Swingers as friends?

18 Apr 2004

Just wondering how much importance people put on making good friends from swinging?
It might be that the swinging is the be all and end all of it for you or maybe you think like us and have to become good friends before things can progress.
Anyway let us know would love to hear what poeple think.

18 Apr 2004

I think as friends it is more relaxing, more pleasurable and none of the worries you have as strangers. Inbetween talk and chats are more fun, and offers a good feel factor. Quick meets are ok, but lack sometimes the memorable factors, but some like that approach and it depends on your own likes? Friends will always be their, and can be reunited, whilst strangers may never cross your path again, and as friends you can carry on the fun in pm's!

18 Apr 2004

Well both me and the missus think that becoming good friends is most important for us to progress and have truely good swinging experiences,especially with really great folks like you too. biggrin

We know that u allready know our views but we could'nt help but reply to your post.
Love Clare and Steve,xxxxxxxxx wink

18 Apr 2004

Now I'm not really qualified to answer this one (but that's never stopped me before so...). I'm not qualified because I've not yet managed to persuade Mrs TE to take the plunge and I'm not in to doing anything without her BUT one of the reasons she is wary of Swinging is that she's afraid that we might become too friendly if you know what I mean :!: I know this is a security/confidence issue so I'm a bit wary of admitting it, but I think it is fairly fundamental.
So I'm not sure. Obviously you'd have to be comfortable with whoever is participating but becoming hard and fast friends may not produce the outcome you expect. This is rather a difficult subject to raise here but it is an issue for Swingers, I think.
Any body got any advice confused

: :?:

18 Apr 2004

Excuse me - this is important :!: :!:
Up to the top of the pile you go. Mollyand chris well done for raising this.

18 Apr 2004

I have made many friends on here and 'swung' with some of them. The friendship part of the package is possibly the most important part for me. We can relax more when we meet. We can have a laugh. We enjoy each others company and this makes the whole time much more fun. It's more relaxing, there is no tension about anything, if we decide not to do anything, no-one feels hurt or offended. there is no 'green-eyed monster' lurking anywhere, because we are friends - and that's what counts most for me.
Mal
lol

18 Apr 2004

Quote by mal609
The friendship part of the package is possibly the most important part for me. ...... this makes the whole time much more fun. .......there is no 'green-eyed monster' lurking anywhere, because we are friends - and that's what counts most for me.
Mal

This is a very persuasive argument but you'll have to admit it is from the single man's point of view. Would it be so clear from a couples point of view when one partner has something to lose confused

: As I say it is a security thing.

18 Apr 2004

Friends are always important , possibly the most important aspect of anyones life . People you swing with often arent..........when they are both then thats great :-)

18 Apr 2004

Quote by Silk and Big G
Friends are always important , possibly the most important aspect of anyones life . People you swing with often arent..........when they are both then thats great :-)

Sounds very pragmatic that - thanks.
Love the website - you should flaunt it more :!: :!:

18 Apr 2004

Pragmatism , much like colostomy isnt really my bag , so i must have just slipped into it inadvertantly .
Thanks for the compliments , we try hard to make the site fun and interesting , not sure how we'd flaunt it any more than we already do .

22 Apr 2004

We feel that we have possibly found the only swinging couple out there who are completely perfect for us,as in they are just as important as friends as sexual relations.
Were sure that we will find other couples who we both get along with and can swing with,but the couple we have only recently met seem like friends weve known for us this makes them priceless!

22 Apr 2004

We much prefer the friendship side of things, we didnt join just for a shag, we joined cos we also wanted to find some local friends we could maybe go out for a few drinks, or a meal and stuff with. We always say that we like to have a drink or meal first, rather than just meet somewhere and rip each others clothes off, lol!!

