WE ARE LEAVING

2 Apr 2006

Quote by HornyLittleBlonde

Just one of the reasons we are leaving Shireen. There was a post were we explained the violence we received at a certain club in Bristol last night but the mods on here have removed it , yet another reason why we are leaving.

Not entirely true! The Admin team moved it and you've been in PM correspondence with St3v3 about it and have given futher details about the alleged assault. St3v3 has TOLD you that he's going to be in touch with the club.
This is the message you got from him and to which you responded.

st3v3 wrote:
Hi,
Just moving your thread into the mods lounge to get the opinions of the other moderators, would you let me know what happened, also is this club listed in our clubs & parties section.
Steve
(admin)

NOT the same thing as the 'mods moving it' and another reason for you leaving here - what's the reason you gave at another site???
I'm sorry you had a difficult time at the club but the picture you are painting of how it's being dealt with here is just not true and can't be left undefended.
rolleyes

:roll: :roll:
(yep -sarcastic rolling eyes from me)
cool

Thanks Jags :thumbup:
That makes far more sense and I'm glad you posted it for all to see
Like I said we are not leaving the scene/websites because what happened with the response on here. We are , however, saddened, that a post, that we just wanted others to see as a warning, was considered unacceptable and removed for further investigation/discussion. Still, we accept that as you are the moderators it is your decision. We just sincerely hope that next time a swinger decides to leave that club early they don't end up battered, bruised or even worse.
PS When I replied to Shireen, saying , 'just one of the reasons we are leaving', I was referring to the, less than friendly response of a poster NOT the mods decision, which, even if we disagree, they are perfectly entitled to make.

2 Apr 2006

:cry: i dont know why or what happened at the club and i dont know what that has to do with this site however i am sorry that you are leaving under a cloud, but thank you for reading my questions in the cafe and taking the time to answer, its imput (right or wrong) which makes a website such as this any good so I for one wish you all the best smile

2 Apr 2006

Quote by flidais-media
Tell me if I'm bieng too nosey but has the incedent at the club last night the reason for you stopping swinging?
If so don't let it put you off!!

No we havn't stopped swinging...we will carry on doing that with our established friends and any others we happen to meet....but we are leaving the established websites and scenes .
I can understand your anger and frustration, if any establishment treated us in that way it would now be matchwood.
However, I have thought about this and really can't see why this should make you want to leave certain sites. It would probably make me think twice about ever going to another club, but would I leave a site where I have made good friends, where there are people who understand the situation and are more than willing to support me and help me get through this thing, I think not.
I have often made decisions in haste and then regretted them later, I would urge you to give yourself a little time before burning any bridges.
I am of course aware that I am not in possession of all the facts, so can only base my opinions on what I have read here.
What ever you decide, Caron and I wish you all the best for the future.

2 Apr 2006

quick question... I am not saying that i don't believe you at all.....and it was probably a really bad experience for you both.... but can i ask that if it was bad enough to tell us know about what happened and you have photographic proof... then wouldn't the best course of action be to make a complaint to the police.........
nobody should be allowed to get away with what amounts to assult on anyone......
sean xxxxxxxxxxxx

2 Apr 2006

Quote by flidais-media
But we are amazed that anyone would expect the club to give a true account what happened, realistically they are hardly likely to say 'oh yes, they said they didn't like the club so we shoved them out and assaulted them' are they? Realistically, we have no reason to tell anything but the truth about the club, we went there, in good faith, hoping for a fun evening...on the other hand, they will want to paint themselves as innocents to avoid the possibility of people not attending their club anymore.
In a case like this there is not 'right and wrong' on both sides. There is us, who are cut and bruised and a club who are not going to tell the truth about what happened. We trust that everyone here can see what we mean?

sets a bit of a dangerous precedent if people can give their side of a story, and the other side has no right to reply.
i have been in clubs and seen people acting awfully.
they have been thrown out of the club and told not to come back.
had these people wanted to get back at the club, they could have made the allegation of being assaulted by the club owner. had the club not had the right to reply this would have been assumed to be true.
not saying that you are lying, but there ARE always two sides to the story.

