being a member of the dreaded single male group I realise that to attract the attention of a lady browsing the adds i need to make myself stand out from the crowd. Any of you lovely ladies care to give us guys a few tips. What do you look for in an add? I know everyone is different but there must be a few common denominators. on the same theme what do you look for in replies to your adds. Also (3 for the price of one here) why do so many ladies reply, chat for a while and then dissappear off the face of the earth. I personally would prefer to be told i dont match up rather than just be left hanging
Join the most popular community of UK swingers now
Login
what makes a lady respond to an add?
Sex God
Just a thought:
If someone asked me what would make me want to respond to their ad, I wouldn't tell them. If I told them, they'd just do what I suggested, it wouldn't be them writing the ad. I'd rather let them speak for themselves, thus enabling me to eliminate at least 99% with barely a glance, thereby speeding up the whole process.
If someone asked me what would make me want to respond to their ad, I wouldn't tell them. If I told them, they'd just do what I suggested, it wouldn't be them writing the ad. I'd rather let them speak for themselves, thus enabling me to eliminate at least 99% with barely a glance, thereby speeding up the whole process.
Sex God
Quote by johnneuk1
lack of sex, excitement,bordom, nothing better to do
None of the above!
On the odd occasion I used to respond to an ad it was because it came across as genuine, honest and different.
The guy sounded intelligent, well mannered and not desperate and I had to be able to get at least a small insight into that person. Those who say next to nothing about themselves, or only what they want never interested me, after all sex is a two way thing.
'm not a fan of cock pics but that's personal preference and I do know ladies who like them.
In short, be yourself, say something about yourself that makes people want to find out more - stand out from the crowd.
Quote by JudyTV
being a member of the dreaded single male group I realise that to attract the attention of a lady browsing the adds i need to make myself stand out from the crowd. Any of you lovely ladies care to give us guys a few tips. What do you look for in an add? I know everyone is different but there must be a few common denominators. on the same theme what do you look for in replies to your adds. Also (3 for the price of one here) why do so many ladies reply, chat for a while and then dissappear off the face of the earth. I personally would prefer to be told i dont match up rather than just be left hanging
racer,
I think you will find that most females don't need to look at the ads at all, most can just sit back and watch their in box fill up each time they update their own ads.
Ads very quickly ( within hours ) drop off the first couple of pages and within days that could well be 10 or 20 pages down the line and after a few weeks are lost in the ads section abyss. Its amazing how the response is regenerated after updating ones ad. This shows just how many people get fed up after the first couple of pages of reading the ads. I personally only read the ads on very wet Sunday afternoons when I have a spare couple of hours even then its a hard slog due to the sheer volume. Its very much a lottery I feel.
Anyone got the figures for the number of ads in each section and then the total number of ads on SH?
Judy
hi judy, just checked: 45 ladies looking for blokes. 4771 blokes looking for ladies.
guess your right. wish i knew how to put quotes in the little white box
Quote by racer3
I personally would prefer to be told i dont match up rather than just be left hanging
Ahhh, feedback... that most valuable of commodities
. Feedback is an important part of the type of work that I've been doing for the past few years, so I appreciate it when it is given constructively, & can use it to improve what I do... & get improved feedback as a result.Sp does anyone ever give me feedback about how to improve my adverts, or why when I go on a date they don't fancy me? Of course not, because they are far too embarassed, & would naturally assume that like many blokes, I might respond angrily. :shock: . So I'm just left wondering... Did I do anything wrong on the date, or was there some other reason that I had no control over? :roll:
Quote by Lil_Bunny
lack of sex, excitement,bordom, nothing better to do
None of the above!
On the odd occasion I used to respond to an ad it was because it came across as genuine, honest and different.
The guy sounded intelligent, well mannered and not desperate and I had to be able to get at least a small insight into that person. Those who say next to nothing about themselves, or only what they want never interested me, after all sex is a two way thing.
'm not a fan of cock pics but that's personal preference and I do know ladies who like them.
In short, be yourself, say something about yourself that makes people want to find out more - stand out from the crowd.
:roll: bit like me then,see above,edit :roll:
:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao: Quote by Lil_Bunny
lack of sex, excitement,bordom, nothing better to do
None of the above!
On the odd occasion I used to respond to an ad it was because it came across as genuine, honest and different.
The guy sounded intelligent, well mannered and not desperate and I had to be able to get at least a small insight into that person. Those who say next to nothing about themselves, or only what they want never interested me, after all sex is a two way thing.
'm not a fan of cock pics but that's personal preference and I do know ladies who like them.
In short, be yourself, say something about yourself that makes people want to find out more - stand out from the crowd.
Yet again, I have to agree with Bunny.
As I'm not looking to meet anyone, I rarely bother with the ads. I will sometimes look at an ad if I already 'know' the person online, just out of curiosity.
What puts me off is 2 or 3 mis-spelt, grammatically incorrect lines about height, cock-size and oral technique. ... and of course, the cock pic :roll:
What I would like to see, what interests me is a well-written, informative [piece that shows your personality .. you can't go wrong with a little subtle humour and sharing your general interests outside the swinging world. Yes, of course you want to put in whether you're into w/s or bdsm but other stuff is nice to read too.
Pics-wise, if you can show a clear face pic, then please do - it will up your chances, I reckon. A full-body clothed or semi-clothed pic is nice but not essential. If you must put on a cock pic, then may I suggest you just stick to basic hard-on type rather than bj or other 'action' pic.
Basically, don't post "Sxxy stud 2 fuck u. Lancs. 9 incher. Cum on, ladeez, ya knows ya wantz me innit. No mingerz or gayz or i'll knock ya out".
But all this is just MY opinion so feel free to ignore :roll:
edit: sorry, I haven't finished yet. Why do people chat for ages and then disappear? Loads of reasons! Maybe they liked you but not enough to pursue it any further? Maybe their personal situation changed so they're no longer seeking to swing? Maybe their husband found out and threw the PC out? Maybe they're timewasters who only came on here for the the thrill ansd chase but duck out when it comes to the crunch? Maybe they've lost your details and are waiting for you to contact them? Maybe they've got an msn contact list so big they can't remember who's who but the ones they do remember are obviously worth keeping in touch with and those forgettable ones aren't?
Again ... just me .... what do I know??
Sex God
Quote by johnneuk1
can't comment on you Johnneuk1 since I don't know u, haven't seen an ad and u seem to post rather short messages which u then edit!!!!!!!
hi Lil-BUNNY
am in adds for men for couples, if you must, don,t know much about you either except your from northeast, have wharpped sence of humor ,that do,nt always work,pretty harmless or meant to be
edit was bit of fun
life is bit serious at min trying to brighten things up in my own little way,sometimes it don,t work such is life,
Sex God
Id have to echo Libra and say , its finding the' Lady' thats gonna be yer problem first . One step at a time mate :-)
I ve responded to a few ads, usually when i needed someone new to fuck and when the advertisement seemed interesting.
I could advertise myself and have done in the past, but as i get so many replies from idots who havent read my ad it seems pointless. I have no wish to have my box filled by twats who cant read, have no definable sense of humour and are clearly iliterate.
Box filling is not clever!!
answering ads myself lets me be in cotrol of who i am shortlisting
I could advertise myself and have done in the past, but as i get so many replies from idots who havent read my ad it seems pointless. I have no wish to have my box filled by twats who cant read, have no definable sense of humour and are clearly iliterate.
Box filling is not clever!!
answering ads myself lets me be in cotrol of who i am shortlisting
Quote by foxylady 123
I ve responded to a few ads, usually when i needed someone new to fuck and when the advertisement seemed interesting.
I could advertise myself and have done in the past, but as i get so many replies from idots who havent read my ad it seems pointless. I have no wish to have my box filled by twats who cant read, have no definable sense of humour and are clearly iliterate.
Box filling is not clever!!
answering ads myself lets me be in cotrol of who i am shortlisting
Damn...And I so wanted to fill your box....but not with twats.... :twisted: Sex God
Quote by johnneuk1
hi Lil-BUNNY
am in adds for men for couples, if you must, don,t know much about you either except your from northeast, have wharpped sence of humor ,that do,nt always work,pretty harmless or meant to be
edit was bit of fun
life is bit serious at min trying to brighten things up in my own little way,sometimes it don,t work such is life,
Not sure if I've ever been called harmless before lol
Ask and I'll tell u all about me.
What's your ad number? - I'm curious
Sex God
Quote by johnneuk1
just typical single guy add with cock shot probably won,t interest you at all
Well at least u were honest.
Aint you I'm not interested in BTW - it's the whole sexual part of swinging that no longer interests me - I much prefer the social side
Sexlightened
I don't mind drawing up a reply to an ad, tailoring it to the individual advert and not getting a reply. I know its frustrating but I do appreciate that woman (and couples it seems) get far too many responses to answer them all.
What does get me cheesed off is as Racer3 says, you get a reply, you chat and then they disappear, without even so much as a thanks but no thanks.
Now it seems there are some not so nice guys on here, equally there are some perfectly fine chaps on here and I would urge you ladies and couples to at least give those good guys the courtesy of saying bye if you find you are not interested in them any further. At least we are not left wondering...nor is there any harm in parting as just good friends.
What does get me cheesed off is as Racer3 says, you get a reply, you chat and then they disappear, without even so much as a thanks but no thanks.
Now it seems there are some not so nice guys on here, equally there are some perfectly fine chaps on here and I would urge you ladies and couples to at least give those good guys the courtesy of saying bye if you find you are not interested in them any further. At least we are not left wondering...nor is there any harm in parting as just good friends.
Sex God
Quote by JudyTV
I too went through this no sex phase just after Christmas it was new years day and I didn't get over it until January 2nd . I knew I was over the worst when I woke up with a bit of a stiffy and the headache had gone.
Judy. ................fully recovered and in desperate need of a shag.
PMSL Judy
My sex drive is higher than ever yet I don't want to swing!
Think I'm mising the emotional side of life more these days but just not quite ready to go back to the dating lark.
Sex God
Quote by johnneuk1
BTW = by the way
