WHY | Swinging Heaven

11 Aug 2005

Quote by debz4u
Ok no she is looking for nsa sex club meets and realy is genuine but after that a polite no thank you would have made her feel better instead of feeling you know used

Sorry to sound harsh but if your friend feels used maybe NSA meets are not for her.... maybe she should re-consider her attitudes to swinging and try to attract men who want regular fuck buddies?
True NSA meets that are clearly one-offs may be very nice at the time, both parties may have a ball, say thanks at the end of the night, and then go back to thier respective lives with wry smiles on their faces. That is all. There usually isn't further contact. In fact, when one party attempts further contact it just gets annoying. That is why many ardent NSA swingers have a swinging phone so it is easy to ignore people who do not really understand the idea of NSA.
redface

Giving my naughty past away here badly. I should probably shut up before someone hits me :P

11 Aug 2005

Can I just say it's not just single guys who do it. It's happened to me twice with couples, both from the photo ads section. One of them it was agreed that photos could be taken as long as i was sent a set, never heard from them again. The other one was after exchanging details phone no & weeks of chat to arrange things we had a very pleasant evening with a promise of more to come, you guessed it dissapeared. Wouldn't mind that so much but why promise something, would have been easier to just say thanks bye.
So while I sympathise with your plight please don't think it's just us single guys that do it.

11 Aug 2005

right i am just starting out on the swinging scene,
I am hoping to meet some nice friends to chat and play with
but lets face it, many people on here and who advertise only
want casual sex.
geniuine swingers will want to keep relationships better but
some will only want the one thing.
I feel for the lady in question, how rude of this man not to reply
or even to say thanks for a nice night but not again.
politness costs nothing and honesty is the best policy.
keep safe and be happy in your next encounter.
lisamarie

11 Aug 2005

Quote by prags
Can I just say it's not just single guys who do it. It's happened to me twice with couples, both from the photo ads section. One of them it was agreed that photos could be taken as long as i was sent a set, never heard from them again. The other one was after exchanging details phone no & weeks of chat to arrange things we had a very pleasant evening with a promise of more to come, you guessed it dissapeared. Wouldn't mind that so much but why promise something, would have been easier to just say thanks bye.
So while I sympathise with your plight please don't think it's just us single guys that do it.

Yeah, take it from an (ex wink

) git that situations like that is bad form. Certainly if pics are taken you do deserve copies and failing to respond when they agreed to a future meet is bad, very bad......... but in this game... trust no-one.... :shock:
Did I ever tell you about the bloke who, after a clear email from me afterwards saying it was a one-off (I was in a good mood considering he was a crap shag - though I spared his feelings and didn't tell him that) decided to email me three times a day and ring me up to 30 times EVERY DAY for TWO MONTHS :shock: :shock: :shock: ... sad or what...... :shock:

11 Aug 2005

Quote by LisaMarie
right i am just starting out on the swinging scene,
I am hoping to meet some nice friends to chat and play with
but lets face it, many people on here and who advertise only
want casual sex.
geniuine swingers will want to keep relationships better but
some will only want the one thing.
I feel for the lady in question, how rude of this man not to reply
or even to say thanks for a nice night but not again.
politness costs nothing and honesty is the best policy.
keep safe and be happy in your next encounter.
lisamarie

Lisa, there are also genuine people who don't want to 'keep relationships'. The difference is in how they want to swing, not in their genuineness. Your post reads as if you think that the ones who 'only want the one thing' aren't genuine. Sorry if I've misunderstood.
A'thank you' might have been nice but the lady could have said that at the time; I'm sure most would at least feel obliged to return the thanks when face to face. Debz, did your friend say 'thanks'?

11 Aug 2005

Thanks blue you do make sense i hope she reads all whats written.
And sorry if i have gone on a bit on her behalf .
And me i have lots of nsa fun that way your under no illusions

11 Aug 2005

Quote by LisaMarie
right i am just starting out on the swinging scene,
I am hoping to meet some nice friends to chat and play with
but lets face it, many people on here and who advertise only
want casual sex.
geniuine swingers will want to keep relationships better but
some will only want the one thing.
I feel for the lady in question, how rude of this man not to reply
or even to say thanks for a nice night but not again.
politness costs nothing and honesty is the best policy.
keep safe and be happy in your next encounter.
lisamarie

Maybe when you have some experience of the swinging scene you will have more idea of what "genuine" swingers want. After nearly 5 years on the scene we can probably count ourselves as "genuine swingers". However, we do not look for any form of relationship with anyone...we have a very satisfactory one of those at home. We look for as much casual sex as we can get and are happy to admit it but we are not averse to making friends with people on the way.... but sex is the goal and friendship is the bonus. If we just wanted friends we would go to the pub. Having said that our social circle is made up almost entirely of swingers, all met through casual sex.

11 Aug 2005

Quote by northwest-cpl
As a single guy, if you get 2 or 3 meets out of 1 couple you are quite possibly doing very well, especially if you meet via the ads rather than a club.

That's quite cheering then ! I always find it hard approaching couples in clubs, usually because there are so many singles around, so yes most have been via ads.

Quote by northwest-cpl
However, we would never suggest that it was anything more than a one-off nsa when we first play and repeats and friendship are a bonus.

Absolutely the way it should be. As Vicky has said though, it's only polite to at least say thanks!!
Ant

11 Aug 2005

Quote by antwest99
As Vicky has said though, it's only polite to at least say thanks!!
Ant

And politeness costs nothing. (as my mum used to say)

11 Aug 2005

Quote by antwest99
Absolutely the way it should be. As Vicky has said though, it's only polite to at least say thanks!!
Ant

There are lots of guys, and some couples that don't say thanks though. It's the cum and run syndrome. If we allowed ourselves to worry about it then we would stop playing ... it's part and parcel of swinging. It takes all sorts, but they just get removed from the Christmas card list.
One of the problems that singles have to put up with is the possible lack of chatting about the experience afterwards. As a couple we can relive it, talk about the good bits and the bad bits. Unless a single arranges a repeat meet then there may well be noone to share the experience with.

11 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
So ditching the SIM card and getting another one is not a good way to handle situations like this then?

Nah.... not when you can use the work email directory to fnd out all you need biggrin

:D

11 Aug 2005

Quote by antwest99

So ditching the SIM card and getting another one is not a good way to handle situations like this then?

Nah.... not when you can use the work email directory to fnd out all you need biggrin

:D
Ooooooo you sneaky bugger lol

11 Aug 2005

Quote by wolvie_dude
As Vicky has said though, it's only polite to at least say thanks!!
Ant

And politeness costs nothing. (as my mum used to say)
Well yep.... agreed.... in a perfect world that is true. But I've often found that playing with groups in clubs it isn't really appropriate or possible to say thanks to everyone :shock: . And if the person is a crap shag I would find it very hard to say thanks anyway... it would be a lie and would be said through gritted teeth lol

.... However, if a particular individual is a good shag I will say thanks, or shake their hand, or whatever is most fitting at the time.
With private meets, yeah I would say thanks.... but I wouldn't ever have bothered to follow that up with a later email to say thanks again. That would only open a false dialogue and give the guy hope that the meet might be repeated, which it most probably would not be.

11 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
Did I ever tell you about the bloke who, after a clear email from me afterwards saying it was a one-off (I was in a good mood considering he was a crap shag - though I spared his feelings and didn't tell him that) decided to email me three times a day and ring me up to 30 times EVERY DAY for TWO MONTHS :shock: :shock: :shock: ... sad or what...... :shock:

Not until now !!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:
Names should be hinted at for that amazingly thick behaviour.
I give up after 2 reminders as 1 email could easily go astray (and I am also owed a set of photos by one couple.... evil

)
Ant

11 Aug 2005

Quote by freckledbird

So ditching the SIM card and getting another one is not a good way to handle situations like this then?

Nah.... not when you can use the work email directory to fnd out all you need biggrin

:D
Ooooooo you sneaky bugger lol

Working in bloody IT has to have some advantages !!!

11 Aug 2005

Quote by antwest99

Did I ever tell you about the bloke who, after a clear email from me afterwards saying it was a one-off (I was in a good mood considering he was a crap shag - though I spared his feelings and didn't tell him that) decided to email me three times a day and ring me up to 30 times EVERY DAY for TWO MONTHS :shock: :shock: :shock: ... sad or what...... :shock:

Not until now !!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:
Names should be hinted at for that amazingly thick behaviour.
I give up after 2 reminders as 1 email could easily go astray (and I am also owed a set of photos by one couple.... evil

)
Ant
Hehehehehehehehehe........ Nige from Manchester, if you're reading this, the reason why I never returned your calls for two months is cos you were a crap shag, just in case you always wondered..... hehehehehehehehe.... :twisted: ........ It was highly amusing at the time. He was ringing my swinging phone that I only used for sex anyway..... to turn it on once a day to pick up 30 missed calls kept me in laughs for weeks rotflmao

... I almost missed him when he stopped ringing.... I felt empty inside and had no purpose in life :haha:
In edit..... not guilty at all for naming and shaming............ oh I'm still a git, aren't I :twisted: :twisted: :twisted: lol

