women, unwilling swing partners?

5 Nov 2009

I think in general men are the ones that suggest it first, maybe they are more deviant of nature, that is not saying woman are not.
My hubby suggested it a long time ago, and when I thought about it after the seed had been planted, I to thought it could be good fun.
Does this mean I was talked into it, no it means we then have a way to talk about it in an mature adult fashion.
Why people think women have to be talked into these things I haven't a clue, do these same people not think we have a mind of our own? wink

I think there are loads of women out there that would like to have the type of freedom I have within a relationship, but through upbringing and moral thought might not address it or act upon it first, until the seed has been planted.

5 Nov 2009

I think it goes back to the old, if you are a bloke and you have lots of partners you are a stud, but if you are a woman you are a slut etc..
Men are generally more opened about sex, what they like want etc. They also see sex as a more physically activty, so there is less emotion about it.
This all seems to make it easier for it to be the men that want to get started with swinging.
Though times are slowly changing. It is becoming more acceptable for women to have more than one sexual partner, it is becoming easier for them to talk about sex. So there are more and more women that feel that can be the ones pushing the couple into this scene..

5 Nov 2009

Quote by Kaznkev
there is no smoke without fire. i have never seen what i thought was a reluctant male swinger. i have seen many many women who i have sensed are only there because they feel they have to be (for whatever reason). im not suggesting all or most of women are unwilling swinging partners but they are not that rare.
go to rios on any saturday couples night and you will see a few women sitting in teh cornwer avoiding everyone whilst their husband/partner trawls the place for action with couples.

I too have seen the women who need to be pissed first,
total incomprehension on so many levels :confused:
would much rather kev played without me than spend a night somewhere i dont want to be,and this has been the case,esp with gay men,when my libido has been low
I have noticed that more and more women are on the prowl in clubs while it is the men sitting in the corners nursing a drink... So I do not think it is fair to say that men are the ones that are always up for it

5 Nov 2009

You never really know what peoples motivations are really do you.
I accept that you can think folk aren't that keen or that one is keener than the other but given the transitory and artificial nature of most swinging encounters I find it bloody hard to judge somebody else's feelings.
Having said that if I do get a very strong sense that any party is less than keen I'm happy to put my clothes on and fill the kettle just as I am happy to not follow up a social meet if the couple treat each other with anything other than deep respect.
And that applies to lasses as much as blokes. Although I can see that there are possibly more unwilling females than males for the reasons stated by others.

5 Nov 2009

Having a meet where either of the couple were less than up for it would put me right off. It has to be that everyone wants it otherwise its little more than unpaid prostitution of either sex.

5 Nov 2009

Quote by brucie
there is no smoke without fire. i have never seen what i thought was a reluctant male swinger. i have seen many many women who i have sensed are only there because they feel they have to be (for whatever reason). im not suggesting all or most of women are unwilling swinging partners but they are not that rare.
go to rios on any saturday couples night and you will see a few women sitting in teh cornwer avoiding everyone whilst their husband/partner trawls the place for action with couples.

I've met one. Single guy at a club who was persuaded to give it a go by some mates. Despite being quite sought after, it just "wasn't his thing."
We had an incredibly fun evening "acting" sex- and got a round of applause for the show as we left the room. I was hoping for a bafta...

5 Nov 2009

worlass and I are both very reluctant.

5 Nov 2009

I see quite a few ads where the guy wants someone to seduce his wife in a hotel bar or pub bar and she doesn't know anything about it :shock:
While I realise it is some peoples fantasy it does make you think if the woman really is totally unaware of her partners intentions....

5 Nov 2009

Quote by splendid_
worlass and I are both very reluctant.

Yeah...it's been nearly 4 years and I'm still trying rolleyes

<<<<<<< pmsl...I just turned into Markz lol

5 Nov 2009

It could be that "normal" people assume women dont have a naughty side and are pushed into it by the male.
In my limited experiance it only takes a little nudge and and the fem can see the plus sides in it. But then I guess its down to the person and what their moral stand is, I've spoke to mates about what I get upto and they look horrified and others ask all about it.
As was said the laides are changing and I have been approached by girls in pubs and clubs asking if I would like to join them and a mate or bf. But I think the footballers "spit roasts" of the early 2000's brought group sex into the lime light and what the stars do everybody else seems to follow.
So I guess in the 2.4 children house hold where everything is on the moral high ground, then us pervy men are the driving force behind our sordid fun! :twisted:

5 Nov 2009

Quote by Kaznkev
there is no smoke without fire. i have never seen what i thought was a reluctant male swinger. i have seen many many women who i have sensed are only there because they feel they have to be (for whatever reason). im not suggesting all or most of women are unwilling swinging partners but they are not that rare.
go to rios on any saturday couples night and you will see a few women sitting in teh cornwer avoiding everyone whilst their husband/partner trawls the place for action with couples.

I too have seen the women who need to be pissed first,
total incomprehension on so many levels :confused:
would much rather kev played without me than spend a night somewhere i dont want to be,and this has been the case,esp with gay men,when my libido has been low
Its true that 5 years ago when we first looked at the scene Mrs Tweeky had to be coaxed along to our first munch with many promises that this was just a party. After about an hour and a half she had already had 3 snogs dunno

Sometimes those of us in long term relationships just know what the other half wants even if they dont biggrin

Maybe those nervy looking females spring to life later on.
Being pissed no but neither of us would enter swinging situations of any kind without a drink or two. Everything we have done in swinging circles has been social munches socials etc its just part and parcel for us. Weve never managed a club visit but sure if we did we would both have a jar or two :cheers:

5 Nov 2009

Quote by Firelizard
worlass and I are both very reluctant.

Yeah...it's been nearly 4 years and I'm still trying rolleyes

<<<<<<< pmsl...I just turned into Markz lol

Does he often pee himself when he laughs? :roll: