Hi there everyone.
Most of you will know me as Marcuso from the chat room.
I'm getting used to seeing lots of posts on here from single guys who are moaning that they don't get a meet.
Without sounding big-headed or conceited, I'd like to offer them a bit of advice on how to improve their chances of becoming accepted onto the swinging scene.
I'm not saying this is the perfect or even the only way to become accepted, but I have found that it works for me.
I am a single male who is now established & been accepted by couples and singles. Here's the best advice I can give to single males trying to get established in the swinging scene!
1. Always be open & honest about what you are looking for. No-one likes making the effort to meet someone only to find out that they are looking for different things.
2. Never say you are gonna meet someone & then not turn up. People hate timewasters.
3. Meet people just for socials if that is all they are offering. If they are impressed with you then the sex will come naturally. As I said, this community isn't just about sex, it's about people just meeting up as friends too & having a relaxed meet with no pressure.
4. Be willing to go out of your way to meet people. Don't forget - you are the one who is wanting to meet people who are already established on the swinging scene & therefore, they will not go out of their way to meet you as they already have a circle of friends who they know are genuine & easy going.
5. And probably most important DON'T EVER SEEM DESPERATE TO MEET PEOPLE. Don't push someone to meet & if someone says no then that's what they mean. A lot of people get put off by someone being overkeen & see it as a kind of stalking.
6. Have a look in the message boards & see what people have put into those. This will give you some sort of idea as to the kind of ad to post. And always post in every board that applies to you as this will give you more chance. (Don't forget to keep checking them regularly too as a lot of people forget to check & miss out)
7. Try going to one of the various clubs that are available all over the country or go to an open party invitation or munch thats been posted. This will show people that you are genuine.
8. When filling in a section on your ad to what your looking for the more information you give about your self the more your profile will stand out more people will read it and take you more seriously as you have taken more time & effort over what your looking for .
Not a lot else that I can add really apart from BE PATIENT If you keep trying and are patient then it will happen eventually. Don't be put off by a few negative replies. I must have had hundreds of negative replies before I got my first meet. But once I got my first meet I have found it a lot easier to meet people.
As I said, I'm not trying to come over as conceited or big-headed, but I have found that using my own advice I have made many new friends and have been to some really good parties and social meets.
I really hope this has helped.
Marcuso
PS.....Below are two links to different areas of the site. They give perspectives from a womans point of view and also from one of the mens. These are also worth reading!!!
http://www.swingingheaven.co.u...
http://www.swingingheaven.co.u...
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CAN I OFFER THE SINGLE GUYS A BIT OF ADVICE?
Sex God
Jolly good stuff.... hope they listen! 
Sex God
A round of applause
Well said
Well said
Sex God
i absolutly agree with everyone else.... a very well written piece...
i would have suggested putting it up as a sticky somewhere on the site.....
but do you think they would actually bother to read it and stop the rants???
sean xxxx
i would have suggested putting it up as a sticky somewhere on the site.....
but do you think they would actually bother to read it and stop the rants???
sean xxxx
Mod
Nothing to argue with there Marcuso - spot on 
!
Mal
!Mal
Sex God
in a word sean, probably not! well that was 2 words i know but hey! i thought no was a touch blunt! ;-)
nice one marcuso mate. bang on!
neil x x x ;-)
nice one marcuso mate. bang on!
neil x x x ;-)
listen ot this Guy, he is talking sence
i anit gonna say i'm as experieend as the almight Marcuso. but i nkow the whats and what nots to do on chatting in the room..
please from a personaly view, going to the munches and parties are a BIG yes.
ive only been to a few, but since , ppl now realise i'm nore than just a nickname behind a screen and i have got a lot of respect. and that respect goes both ways.
the things that i think are a go go
truth --- Being who u say ya are
joining in with the banter in the main room, (and i dont mean saying the same one line every five mins)
talking to the Males as well as the Fems
NO NO's
asking every "could be" fem to PVT
PVTing with out asking
nicknames like "well Hung", or "tit Lover",
abusive chat
That was my 2 cents worth, hope its not bored ya too much, and i apolyigise for the grammer and spelling mistakes
from the One and only Brummie Blusher
JGLEbbon
i anit gonna say i'm as experieend as the almight Marcuso. but i nkow the whats and what nots to do on chatting in the room..