:lol: :lol:

11 Aug 2005

aaaww... poor nige.. all you would have to do now to really destroy him would be to tell him his dick was really small as well..... :twisted:

11 Aug 2005

Quote by wolvie_dude
aaaww... poor nige.. all you would have to do now to really destroy him would be to tell him his dick was really small as well..... :twisted:

No, actually... his dick was pretty big.... big dicks aren't good, plus the fact that he was crap at using it did not bode well for a good night's swinging, in fact he should have got the message when I kicked him out saying I wanted to watch the Pop Idol final

If the guy really is reading this, how crushed is he going to be :rotflmao:

11 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
However, if a particular individual is a good shag I will say thanks, or shake their hand, or whatever is most fitting at the time.
.

Shake their hand confused

: now that is realy being polite lol

considering what has just gone on :grin:

11 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
aaaww... poor nige.. all you would have to do now to really destroy him would be to tell him his dick was really small as well..... :twisted:

No, actually... his dick was pretty big.... big dicks aren't good, plus the fact that he was crap at using it did not bode well for a good night's swinging, in fact he should have got the message when I kicked him out saying I wanted to watch the Pop Idol final

If the guy really is reading this, how crushed is he going to be :rotflmao:
I can just see him, forlornly looking at the ground, as the door shuts in his face to the sound of Michelle McManus (or whichever other winner it was) warbling in the background.. :rotflmao:

11 Aug 2005

Quote by Phoenix
However, if a particular individual is a good shag I will say thanks, or shake their hand, or whatever is most fitting at the time.
.

Shake their hand confused

: now that is realy being polite lol

considering what has just gone on :grin:
Shaking hands is only reserved for REALLY good shags. After a near-perfect group shag with 4 guys in Cupids one night, the "ring leader" of the group came up to me at the bar later and said thanks. I took his hand and shook it without even thinking really. I have done the same ever since as a kind of nice gesture. I think it comes from my kickboxing days when we would shake hands after a really good sparring session :shock:
OK, I really am saying too much.... feeling a tad embarrassed at my quirky club behaviour now redface

11 Aug 2005

I agree with wishmaster.
I replied toa an ad, a female one, and all I got was an automated email fro advertising a website.
You're gonna get this whatever you do so I think it's just a case of perservering and you'll find an honest one amongst the rubbish .
Have fun and hope t hasn't spoilt things to much.
Paul.

11 Aug 2005

big dicks arn't good

there's hope for me yet biggrin

11 Aug 2005

lol Mark, me to then!
God bless the smaller willy!

11 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
I think it comes from my kickboxing days

remind me to NEVER annoy bluexxx if we ever meet :boxing: lol

12 Aug 2005

Quote by wolvie_dude
I think it comes from my kickboxing days

remind me to NEVER annoy bluexxx if we ever meet :boxing: lol

Well, don't worry... I'll shake your hand after I've kicked your arse :grin:

12 Aug 2005

Quote by roger743
I've nothing against casual sex, but if that's all it is then people shouldn't dress it up with expressions of undying love. (For real!) I tend to hear such things and get confused, y'know? And ladies, if you wake up the next morning and it's all being a horrible mistake, then picking up the phone when it rings and saying "hi, look I'm sorry, I might have got a wee bit carried away last night..." is the absolute best way of handling it. Blame it on the beer if it makes it more credible. Much better than just letting me keep ringing and ringing and not picking up.

:laughabove:
Good to see you're still on form Roger!

12 Aug 2005

Quote by bluexxx
I think it comes from my kickboxing days

remind me to NEVER annoy bluexxx if we ever meet :boxing: lol

Well, don't worry... I'll shake your hand after I've kicked your arse :grin:
And then kick me out of the door saying "Nothing personal, but I just HAVE to watch celebrity who wants to be a millionaire"

:rotflmao: :rotflmao: :rotflmao:

12 Aug 2005

Quote by wolvie_dude
I think it comes from my kickboxing days

remind me to NEVER annoy bluexxx if we ever meet :boxing: lol

My sentiments exactly. Memo to self, steer clear of Cuipds and Chorley when Bluexxx is in a bad mood wink

12 Aug 2005

Quote by Phoenix
I think it comes from my kickboxing days

remind me to NEVER annoy bluexxx if we ever meet :boxing: lol

My sentiments exactly. Memo to self, steer clear of Cuipds and Chorley when Bluexxx is in a bad mood wink

You're quite safe in Cupids these days... since I got barred for kicking someone's arse, well OK, not his arse, just his beer glass, but it should have been his arse :twisted: .... and no, that guy did not get a hand shake :P :P :P :P