We have bought some vibrating eggs which are operated by a small hand held remote! Amazing fun! The first time we tried them out, Maz inserted them deep in her pussy and I had the remote in my pocket.
Down at the pub, she'd forgotten she had them inside her and had started to chat with Stewart the Landlord. After a while, I reached in my pocket and switched them on! As they started humming and vibrating, he must have wondered what she was doing! She startedd squirming and within seconds climaxed in front of him!
Next time I'll try them when she's at the gym!
Anyone else used them? £39 well spent!
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Vibrating Eggs
Down at the pub, she'd forgotten she had them inside her
Lucky girl - and what a great place to hide the mobile phone and the credit cards -
And sod trying the remote out in the gym - think huge - take her to a concert at the Albert Hall and fire the thing off during a John Cage piece.
Warming the Bed
Quote by TheRooG
Wow. They sound great.
I will have to get my missus some of them!
The RooG
Or an oyster for more public fun with a remote control ;)
Quote by unswung
Distasteful and offensive posting edited out by increasingly angry Mod.
This site has an AUP and you have broken it twice in the last couple of days. Last chance unswung cos we are all losing patience!:x
I genuinely cannot believe this. Please explain. How can you say my post was more 'distasteful' than the original? It was a joke, at NOBODIES EXPENSE.
It also appears that a thread has been deleted, which would be unoffensive to Mary Whitehouse, God rest her soul. What's the deal?
The thread has been deleted cos it was a copy of a weblink posted only last weekby somebody else. At least take the time to read postings by others.
Your post here has been deleted after consultation by a number of Mods - it was offensive and if you can't see why then maybe you need to think about it about a bit more! We have many members here who have strong views about that particular subject and you would have managed to undermine a belief of theirs without need. Having that activity take place in a gym or supermarkert is different completely to it taking place where you suggested you did... I wasn't alone in finding your comments offensive.
Please desist.
Your post here has been deleted after consultation by a number of Mods - it was offensive and if you can't see why then maybe you need to think about it about a bit more! We have many members here who have strong views about that particular subject and you would have managed to undermine a belief of theirs without need. Having that activity take place in a gym or supermarkert is different completely to it taking place where you suggested you did... I wasn't alone in finding your comments offensive.
Please desist.
Quote by Jags
The thread has been deleted cos it was a copy of a weblink posted only last week by somebody else. At least take the time to read postings by others.
Your post here has been deleted after consultation by a number of Mods - it was offensive and if you can't see why then maybe you need to think about it about a bit more! We have many members here who have strong views about that particular subject and you would have managed to undermine a belief of theirs without need. Having that activity take place in a gym or supermarkert is different completely to it taking place where you suggested you did... I wasn't alone in finding your comments offensive.
Please desist.
Well, I've pondered.
1. Fair play. Despite your condescending tone, I accept that although I did a quick look to see if said link had already been posted, I wasn't thorough enough.
2. This is the very FIRST joke on the actual general jokes thread:
Quote by daffodilbbw
A local vicar was paying a visit to one of his church members on a Friday night,and heard a loud party in progress as he approached the house.
He knocked on the door and the owner answered.
Behind him,he saw a circle of naked men,with blindfolded women moving from man to were fondling each man's cock and guessing who it belonged to.
The vicar,seeing this,said,"I'm sorry,i don't think i'd fit in here at the moment"
"Nonsense," the man replied,"Your name's been called 3 times already!"
:!:
I'm not trying to be provocative, I'm just flummoxed.
Sex God
Would this conversation be better through PM's? It just seems that you both have something to discuss and to avoid any personal comments it may be better between the two of you and not the forum.
Sorry, I have enough office politics in my life. I don't want to read it on the forums too.
By a not very well Mole who is getting stressed at work
Sorry, I have enough office politics in my life. I don't want to read it on the forums too.
By a not very well Mole who is getting stressed at work
:) On advise, in my last post on this thread, I'd like to say sorry for anybody offended by my post. It was intended as a joke, and maybe the lack of smilies made it appear to be ambiguous to the literal-minded, as I find humour can work better when it's not signposted. But obviously, with this bitter experience in mind, I can't claim to be an authority on the subject. 