2 Apr 2006

Quote by well_busty_babe
But we are amazed that anyone would expect the club to give a true account what happened, realistically they are hardly likely to say 'oh yes, they said they didn't like the club so we shoved them out and assaulted them' are they? Realistically, we have no reason to tell anything but the truth about the club, we went there, in good faith, hoping for a fun evening...on the other hand, they will want to paint themselves as innocents to avoid the possibility of people not attending their club anymore.
In a case like this there is not 'right and wrong' on both sides. There is us, who are cut and bruised and a club who are not going to tell the truth about what happened. We trust that everyone here can see what we mean?

sets a bit of a dangerous precedent if people can give their side of a story, and the other side has no right to reply.
i have been in clubs and seen people acting awfully.
they have been thrown out of the club and told not to come back.
had these people wanted to get back at the club, they could have made the allegation of being assaulted by the club owner. had the club not had the right to reply this would have been assumed to be true.
not saying that you are lying, but there ARE always two sides to the story.
There are people on here who know us, we are a middle aged, professional. couple who just left a club because it wasn't our sort of place. We are not the sort of thugs who frequent clubs to cause trouble. Really we don't wish to add any more here, we've said how we feel and we will leave it at that.
To Fabio, yes, we do have photographic evidence of the injury and, if need be, will use it but, for the reasons started above (ie we ARE a professional couple) we can't say we really want our activities to end up in court and, subsequently, the newpapers, which are, almost, bound to happen if we prosecuted.

2 Apr 2006

Quote by fabio grooverider
quick question... I am not saying that i don't believe you at all.....and it was probably a really bad experience for you both.... but can i ask that if it was bad enough to tell us know about what happened and you have photographic proof... then wouldn't the best course of action be to make a complaint to the police.........
nobody should be allowed to get away with what amounts to assult on anyone......
sean xxxxxxxxxxxx

just to reply to this i for one didnt go to the police when i had an incident and the main reason for this is the protection of my family......not saying that there wud trouble for them but they dont need to know their mum's life style, so by bringing the police in my children and family wud have to be told
i think as a community that we shud be giving support and i know many on here will........just think of wot u wud feel like if it happened to u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I for one know that feeling and it is one of the worst, its a time for questioning urself, its a time were u are disgusted with the choices u make in life and its a time of being damn rite miserable.....this couple do not have to justify why they havent been the police to any1!!!

2 Apr 2006

Quote by chesty_bird
quick question... I am not saying that i don't believe you at all.....and it was probably a really bad experience for you both.... but can i ask that if it was bad enough to tell us know about what happened and you have photographic proof... then wouldn't the best course of action be to make a complaint to the police.........
nobody should be allowed to get away with what amounts to assult on anyone......
sean xxxxxxxxxxxx

just to reply to this i for one didnt go to the police when i had an incident and the main reason for this is the protection of my family......not saying that there wud trouble for them but they dont need to know their mum's life style, so by bringing the police in my children and family wud have to be told
i think as a community that we shud be giving support and i know many on here will........just think of wot u wud feel like if it happened to u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I for one know that feeling and it is one of the worst, its a time for questioning urself, its a time were u are disgusted with the choices u make in life and its a time of being damn rite miserable.....this couple do not have to justify why they havent been the police to any1!!!
:thumbup:

2 Apr 2006

chesty...
i only said what i did with regards to the police because if it did happen (and knowing both of them i have no reason to disbelieve them at all) then they shouldn't get away with it full stop... for example what happens to the next people who have the misfortune to cross their path....heaven forbid if next time it is more than an assult!!!! especially if they have photographic evidence to back it up......
from the sites standpoint i can see why it is a very fine line, because there are two sides to every story and it is a very serious allegation (again i have no reason not to believe them)

2 Apr 2006

Quote by chesty_bird
quick question... I am not saying that i don't believe you at all.....and it was probably a really bad experience for you both.... but can i ask that if it was bad enough to tell us know about what happened and you have photographic proof... then wouldn't the best course of action be to make a complaint to the police.........
nobody should be allowed to get away with what amounts to assult on anyone......
sean xxxxxxxxxxxx

just to reply to this i for one didnt go to the police when i had an incident and the main reason for this is the protection of my family......not saying that there wud trouble for them but they dont need to know their mum's life style, so by bringing the police in my children and family wud have to be told
i think as a community that we shud be giving support and i know many on here will........just think of wot u wud feel like if it happened to u!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I for one know that feeling and it is one of the worst, its a time for questioning urself, its a time were u are disgusted with the choices u make in life and its a time of being damn rite miserable.....this couple do not have to justify why they havent been the police to any1!!!
Thank you to both of you, it is good that there are some people here than understand our position. x

2 Apr 2006

As a 47 year old who has been a "swinger" on and off for the best part of 30 years and is a member of several clubs up and down the country, I find it deeply offensive that a moderator on this site should have the effrontery to suggest that I may have acted awfully and been thrown out!!
I was leaving of my own volition since there are low rent venues and no rent venues and this was definately in the latter category.
In all of my years swinging I have never been a) stopped by the owners/managers to demand to know why I am leaving b) been insulted by said indivuduals when leaving and c) been physically assaulted to the extent that I was left cut and bleeding!
I would have thought it for the betterment of the "swinging community" that venues such as this one are flagged as places to avoid given the above experience.
Seemingly none of us are allowed to recant an experience and voice an opinion anymore.
So much for free speech and freedom of expression!!

