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Catholic prayer - Abfab Meeting

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I had a recent conversation with God:
ME: God!? God, you there?
:
:
ME: God?
GOD: Hm who's there? Ah... it's you again
ME: Yes, Lord, I wanted to ask you something
GOD: Not again! Listen, I have given you a good life.
ME: Yes, Lord, you certainly have.
GOD: I gave you loving parents, many close friends, and a rewarding profession.
ME: Yes you did, Lord, and I'm really grateful for the big ahem... cock! too.
GOD: Don't mention it. So what is it now?.
ME: Well it's about women.
GOD: Women?
Me: Yes, women
GOD: Oh dear...
Me: Well, not all women but swinging women.
GOD: Oh... I see... go on.
Me: I got into swinging big time and I'm loving it but now I decided to try a swinging club.
GOD: You know you shouldn't really be telling me this?
Me: Sorry but just hear me out.
GOD: Go on then
Me: Well, it's a bit scary going to a swinging club on your own you see? So I was wondering if you wouldn't mind steering a good swinging woman or couple my way to hold my cock... I mean my hand and show me the ropes as it were? NOT that I'm into ropes you understand!
GOD: Yeah, yeah, yeah you lot always say that!
Me: So what about it?
GOD: Look I can hardly do that can I? I'm GOD for goodness sake and Catholic to boot!
Me: Yeah well, I thought... you know. I even did a couple of Hail Mary's and Lord's Prayers this morning.
GOD: Yeah I heard that... sounded more like grovelling than praying.
Me: Oh - sorry.
GOD: Look why don't you ask at the swingers site you perv about and maybe someone will take pity on you and meet you at the club eh?
Me: Hmmmmm that sounds like a great idea. Thank you God!
GOD: Don't mention it.
Me: Oh and can you do something about my expanding belly? Been trying to get rid of it and barely made a difference.
GOD: Your swinging mates will see your inner beauty.
ME: Uh huh. How abouy the creaking knees?
GOD: Cod liver oil will sort that one out.
ME: Thank you Lord thy will be done..!
GOD: Don't get all biblical on me.
Soooo here I am... I will be going to AbFabs this Friday October 21st. Would anyone like to meet up for a chat and a few laughs and who knows what else?
If anyone is going, please say hello, don't let me stand there like a lemon ;-)
AWOL
Love it !!!
Hope you get someone to take you to / keep you company at the club, sounds like you have a good sense of humour.
John & Shel