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Quote by Eli the Ugly
I dunno eet seeems to feet youa quita wella Heh! Heh!
Yeh, I was only having a bit of a laugh like. Most people realise this.
Dunno what his problem is, just cos I pulled more than he did there's no need to hate me for it. I can't help it, it's just me, the girls seem to like a straight up guy. And that's what I am, no pretences, just me, David Brent, friend as well as boss.
Ahhhhhhhh guys I'm back!!!!!
Sorry I had to go and leave you in the lurch like that. You know what it's like, so many people inviting me to places all day. I can't let them down, they like to have a bit of a joker at their do's, it gets everyone relaxed and in the party mood. Back now, hope you didn't miss me too much.
Sorry I had to go and leave you in the lurch like that. You know what it's like, so many people inviting me to places all day. I can't let them down, they like to have a bit of a joker at their do's, it gets everyone relaxed and in the party mood. Back now, hope you didn't miss me too much.
Thank you Lucrezia, much respect to you. If you could just hold on for one minute I will be right back - hold my pint too can you please.
*saunters over to the lads*
Alright lads, look I may not be around much later. The one and only David BRENT has pulled, he he he .... and get this ........ She wants to sup my sahcks!!! oooooooooeeeeeeerrr he he he
struts back
Thank you Lucrezia, so what's a nice young lady like you doing in a place like this then?
*saunters over to the lads*
Quote by lucrezia borgia
Perhaps we can sup some sahcks instead.
Alright lads, look I may not be around much later. The one and only David BRENT has pulled, he he he .... and get this ........ She wants to sup my sahcks!!! oooooooooeeeeeeerrr he he he
struts back
Thank you Lucrezia, so what's a nice young lady like you doing in a place like this then?
Neil my maaaaaaan! he he he
I'll have a lager, bit of a nutter when I get on it. Not in a violent way, just a headcase me eh.
So, can I have a word mate?
Over here ...... *whispers* So which birds around here are the easy ones eh? Don't really want to buy drinks for the frigid ones. I have a lot of respect for the frigid ones mind you, they've got morals and all that - I just don't want to waste my money on em
I'll have a lager, bit of a nutter when I get on it. Not in a violent way, just a headcase me eh.
So, can I have a word mate?
Over here ...... *whispers* So which birds around here are the easy ones eh?
Don't really want to buy drinks for the frigid ones. I have a lot of respect for the frigid ones mind you, they've got morals and all that - I just don't want to waste my money on em Yeh, ok Miss Bennett. We seem to have got off on the wrong foot there. Just having a laugh you know. I'm not like that really, just ask my mates ...... second thoughts don't, theyre a right bunch of nutters he he he. Will drop me in it by telling you how I always have a laugh with the ladies.
Funny enough, I've been called Mr Darcy a few times. Can't see the resemblance myself, but, they say your mates see things in you that you can't see yourself. So it must be there. What do you reckon?
Funny enough, I've been called Mr Darcy a few times. Can't see the resemblance myself, but, they say your mates see things in you that you can't see yourself. So it must be there. What do you reckon?
Quote by Elizabeth Bennett
That pistol you are fingering - rather dainty - is quite amazing how small they can make them.
Miss E Bennett
Virginal Spinster of this Parish
He he, nice one Liz, can call you Liz can't I, feel like we are friends now. Bit more familiar than Elizabeth - such a hard name. Not being insulting of couse, lots of nice Elizabeths around. It just sounds so butch, Liz is far prettier.
Quote by Eli the Ugly
Excusa me - I shoot your boll***s offa eh? I'ma Ugly and I eata tha Chilli Huh!
Oooooh get him. Know what they say about blokes in big hats eh?
You don't? Well, big hat, little willy. Only wants to shoot my balls off because he's jealous I've got some - and very full ones at that ladies he he he
Look mate, I don't want trouble. I know your type, had a mexican friend a while ago. Were good mates too, had to sack him tho, he wouldn't learn proper English. All for you guys coming over here and working for us, hell of a lot cheaper, respect to you and all that. But just don't cause trouble eh? Not in front of the ladies.
Quote by Elizabeth Bennett
Mr Bent.
In this area - quite often a gentleman's surname is linked to his nature.
So, would we make of your name?
Look the name is BRENT ok, they just buggered it up with the registering for some reason. Will be having a word with the site manager I can tell you. Some kind of sick joke.
I only offered you a drink, not to get in your knickers, I'm not that sort of guy. I like to get to know a bird a bit beforehand. So tell me, how many blokes you had then?
Ahhhhh Neil, my man slaps back
Nice to see another straight talking lad in here. Now I'm all for the minorities and all that, yeh, but they have to do as the Romans do, if you know what I mean.
