When was the first time you got really legless, totally smashed, rat-arsed?
Where were you?
What were you drinking and what happened?
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When was the first time...
Sex God
uuuummmmm . . . . you mean unconscious falling down drunk dontcha?
eerrrrr . . . blues party before last . . . to the point of snoozing semi naked in the kitchen, having to be carried to the taxi by a friendly mod, very nearly coming to blows in the street, and being undressed and put to bed by 4 people!
ops: :oops:
it wasn't big, and it wasn't clever! :oops:
i blame the voddie jelly! rocket fuel that is! :lol2: :P
n x x x :P
eerrrrr . . . blues party before last . . . to the point of snoozing semi naked in the kitchen, having to be carried to the taxi by a friendly mod, very nearly coming to blows in the street, and being undressed and put to bed by 4 people!
ops: :oops:it wasn't big, and it wasn't clever! :oops:
i blame the voddie jelly! rocket fuel that is! :lol2: :P
n x x x :P
how should I know? I were totally pissed.! However through forensic investigation and flashbacks, it was probably a combination of beer, cider, spirits then those bottles behind the bar that nobody EVER drinks or anyones ever heard of .....The day started normally enough just having a "quiet drink." with friends then things went kind a automatic like "a drink happens " you ask who's drink is that? ...yours ! so drink it etc etc ps if anyone lost a bra about 1986 in the Gloucestershire area I can return it.....
Quote by PoloLady
When was the first time you got really legless, totally smashed, rat-arsed?
Where were you?
What were you drinking and what happened?
I was about 11, my dad was babysitting, (parents divorced). And he let me drink as much Holsten Pils as I could. I was very sick, and my mother went berserk when she got home. Still remember spending hours with my head down the big white telephone though! :shock:
I was 14, sleeping over at a mates house. We pooled our resources and got the cheapest crap in the shop, with her hiding round the corner because the shop assistant knew her, and me blagging being 18 lol! I got a 2 litre bottle of cider, a 2 litre bottle of lager and 4 cheap cans of lager with the change. We drank it, we mixed it, we drank some more, and some more and some more. Oh god I was soooo ill that night, good job her mum was one of those 'can't be arsed' types who let us get on with it 
Only ever did it once again after that, at age 17, our YTS scheme manager decided it would be good to have a christmas party in a BAR, despite us all being underage! A whole bottle of Concorde, some martini and a few voddys later I was taken back to my flat and dumped unceremoniously on the bed to puke/sleep it off
Only ever did it once again after that, at age 17, our YTS scheme manager decided it would be good to have a christmas party in a BAR, despite us all being underage! A whole bottle of Concorde, some martini and a few voddys later I was taken back to my flat and dumped unceremoniously on the bed to puke/sleep it off I was 14 and had just been to a new years was held where i worked on weekends and some of the staff were giving me free bottles of Grolsch :shock: .After the do my brother drove me and some of his mates to one of their houses where we were staying.I felt a bit rough in the car so they told me to sit in the back and moved some of their coats to my side,as they thought if i hurled it would be straight wrong were they,i covered all their coats and when we got to the house spent 2 hours being fed salt water and puking down the toilet,falling in and out of consciousness.
Evidently later on when we were all in the living room trying to sleep,i got up for a pee and walked into a cupboard and kept walikng in and out thinking it was the door to the toilet.
It should have taught me,but it never did
Evidently later on when we were all in the living room trying to sleep,i got up for a pee and walked into a cupboard and kept walikng in and out thinking it was the door to the toilet.
It should have taught me,but it never did
i was 13 and it was the night before i left to move to holland!!
i thought if i got really drunk i wouldnt have to go, instead i threw up over my suede shoes and ended up n an ambulance!!
I cant remember a thing, not even what i was drinking, apart from lying in the porch and my Mum laughin at me!!
i thought if i got really drunk i wouldnt have to go, instead i threw up over my suede shoes and ended up n an ambulance!!
I cant remember a thing, not even what i was drinking, apart from lying in the porch and my Mum laughin at me!!
Sex God
About 14, went to a house party at a friends' and we got stuck into their mum and dad's home made wine One glass of white, one glass of red and a glass of red and white mixed..... home made wine is stroooooong!!!
All i remember then is being violently sick in the downstairs bathroom and then feeling very ill for the rest of the night
:roll:
One glass of white, one glass of red and a glass of red and white mixed..... home made wine is stroooooong!!! All i remember then is being violently sick in the downstairs bathroom and then feeling very ill for the rest of the night
:roll: 
Sexpert
i was 15 and my mates parents were out for the night so we got stuck into his dads home brew.... never again.
all i can remember of the night is about 11 o clock i was slipping in and out of conciosness and throwing up violently.... and i have never touched home brew since.
all i can remember of the night is about 11 o clock i was slipping in and out of conciosness and throwing up violently
.... and i have never touched home brew since. I have only done the biggy once. We went to a birthday party, I think I was about 18 and we were told it was free drink for the first hour I remember trying to eat the food and not being able to get the fork to my mouth then nothing till I am sitting on a chair in the ladies. Head in the sink and spouting some crap about Ian not loving me now I was sick.
