Ive been a member of this forum for quite a while now, and i must admit, watched and read, more than contributed.
So why are you here? and what do you expect and want?
Orgasminator
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A question for single guys on the forum,
Orgasminator
Some how i think this will drop like a stone in water :twisted:
Wilki, The first thing you have to understand is that not all single guys (or married guys like me) will be the same. I suppose that to a fit 20-30 year old bloke, it would seem a bit strange to use a web site like this, especially if you think that the only reason people are here is to meet shagging partners.
Just as a for instance, I myself am married.
I come on here for the friendly (and sometimes not-so-friendly, chat.
I also like to meet up for a beer or two with people I know from here and have a laugh.
What I DON'T like, is the idea of wandering off into town on my own where the chances are I'll get a glass shoved in my face by a couple of the local hooligans.
There will be many reasons for blokes coming to these boards, most different to mine.
Just as a for instance, I myself am married.
I come on here for the friendly (and sometimes not-so-friendly, chat.
I also like to meet up for a beer or two with people I know from here and have a laugh.
What I DON'T like, is the idea of wandering off into town on my own where the chances are I'll get a glass shoved in my face by a couple of the local hooligans.
There will be many reasons for blokes coming to these boards, most different to mine.
Sex God
Oh go on. You start first. Why are you here and what do you want? 
Warming the Bed
Well, to be perfectly honest, first arrived here as the whole idea of swinging fascinated me, and just, like you, read and watched.
Then placed an ad, answered some ads, but nothing happened - had no reponses/no replies (apart from the obligatory spam).
BUT always ended up back at the forums.
I have really started to enjoy the forums, and am contributing here and there (in a small way so far!) and have yet to say anything to incur any wrath from anyone (touch wood - ooerr!!) so am just enjoying being part of the community.
So, no real expectations, just enjoying myself and hoping to someday lose my newbie status and contribute regularly to the community (oh, I can dream!!!!!) :rascal:
D
Then placed an ad, answered some ads, but nothing happened - had no reponses/no replies (apart from the obligatory spam).
BUT always ended up back at the forums.
I have really started to enjoy the forums, and am contributing here and there (in a small way so far!) and have yet to say anything to incur any wrath from anyone (touch wood - ooerr!!) so am just enjoying being part of the community.
So, no real expectations, just enjoying myself and hoping to someday lose my newbie status and contribute regularly to the community (oh, I can dream!!!!!) :rascal:
D
Orgasminator
I dont need lesons chaps, and yes parrot, ive read some of your posts, i only ask the question because sometimes some of the pretentious, stuff spouted by some on here, just begs belief, hey yes they are free to do so, but for gods sake, am i the only one who can recognize the crap thats said, just to try to fit in, be one of the in crowd.?
Sex God
I don't think there's any particular "in" crowd really.
It's just a matter of joining in and getting known. Before you know it you'll have worn your typing fingers to the bone, met a few peeps from the site, and be a "regular"
Just go with whatever you feel comfortable with and I'm sure you'll have a great time!
:wink: :rascal:
It's just a matter of joining in and getting known. Before you know it you'll have worn your typing fingers to the bone, met a few peeps from the site, and be a "regular"
Just go with whatever you feel comfortable with and I'm sure you'll have a great time!
:wink: :rascal: Umm well im brand spankingly new here, and here for the same reason as darkniven, this scene (is that the best phrase?) interests me, im only 24 and yes, do look on myself as thinking "am i a bit young" but I'm beginning to see from the posts people on here write that it isn't middle-agism etc etc that I initially thought (slap me now for thinking that)...
umm, ok, rant over...
umm, ok, rant over...
Orgasminator
Dave, i thought a certain lady from teeside was " always in the driving seat, " More tea dave" 
Sex God
Hi Benji! 
Welcome to SH! 
I originally joined to find folk to swing with. I then found the friendships and that is what I am here for at the moment. The fun and the banter.
:kiss:
Gem. x
Welcome to SH! I originally joined to find folk to swing with. I then found the friendships and that is what I am here for at the moment. The fun and the banter.
:kiss:
Gem. x
Sex God
i expect nothing except what is offered
i'm part of no clique and don't want to be
i enjoy coming in and as us irish say 'havin the craic' (WHILE WISHING TO B LICKING IT)
open ur mind and all wil b understood even me
i'm part of no clique and don't want to be
i enjoy coming in and as us irish say 'havin the craic' (WHILE WISHING TO B LICKING IT)
open ur mind and all wil b understood even me
Orgasminator
Quote by Eagerslut9
I don't think there's any particular "in" crowd really.
It's just a matter of joining in and getting known. Before you know it you'll have worn your typing fingers to the bone, met a few peeps from the site, and be a "regular"
Just go with whatever you feel comfortable with and I'm sure you'll have a great time!
Ive been a member for approx 18 months, and ive been to a couple of munchs, so not that new, and i dont consider myself a newbie, however my point is directed at some guys on here, talking absolute crap, why not be honest, and yes have a laugh, and sometimes, disagree, but come on, SOME guys try to put across that thier so good, there godlike.(not talking about sexual prowess) My point is too the more experienced on here they must look bloody stupid and arnt doing themselves any favours in the long run. and above all i would have thought you may have recognised that.
