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Cohen__The__Barbarian
Over 90 days ago
Male

Forum

I'm off to keep an eye on you children - but I won't be back to reply, just keeping an eye on you
Feisty_Fiona and Bast- truly a pleasue ladies
Memnoch and Sauron - behave yourselves, otherwise itll be all fun and games, until someone loses and eye.
I'm offski for a pint and a pipe bolt and my little hidy hole
Quote by joolen
who is that imposter in the ramparts of the towers seise him behead him at once

Got him...shame that doggy aint 'round 'ere, got a nice bit of grub left over
Quote by joolen
DID someone mention bones

Only to feed cerebus - but you're quite safe, he's already been slaughtered
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
:idea: when we catch Mem and Sour face, shall we treat em to a back sack n crack wax? just the job i reckon - make em scream good n proper :twisted:

Give them young shavers the full monty - head to toe :twisted: lol
ahhhhhhhh tie em down and wax em....bliss...they won't dare set foot in SH Towers tonight. I'm off to bed, Jason will be along shortly to take over guard duty - come join me when he gets here :twisted:
I'll be please to do so, young lady - and I won't disappear for piquet duty tonight :rascal:
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
:idea: when we catch Mem and Sour face, shall we treat em to a back sack n crack wax? just the job i reckon - make em scream good n proper :twisted:

Give them young shavers the full monty - head to toe :twisted: lol
Quote by Bast

My back, please!

Are we into Swedish Massage or Discoworld massage ???
The choice is yours ladies - any massage will do me the world of good right now
Shall we try Aussie Massage then??
It's similar to Swedish Massage but Down Under :twisted:
:gagged: innocent
Quote by Bast

My back, please!

Are we into Swedish Massage or Discoworld massage ???
The choice is yours ladies - any massage will do me the world of good right now
Quote by Bast
ohhhh Cohen my hero :inlove:

*Cohen bows, slowly, but respectfully*
Back still playing you up Cohen?????
Think this greasing is done .......... what next?
My back, please!
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
Bast, grease is better than listening to old Mem and Sore spouting how tuff they are innit.
Cohen, be a good lad and get some nails from the shed will ya, to stick in this grease

I got a better idea for the nails - lets weld them together ( 3 at a time ) and make caltrops :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
good idea (had to look up what they were first tho redface )
Don't worry about that young lady, I wouldn't expect a damsel like yourself to be aware of all the arts of war ( no disrespect intended, mind )
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
Bast, grease is better than listening to old Mem and Sore spouting how tuff they are innit.
Cohen, be a good lad and get some nails from the shed will ya, to stick in this grease

I got a better idea for the nails - lets weld them together ( 3 at a time ) and make caltrops :twisted: :twisted: :twisted:
Quote by Bast

Is there anything else you'd like me to help you with, young lady?

if you're not helping with the Greasing ... can you dance like John Travolta whilst we carry on????
:giggle:
I'm sorry young lady, my dancing days are long gone - and I know you jest wink
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
Cohen don't sulk, ya know we loves ya, you were just takin ya time, as usual. come and help me with this grease

Well young lady, I knows you have proper respect for me, so certainly...I just don't like the lack of respect from ingrates that should know better ( or at least know when to shut up ).
Is there anything else you'd like me to help you with, young lady?
Quote by Arwen_Evenstar
oh no... he carries me off to his dwelling.... (needs a new air wick) What is to become of me???

Still don't need my help???
Quote by Arwen_Evenstar
oh Thankyou Fiona... I knew I could rely on another lady to help me

Thanks! There I was on me way over to help, and you think I'm not reliable enuff to help - that's the trouble with young ladies today, expect rescuing yesterday, don't understand you need to give a little time to raise tension ( and to understand what they will be left with if they piss off the hero they're with )
Quote by Arwen_Evenstar
Can someone please resue me from the clutches of Sauron?????? he smells....

Kick 'im in the cods - he won't be clutching you for too long!
Quote by Memnoch

Reek is the word...

... is the word that you heard
It's got groove, it's got meaning
Reek is the time, is the place, is the motion
Reek is the way we are...
Oops, wrong masquerade
Sorry.
For that I'll get you a drink...
Quote by Jason Wheresmyargonaughts
AND I'LL CARRY YOUR WAGGING TONGUE TO KEEP THEM CLEAN! mad :x :x

So you brought your wheel-barrow then? lol :lol: :lol: :lol:
Hello Jason, you enjoy your food?
Quote by Sauron
I'm off to devour some more puny Souls,
But I will return..even now the armies of darkness are converging on SH Towers..take strength from you fellow weaklings in your hour of need.

