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You know you need to spend more time....

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You know you really should spend more time with the kids...
when they start complaining because dinner time over-lapese with their desired tv viewing schedule confused
Call in Social Services
:twisted: Now how to get their bedtime to over-lap with their viewing time :?:
smackbottom :smackbottom: :smackbottom: :smackbottom:
You bad momma,
now go and get'em in to bed quick bolt
they're overlapping with your surfin time :twisted:
I always favour the barrel method of raising children.
Sprog directly into barrel :shock:, feed through bunghole :twisted:. When they're 18...
... drive the bung in ;)
biggrin
Quote by Libra-Love
You know you really should spend more time with the kids...
when they start complaining because dinner time over-lapese with their desired tv viewing schedule confused
Call in Social Services
:twisted: Now how to get their bedtime to over-lap with their viewing time :?:

Simple solution to a simple problem:
1) Dont feed kids they come to expect it
2) Dont let them watch telly its evil anyway and is all (non-reality based) reality tv shows!
Then they wont complain about either and if they complain just tell them they aint as bad as the kids in the NSPCC adverts yet!! And tell them childline doesnt exist anymore!
Interesting fact though I just found out a week or so ago from an afterschool care teacher was telling me as she is currently doing her social care degree.
It isnt actually illegal (not sure if this is just scottish law) to leave your children in the house alone from the day they are born + as long as they are not neglected and in any danger!?? How the hell does that make any sense! Stupid legal loopholes no wonder so many parents actually do get away with abusing their kids! evil
Quote by fruity1976
It isnt actually illegal (not sure if this is just scottish law) to leave your children in the house alone from the day they are born + as long as they are not neglected and in any danger!??

They're perfectly safe in a barrel.
Quote by pendant
They're perfectly safe in a barrel.

Not once you start adding the water :twisted:
ROFL... water? Sarge's caravan gets emptied regularly, I understand :twisted:
(sorry for the cross-threading, just couldn't resist)
should that be freezing water? :twisted:
Quote by fruity1976
should that be freezing water? :twisted:

Ideally, yes, that helps to give the darlings some exercise. biggrin
Good point it is advised to exercise the little darlings regularly, tis even on the school curriculum some say lol
I prefer the rope tied to a pole routine for that one though!! Much more entertaining for me and if i feel the need to speed her up i just use the hose! ;)
Actually - to be on a lighthearted thread - I get the overwelming impression that there are some very clued up,caring,loving parents on here.
OMG - now EVERYBODYS gonna CRY..
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:
We're all gonna need group sex:
hump :hump: :hump: :hump: :hump: :hump: :hump: :hump:
Oh - sorry - I meant a GROUP HUG!
:therethere: :therethere: :therethere: :therethere: :therethere: :therethere:
Quote by fruity1976
It isnt actually illegal (not sure if this is just scottish law) to leave your children in the house alone from the day they are born + as long as they are not neglected and in any danger!?? How the hell does that make any sense! Stupid legal loopholes no wonder so many parents actually do get away with abusing their kids! evil

I've been told that to... you can only be prosecuted if any harm comes to the child. Obviously I have NEVER run to the shops while my darling daughter is fast asleep tucked up in bed :gagged: :dry:
You can be prosecuted if the child is put at risk, it need not be harmed.
Quote by Libra-Love
You know you really should spend more time with the kids...

When you can type all the SH Forum emoticons from memory but you can't remember the kids names lol
Nice one, cu@10:57! biggrin