When they (I dunno who, some lady that worked in the hotel) decided I was safe to go home, I had to pee in the car park before I got in the car. Gets to Ians house and I couldn't even take my own dress off
There are evenings I don't fully know what happened such as my hen night but other than that, I don't get completely pissed
Dawn
I remember trying to eat the food and not being able to get the fork to my mouth then nothing till I am sitting on a chair in the ladies. Head in the sink and spouting some crap about Ian not loving me now I was sick.When they (I dunno who, some lady that worked in the hotel) decided I was safe to go home, I had to pee in the car park before I got in the car. Gets to Ians house and I couldn't even take my own dress off
There are evenings I don't fully know what happened such as my hen night but other than that, I don't get completely pissed
Dawn
Oooh I like this one - I was 12 and had just been to see The Rocky Horror Show (we got in as student hairdressers due to backcombed-to-the max Siouxsie style hair). Got home, my 16 yr old bruv was having a party in his room which I was dragged into, he handed me a pint of cider It was great not having to stagger far to bed!
My brother was a good babysitter
:lol:
It was great not having to stagger far to bed!My brother was a good babysitter
:lol: 19
My drinks were seriously spiked and I assaulted a bouncer getting myself thrown out of the club we were in .. thankfully my mate realised that I'd been missing a while and checked it all out ... I was found in a diabetic coma down the side of the club and spent the next week in hospital.
I'd never touched alcohol until that point... thankfully now I have a better tolerance but rarely drink to the point of tipseyness.
c x
My drinks were seriously spiked and I assaulted a bouncer getting myself thrown out of the club we were in .. thankfully my mate realised that I'd been missing a while and checked it all out ... I was found in a diabetic coma down the side of the club and spent the next week in hospital.
I'd never touched alcohol until that point... thankfully now I have a better tolerance but rarely drink to the point of tipseyness.
c x
oh mt word, it was a house party (a school one, you know the sort) I got pissed on Buckfast tonic wine..............and i got a girl pissed on it too, them were the days, 2 peeps, pissed on one bottle. I also remember sending a mate in to the shop to buy it (he was 18 i was 14 or 15) it only cost
I got me tops an everything.....great night...
I got me tops an everything.....great night...
OMFG -17 1/2, works xmas do ( Pinner Mc Donald's! ) Royal Oak pub in Harrow. 1/2 light ale, dbl vodka no ice or mixer, pint o' cider, and 1/3 litre ( probably a lot more ) of JD, straight out of a litre bottle I'd brought! :uhoh:
Worst night 'cos I pulled a co-worker ( that ended up shagging someone else a few months later, while I barely got to see her tits
) spewed me ring every half hour on the half hour and still don't know how I got home. :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:
Best bit - had to go to work 6am to open up, and I volunteered for it, because. :eeek: :doh: .." Yeah, alright Mark, I'll come in for the open, I don't drink! " Fair play to the mgr, still pissed from night before, he said my eyes were like 2 pissholes in the snow and gave me a job that took 4+hours and kept me away from food and people and other hangover nastyness
:therethere: :thumbup: Happy days
Worst night 'cos I pulled a co-worker ( that ended up shagging someone else a few months later, while I barely got to see her tits
) spewed me ring every half hour on the half hour and still don't know how I got home. :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: Best bit - had to go to work 6am to open up, and I volunteered for it, because. :eeek: :doh: .." Yeah, alright Mark, I'll come in for the open, I don't drink! " Fair play to the mgr, still pissed from night before, he said my eyes were like 2 pissholes in the snow and gave me a job that took 4+hours and kept me away from food and people and other hangover nastyness
:therethere: :thumbup: Happy days 
Sex God
hmmmm, well other than last night on the slappers night out, where far too much vodka was consumed by me...... (I didn't fall over or do anything embarassing tho.......I hope......)
has to be a few years ago at the birthday party of the club I work for. It was £10 entry and free drinks all night, except I managed to wangle the night off, not pay to get in and get drunker than I have been in my life! Approximately 10 black russians (vodka and tia maria with coke) later...(i had lost count by then) I managed to stumble to a sofa and sit on it for the rest of the night waiting for the club to close so I could get a lift home.
I spent all of the next day in bed, and was sent home from work ill on the folllowing day too! (Still didn't throw up or fall down, so wouldn't like to guess how much I'd have to drink to get to that stage!........must be my irish genes)
Good job I only drink a handful of times during the year!
has to be a few years ago at the birthday party of the club I work for. It was £10 entry and free drinks all night, except I managed to wangle the night off, not pay to get in and get drunker than I have been in my life! Approximately 10 black russians (vodka and tia maria with coke) later...(i had lost count by then) I managed to stumble to a sofa and sit on it for the rest of the night waiting for the club to close so I could get a lift home.
I spent all of the next day in bed, and was sent home from work ill on the folllowing day too! (Still didn't throw up or fall down, so wouldn't like to guess how much I'd have to drink to get to that stage!........must be my irish genes)
Good job I only drink a handful of times during the year!
