***Please be aware - we are a couple looking for repeat meets with selected few people and one, maybe two couples - chiefly because we like to play bareback. If that isn't your thing, then that is absolutely fine. We put this here to ensure clarity and for you to be fully informed - Cheers***

Hello you lucky person, for you have stumbled unwittingly across the profile of Resonance, a couple of deviant souls, from the lost land of Pelvic-thrust-upon-Corset.

Mrs Res is a tall-ish, sex-mad fiend endowed with an ample chest-frontage that has many mere mortals agape with wonder. She is a size 18 for those obsessed with numbers, has a gorgeous smile and a very naughty mind. She is also my wife, jolly considerate, shy and not very often on the site. For here be beasties.

Mr Res is a stumbling dunderhead of a man with apeish good looks and an enormous belly that cannot be missed. He is fully continent and coherent, blessed with a dash of charm and wit to lull you into an orgasmic stupour. He is very fond of the larger lady, especially those with aforementioned ample frontages, though finds wit, charm and a sense of humour equally enticing.

Who knows what we are looking for? Tis likely to be a couple or a single lady, one where the lady doth consider a little dabble with one of her own fair kind. We prefer couples about our own age, who have no hang ups about size, beards, the type of vegetables you eat, what colour your curtains are or if you have ever accepted a lift from Denzel Washington.

Single men - UPDATE - Mrs Res is perhaps considering a bit of fun with the right person. Ideally you'll be between 30-60, your size, cock size are irrelevant to an extent but if yours is a good size (7-9 inches) has a good curve upwards, Mrs Res likes a lot. Friendliness, warmth, patience and good humour far more important qualities. Charm, wit and gentleness also desirable qualities.

**Addendum** - Seeing as we value openness and honesty, which it seems is in short measure these days, we are not going to play with any attached single man or woman who is doing so without the full consent of their partner. That should be taken as a given and a no-exception rule. If you cannot be truthful to them, we feel it is equally unlikely that you would extend us that courtesy.

As you can tell by the profile (and apart from the message above) - we don't take ourselves too seriously. A good evening of fun is always preceded and followed with a good laugh with friends for us. With outbreaks of pure filth in between. If that sounds like fun, let us know.

Here's a list of what we don't do:

- Chaffinch insertion

- Goblin pestering

- Clay Pigeon licking

- Fornicating without using vowels

- Jeremy Kyle show participants

- Anyone who knows or cares who Justin Bieber may or may not be

- People who knock on a front door and start a conversation with "have you ever wondered..."

- Leek fetishists (the vegetable, not the place)

- Cheese-dwelling pixies that answer to the name "Colin".

- Those who don't kiss - it's just weird. It's like trying to drive a car without sticking the key in the ignition.

- Anyone who thinks "toboggoning" is a job.

- Anyone who thinks B&Q sell sex toys. (Made that mistake once, never again. You get some odd looks when you try out the Swarvega as lube).

What we do like:-

- Fraternising socially with equally perverse folk and seeing what happens.

- Watching Goths swelter in the summer heat

- Collecting vegetables (only in alphabetical order - we're not weird or anything)

- Dancing to Timmy Mallet's greatest hits.

- Eviscerating Gordon Ramsey with a fish knife.

- Running around the Meerkat enclosure at the zoo, trying to get those swines to switch Car or Home insurance.

- Singing "My Sharona" loudly on the bottom deck of the bus into work, especially when sat next to an old dear who is more into the Prodigy or Aphex Twin.

- Honesty - It's free and value for money.

- Using a fishing catapult to fling voles that want to parachute into the air, so they can chat to passing seagulls. (They don't speak pigeon, despite my best efforts to teach them)

- Fish impersonators (saw a wonderful Sea Bream one once, but my Haddock impression is still hard to beat).

- Sex - when my therapist allows it. - Particularly with couples, ladies and the occasional single chap, with repeat meetings between us if all goes well as we prefer to play bareback as we both love cum. 

If you'd like to know more, just drop us a line. If not, then well done for reading to the end and have a happy time on here.