We don't go to their countries, yeh, and like, wear sombreros n stuff like that. No, we would look a right tourist then. I went to Benidorm last year, a drinking thing with the lads yeh, great fun, loads of slappers there. Nearly pulled a few times, but I'm not like that, yeh, I have far too much respect for the ladies to do that, had to turn them down.
But I was treated like a local there, because I know how to act in the right communities. Several times I was mistaken for Spanish and had lots of loud talking at me and gestures by the local bar and restaurant owners themselves. They thought I could understand them. Mates had a right laugh about that one I can tell you. But it's just that I know how to act around them, so they treated me like 'one of them'
Nice to see another straight talking lad in here. Now I'm all for the minorities and all that, yeh, but they have to do as the Romans do, if you know what I mean.
We don't go to their countries, yeh, and like, wear sombreros n stuff like that. No, we would look a right tourist then. I went to Benidorm last year, a drinking thing with the lads yeh, great fun, loads of slappers there. Nearly pulled a few times, but I'm not like that, yeh, I have far too much respect for the ladies to do that, had to turn them down.
But I was treated like a local there, because I know how to act in the right communities. Several times I was mistaken for Spanish and had lots of loud talking at me and gestures by the local bar and restaurant owners themselves. They thought I could understand them. Mates had a right laugh about that one I can tell you. But it's just that I know how to act around them, so they treated me like 'one of them'
No wonder this thread has been taken over by just the lads, none of it is in proper English. I can understand it all of course. But the ladies won't find it so easy. Give them a break eh?
This rhyming stuff is good very good, but it's not going to get you a shag is it. Ladies just don't dig that stuff, they prefer plain talking straight up guys ...... the regular lad, but also someone they can relate to ...... I don't like to blow my own trumpet as you know but the ladies, they like that I can talk about their problems, they feel at ease with me. I haven't been in this business this long and not learnt a thing or two about women, I can tell you. Once they feel at ease, then you can move in for the shag. Ditch this so called 'clever' stuff, yeh? Tell a few jokes - a bit like Fozzy, but better if you know what I mean. The birds will be in here in no time with their tits out and gagging for it.
This rhyming stuff is good very good, but it's not going to get you a shag is it. Ladies just don't dig that stuff, they prefer plain talking straight up guys ...... the regular lad, but also someone they can relate to ...... I don't like to blow my own trumpet as you know but the ladies, they like that I can talk about their problems, they feel at ease with me. I haven't been in this business this long and not learnt a thing or two about women, I can tell you. Once they feel at ease, then you can move in for the shag. Ditch this so called 'clever' stuff, yeh? Tell a few jokes - a bit like Fozzy, but better if you know what I mean. The birds will be in here in no time with their tits out and gagging for it.
Can I have your attention
See you don't have to talk loud to get attention - some of us just have a presence about them.
I registered but for some reason the 'r' in my surname didn't register as well. Now I don't want any jokes about it. I can take them, might even laugh at them, because I'm like that, can laugh at myself - you have to be able to do that in my job (Boom Boom). But it's not correct to take the piss out of poofters, they don't deserve it, they have feelings too you know.
Everyone knows I'm not gay anyway, always got the chicks hanging round me - I know some of them are old slappers, but there's a couple of classy birds that have looked at me a few times too.
I have that 'aura' about me, stating I love classy birds and not the gays - that's why I don't attract gays, not that I would want to anyway, god no, not my scene at all, revolting if you ask me ....... but I wouldn't say that, no, they deserve our respect. So long as they keep it behind closed doors they can do what they like in my opinion.
Ok I just wanted to clarify that with you. We can carry on with the ball now - not that I like balls or anything, if you know what I mean eh, nudge nudge
Might even have a dance with one of the tasty birds here - need a few drinks in me before that though, eh lads?
David BRENT!
See you don't have to talk loud to get attention - some of us just have a presence about them.
I registered but for some reason the 'r' in my surname didn't register as well. Now I don't want any jokes about it. I can take them, might even laugh at them, because I'm like that, can laugh at myself - you have to be able to do that in my job (Boom Boom). But it's not correct to take the piss out of poofters, they don't deserve it, they have feelings too you know.
Everyone knows I'm not gay anyway, always got the chicks hanging round me - I know some of them are old slappers, but there's a couple of classy birds that have looked at me a few times too.
I have that 'aura' about me, stating I love classy birds and not the gays - that's why I don't attract gays, not that I would want to anyway, god no, not my scene at all, revolting if you ask me ....... but I wouldn't say that, no, they deserve our respect. So long as they keep it behind closed doors they can do what they like in my opinion.
Ok I just wanted to clarify that with you. We can carry on with the ball now - not that I like balls or anything, if you know what I mean eh, nudge nudge
Might even have a dance with one of the tasty birds here - need a few drinks in me before that though, eh lads?
David BRENT!