2 Apr 2006

If from what your saying is true and we have no reason to not to believe you at all I for one would be well and truly miffed beyond belief!! In saying that I would heed the Sarge's advice and sleep on things for a day or two as your bound to be feeling raw and piss*d off at the min with all who you feel are against you.......
I for one wouldn't take anything said on here to heart or personal as they just don't know you eh.. If it really was personal I would have chucked the towel in ages ago and probably wanted to smack a few mouths along the way but I soon realised people don't mean any harm in the sarcasm snipes and digs they dish out nor having a post blocked locked or chucked should reflect on you in anyway as a person, let people judge after they have met and got to know you.
For what its worth we left a club not so long back.. not a million miles away from the midlands and were asked why we were leaving... a little odd we thought too, wonder if it was the same place?? Anyway as the Sarge rightly said (God its gone mad I'm agreeing with Sarge) sleep on it and decide for real once things are not so raw in your minds..
Good luck guys......
Mike

2 Apr 2006

Quote by mdr2000
If from what your saying is true and we have no reason to not to believe you at all I for one would be well and truly miffed beyond belief!! In saying that I would heed the Sarge's advice and sleep on things for a day or two as your bound to be feeling raw and piss*d off at the min with all who you feel are against you.......
I for one wouldn't take anything said on here to heart or personal as they just don't know you eh.. If it really was personal I would have chucked the towel in ages ago and probably wanted to smack a few mouths along the way but I soon realised people don't mean any harm in the sarcasm snipes and digs they dish out nor having a post blocked locked or chucked should reflect on you in anyway as a person, let people judge after they have met and got to know you.
For what its worth we left a club not so long back.. not a million miles away from the midlands and were asked why we were leaving... a little odd we thought too, wonder if it was the same place?? Anyway as the Sarge rightly said (God its gone mad I'm agreeing with Sarge) sleep on it and decide for real once things are not so raw in your minds..
Good luck guys......
Mike

Thank you for your thoughtful post. By the way, the club was not in the Midlands but in Bristol, where we live, I think (unless it's been removed) that the name is elsewhere on this thread.
As we said, we aren't leaving swinging as such, we have both been doing it too long for that, just being very selective with who we meet and where we go (hence choosing to avoid all clubs from now on). As such there seems little point in staying on here as such. Havn't decided yet (unless the decision is made for us) whether or not we will close our membership but we certainly will not be posting on here (outside of this thread) or attending any events.

2 Apr 2006

flidais ........... I dont know you but
Media............ I do know you and :kiss:
Don't leave the site because its not the site that has "done you wrong"
I can understand how angry, upset, annoyed you both must be ............. but............ many people have posted to say dont leave .................... and I dont believe that those feelings dont mean anything to you. It would mean something to me !
So, give each other a cuddle and get back to having a giggle with those who do care .... and ignore those who dont !!!
Take care of each other
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (the one who likes the pointy end of the plane lol)

2 Apr 2006

Quote by blonde
flidais ........... I dont know you but
Media............ I do know you and :kiss:
Don't leave the site because its not the site that has "done you wrong"
I can understand how angry, upset, annoyed you both must be ............. but............ many people have posted to say dont leave .................... and I dont believe that those feelings dont mean anything to you. It would mean something to me !
So, give each other a cuddle and get back to having a giggle with those who do care .... and ignore those who dont !!!
Take care of each other
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx (the one who likes the pointy end of the plane lol)

Thanks Blonde but it's not the 'site' as such that we are leaving but the 'scene', the site is just part of it. We are aware there are many truly good and genuine people around here and we are glad of their support but we have decided, for now, that the best thing we can do is to 'swing' with our own contacts and not be part of a 'scene' as such. Hope this makes sense? Those who know, and care, about us know how to get in touch and, hopefully we will meet up with them at some time in the future. xxx

2 Apr 2006

Think about it from this point of view.
The club disagrees with your version and contacts the site via a solicito, something along the lines of "You are libelling our club and affecting our business we intend to sue blah de blah..." In light of recent rulings you may also find yourself a recipient. You aren't just giving a bad review as a customer you are accusing them of a criminal attack.
With no investigated outcome, then legally the club would be in the right.
This isn't to say I disbelieve you at all, and I agree with others that you can make a contribution to the site. I can also understand how upset you are but please take some time to think it through from all angles.
Good luck to you both whatever you decide.
Jas
XXX