please from a personaly view, going to the munches and parties are a BIG yes.
ive only been to a few, but since , ppl now realise i'm nore than just a nickname behind a screen and i have got a lot of respect. and that respect goes both ways.
the things that i think are a go go
truth --- Being who u say ya are
joining in with the banter in the main room, (and i dont mean saying the same one line every five mins)
talking to the Males as well as the Fems
NO NO's
asking every "could be" fem to PVT
PVTing with out asking
nicknames like "well Hung", or "tit Lover",
abusive chat
That was my 2 cents worth, hope its not bored ya too much, and i apolyigise for the grammer and spelling mistakes
from the One and only Brummie Blusher
JGLEbbon
Sexpert
very well said marcuso
one more thing to add
cock pics are not needed
one more thing to add
cock pics are not needed
Orgasminator
Well Marcuso, You described it, i read it and your spot on. Good advice mate.
:evil: :evil: 
Sex God
Quote by vodka_babe22uk
well said marcuso but i think you might need to re do it in braile too
voddy xxxx
Yeah, I don't think the guy who wants his cock sucked and balls milked TODAY has seen your post yet ...
Sex God
Well ,welll.. someone from blackburn who's shy? I think not!!!
Single guys
this is good advice,i know from experience.
When i first started on the dogging scene i was nervous,got myslef lost,and got cold feet once (sorry Bluexx).
however since then i have become more experienced and met a few couples on here,i am always courtious and have met couples for drinks only,where nothing else has short treat everyone with respect and if things happen be patient
Brian
this is good advice,i know from experience.
When i first started on the dogging scene i was nervous,got myslef lost,and got cold feet once (sorry Bluexx).
however since then i have become more experienced and met a few couples on here,i am always courtious and have met couples for drinks only,where nothing else has short treat everyone with respect and if things happen be patient
Brian
makes them sound desperate helen. it must be really off putting for the girls here as some of the posts make me laugh or cringe or they honestly think why they havent got a reply and wonder why?
patience and good manners cost nothing.
yes you do have to wait and build before you start getting anyhwere here but,good
things come to those that wait.
i like the forum also because of the humour etc and, info.. its nice to have freinds and
chat about things in common.
id love to meet most people here for a drink and become known to them, if anything nice happens then to me that would be a massive plus!
after all its why im here, but if it doesnt its not the end of the world. id still
like to keep in touch with not enemies.
patience and good manners cost nothing.
yes you do have to wait and build before you start getting anyhwere here but,good
things come to those that wait.
i like the forum also because of the humour etc and, info.. its nice to have freinds and
chat about things in common.
id love to meet most people here for a drink and become known to them, if anything nice happens then to me that would be a massive plus!
after all its why im here, but if it doesnt its not the end of the world. id still
like to keep in touch with not enemies.
Quote by JudyTV
really strange,,,,,,,just got a message saying someone had replied and it came up as "does not exist".......any ideas why??
Thats because someone has posted a reply and then deleted it almost immediately. It will then come up as 'does not exist'
PHEW!!!!!....thanks for clearing that up for me Judy....I thought I was going round the twist.......then again, that might not be far wrong...................lol
Quote by DreamerHelen
Nice one Marcuso.......you're spot on......
I hate it when single guys think they can come on here and get a date with a single line of 'fancy a shag'......
Helen........I need a date...........Fancy a shag??...........................lol
Warming the Bed
Stumbled across Roger' insights, late yesterday afternoon. As a new, single male, found it to be a great read and concur with fabio, that YES, it should be posted as a sticky somewhere on here, probably right under the eyelids of all the "new" single male members!
Please take 5mins to read this, mull it over and don't be put off.
Erm, kinda just wanted to bring this back to the top of the pile!
Take care
Please take 5mins to read this, mull it over and don't be put off.
Erm, kinda just wanted to bring this back to the top of the pile!
Take care
Thank you for pointing me in this direction Marcuso, the advice sounds absolutely rock solid, as do Heathers views on single male replies which show the severe competition when replying to an ad, get it wrong and you've lost them forever a little thought and understanding of an advertisers needs are essential when posting a reply, and Roger who reminds us that the key objective should be to have fun, despite the unanswered posts (and if the figures are correct its hardly surprising that most posts are not replied to) and the rejection after rejection.
