*runs downstairs to have a weewee*
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thread stalkers
Quote by little gem
Genius - can i be your new stalker as you clearly have a great SOH!!
Dear New Stalker,
I would like to point out that if you are to be my new stalker you have to work out some way of restraining your pre-descessors. This will take high levels of cunning and sneakiness as there are lurkers everywhere. In every new post there is a potential new thread hound. See how paranoid they've got me? :uhoh:
You'll need to comply with the special code of conduct as laid down by the SH forces. It is a rather longwinded code and the title reflects the amount of time and effort The Sarge put into compiling the document. It has to be followed at all times when neutralising the enemy. If you think you are up to the challenge then I'll direct you immediately to the Swinging Tactical Unit for Persistant Idiots, Dickheads, Fuddyduddies and Overly Obsessive Lurker Skills. S.T.U.P.I.D.F.O.O.L.S. for short.
I wish you well in your quest. Tread carefully and remember your codes!
Yours hopefully
H. A. Rassed - SH towers
I shall endevour to whole heartedly do my duty to follow you every which way you post.
Quote by davidsplayroom
My dearest Thread Stalker,
I am writing to you today to let you know that I don't care if you put your toes behind your head while shagging, nor do I actually take note of what music you listen or what you think "rocks or sucks". I am not actually interested in anything you say just the fact that everytime I post........ there you are under me like a bad case of thrush asking to be scratched constantly.
I'd like to point out that if you don't stop thread stalking me soon, I will in fact take an SH injunction out on you where you have to become Jags' lapdog for 24hours and sit patiently until she frees you. Upon which the "ten post rule" becomes applicable, where the vicitm and the agressor have to be ten posts apart at all times ( see foot note for full details). The "ten post rule" is also better known as the Swinging Tactical Alliance for Lurkers Known to Everyone Rule.... aka S.T.A.L.K.E.R.
Any breach of the new "S.T.A.L.K.E.R." guidelines will be subject to either a whipping from JudyTV or a an evening suffering Mal's boredom.
Kind regards.
H. A. Rassed - SH towers.
footnote:
stop bloody following me now! Noesy bastard! I have one nerve left and you're getting on it! Get your own bloody footnote and leave me alone before I set my rotweiler on you!
Simply brilliant, funny, clever, and entertaining.
I think I shall be joining the stalk
David - looks like quite a mission we are taking on - are you man enough for it?
Master of Sex
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
Sex God
Quote by little gem
..I'd like to point out that if you don't stop thread stalking me soon, I will in fact take an SH injunction out on you where you have to become Jags' lapdog for 24hours and sit patiently until she frees you.
And this would be a bad thing....how
I like thread stalking..........gives us all a chance to flirt :twisted:
Sex God
Quote by Bazza64
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
Sex God
Quote by Angel Chat
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
You called.......
Master of Sex
Quote by Angel Chat
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
Angel hunny, if i was next to you, i wouldn't waste time sleeping :twisted: :twisted:
Sex God
Quote by the_Laird
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
You called.......
Quote by Bazza64
Angel hunny, if i was next to you, i wouldn't waste time sleeping :twisted: :twisted:
:bounce: :bounce: OK I now have a smile on my face again
:D And to the guy that stood me up last night
:flipa: Quote by mr filth
:shock: are you stalking me?
yep,is that ok ?!!??!?
Careful mind, Stalking NN might get you a night in the cells
Quote by naughtynymphos1
Don't know if this is the kind of thing your talking about but when people asks about mad things we have done this always springs to mind for me
starts off a bit boring but keep with it its quite funny at the end, well i think so :lol:
a few years ago me and sleazy (the hubby for those who don't know us) was walking down the street in the next village to where we lived then, having a bit of a bust up, as you do, anyway things got a bit heated and we was shouting rather loud next thing we know a cop car pulls up at the side of us and asks if everything is ok :shock:
So what do i say?
oh yes everything is fine hes my hubby and we just had a fall out? NOOOOOOOOO
i said....well no i'm not actually this guy has been following me for about 2 miles now and he not leave me alone......to this they arrested him and took him off in the car :lol2:
i just went home and made a cuppa :lol:
Quote by couple_ne2000
:shock: are you stalking me?
yep,is that ok ?!!??!?
Careful mind, Stalking NN might get you a night in the cells
Quote by naughtynymphos1
Don't know if this is the kind of thing your talking about but when people asks about mad things we have done this always springs to mind for me
starts off a bit boring but keep with it its quite funny at the end, well i think so :lol:
a few years ago me and sleazy (the hubby for those who don't know us) was walking down the street in the next village to where we lived then, having a bit of a bust up, as you do, anyway things got a bit heated and we was shouting rather loud next thing we know a cop car pulls up at the side of us and asks if everything is ok :shock:
So what do i say?
oh yes everything is fine hes my hubby and we just had a fall out? NOOOOOOOOO
i said....well no i'm not actually this guy has been following me for about 2 miles now and he not leave me alone......to this they arrested him and took him off in the car :lol2:
i just went home and made a cuppa :lol:
:shock:
Sex God
Quote by Angel Chat
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
Just lying there next to you? What the fluck use is that? A caress and a throb wouldn't go amiss fer starters!!
Sex God
Quote by westerross
Like most guys, i have a storker - every morning when i wake up!
I want one of those :lol2: Ooooh not attached to me though :uhoh: ... just lying there next to me :twisted: :twisted:
Just lying there next to you? What the fluck use is that? A caress and a throb wouldn't go amiss fer starters!!
Very true Mr Essence..... but I'm led to believe said storks can happen while the owner is still asleep... Can you think of a nicer way to be woken up than finding the hand (or something) of an angel on your stork? :twisted: :lol: :lol:
Sex God
Quote by Angel Chat
Very true Mr Essence..... but I'm led to believe said storks can happen while the owner is still asleep... Can you think of a nicer way to be woken up than finding the hand (or something) of an angel on your stork? :twisted:
No I bluddy can't! In fact I dream about it often - usually just before I wake up Mrs Chat!!
:lol: 
Sex God
Quote by westerross
Very true Mr Essence..... but I'm led to believe said storks can happen while the owner is still asleep... Can you think of a nicer way to be woken up than finding the hand (or something) of an angel on your stork? :twisted:
No I bluddy can't! In fact I dream about it often - usually just before I wake up Mrs Chat!!
:lol:Ahem thats Ms Chat if you don't mind!! There is no Mr Chat remember :lol:
well not one that i know about yet .
ops: