The truth is out there!

30 Mar 2005

Recieved this on email today.... :shock:
I never knew such lies existed rolleyes

I particularly like social :twisted:
The A-Z of women's personal ads:
40-ish.............................................49
Adventurous..................................Slept with all your mates
Athletic...........................................No tits
Average looking............................Has a face like an arse
Beautiful........................................Pathological liar
Bubbly...........................................Fat, stupid & loud
Contagious Smile..........................Does a lot of pills
Driven...........................................Bossy
Educated.......................................Was fucked to bits at Uni'
Emotionally Secure......................On medication
Feminist........................................Fat
Free spirit....................................Junkie
Friendship first............................Former slut
Fun..............................................Annoying
Gentle.........................................Dull
New-Age...................................Body hair problems
Old-fashioned............................No BJs
Open-minded.............................Desperate
Outgoing....................................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate................................Sloppy drunk
Poet...........................................Depressive
Professional..............................Bitch
Romantic...................................Frigid
Social........................................Fanny like a clowns pocket
Voluptuous...............................Very Fat
Large lady................................Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate......................Stalker
Widow......................................Murderer

30 Mar 2005

Oh God, I replied to her advert as well, never know though, she may just write back.
That will be a first.
John wink

30 Mar 2005

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
I missed out with the 'educated' though, I never got fucked whilst at uni. Not by anyone I was at uni with anyway redface

30 Mar 2005

Quote by freckledbird
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
I missed out with the 'educated' though, I never got fucked whilst at uni. Not by anyone I was at uni with anyway

Just as long as you were not adventurous ! wink

30 Mar 2005

she sounds great........where can I meet her? :scared:

30 Mar 2005

Hi,
I'm a 39 y.o. former slut, pill popping junkie, but am on medication for it now :P
As I have slept with all my mates who now find me dull, annoying and depressive I'm left with a fanny like a clowns pocket. I'm loud and embarressing but desperate, so come on, please, give me a chance to stalk you!"
No cock pics no reply as I've already included mine to show you my fantasic under-arm mane.
Sloppy Drunk
Kent

30 Mar 2005

Quote by luv2lick
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:
I missed out with the 'educated' though, I never got fucked whilst at uni. Not by anyone I was at uni with anyway

Just as long as you were not adventurous ! wink

Not me, not ever adventurous :angel:

30 Mar 2005

Quote by Libra-Love
Hi,
I'm a 39 y.o. former slut, pill popping junkie, but am on medication for it now :P
As I have slept with all my mates who now find me dull, annoying and depressive I'm left with a fanny like a clowns pocket. I'm loud and embarressing but desperate, so come on, please, give me a chance to stalk you!"
No cock pics no reply as I've already included mine to show you my fantasic under-arm mane.
Sloppy Drunk
Kent

Can I buy you a drink or do you want to just get down to it? :twisted:

30 Mar 2005

Quote by Libra-Love
Hi,
I'm a 39 y.o. former slut, pill popping junkie, but am on medication for it now :P
As I have slept with all my mates who now find me dull, annoying and depressive I'm left with a fanny like a clowns pocket. I'm loud and embarressing but desperate, so come on, please, give me a chance to stalk you!"
No cock pics no reply as I've already included mine to show you my fantasic under-arm mane.
Sloppy Drunk
Kent

I think I've just fallen in love.
John
wink

30 Mar 2005

Quote by luv2lick
Can I buy you a drink or do you want to just get down to it? :twisted:

Nah...think I'll just hang around for someone to offer me a good few, or the whole bottle thanks lol

30 Mar 2005

Quote by Libra-Love

Can I buy you a drink or do you want to just get down to it? :twisted:

Nah...think I'll just hang around for someone to offer me a good few, or the whole bottle thanks lol

Damn..I quite fancied a 'soul mate'.... get that celebrity status! wink

30 Mar 2005

Quote by luv2lick

Can I buy you a drink or do you want to just get down to it? :twisted:

Nah...think I'll just hang around for someone to offer me a good few, or the whole bottle thanks lol

Damn..I quite fancied a 'soul mate'.... get that celebrity status! wink

Oh f*ck the soul just gimme the spirits :wink: evil

30 Mar 2005

Quote by Libra-Love

Can I buy you a drink or do you want to just get down to it? :twisted:

Nah...think I'll just hang around for someone to offer me a good few, or the whole bottle thanks lol

Damn..I quite fancied a 'soul mate'.... get that celebrity status! wink

Oh f*ck the soul just gimme the spirits :wink: evil

Errr what you saying...you have to get pissed to f*ck me??????
thats harsh..... :shock: :twisted: :twisted:

30 Mar 2005

Quote by luv2lick
Errr what you saying...you have to get pissed to f*ck me??????
thats harsh..... :shock: :twisted: :twisted:

Nah, not what I was saying, but it helps with the DTs :lol2:
Besides, that tongue could fill my clown's pocket quite nicely and then some :twisted:

30 Mar 2005

Quote by Libra-Love

Errr what you saying...you have to get pissed to f*ck me??????
thats harsh..... :shock: :twisted: :twisted:

Nah, not what I was saying, but it helps with the DTs :lol2:
Besides, that tongue could fill my clown's pocket quite nicely and then some :twisted:
Right...with that thought in my head..i'm off for my dinner... you keep drinking Libra... I will look like Brad Pitt in no time.... wink