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mancbloke
Over 90 days ago
Straight Male, 56
Bisexual Female, 57

Forum

Quote by flapjackboy

It can't be that hard to miss, surely.


Hehehe its all that camming, makes you go blind!
Quote by zOrg
hey there people. i'm Francesco aka zOrg.
i'm 21, half English/Italian and i'm a Law student (who's stressed with revision lol)
just signed up to this site looks pretty cool.
just thought it would be nice to introduce myself to you guys.
well hope to chat to you guys soon. lol

:welcome: Have fun.
Quote by leprechaun
91 and rising


I refuse to play!
I heard an interesting couple of things about that frog.
The guy who created it has made 10 million from it, apparently!
Guess the joke is on us
And it is the most complained about ad on UK tv
Quote by marmalaid
Yes it is important to me, but then I hold me to my standards and let them keep to their own. I'm not complaining.
Tolerance should be the watchword here, now fuck off and be tolerant ya cant!!!

Hmm there is tolerance and tolerance. I'm only talking about emails really, not forum posts or chatting on yahell and the like or even emails between people you know. I'm talking about first contact mails. Bottom line is .. they anoy me!
Quote by Alexandra
We should also take into consideration that some of our best loved members are dyslexic.

No problem with dyslexia. I fully understand the problems associated with it.
Its not the odd slip I'm talking about it's the general lack of .....well everything!
lol
Ok This is a general moan about the lack of punctuation, spelling and grammar in emails.
It seems to be symptomatic of the txt generation to shorten, abbreviate or substitute letters or words with numbers or to write a whole mail without capital letters, full stops paragraphs or even a cursory brush with a spellchecker.
Maybe I’m just old but if I’m sending an email to someone I intend to impress, which after all is what you want to do when contacting people on this site, I want it to convey at least a modicum of intelligence.
M.b. (Who is waiting for this post to be ripped apart!)
Quote by dambuster
Going on from what i read in Oni thread i thought that i would post these examples of when it goes wrong online.
(Mods, If this has been posted before please feel free to delete the thread)
lol enjoy
CYBERSEX GONE WRONG (this is the best one)
sweet17: Hi
bloodninja: hello
bloodninja: who is this?
sweet17: just a someone?
bloodninja: A someone I know?
sweet17: nope
bloodninja: Then why the hell are you bothering me?
sweet17: well sorrrrrry
sweet17: I just wanted to chat with you
bloodninja: why?
sweet17: nevermind your an jerk
bloodninja: Hey wait a minute
sweet17: yes?
bloodninja: look I'm sorry. I'm just a little paranoid
sweet17: paranoid?
bloodninja: yes
sweet17: of what?
sweet17: me?
bloodninja: No. I'm in hiding.
sweet17: LOL
bloodninja: Don't fucking laugh at me!
bloodninja: This shit is serious!
sweet17: What are you hiding from?
bloodninja: The cops.
sweet17: gimme a fucking break
bloodninja: I'm serious.
sweet17: I don't get it
bloodninja: The cops are after me.
sweet17: For what?
bloodninja: I'm wanted in three states
sweet17: For???
bloodninja: It's kindof embarrasing.
bloodninja: I had sex with a turkey.
bloodninja: Hello?
sweet17: You are fucking sick.
bloodninja: Send me your picture.
sweet17: why?
bloodninja: so I know you aren't one of them.
sweet17: One of what?
bloodninja: The cops.
sweet17: I'm not a cop i told you
bloodninja: Then send me your picture.
sweet17: hold on
bloodninja: Hurry up.
bloodninja: Are you there?
bloodninja: fuck you, cop!
sweet17: Hey sorry
sweet17: I had to do something for my mom.
bloodninja: I thought you were trying to find a picture to send to me.
bloodninja: When really you were notifying the authorities.
bloodninja: Weren't you!?
sweet17: thats not it
bloodninja: Then what?
sweet17: I don't want to send you the picture cause I'm not pretty
bloodninja: Most cops aren't
sweet17: IM NOT A FUCKING COP YOU DICKSHIT!
bloodninja: Then send me the picture.
sweet17: fine. What's your e-mail?
bloodninja: Just send it through here.
sweet17: alright *PIC*
sweet17: Did you get it?
bloodninja: Hold on. I'm looking.
sweet17: That was me back in may
sweet17: I've lost weight since then.
bloodninja: I hope so
sweet17: what?!?
sweet17: that hurt my feelings.
bloodninja: Did it?
sweet17: Yes. I'm not that much smaller than that now.
bloodninja: Will it make you feel better if I send you my picture?
sweet17: yes
bloodninja: Alright let me find it.
sweet17: kks
bloodninja: Okay here it is. *PIC*
sweet17: this isn't you.
bloodninja: I'll be damned if it ain't!
sweet17: You don't look like that.