I have never done the act discribed in my original post in a public place, and most certainly not in a church.
I won't use the Bill Hicks line about 'forgiveness' as it wouldn't be appropriate.
So, all I have left to say is - sorry.
I have never done the act discribed in my original post in a public place, and most certainly not in a church.
I won't use the Bill Hicks line about 'forgiveness' as it wouldn't be appropriate.
So, all I have left to say is - sorry.
SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...........
BACK TO THE MAIN POINT..................
I have a little metal egg thing, its not the remote controlled one, i just has a little wheel that you turn to make it go, but OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOD!!! Is it good!!
And it was only from a shop in Soho!! Even better!!
BACK TO THE MAIN POINT..................
I have a little metal egg thing, its not the remote controlled one, i just has a little wheel that you turn to make it go, but OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY GOOOOOOOOOOOD!!! Is it good!!
And it was only from a shop in Soho!! Even better!!
Quote by dazandlou
I have a little metal egg thing, its not the remote controlled one, i just has a little wheel that you turn to make it go..........
Wilma has so far had about a dozen of these..... :shock:
She likes them on her clit - especially during love making......
Problem is - as soon as she comes it is far too intense and she cannot get it off her clit fast enough. If she cannot reach the bloody thing she just pulls on the wire to get it off her clit and pulls the wire out of the egg......
Thats stops the bloody thing! :doh: :doh:
Hence the reason I have to keep soldering the wires back on!
:x :x Fred
ops: :oops: :oops: :oops: 
Sex God
Quote by FredFlintstone
Hence the reason I have to keep soldering the wires back on!
Fred
that is exactly what happened to mine!!!!!!
but i dont have a fred to fix mine... so threw it away!
:cry:
hehe, yeah i go through them like no ones business too!!
I did have ones with a rubber casing round the outside but my newest one is just hard plastic. This creates 2 problems,
1) It 'clacks' against my clit hood jewellery and is so noisey its distracting!
2) Its too damn smooth u can keep a grip on the lil' bugger!! especially when things get goin ;)
So i hav now given up with the damn thing lol.
Well it gives me a good excuse as any to go toy shopping :P (hurrah!)
Heehee :twisted:
I did have ones with a rubber casing round the outside but my newest one is just hard plastic. This creates 2 problems,
1) It 'clacks' against my clit hood jewellery and is so noisey its distracting!
2) Its too damn smooth u can keep a grip on the lil' bugger!! especially when things get goin ;)
So i hav now given up with the damn thing lol.
Well it gives me a good excuse as any to go toy shopping :P (hurrah!)
Heehee :twisted:
Quote by FredFlintstone
I have a little metal egg thing, its not the remote controlled one, i just has a little wheel that you turn to make it go..........
Wilma has so far had about a dozen of these..... :shock:
She likes them on her clit - especially during love making......
Problem is - as soon as she comes it is far too intense and she cannot get it off her clit fast enough. If she cannot reach the bloody thing she just pulls on the wire to get it off her clit and pulls the wire out of the egg......
Thats stops the bloody thing! :doh: :doh:
Hence the reason I have to keep soldering the wires back on!
:x :x Fred
FFS is nothing Sacred!!!
If it's not Sarge or Kat taking the piss it's you giving all my secrets away!!!
Wilma
Ex Forum User
Quote by FredFlintstone
I have a little metal egg thing, its not the remote controlled one, i just has a little wheel that you turn to make it go..........
Wilma has so far had about a dozen of these..... :shock:
She likes them on her clit - especially during love making......
Problem is - as soon as she comes it is far too intense and she cannot get it off her clit fast enough. If she cannot reach the bloody thing she just pulls on the wire to get it off her clit and pulls the wire out of the egg......
Thats stops the bloody thing! :doh: :doh:
Hence the reason I have to keep soldering the wires back on!
:x :x Fred
Oh you poor baby Fred, you get to watch your lovely lady cumming like a firecracker and you have the nerve to complain about soldering one little wire? :shock:
:wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink: :wink:
