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What's the best object?

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True story... The first time I ever visited the flat of my most recent ex-girlfriend's, I happened to spot on her mantelpiece a candle in a holder that had a distinct curve to it. I seem to remember mentioning it at the time, but didn't get a cohesive response. However, a couple of months later she admitted to me the reason it had a curve was that she had used it to have a wank one day and it apparently got warm enough to bend slightly!
This got me thinking about the best objects any of us has used to get off. My suspicion is that there are more houehold objects that would suit female use rather than male, but would be curious to know.
For my part, I will admit to trying the loaf of bread trick redface and it was just about OK, but nothing special.
the loaf of bread trick???? dunno
i know the warm apple pie one, but bread? its a new one on me...
unless we're talking French Sticks here :shock:
Banana's
Empty clean beer or wine bottles
redface surprisedops:
The bread trick... it's the same as the warm apple pie one except you substitute a loaf of bread (unsliced obviously, otherwise there is one helluva mess to clean up) lol
hope it wasnt a crusty farmhouse bloomer then luv rotflmao
Crusty is fine, as long as cut off the heel first *ouch*
Don't cucumbers disintegrate if you're too vigourous?
Quote by delsutton
Don't cucumbers disintegrate if you're too vigourous?

nah, the trick is to select the freshest and firmest you can find, keep it refrigerated and dont touch it if its anywhere near the sell by date. slipping a condom over it also helps
not that I'd know of course :shock:
*avoids veg aisle in Sainsburys for at least a week now* redface surprisedops:
Darkfire
You must know that dambuster's not seen this yet as he hasn't posted pics of two certain things lol
Nothing surprising in here... was hoping to c csomething really outrageous! The bendy candle was funny though!
Cucumbers redface surprisedops:
(voids veg section of tesco's for the next 2 weeks as well!)
I'm waiting for somone to admit to trying the vacuum cleaner one. Suction at 10!
Quote by Sarah
Cucumbers redface surprisedops:
(voids veg section of tesco's for the next 2 weeks as well!)

LOL... you didnt do it IN tesco did you...? you naughty girl!
Seen a girl use the pointed bed post at foot of the bed.
pointed?? :shock:
did her alter-ego tell her she's a kebab?? :shock:
Quote by matureladylover
Seen a girl use the pointed bed post at foot of the bed.
#
Sounds painfull... but fun to watch...
Bannister end poles are also supposedly a favourite but luckily they tend to be rounded
Quote by delsutton
Bannister end poles are also supposedly a favourite but luckily they tend to be rounded

lol... hope the dont slip....
The trick, apparently, is to use a harness
really...., interesting... you have pics?lol
Quote by TamworthGuy
really...., interesting... you have pics?lol

I used to, but she took them back *lol*
lol... gutted huh.... ui insutton coldfield?
anyone seen those new shaped shower heads? redface
says no more :smile2:
dee
Once had an Old girlfriend that use to ride the gearstick in my first car. (Ford Cortina) was a bugger when we stopped at lights thou smile and no it wasn't an automatic.
She also had a thing for an aliuminum rolling pin confused .......... I never had any home made pastries when invited for dinner.
Quote by delsutton
I'm waiting for somone to admit to trying the vacuum cleaner one. Suction at 10!

Tried that with an upright.....
they call me stumpy now :cry:
An old g/f of mine used to enjoy the pleasures of a wooden toilet roll holder when alone in the bathroom.
I recall seeing a TV program some time ago about an “artist” who was doing a “piece” involving candles. It appears that the chap would approach a likely looking lass, and explain the concept behind his work before asking the lass to help with the project.
The project involved inserting a candle into the volunteer, digitally stimulating her to orgasm, whereupon the heat of the body plus the writhing and muscular contractions would distort the candle. The distorted candle was then displayed as part of his masterpiece.
Nice work if you can get it……
Quote by firelizard
I recall seeing a TV program some time ago about an “artist” who was doing a “piece” involving candles. It appears that the chap would approach a likely looking lass, and explain the concept behind his work before asking the lass to help with the project.
The project involved inserting a candle into the volunteer, digitally stimulating her to orgasm, whereupon the heat of the body plus the writhing and muscular contractions would distort the candle. The distorted candle was then displayed as part of his masterpiece.
Nice work if you can get it……

Was you the artist or the subject?
makes a mental note just drop candles into conversation wait for reaction lol