bloodninja: How the hell do you know?
sweet17: cause your profile has another picture.
bloodninja: The profile pic is a fake.
bloodninja: I use it to hide from the cops.
sweet17: You look like the Farm Fresh guy lol
bloodninja: Well, you look like you ATE the Farm Fresh guy....
bloodninja: Not to mention all the groceries.
sweet17: Go fuck yourself
bloodninja: I was going to until I saw that picture
bloodninja: Now my unit won't get hard for a week.
sweet17: I shouldn't have sent you that picture.
sweet17: You've done nothing but slam me.
sweet17: you hurt me.
bloodninja: And calling me the Farm Fresh guy doesn't hurt me?
sweet17: I thought you were bullcrapping me!
bloodninja: Why would I do that?
sweet17: I can't believe that cops are after you
bloodninja: I can't believe Santa lets you sit on his lap..
sweet17: FUCK YOU!!!
bloodninja: You'd break both of his legs.
sweet17: You're a fucking wanker!
sweet17: I've been teased my whole life because of my weight
sweet17: and you make fun of me when you don't even know me
bloodninja: Ok. I'm sorry.
sweet17: No you aren't
bloodninja: You're right. I'm not.
bloodninja: HAARRRRR!
sweet17: I'm done with you
bloodninja: Aww. I'm sorry.
sweet17: I'm putting you on ignore
bloodninja: Wait a sec
bloodninja: We got off on the wrong foot.
bloodninja: Wanna start over?
sweet17: No
bloodninja: I'll eat your kitty
sweet17: You'll what?
bloodninja: You heard me.
bloodninja: I said I'd eat your kitty.
sweet17: I thought you said you couldn't get it hard after seeing my picture
bloodninja: Do I need a hard-on to eat your kitty?
sweet17: I'd like to know that the man eating me out is excited yes
bloodninja: Well I'm not like most men.
bloodninja: I get excited in different ways.
sweet17: Like what?
bloodninja: Do you really wanna know?
sweet17: I don't know
bloodninja: You have to tell me yes or no.
sweet17: I'm afraid to
bloodninja: Why?
sweet17: cause
bloodninja: cause why?
sweet17: well lets see
sweet17: you say you have sex with turkeys. You call me fat. then you wanna eat me out
sweet17: doesn't that seem strange to you?
bloodninja: Nope
sweet17: well its strange to me
bloodninja: Fine. I won't do it if you don't want me to
sweet17: I didn't say that
bloodninja: So is that a yes?
sweet17: I guess so.
bloodninja: Ok. I need your help getting excited though.
bloodninja: Are you willing?
sweet17: What do you need me to do?
bloodninja: I need you talk like a pirate.
sweet17: ???
bloodninja: When I start to go limp... you say "HARRRR!!!"
bloodninja: ok?
bloodninja: Hello?
sweet17: You can't be serious
bloodninja: Oh yes I am!
bloodninja: It's my fantasy.
sweet17: this is retarded
bloodninja: Do you want it or not?
sweet17: Yes I want it.
bloodninja: Then you'll do it for me?
sweet17: sure
bloodninja: Ok. Here we go.
bloodninja: I gently remove your panties and being to massage your thighs.
bloodninja: You get really juicy thinking about my tounge brushing up against them
bloodninja: I softly begin to tounge your wet kitty.
bloodninja: I run my tounge up and down your smooth cunt.
sweet17: mmmm yeah
bloodninja: uh oh ...going limp.
sweet17: Har
bloodninja: You gotta do better than that!
bloodninja: Your picture was really bad.
sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRR
bloodninja: Ahhhh. Much better. I feel your kitty get more moist with every stroke.
bloodninja: I softly suck on your clit bringing it in and out of my mouth.
bloodninja: Your juices run down my chin as your scent makes its way to my nose.
bloodninja: I begin to feel empowered by your femininity.
sweet17: mmmmmm you are good
bloodninja: I feel your thighs tighten as I fuck harder
bloodninja: going limp
sweet17: HARRRRRRR
bloodninja: Mmmm I grab your swelling buttocks in my hands.
bloodninja: You begin to sway back and forth.
bloodninja: going limp
sweet17: this is stupid
bloodninja: ...still limp
bloodninja: Do it!
sweet17: HARRRRRRRRRRRRR
bloodninja: I turn you around to lick your asshole.
bloodninja: I pry apart that battleship you call your ass.
bloodninja: I see poo nuggets hanging from the hair around your ass.
sweet17: WTF?!?!?
bloodninja: They stink really bad.
sweet17: OMG STOP!!!
bloodninja: I start to get fed up with your ugly ass
bloodninja: I tear off your wooden peg leg.
bloodninja: I ram it up your ass.
sweet17: YOURE A FUCKING PYSCHO!!
bloodninja: Then I pour hot carmel over your head.
bloodninja: And turn you into a fucking candy apple...
bloodninja: I kick you in the face!
sweet17: FUCK YOU DICKHEAD!!
bloodninja: The celluloid from your cheeks hits the side of the cabin...
bloodninja: Your parrot flys away.
bloodninja: ...going limp again.
bloodninja: Hello?
bloodninja: Say it!
bloodninja: HAARRRRRR!!!!!

You just knew some dopey twat would quote it, didn'tya ???
......sings .... it had to be you .........
and me :giggle:
C xxx
Are we playing the quote in quote in quote game now? :lol:
Do you think we should?
Calista xx
Maybe we should put it to the vote?
Nah too much effort .. we should just start it off and see what happens ... you know like when you stand staring into space .... it's inevitable (crap the wine has affected my spelling that took me 4 attempts) that someone will join in ;)
C xx Or like, when there's a queue, people just join it?
exactly ... how long do you think it'll take? we can always blame DB .. he started this ....
C xx
Definitely blame DB, he's not watching is he :twisted:
Oooooooooo he's here, and he's brought the Sarge with him - look innocent innocent :whistling: :whistling: :whistling: :whistling:
You two - look innocent??? confused :? :? :lol2: :lol2: :lol2: :lol2:
Damn .. think we've been rumbled Freckledbird honey .......
C xx
Think you may be right. I'm off to bed anyway now, gone all dizzy I have :shock:
Night hon xx
I'm blaming the wine for my dizziness but perhaps this is a better excuse. Can't go to bed yet I've made Morb go to Asda for some Lemon Meringue ice Cream for me ... if I didn't know better I'd swear I was pregnant ;) Would explain the nausea tiredness and sickness too :shock: :shock: :shock: :shock:
C xx
yay i joined in this is messing my eyes up!!!!!!!!!!!
Welcome to the squeeze thread liitle 'un.
Come and sit here with me.
Don't worry about your eyes getting messy, we can do it all by feel. :twisted: :twisted:
now that is a offer i carnt refuse<<<<<<<<runs up and takes a seat>>>>>>>>>>> boink
That's right, you just jump up on uncle dammies knee. I might need to hold you tightly, so you don't fall off wink
erm..................................Can I play too? smile
Quote by Sexysteph
Perhaps he holds the Elixir of youth wink lol

Hehehe perhaps he has alzheimer's and he's really 97 :evil2:
Quote by waynesworld
Whats the score at Cupids are singlies allowed n and what are the prices, is it a good nite for everyone? been to partner ok but not much action talk me through a normal nite thanks


Best reading the reviews mate..
I have only been as part of a couple and quite frankly
some of the single guys start to anoy me after a while.
M.b.