So what you saying is...you can't take the heat so you are flouncing off!!! Ha ha ha ha
Quote by Sauron
Thy humour I sense is a defence in your fear of the shadow of my almightyness,
You are correct in your trepidation, for all the world trembles at my feet.

Look, is this just a roundabout fancy way of saaying you've got a 10" todger and the eartyh will move?
Yawnnnnnnnnnnnnn rolleyes
If you must know i am tall so correspondingly I have an 1.8" weapon at my disposal, do you not fear this awesome appendage wench.
That's closer to the truth ain't it sonny? Tell the truth and shame the devil
Quote by Sauron
Come Memnoch, let us feast on these weak humans and reek havoc.

Something certainly reeks - have a wash sonny and do the young ladies a favour, eh?
Quote by Sauron
Thy humour I sense is a defence in your fear of the shadow of my almightyness,
You are correct in your trepidation, for all the world trembles at my feet.

E-N-G-L-I-S-H Sonny!!! Pally vos englishy mad
Quote by Memnoch
A piece of advice Memnoch from one Evil doer to another,
Get yourself a Palantir thou wilt be able to see all from afar and catch the miscreants trying to escape thy prisons.

Ah bollocks, I left it at home.
Oops, I mean...
By the flames of Hades, in My haste to crush these pitiful pixies and halfwit halflings I didst not tarry for such accoutrements. It matters not. With thee as My ally and the massed minions of hell about to join us (Oh yes, they really are... hello?), We shall visit upon these puny puppets the ravages of our merciless conquest.
Prepare for Armageddon!
C'mon boy, come on in and have a pint and join us - you'll probably do more damage if you're with us
Quote by Sauron
Feisty_Fiona,
You have no idea of the depths of my perversions ...but young lady you will soon find out for yourself..Shagrat my captain of the Urequai is tracking you as we speak..you do not have long make your peace with your gods.

Sorry sonny, you'll have to speak English - it's what we do 'round 'ere
Arf arf..that from a vertically challenged jewish neanderthal man
I told you before, big nose - or have you recovered from that kicking
What eye sees all, not your Jap's Eye, obviously, that stays in your strides
Quote by Sauron
Feisty_Fiona,
You have no idea of the depths of my perversions ...but young lady you will soon find out for yourself..Shagrat my captain of the Urequai is tracking you as we speak..you do not have long make your peace with your gods.

Sorry sonny, you'll have to speak English - it's what we do 'round 'ere
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
Citizens of SHTowers, pay afriggintention!
I have the first hostage of the night. She goes by the name of Feisty Fiona, and a right screamer she is too. She will be slaughtered at dawn slow and painfully if you do not hand over to us the keys to the Towers!
M

You bloody liar! I am NOT a screamer mad
PS, M, i escaped, i had the keys concealed about my person and you never thought to search me did ya, pillock rolleyes
Evening young lady, nice to see you - sleep well last night?
OH Cohen, I did, after i got well shagged anyway. Didn't you hear me snoring gently in your ear?
I am afraid I did not young lady, I was standing guard over the towers and yourself - not close to hear your contented sleepy mumbles, which I truely regret, mi'lady
Quote by Sauron
Citizens of SHTowers, pay afriggintention!
I have the first hostage of the night. She goes by the name of Feisty Fiona, and a right screamer she is too. She will be slaughtered at dawn slow and painfully if you do not hand over to us the keys to the Towers!
M

Can I watch..i love to see fair maidens sorted
You can fugg off an' all
Strong words from a bandy legged jewish caveman. :!:
Not as strong as the kicking you'll be getting from me boot, sonny!
Quote by Feisty_Fiona
Citizens of SHTowers, pay afriggintention!
I have the first hostage of the night. She goes by the name of Feisty Fiona, and a right screamer she is too. She will be slaughtered at dawn slow and painfully if you do not hand over to us the keys to the Towers!
M

You bloody liar! I am NOT a screamer mad
PS, M, i escaped, i had the keys concealed about my person and you never thought to search me did ya, pillock rolleyes
Evening young lady, nice to see you - sleep well last night?