All three articles (and there are probably more out there) should be compulsive reading for everyone joining Swinging Heaven.
All three articles (and there are probably more out there) should be compulsive reading for everyone joining Swinging Heaven.
Orgasminator
Well as a single guy new on here it is difficult obviously, as an outsider there is a lot of caution from other users when you put up a thread or answer an add, this i totally expect and if i answer an add and get no reply i just leave it as those i have replied to and had no reply from can testify too i hope.
There are no right ways to do it as far as i can tell at the minute, but there are a hell of alot of wrong ways, it is like stepping through a mine field, some adds want a face pic, some want a cock shot and some want you to tell them how you would sexually humiliate them. Personally i would rather say "hi im midlandsman1970 take a look at my add and if you like what you see then please get in touch", nothing more. But, at the end of the day common sense is a good guide.
I want to shout HEY IM HERE but im not gonna, my kids love me and thats really enough for me day to day. Eventually people on this site will get to know me if they can tolerate me that long and will eventually find out that im not all that bad.
Id like to thank Steve for letting me come to the Banquet next March, i must have made an impression there as i haven't been on the site a week yet and im really looking forward to it, not that i expect an instant shag at the end of the munch but it is a chance for me to meet you guys n gals and vice versa.
Everyone wants to have as much fun as the "veterans" of this site but i guess the patient ones who stick about and aren't pushy will have the most fun at the end of the day.
I have been single for 3 years since my split and i miss this. I have female friends who dearly love and care for me but they aren't.......... compatable shall we say, and im not going to ruin a bloody good friendship by sleeping with a friend for the hell of it!!!
I only got a computer a short while ago and have found this site fantastic ever since. Ive been involved in things sparsley since the split but generally by accident. Lets just say when we were married OUR friends were the ex wifes and not mine after and i was left out in the cold.
It would be nice for me to meet a single lady on this site and have a long term thing not just a one night stand, but what will be will be and ive lived with that approach to life for 3 years now.
If i have upset anyone on this site so far then i genuinely apologise for it and hope that when you do get to know me you will realise that it was a mistake and never intended.
Im a friendly and open/honest kind of person and i don't want to push myself on anyone on this site, and if you think thats what im doing then please tell me and i don't care if you name and shame me in the forum. But if you can spare a minute get to know me then you will find out that im a really nice guy, im a really good dad and im a really nice friend.
Matt.
There are no right ways to do it as far as i can tell at the minute, but there are a hell of alot of wrong ways, it is like stepping through a mine field, some adds want a face pic, some want a cock shot and some want you to tell them how you would sexually humiliate them. Personally i would rather say "hi im midlandsman1970 take a look at my add and if you like what you see then please get in touch", nothing more. But, at the end of the day common sense is a good guide.
I want to shout HEY IM HERE but im not gonna, my kids love me and thats really enough for me day to day. Eventually people on this site will get to know me if they can tolerate me that long and will eventually find out that im not all that bad.
Id like to thank Steve for letting me come to the Banquet next March, i must have made an impression there as i haven't been on the site a week yet and im really looking forward to it, not that i expect an instant shag at the end of the munch but it is a chance for me to meet you guys n gals and vice versa.
Everyone wants to have as much fun as the "veterans" of this site but i guess the patient ones who stick about and aren't pushy will have the most fun at the end of the day.
I have been single for 3 years since my split and i miss this. I have female friends who dearly love and care for me but they aren't.......... compatable shall we say, and im not going to ruin a bloody good friendship by sleeping with a friend for the hell of it!!!
I only got a computer a short while ago and have found this site fantastic ever since. Ive been involved in things sparsley since the split but generally by accident. Lets just say when we were married OUR friends were the ex wifes and not mine after and i was left out in the cold.
It would be nice for me to meet a single lady on this site and have a long term thing not just a one night stand, but what will be will be and ive lived with that approach to life for 3 years now.
If i have upset anyone on this site so far then i genuinely apologise for it and hope that when you do get to know me you will realise that it was a mistake and never intended.
Im a friendly and open/honest kind of person and i don't want to push myself on anyone on this site, and if you think thats what im doing then please tell me and i don't care if you name and shame me in the forum. But if you can spare a minute get to know me then you will find out that im a really nice guy, im a really good dad and im a really nice friend.
Matt.
