Think about the young uns

12 Sep 2003

For a young couple its as hard as the single gals. Being 18/21 no one seems to take us seriously, excepting of course the thousands of guys who reply to the, 'Couple looking for Couple' ads. confused

We mention our ages and any older attractive couples or single gals turn their tails and run the other way. :cry:
The problem is the young people who we've met too are no better than the single guys, in fact are pretty much the single guys who've managed to find a poor impressionable girl to push into the scene, and are only after 'a shag with my missus'. mad

On the other hand there are many older guys and couples the same!
All we want are attractive couples and single girls to take us seriously. wink

ps. we're not against single guys but as you say Heather they're so many and pushy that we turn down more than we accept. We were lucking with the first guy we met tho! :P

12 Sep 2003

I can see your dilemma...
And I too have backed away from younger people. But I've had an instinct in those cases that it wasn't right for me at the time. I think it's the Mum in me coming out. biggrin

General rule of thumb time: Most swingers are in their 30s and some have kids near your age. The women will be conscious of this and it'll make them think three times... so it stands to reason it will take longer than usual for you to find playmates where all parties are comfortable.
And you make a good point about young girls being exploited.... I saw an example of that last week and nearly ended up thumping someone. evil

Can I just point out, though, I noticed you used the word 'attractive' several times in there.... Well, of course we have to find the people we are playing with attractive, but you could also be making people feel they
cannot live up to your expectations. You could be putting them off contacting you in the first place.... Worth a thought.
As with any social situation that may progress further, why not try just
making friends with other swingers before leaping at their tackle?
But best of luck with it.... you'll be flooded with PMs from guys... and I'm starting a book as to who those fellas will be. wink

Hxx

12 Sep 2003

I guess you may be right about the use of attractive over and over. confused

Also the making friends things is also a good point though we have always been into the take it slow and talk, get to know etc.
As I said the young couple we met, he was very pushy and controlling and tried to get the girls 2gether, they both wanted to but it was a new experience and they had to be comfortable.
Even afterwards he was obviously texting but pretending to be her.
She was very into it but put off by his uncaring selfish attitude, as is my young ladies sister, also in the scene but being exploited by a guy 26 yrs her senior.
Its sad that girls, and guys sometimes, who obviously want to do this are put off by pushy selfish husbands/boyfriends.

12 Sep 2003

Perhaps being new to this...(as we are) is to go to different clubs, at least then when you turn up at a club you appear to other swingers to be 95% serious. It is just us young ones have to come to terms that we are an extreme minority and most of that minority are just in it for a shag so they can prob. boast to there mates!!! It is a shame for us serious ones but as they say, thats life!!!
I think when you get out of your teenage years you will be taken a lot more seriously because as heather said, with the average age being late 30's these cpls will have children not many years different to what you are...they may think it is a bit wrong...just the way human nature is I suppose!
- but remember you are still young and you have many more years ahead of you that I am sure will be jam packed full of swinging....well
thats the way I look at it!!!
Take Care
Lis and Garry
xxx
:twisted:

12 Sep 2003

Do you know, hornyyoungleicestercouple (henceforth refered to as HYLC). You have really made me think. Started and stopped about 3 replies.
Picturing - Daughters wedding, "Hi dad, like you to meet my chief bridesmaid, she and her husband are from Leicester"
"Um, we have already met......" :shock: redface

:shock:
Something else on my "to talk about" list
Kat

12 Sep 2003

Hee hee, Kat!
HYLC have a really good point here. Young swingers (say under 25s), whether male, female or a couple, don't get taken seriously by a lot of people. I think there are several reasons for this.
As people have already said, most swingers are in their 30s and above and I think there is a certain amount of suspicion about the motives of younger swingers. When I was advertising as a single female, for men I would think long and hard about meeting any man (but it could apply to couples as well) under about 25, really because I consider a lot of young men not mature enough to "deal" with my lifestyle. This might sound patronising and I did meet several men under 25, in a couple of cases under 20 (but over the age of consent wink

) who were very mature in their outlook on life. I think that is what it comes down to - appearing mature. If you can convince people that although you're young in years, you are mature in outlook you have half won the battle.
Further, people shy away from young swingers, as they do not want to "take advantage" of people younger than them - this particularly applies to young female swingers. Recently I was in a club and there was a young woman, of about 20, with her partner who was much older than her. Guys were very reluctant to play with her as she looked "too young" - I overheard two guys discussing this, so I know that was the reason she was missing out. Again, with this it is up to you to be mature and to take the lead. Show people you are grown up enough to have a swinging good time!
I don't know how much of this applies to you, HYLC but I do sympathise with you. As people have said, it will get easier for you - don't let it put you off! lol

8) Remember, there are plenty of people out there who would love to play with people like you, many of whom may think they are not worthy of you - again up to you to convince them otherwise!
Good luck 8)

13 Sep 2003

From your previous description, on an earlier post, we think we saw you at G-Spot a couple of Fridays ago.
We both fancied, shall we say getting to know you better, but we have daughters older than you which put her off. She felt that she would be taking advantage if anything developed. He felt that you ( if it was you ) looked confident and comfortable and able to decide for yourselves.
Anyway, as is our way, unless both are in full agreement we did nothing and as we didn't fancy anyone else at the club left reasonably early. Yes we too have to find someone attractive.
Good luck. But you don't really need it. Just carry on being yourselves.
S&C

5 Nov 2003

Well thank you all for the good advice.
We had to take a break due to injury but we'll be ready to start again taking all you've said into account.
We have a long time ahead of us so its not a rush to do anything and I'm sure we'll grow into it.
D&J 69position

:love:

8 Nov 2003

Think we have got the same problem as a young couple from the north. Keeping are fingers crossed though.