Cupids Reviews
Quote by bluexxx
Sarah, Wednesday is tranny night.... lol :lol: :lol: :lol: ...... but maybe one day we'll do something unpredictable and have it on a different day <shock horror> :lol:
Gem and Hornyred, you're on the list... Mancbloke, you seem sane so I can't see why not, you're on the list too :lol: :lol: :lol:

Ta chuck smile Dunno about sane tho ..........
Quote by jack_daniels72
Will there be canapes ?

And maybe those little sausages on sticks with cheese n pineapple?
Quote by sexycaroline
Hello all, New to this life but hopefully will have lots of fun.
Dave biggrin

Welcome and enjoy the view
Pretty new here myself. So hope i'm not stepping on toes
with the first welcome smile
M.b.
We i for on know sods law exists!
If I'm gigging out doors it'll bloody rain.
Gigging indoors, something will blow up!
Quote by manofmuchfun
oooo we got a lovely pm too !
"shall we meet an I give ya a real good time"
now honest we was gonna accomodate him..........as long as he could prove 18 !.....his brains woulda been blown.....but our point was his attitude was bragging unless he could prove different....his chance was there
anyway he didnt like 40 yr old saggy tits ............he'll learn !
Alan & Tina !

LOL He pm'd me too!
Quote by kh
so do you wanna meet up with me so i can give you a great time then?

A great time? well i've seen shreck and the Thunderbirds film was sh!te so I guess I'll say no.
Quote by kh
i wanna meet horny women so i can have there pussy inside my mouth and also have my cum inside there tight pussys and i love making women cum too lol

Heheh ya can't fail. Seems we have a lot to learn from you youngens.
Quote by Nomad_Soul
Randy-andy .......... what the hell do you expect mate??
You've been a member for 18 months and made 26 posts ffs!!!!!!!!
You need to get yourself known to other members, attend munches, parties, social gatherings ,and any other event that you can get too.
Although to be honest, at the moment, nobody knows you and your chances of being invited to anything are very remote. Do yourself a favour and post a few replies in the forums, have a look in the chatroom if you get chance. What I am REALLY saying is get yourself known to others.
Sexalicious, you only joined yesterday. Give it time mate. But the above advice still applies.

Well said! It all takes time.
If ya looking for instant gratification.... ya in the wrong place!
Quote by maxnsue
we went to Cupids on Saturday night and had a really good time, we had fun with 2 couples and some single guys. Everyone was friendly and there seemed to be a decent variety of single blokes there.

When we went on Tuesday it was my first time. I was expecting single guys to be there but it was still a bit of a shock when I settled down in quiet corner with my lady friend and we were suddenly surrounded by 6-7 guys one of whom had been following us around like a lap dog, a little disconcerting to say the least. Prob just me tho lol
That said none of the guys were pushy and all were pleasant and friendly and I totally enjoyed myself. Ended up with just the one couple near the end of the night.
Mental note to myself.... 'Don't be so f*&kin shy'!!!
Looking forward to next time
lol
He sounds like ya typical shovanist fucknugget
(sorry guys) tho I'm sure none of the guys on here
would dream of a reaction like that.
Not sure what the reply would be, as a swift kick in
the teeth often offends.
Quote by bell412
Just istening to Daft Punk's new album. It is absolutely brilliant!!!!!!!!!
Also, The Killers "Hot Fuss", Kasabian (self titled), Kaiser Chiefs "Employment", New Order "Waiting for the Sirens' call"
There is some brilliant music around at the minute.
What is your favourite album or song at the minute????????????????????????????

Yeah there is some good stuff out there at the moment.
Listening to Kasabians album right now.. The first album in about six years that I can honestly say I like every track on.
Got to get New Orders new one tho!!
Well just have to say......... That was a blast!
I think I'll be going again lol
Thanks Debz for making my first
time there something to remember.
steve we are going biggrin was ok last tues :D
Us too!
Tho my first time my partner has been before
so looking forward to a good time.
See you there!
I can also say that this site does work!
All depends on your attitude,
all good things come to those who wait!!
Quote by SXBOY
postman on a horse

I'm sure I've seen a dvd like that...
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.
.
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