22 Apr 2004

I don't intentionally look for friends whilst swinging, but sometimes it happens. I met a bloke a few years ago on the Internet, pre-Swinging Heaven (was there really life before SH? :shock: ), who I still go clubbing with regularly and we are good friends. I've met plenty of people off here, most of whom I've never had sex with - some of those I consider very good friends. However, much of the time when I swing I intentionally look for strangers. The vast majority of blokes I've swung with, either at private meets, in clubs, or outdoors, have been one-offs and I wouldn't know any of them again even if they fell on me (I don't look at faces :shock: wink

). There is a certain buzz about sex with strangers, which I fully intend to have tonight :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:

22 Apr 2004

Quote by clarensteve_lincs_69796
We feel that we have possibly found the only swinging couple out there who are completely perfect for us,as in they are just as important as friends as sexual relations.
Were sure that we will find other couples who we both get along with and can swing with,but the couple we have only recently met seem like friends weve known for us this makes them priceless!

Thats probably the sweetest thing anyones ever said to us and the feeling is completley mutual (the last two must have been bad though lol)

22 Apr 2004

Ok, so we know you guys get on, but can we PLEASE stop with the mutual admiration society??? lol

You're making the rest of us feel sick, lol!!
Only joking, well done on having so much fun!! wink

22 Apr 2004

Sorry dazandlou but we never in a million years thought that we could find another couple so well suited for us.
Has any other couples been through this kind of thing,and is it good or can it cause certainly hope that its a good thing!!!

22 Apr 2004

The people we swing with are close friends. The ones we don't swing with anymore are still close friends. It is one of the most important things to us. We have weekends that we spend with our ex swinging partners and I consider the females to be some of my closest friends.
For us it is not all about the sex. We want to have some sort of a social life with these people. We don't want to meet, play and then say goodbye. We want to be able to talk about all sorts, enjoy a drink together etc etc.
We have always said that the friendship comes first and if there is a problem with the swinging together then it stops but the friendship continues. This has worked great so far.
Love
Wilma
x x x x

22 Apr 2004

My swinging partner is my best friend... and I really don't think we could have been seeing each other regularly for seven years unless we clicked on a friendship level.
I've also met some very good friends via SH... but these are friends that I've developed over months. The 1-2-1 one meet only shags are getting me down, now... I must prefer getting to know peeps BEFORE I screw there bottoms off! :twisted:
Jxx

23 Apr 2004

I agree,
I think that by becoming friends it can add to the overall experience, and stop it being "businessey"
Thrax
smile

23 Apr 2004

Can I add my 2 pence worth in here, from the 'single guy' perspective...
(OK, OK...who threw that??!! I know 'single guy' is becoming a dirty word but there was no need to throw fruit at me! ...and still in the tin too. :cry: )
Seriously though. I haven't got as many miles under my belt as some, but of the 3 couples I've met over the last 6 months or so 2 of them I would know consider friends. We meet whenever we're all free and sometimes just myself and the lady meet up (with the partners permission) and I think this demonstrates how comfortable we all are with each other. This can only happen with trust and friendship (unless you're just really lucky!!!)
These friendships make for a far more pleasurable experience all round and doesn't at all detract from the initial excitement of having sex with someone new. The interludes between sweaty seesions become a nice break, not an awkward silence.
I'd now consider it to be a huge part of my swinging/dogging lifestyle and look to make friends FIRST with people where possible, (sometimes you can't help but to just whip your kit of though! :twisted: ).
As for the other couple, after a few hours in the pub and then a trip to a secluded spot, they never got back in touch... maybe it was my aftershave???

24 Apr 2004

Heather, i would rather you left my bottom alone, but how bout a really good girls night out?? Since we live probaly within about a mile of each other, lol!! smile

And, so as not to hijack the thread (cos it really irritates us when that happens... cool

)
we still would rather meet people and do nothing sexual, but find some great friends!! (Sex is just a bonus, lol!! redface

)

26 Apr 2004

Making friends is all part of it. In many ways it's pretty easy as you're likeminded, which is pretty cool.
Sometimes the friendship thing can outweigh the swinging. For example I met a really nice lady from north Notts and we had a great time together. But since then we've lost touch (her personal circumstances have changed I guess) which is cool except I wish we could have still kept in touch as friends....we had some good heart to heart talks about life in a so called space age.