2 Apr 2006

Quote by Jas-Tim
Think about it from this point of view.
The club disagrees with your version and contacts the site via a solicito, something along the lines of "You are libelling our club and affecting our business we intend to sue blah de blah..." In light of recent rulings you may also find yourself a recipient. You aren't just giving a bad review as a customer you are accusing them of a criminal attack.
With no investigated outcome, then legally the club would be in the right.
This isn't to say I disbelieve you at all, and I agree with others that you can make a contribution to the site. I can also understand how upset you are but please take some time to think it through from all angles.
Good luck to you both whatever you decide.
Jas
XXX

We have photograhic evidence of the assault. However, as I am sure you understand we are not in a position, as others have understood, to post a criminal complaint against the club. We are therefore, in a position, of just hoping others from here will never frequent this club and run the risk, as we did, of getting the same treatment if they chose to leave. We are just hoping that no-one ends up in a far worse situation than we did.

2 Apr 2006

we both wish u all the best xxx

2 Apr 2006

:shock:

2 Apr 2006

Quote by flidais-media
Tweeky that was a bit harsh.....

Just one of the reasons we are leaving Shireen. There was a post were we explained the violence we received at a certain club in Bristol last night but the mods on here have removed it , yet another reason why we are leaving.
Thank you for those of you who have supported us and, we have to say, goodbye to a 'not so friendly' community of others.
Apologys to all, it was am and had consumed most of a bottle of bootlegger dark rum. Sometimes this leads to me taking and posting pictures of myeself in my rather unfashionable socks but it appears last night this led to me being a little over sarcastic. As I have said in the past just give me a :kick:
Sorry to here what happened to you, we also live in Bristol so wont be visiting any clubs now as obviously the post has been removed so we wont know what one to avoid. I only knew of two anyway but I think I can guess which one you are talking of.
Apologys once again.
Mr Tweeky

2 Apr 2006

Quote by tweeky
Tweeky that was a bit harsh.....

Just one of the reasons we are leaving Shireen. There was a post were we explained the violence we received at a certain club in Bristol last night but the mods on here have removed it , yet another reason why we are leaving.
Thank you for those of you who have supported us and, we have to say, goodbye to a 'not so friendly' community of others.
Apologys to all, it was am and had consumed most of a bottle of bootlegger dark rum. Sometimes this leads to me taking and posting pictures of myeself in my rather unfashionable socks but it appears last night this led to me being a little over sarcastic. As I have said in the past just give me a :kick:
Sorry to here what happened to you, we also live in Bristol so wont be visiting any clubs now as obviously the post has been removed so we wont know what one to avoid. I only knew of two anyway but I think I can guess which one you are talking of.
Apologys once again.
Mr Tweeky
AND SO YOU SHOULD BE APOLOGISING!!
Taking and posting pics of yourself in your unfashionable socks........is well out of order!!!

2 Apr 2006

I've only just come upon this thread, I'm sorry to hear about what happened to you two, I hope you recover from what was undoubtedly a horrendous experience. And I hope that after further reflection you feel that you can stay posting in here - you definitely make a worthy contribution to discussions in here and in another place.
Regarding your posting of details on here: I have never run my own website or internet forum of any sort - I don't know whether you have - but if I did run one I think I would be very wary of letting anyone post a post where they made serious allegations of lawbreaking against someone else. As we have hear in the media, the laws of libel do in fact cover what is written on the internet, and any allegation of lawbreaking, however trustworthy the person making it is, and however much evidence they have, would be something that could have serious repercussions, and I would at least first remove the post until I could take appropriate legal advice, which is what i guess the admin people here have done.
As I said, I hope that on reflection, you feel able to stay around, at least for the discussions.
Mike.

2 Apr 2006

Quote by da69ve
Tweeky that was a bit harsh.....

Just one of the reasons we are leaving Shireen. There was a post were we explained the violence we received at a certain club in Bristol last night but the mods on here have removed it , yet another reason why we are leaving.
Thank you for those of you who have supported us and, we have to say, goodbye to a 'not so friendly' community of others.
Apologys to all, it was am and had consumed most of a bottle of bootlegger dark rum. Sometimes this leads to me taking and posting pictures of myeself in my rather unfashionable socks but it appears last night this led to me being a little over sarcastic. As I have said in the past just give me a :kick:
Sorry to here what happened to you, we also live in Bristol so wont be visiting any clubs now as obviously the post has been removed so we wont know what one to avoid. I only knew of two anyway but I think I can guess which one you are talking of.
Apologys once again.
Mr Tweeky
AND SO YOU SHOULD BE APOLOGISING!!
Taking and posting pics of yourself in your unfashionable socks........is well out of order!!!
and to make it worse when I got up the next morning and briefly thought about getting rid of them they had already been quoted sad

Mr Tweeky