anybody else watching Elvis 68 comeback gig on tv right now.... omg that man! Im know im in mourning but Bart knows i love Elvis. He looks soooooo hot and sexy and those eyes... nobody else can touch him even now
Ok ill go now....
Suze x
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Suze43
Over 90 days ago
Straight Female, 64
Forum
omg i cant believe it... that Bart was such an enigma... i knew he liked a certain dutch song but i didnt have a clue who sang it or what it was called and i want it to be played at his funeral. Where to start?
Well i was on the pc and i looked up and there is a pile of unmarked cds, so i went thru them all and there i found the track.. he used to sing it to me... its so lovely and i dont care if nobody knows whats it about, its special to me and Bart.
Right now im playing Limp Bizkit cos we used to play it in the car on the way to munches, singing our heads off... im smiling... bart helped me out today and im a bit happier!
Suze xx
Well i was on the pc and i looked up and there is a pile of unmarked cds, so i went thru them all and there i found the track.. he used to sing it to me... its so lovely and i dont care if nobody knows whats it about, its special to me and Bart.
Right now im playing Limp Bizkit cos we used to play it in the car on the way to munches, singing our heads off... im smiling... bart helped me out today and im a bit happier!
Suze xx
Quote by Ms_Whips
having to make the heartbreaking decision to have my stallion put to sleep in the next week or so. i've known him since he was born and had him 18yrs. it's making me cry alot :upset:
whips
This must be so sad for you esp when its an animal youve loved for so long, whenever my dogs have had to be put down, i think they know its about time and they want to go... im sure yr horse feels equally sad to be leaving you too but just know you gave him a wonderful life. As for whats made me cry today, well thats obvious, one word.... BART XX
Suze xx
hi everyone and thank you all.. had the strangest couple of days ever.... endless phone calls, tracing his mom in Holland (he hadnt got her number anywhere in the house so thanks to the www for help). Telling his mom which was truly heartbreaking, we both were crying so hard, we couldnt get our words out. Then getting a surprising phone call from his estranged dad, hardly able to understand him but being able to tell over the phone that he is devastated and prob feeling guilty for not talking to his only son for over 28 yrs.
Crying my eyes out watching Gavin and Stacey, in particular listening to "youve got the love" by Florence and the Machine, cos bart loved that song. Crying in the shower seeing his shower gel... taking his unwashed top out of the wash, laying on the sofa in our bedroom so i can think that hes really around and of course can i smell him on it. Struggling to put the big boxes of decorations back in the cupboards cos im not tall enough and cursing him under my breath.
Got up the this morning and saw a cigarette had been put all the itself on the table... so weird, nobody in the family put it there, i didnt put it there... was as if it was a sign from bart to have a smoke and calm down! Comforts me to think of it that way. Going into a bit of trance tonight, and hearing his voice to clearly in my head saying "hey its ok", that was lovely and yes i am quite spiritual.
Getting a warm feeling having my children looking after me... i feel like im being a crap mom atm but they are being truly wonderful.
Knowing that on Monday, offices will be opening up again and bart will be on his way to undertakers so i can see him.... ive missed seeing his face so much. Friends are trying to talk me out of it but no way, i need to see him, he was taken too quickly to say goodbye.
EVerthing looks bleak right now.... but ... the messages on here are filled with love and feelings for bart and that fills me with hope ... thank you all..
Suze xx
Crying my eyes out watching Gavin and Stacey, in particular listening to "youve got the love" by Florence and the Machine, cos bart loved that song. Crying in the shower seeing his shower gel... taking his unwashed top out of the wash, laying on the sofa in our bedroom so i can think that hes really around and of course can i smell him on it. Struggling to put the big boxes of decorations back in the cupboards cos im not tall enough and cursing him under my breath.
Got up the this morning and saw a cigarette had been put all the itself on the table... so weird, nobody in the family put it there, i didnt put it there... was as if it was a sign from bart to have a smoke and calm down! Comforts me to think of it that way. Going into a bit of trance tonight, and hearing his voice to clearly in my head saying "hey its ok", that was lovely and yes i am quite spiritual.
Getting a warm feeling having my children looking after me... i feel like im being a crap mom atm but they are being truly wonderful.
Knowing that on Monday, offices will be opening up again and bart will be on his way to undertakers so i can see him.... ive missed seeing his face so much. Friends are trying to talk me out of it but no way, i need to see him, he was taken too quickly to say goodbye.
EVerthing looks bleak right now.... but ... the messages on here are filled with love and feelings for bart and that fills me with hope ... thank you all..
Suze xx
Quote by meat2pleaseu
Another totally gobsmacked one here :shock:
I've met you guys at loads of munches and socials (the last one being Kits 50th a few months ago i think) and it was always nice to see you both.
I do remember loads of us squeezing into the Beemer (Betty, i think you called her) after one munch and zipping round the multi story on the way back to the hotel.
I'm totally lost for anything useful to say, if there is such a thing at times like this, but just wanted to send you a big hug :therethere:
This message has just made me smile Meaty, that was years ago and yes she was called Betty, the best car he ever had, she got us to so many munches safely. He loved that car, unfortunately she went for scrap last year.
Suze x
Thanks to all you of you for these wonderful, loving messages. Bart would be totally overwhelmed, he really didnt think anyone liked him or "got" him. I got him, and he will always be in my heart. The house seems empty without him, i miss him making my coffees which he did all day plus a cracker with cheese. I didnt sleep at all last night, just kept going over and over what happened and wondering how the hell am i going to cope? He really was my rock. My friend is here at the moment, cleaning up blood for all over the front door, there were lunatics out fighting last night and i had to call the police ... felt so vulnerable and scared. Bart, i need u here babe!!
Its really helping to talk to you and altho we havent been around on the site for ages, i knew i could count on you. Thanks
Suze xxx
Its really helping to talk to you and altho we havent been around on the site for ages, i knew i could count on you. Thanks
Suze xxx
I dont like it, never have and now i know in the light of what happened today, that i never will. I have had to call the police tonight to break up a disturbance going on next door.. i was so scared, this lad was being beaten up by the corner of our house..i was wanted bart to be here to sort it out and tell me it would be ok.
New Years Eve? U can keep it!
Suze x
New Years Eve? U can keep it!
Suze x
Thanks everyone for your messages, altho reading them makes me cry every time. I dont know what to do .. i dont know how to act... i mean is it wrong to be on here? Ive been walking aimlessly round the house all afternoon and evening, crying, hurting so much its like my heart is breaking. I just feel like i need to talk about him?
It was strange this morning, we had arranged a nye party but due to lack of interest, i cancelled it last night .... took it really personally but as usual Bart cheered me up and said we would celebrate it by going out for a meal and just being together. He even called me back to bed this afternoon and we had a bit of fun in bed. First time for ages! Then we just stared at each other and he told me he really loved me. We have had our fair share of problems and bart was a total flirt... he couldnt help himself and even today ive found texts on his phone from a woman we both know. But i know he loved me and he loved our life together. We were just a normal couple.
Then he got up and took a shower. Later, he was out bringing in the bins after collection and he said he felt breathless and sweaty. He even threw up in the garden. He sat down for a few mins and said he would be ok in a bit... then i heard this awful noise coming from the lounge, i couldnt even look at him, i knew it was bad... my daughter was home from work and i screamed at her to come and see him. I called an ambulance and we did everything we could... i gave him the kiss of life, i begged him to breathe... i told him i loved and needed him so much. The paramedics tried everything, drugs, cpr but they then told me he had gone. Bart, the love of my life, had gone.. just like that... its not fair. The coroner will be in touch on monday but in the meantime hes gone to the hospital and i cant bear to think of him all alone.... i want him here like he always has been.
How do i go on? How do i manage without my rock? He was the love of my life whatever shit life threw at us.
I had to type this, its a message from me to say PLEASE dont take life for granted, i did. Tell your loved ones u love them every day. Life is just too short.
Suze xx
It was strange this morning, we had arranged a nye party but due to lack of interest, i cancelled it last night .... took it really personally but as usual Bart cheered me up and said we would celebrate it by going out for a meal and just being together. He even called me back to bed this afternoon and we had a bit of fun in bed. First time for ages! Then we just stared at each other and he told me he really loved me. We have had our fair share of problems and bart was a total flirt... he couldnt help himself and even today ive found texts on his phone from a woman we both know. But i know he loved me and he loved our life together. We were just a normal couple.
Then he got up and took a shower. Later, he was out bringing in the bins after collection and he said he felt breathless and sweaty. He even threw up in the garden. He sat down for a few mins and said he would be ok in a bit... then i heard this awful noise coming from the lounge, i couldnt even look at him, i knew it was bad... my daughter was home from work and i screamed at her to come and see him. I called an ambulance and we did everything we could... i gave him the kiss of life, i begged him to breathe... i told him i loved and needed him so much. The paramedics tried everything, drugs, cpr but they then told me he had gone. Bart, the love of my life, had gone.. just like that... its not fair. The coroner will be in touch on monday but in the meantime hes gone to the hospital and i cant bear to think of him all alone.... i want him here like he always has been.
How do i go on? How do i manage without my rock? He was the love of my life whatever shit life threw at us.
I had to type this, its a message from me to say PLEASE dont take life for granted, i did. Tell your loved ones u love them every day. Life is just too short.
Suze xx
Ok this is a hard one to write but i just want people to know that my partner of over 4 yrs, passed away very suddenly this afternoon. His user name on here was Bartdutch, we went to many socials and munches together. I hope some of you do know him, he was the love of my life and im just in total shock. I dont know what to do...
Suze xx
Suze xx
I always drink the strong stuff in the morning but go onto Decaff in the afternoon - caffeine doesnt really suit me and does disrupt my sleep a lot! However, when i come home from work at about i sometimes have a voddy and coke and wondered why i couldnt sleep! Duh!! Silly moo - caffeine again!
