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The truth about Santa!!!

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Santa Facts
No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organism yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn't (appear to) handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - or 378 million according to the Population Reference Bureau. At an average (cencus) rate of 3.5 children per household, that is 91.8 millions homes. One presumes there's at least one "good" child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels East to West (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each one of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around thwe earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but for the purpose of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75 and a half million miles, NOT counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding etc. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purpose of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego Set (2 lbs), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On landing, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 330 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point 1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine reindeer. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload, not even counting the weight of the sleigh, to 353,430 tons! Again for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth!
353,430 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as space craft re-entering the earths atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of enery ... per second ... EACH! In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and creating deafening Sonic Booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vapourized within thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subject to centrifugal forces 17, times greater than gravity. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrosly slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve ...
he's dead now :-)
Where the hell did you dig that lot up from???? biggrin rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
You just had to go and ruin it for me! :cry:
ahhhhhhhhhhh...........but santa can freeze time,and you forget,he uses magic biggrin
so is it safe to say that you don't believe in Santa then, Ian?
Quote by hornyred and dino
Where the hell did you dig that lot up from???? biggrin rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

i have too much time on my hands
Quote by da69ve
You just had to go and ruin it for me! icon_

this isn't my personal belief just an alternative theory but ya gotta admit it's a good argument against the existence of santa
Quote by freckledbird
so is it safe to say that you don't believe in Santa then, Ian?

no not at all. i truly believe that the realms of fantasy are the ultimate place to be. i also think that wewantu2 have it all summed up perfectly lol
Quote by iain_nw
Santa Facts
No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organism yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. But since Santa doesn't (appear to) handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - or 378 million according to the Population Reference Bureau. At an average (cencus) rate of 3.5 children per household, that is 91.8 millions homes. One presumes there's at least one "good" child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels East to West (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each one of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around thwe earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but for the purpose of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75 and a half million miles, NOT counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding etc. This means Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3000 times the speed of sound. For purpose of comparison, the fastest man made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego Set (2 lbs), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On landing, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 330 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point 1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine reindeer. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload, not even counting the weight of the sleigh, to 353,430 tons! Again for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth!
353,430 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as space craft re-entering the earths atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of enery ... per second ... EACH! In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and creating deafening Sonic Booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vapourized within thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subject to centrifugal forces 17, times greater than gravity. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrosly slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.
In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve ...
he's dead now :-)

You need to get out more!!!
Well, Santa never visits me (sob). I write him a nice note, pour out a sherry and leave a plateful of mince pies. I hang my stocking out and every Christmas morning it's the same - empty. Why? I don't have a chimney!
Quote by The Shadow
You need to get out more!!!

Am I right in thinking you're the guy with the broken electric gates??. The same guy who is on first name terms with the van drivers from the booze brothers??. The chap who ordered all his christmas gifts over the internet??.
I need to get out more?? rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
Quote by iain_nw

You need to get out more!!!

Am I right in thinking you're the guy with the broken electric gates??. The same guy who is on first name terms with the van drivers from the booze brothers??. The chap who ordered all his christmas gifts over the internet??.
I need to get out more?? rotflmao :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
booze brothers is the only place to get a drink in brighton after 2am..
do my shopping on the internet as it saves time and means i can make of my time out
hope you all realise saint nick is russian, I for one will be leaving a bottle of vodka and a hot steaming bowl of borsch out for him.
and if its still there (and I'm not dead of blood toxicity) in the morning I'll be pouring the vodka into the beetroot soup and drinking it.
amen.
You need to get out more!!!
iain please don't get out more........i need ya here wi me :twisted: 69position hump :happy: rotflmao
Judy....... you don't believe in Santa anyway!!!!!! confused
You don't like this time of the year, you have beef instead of turkey for Christmas dinner, haven't sent one card (not even to me) and prob have cheap (not exclusive) tinsel wink
It's me who should be gutted by these ridiculous rumours about the facts that Santa can not theoretically exist :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
maz xxxxx (Off to consult a lawyer for human rights..... Santa does exist !!!!!!!!)
It's all lies !!!!!
Santa is one of the best known people in the world. I have never seen Ian_nw so perhaps HE isn't real !! :shock: :shock: :shock: confused :? :? :? :?
i'm so glad my daughter doesnt read these forums! if she heard some of your comments about santa it would destroy her.
as already said "but santa is magic" and whatever you come up with, you cant argue with magic! ...................can you?