My first time getting drunk... I was about 14 and managed to get in a pub with some older friends. Unfortunately I had never consumed the evil liquid before and it only took 3 halves of larger before I felt 'icky' and unfortunately chucked it all back up on the way home.
The first time I got really rat-arsed was shortly after joining a new company. They were having a rather large presentation evening and it was apparently the norm to abuse the all-night free bar. Everyone who came up to say hello got me a drink from the bar - almost to the point of being funnel-fed bacardi.
Just after the sit-down meal the MD came over to ask me how I was getting on. He squatted next to my chair. Before I had time to realise my mouth was actually projecting the thoughts in my head.... I parted my knees slightly, nodded downwards and said "while you're down there".
For a brief sobering moment, the thought of what I had just said made me think my career here is now over and I had better start on my CV in the morning. To my relief he saw it as the joke it was intended as, laughed and replied "Steady on the wife is over there"
Sometime later on he asked if I knew any good jokes. Being put on the spot and wishing to make amends, for some unknown reason I made one up
Me " I say, I say, I say.... what is the difference between sex with foreplay and sex without foreplay?"
MD " I don't know... what is the difference between sex with foreplay and sex without foreplay"
Me " If you don't know that... I ain't shagging you then!" :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:
The first time I got really rat-arsed was shortly after joining a new company. They were having a rather large presentation evening and it was apparently the norm to abuse the all-night free bar. Everyone who came up to say hello got me a drink from the bar - almost to the point of being funnel-fed bacardi.
Just after the sit-down meal the MD came over to ask me how I was getting on. He squatted next to my chair. Before I had time to realise my mouth was actually projecting the thoughts in my head.... I parted my knees slightly, nodded downwards and said "while you're down there".
For a brief sobering moment, the thought of what I had just said made me think my career here is now over and I had better start on my CV in the morning. To my relief he saw it as the joke it was intended as, laughed and replied "Steady on the wife is over there"
Sometime later on he asked if I knew any good jokes. Being put on the spot and wishing to make amends, for some unknown reason I made one up
Me " I say, I say, I say.... what is the difference between sex with foreplay and sex without foreplay?"
MD " I don't know... what is the difference between sex with foreplay and sex without foreplay"
Me " If you don't know that... I ain't shagging you then!" :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:
Master of Sex
14 the local disco run by the police
cider that was called triple vintage, i don't think you can get it anymore
cider that was called triple vintage, i don't think you can get it anymore
13 family-friend's wedding. Tequila shots (cos I thought I was hardcore) don't know how many... and some beer. all courtesy of my evil older cousin. Had my first cigarette then too...
mum found out the next day and ooooooh was I in trouble. She didn't take to the:" but I feel horrible enough already as punishment" argument.
mum found out the next day and ooooooh was I in trouble. She didn't take to the:" but I feel horrible enough already as punishment" argument.
Sex God
That'll be tonight then.
John
John
Sex God
Quote by PoloLady
When was the first time you got really legless, totally smashed, rat-arsed?
Where were you?
What were you drinking and what happened?
I was 14. In a bar in Barcelona with my brother, who was 15. We'd been drinking watered down wine at home for as long as we could remember, and figured we were all grown up and ready for the hard stuff, so we hit the cheapest spirit we could find, a Spanish toxic waste product which was called Cognac but was actually rocket fuel.
I remember the Germans being offended by the nazi salutes, and I remember wishing someone had opened the patio door before I walked through it, but to this day I have no idea how I got to that police station, and the scar on my John Thomas remains a mystery. :shock:
Sex God
Quote by PoloLady
When was the first time you got really legless, totally smashed, rat-arsed?
Where were you?
What were you drinking and what happened?
Remember it very well.
I was in a snooker hall above Burtons and was 16. I had just been paid my first weeks wage, the pricely sum of £10:20 and got absolutely hammered on Macs Mild, truth be known it was probably no more than abot 5 or 6 pints, but it was my first real drink outside of the odd half pint of light ale at christmas. I remember collapsing into the urinal channel in the toilets and being taken home smelling of piss and bleach blocks with my mothers words ringing in my ears as the other lads dragged me up to my room................"HE BETTER NOT OF SPENT MY £3:00 HOUSEKEEPING MONEY!!"
It was 3 weeks before my 21st on my stag night.
Bacardi and coke, don't ask me how many!!!
At closing time I stood up walked to my brothers car, got in, window down. Brother drove me home, I chucked up on the bank out side the back door.
Laid across the bed with my head over a bucket.
Brother was worried, thought I was going to sound of my breathing reverberating in the bucket helped him sleep.
Got married the next day, coulkdn't eat anything till about teatime and that was only trifle.
Bacardi and coke, don't ask me how many!!!
At closing time I stood up walked to my brothers car, got in, window down. Brother drove me home, I chucked up on the bank out side the back door.
Laid across the bed with my head over a bucket.
Brother was worried, thought I was going to sound of my breathing reverberating in the bucket helped him sleep.
Got married the next day, coulkdn't eat anything till about teatime and that was only trifle.