My daughter is mad about coke and drinks lots of the stuff but just this week she has gone onto Cloudy Lemonade (thank god) and has been feeling really tired and sleepy all the time. Only dawned on her last night that its probably the caffeine in the coke!
Suze xx
My daughter is mad about coke and drinks lots of the stuff but just this week she has gone onto Cloudy Lemonade (thank god) and has been feeling really tired and sleepy all the time. Only dawned on her last night that its probably the caffeine in the coke!
Suze xx
omg yes the automatic washer - remember well my mum having a "wash day" and standing over the twin tub all day... also remember my aunt having to use the mangle to get the water out of her washing!!
The shower - all us kids used to share a bath, we even used to get into mums bath water cos as she put it "its a lovely bath and not very dirty". Makes me smile now.
Suze xx
The shower - all us kids used to share a bath, we even used to get into mums bath water cos as she put it "its a lovely bath and not very dirty". Makes me smile now.
Suze xx
Ive stayed at home with my children for over 21 years and i like it that way... decided to do this after going to my folks one year and having the worst row ever!! Said never again, no way, and its not even discussed nowadays... we all stay home and chill out and we love it!!
Besides my sister would hate it if i turned up, her nose would so be pushed out!!
Bitter, me?? never lol lol
Suze xx
Besides my sister would hate it if i turned up, her nose would so be pushed out!!
Bitter, me?? never lol lol
Suze xx
For the last few days ive been reminiscing... and realising how when we are younger we kinda think we are invincible.
Twenty eight years ago i went to see "Joy Division" at the Winter Gardens in Malvern and they were absolutely amazing. This was in the April, in the May the lead singer, Ian Curtis, committed suicide. At the time i was heavily involved with a local band,my boyfriend came into Boots (where i was on my final day of working) and said that Ian had killed himself. We all went out that night and sat around, talking, smoking, drinking and generally grieving.
Ive just watched the Joy Division documentary DVD, watched "Control" and im now playing "Unknown Pleasures" and feeling really melancholy. If he was alive today, he would be just a bit older than I am and god know what would have happened to him..
Just wish he would have thought that tomorrow was another day and to kill himself wasnt the way out.
Dont know what the point is of this thread to be honest, i just wanted to share... was anyone else a fan??
Suze xxx
Twenty eight years ago i went to see "Joy Division" at the Winter Gardens in Malvern and they were absolutely amazing. This was in the April, in the May the lead singer, Ian Curtis, committed suicide. At the time i was heavily involved with a local band,my boyfriend came into Boots (where i was on my final day of working) and said that Ian had killed himself. We all went out that night and sat around, talking, smoking, drinking and generally grieving.
Ive just watched the Joy Division documentary DVD, watched "Control" and im now playing "Unknown Pleasures" and feeling really melancholy. If he was alive today, he would be just a bit older than I am and god know what would have happened to him..
Just wish he would have thought that tomorrow was another day and to kill himself wasnt the way out.
Dont know what the point is of this thread to be honest, i just wanted to share... was anyone else a fan??
Suze xxx
We were on holiday in Tenby when Elvis died. We walked back into the caravan after an evening out and my uncle just said "Elvis is dead". We were gobsmacked.
It was my daughters 10th birthday when Diana died, she came into our bedroom in the morning and told me my mum was on the phone. All my mum could tell me was that Di had died and i just kept thinking "oh no, of all the days it has to be Helens birthday". Went to the American Adventure and the atmosphere there was sooo strange. There was a really bad thunderstorm and all the rides had to be stopped, we were given free tickets to go back again the following week. I cried the whole day of her funeral tho, it was so upsetting.
Twin Towers - had just picked up youngest son from nursery and put the tv on and there it was... so devastating and really unbelievable.
Dunblane - i cant remember what i was doing but i do remember my little girl had just started school and kept thinking how i would feel if it had been her... another awful event.
Suze xxx
It was my daughters 10th birthday when Diana died, she came into our bedroom in the morning and told me my mum was on the phone. All my mum could tell me was that Di had died and i just kept thinking "oh no, of all the days it has to be Helens birthday". Went to the American Adventure and the atmosphere there was sooo strange. There was a really bad thunderstorm and all the rides had to be stopped, we were given free tickets to go back again the following week. I cried the whole day of her funeral tho, it was so upsetting.
Twin Towers - had just picked up youngest son from nursery and put the tv on and there it was... so devastating and really unbelievable.
Dunblane - i cant remember what i was doing but i do remember my little girl had just started school and kept thinking how i would feel if it had been her... another awful event.
Suze xxx
Quote by sexy_Toni62
HIya Suze,I don't know you nor do you know me but since its my birthday and there isn't anyone I know in the world with same birthday, I just could not pass you by xxxxxxxxx so again HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU , WONDERFUL LIBRAN xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sexi-T xxxxxxxxxxxxx
Aww thanks Toni, and i hope u had a wonderful birthday too!!!
Suze xxxx
