit
and last but not least try not to have any preset ideas about what going to happen take it as it comes..... no joke intended..
research the club first and make sure it caters for your needs
if they ask for large quantities of money for membership then lookout because they're not likely to be there next week
do not think high membership fees mean good clubs ''they'd just mean high fees''
any well-established club will allow you to look round first
if you are trying to assess the club always stay to the end of the evening lot of clubs don't get going to the end
and if you go on a quiet night ''try again'' because it's difficult to get a true valuation in one visit
and last but not least try not to have any preset ideas about what going to happen take it as it comes..... no joke intended..
I'm sure the best advice has already been given by lots of more experienced clubbers on this and other threads, but in case a few more words of encouragement can help -
The biggest hurdle I think is maybe going in the front door. Once you're there, you can find a place (the bar, lounge, wherever) to chill out and get a few breaths. When you're ready, catch someone's eye and strike up conversation the same as you would anywhere else (or in SH). Several clubs (like Partners) have got 'guides' on their websites which include plenty of helpful advice (eg 'Use being new to your advantage - say to someone you're new and what do they think of the club or ask them to show you round'). I always like phoning a new club and chatting to the staff for a few minutes before going the first time too. If you've done the in-depth conversation with each other about what your limits are, just keep each other up to date - remember it's your shared experience that counts, same as if you were going for a night out anywhere else (ie don't go surprising each other unless you're very sure). If you've got special limits or preferences in mind and you go off for a private session you might want to mention these to your new-found friends beforehand. Have a great time - and if you don't do anything on your first visit except chat at the bar or strip off in the jacuzzi there's no big deal. Clubs vary a lot and so do experiences, but mostly they're pretty nice places.
The general expectation of group activity I think, at least in clubs, is that it is purely physical - ie unequivocally casual, without strings or phone numbers. Gentle, respectful, tender, whatever is unanimously enjoyed - but afterwards you generally go back to simple politeness with new friends quite quickly and without showing undue lingering interest. (A great time for sweet nothings and can't-wait-to-be-alone-with-yous with your main partner.)
xx Chris
ps We're going to Partners (or poss Cupids) Fri/Sat 22nd/23rd July so you're welcome to say hi to us if you want to (this is a social invite - no implications - and same invite to anyone other SH'ers who's around greater Manchester and clubbing that weekend). A few of us were going to make it an intro weekend for new clubbers but the main interest has been from people who already go clubbing anyway!
The biggest hurdle I think is maybe going in the front door. Once you're there, you can find a place (the bar, lounge, wherever) to chill out and get a few breaths. When you're ready, catch someone's eye and strike up conversation the same as you would anywhere else (or in SH). Several clubs (like Partners) have got 'guides' on their websites which include plenty of helpful advice (eg 'Use being new to your advantage - say to someone you're new and what do they think of the club or ask them to show you round'). I always like phoning a new club and chatting to the staff for a few minutes before going the first time too. If you've done the in-depth conversation with each other about what your limits are, just keep each other up to date - remember it's your shared experience that counts, same as if you were going for a night out anywhere else (ie don't go surprising each other unless you're very sure). If you've got special limits or preferences in mind and you go off for a private session you might want to mention these to your new-found friends beforehand. Have a great time - and if you don't do anything on your first visit except chat at the bar or strip off in the jacuzzi there's no big deal. Clubs vary a lot and so do experiences, but mostly they're pretty nice places.
The general expectation of group activity I think, at least in clubs, is that it is purely physical - ie unequivocally casual, without strings or phone numbers. Gentle, respectful, tender, whatever is unanimously enjoyed - but afterwards you generally go back to simple politeness with new friends quite quickly and without showing undue lingering interest. (A great time for sweet nothings and can't-wait-to-be-alone-with-yous with your main partner.)
xx Chris
ps We're going to Partners (or poss Cupids) Fri/Sat 22nd/23rd July so you're welcome to say hi to us if you want to (this is a social invite - no implications - and same invite to anyone other SH'ers who's around greater Manchester and clubbing that weekend). A few of us were going to make it an intro weekend for new clubbers but the main interest has been from people who already go clubbing anyway!
Thanks everyone for the advice! We're probably going to go to a club in the very near future and it's great to hear testimony from people who know what they're talking about. The only problem is we're gonna have to go as far afield as Blackpool or Manchester... ah well!
So thanks everyone!
So thanks everyone!
Sex God
Quote by 3someinpreston
At the risk of sounding like complete noobs, we were wondering if anyone could give us some advice about the correct way to approach going to a swingers club.T & L x
Sidle in quickly through the door while nobody is looking!
But seriously, all the advice above is good - I'm another one who can confirm that after you've been in the club for a very short time, you will feel so relaxed that you will wonder why you were worried!
Good luck,
Mike.
Quote by bigslut
do not think high membership fees mean good clubs ''they'd just mean high fees''
any well-established club will allow you to look round first
if you are trying to assess the club always stay to the end of the evening lot of clubs don't get going to the end
and if you go on a quiet night ''try again'' because it's difficult to get a true valuation in one visit
and last but not least try not to have any preset ideas about what going to happen take it as it comes..... no joke intended..
Excellent advice from BigSlut there - I've only had good experiences, but I remember a friend being almost put off the clubbing scene cos when they got there (think it was in the North West somewhere) it was a dirty run down pub with a few mattresses thrown on the floor - eugh!
Most places have spent on bomb on making it lovely but you can't beat having a look around (or, if you're travelling, checking the pictures on the website at least).
Quote by cc_7up
I think the best thing you can do is go to the clubs and parties section and have a read thro other peoples comments of verious clubs,
How come the comments are quite old? How often are they updated?
cc_7up
AFAIK they stopped updating them and hoped there was going to be a dedicated thread. The peeps running the site are human too and have jobs. Maybe us posters could organsie it, or someone start a related usenet group even?