Orgasminator
Quote by Dave__Notts
Dave, i thought a certain lady from teeside was " always in the driving seat, " More tea dave"
She always is :lol:
But I can't remember you being brave to her face :lol:
Dave_Notts
Nope totaly agree, mind you do make good tea Dave, :lol: ,
DAVE MORE TEA, Yes dear Wilki do me a favor and nick some of A's crystals, off the light fittng :shock: :lol: sorry mate it had to come out
Orgasminator
Erm ? do explain?
Quote by Wilki
Ive been a member of this forum for quite a while now, and i must admit, watched and read, more than contributed.
So why are you here? and what do you expect and want?
Iam here for the sex I'd be a liar if I said otherwise, but common sense dictates that a single male in the swingers world has a short lifespan, they either become frustrated and run off cursing or become accepted into the club so to speak.
Therefore my expectations are low (not for the lack of trying) so Iam simply here to have a laugh and chat with people who have a similar lifestyle to my own, and if sex does happen it's a bonus, but Iam not holding my breath.
But I would like to be accepted into a group of swingers, but only time can bring that around, trust has to be built they have to like me thats usually useful and all that, as they say Rome was not built in a day.
well thats enough honesty from me Iam hitting the sack.
Good night people and take care
I was looking for information on swinging clubs and after doing a google I found this site. I lurked about a bit and decided to join.
Although sex was the driving force behind my joining I have no great expectations. I just liked the "community" spirit in the forums, the fact that the majority of you seem to know each other and are very friendly with each other (I won't mention newbie bating!) I felt I wanted to be part of it.
I have no idea whether this will work out for me or not in terms of being a successful swinger or not, I have my own life and my own issues to solve in real life but here it seems like a good place to escape from reality.
Also I always fantasised about the freedom and lifestyle of swingers. Freedom to express themselves socially, sexually and in any other way they do.
It's fascinating to see some of the SH members' websites and how free they are about their personalities, sexuality and tastes. Very refreshing from the "real" world I inhabit most of the time.
Hmm does that make sense?
Although sex was the driving force behind my joining I have no great expectations. I just liked the "community" spirit in the forums, the fact that the majority of you seem to know each other and are very friendly with each other (I won't mention newbie bating!) I felt I wanted to be part of it.
I have no idea whether this will work out for me or not in terms of being a successful swinger or not, I have my own life and my own issues to solve in real life but here it seems like a good place to escape from reality.
Also I always fantasised about the freedom and lifestyle of swingers. Freedom to express themselves socially, sexually and in any other way they do.
It's fascinating to see some of the SH members' websites and how free they are about their personalities, sexuality and tastes. Very refreshing from the "real" world I inhabit most of the time.
Hmm does that make sense?
Orgasminator
I am here because I enjoy swinging, both the sexual and also the social aspects of talking with people that dont have to many hangups.
Ultimatly I would like to find someone with whom I could have a relationship that included, or at the least did not pre-clude, swinging as a couple as when one of my exes and I swung it opened up a different side of the lifestyle that I would not want to ommit from a relationship.
I am probably to honest in that when a talk with a woman turns around to sex and what people want, like, or wathever in a sexual way then I openly admit that I am a swinger and also into BDSM... usually followed by them running screaming from the room, lol, but I would rather remain single than hide who and what I am and what I enjoy.
I enjoy the voyeristic and exhibitionist aspects of swinging and the interplay between more than 2 people to be very arousing on a level different, not better or worse, than making love or having sex with one person.
This is goign to sound strange, but I have not found many single people that excite me both mentally and sexually and who I feel comfortable with enough to progress to a sexual stage because in "normal life" people are more reserved. In the swinigng lifestyle and via forums and munches I get to meet a variaty of people who I feel more comfortable talking with because I know they are into sex and experimentation as much as I am, and while a couple may not swing with single males it is nice to know them on a social level... on the adverts you will most likely be blanked if you are not sexually what they are looking for.
I do not try to hide the fact that the sexual side is important to me... I am here for more than just the social side of things... but good friends is also very important!
Ultimatly I would like to find someone with whom I could have a relationship that included, or at the least did not pre-clude, swinging as a couple as when one of my exes and I swung it opened up a different side of the lifestyle that I would not want to ommit from a relationship.
I am probably to honest in that when a talk with a woman turns around to sex and what people want, like, or wathever in a sexual way then I openly admit that I am a swinger and also into BDSM... usually followed by them running screaming from the room, lol, but I would rather remain single than hide who and what I am and what I enjoy.
I enjoy the voyeristic and exhibitionist aspects of swinging and the interplay between more than 2 people to be very arousing on a level different, not better or worse, than making love or having sex with one person.
This is goign to sound strange, but I have not found many single people that excite me both mentally and sexually and who I feel comfortable with enough to progress to a sexual stage because in "normal life" people are more reserved. In the swinigng lifestyle and via forums and munches I get to meet a variaty of people who I feel more comfortable talking with because I know they are into sex and experimentation as much as I am, and while a couple may not swing with single males it is nice to know them on a social level... on the adverts you will most likely be blanked if you are not sexually what they are looking for.
I do not try to hide the fact that the sexual side is important to me... I am here for more than just the social side of things... but good friends is also very important!
I might be totally wrong and if so I apologise in advance but I thought that the whole idea was to have fun with people that you feel comfortable with .Whether that be physical fun ,social fun or both .As in life outside of "swinging" peoplewill only have sex with people they like and get on with so it stands to reason that unless you wanna pay for it the chances of getting a wham ,bam thank you mam are almost non existent .
The so called single male appears to be the scourge of the swinging scene (or so some would have you believe).thankfully most that I have spoken to dont necessarily agree with this .While I understand that there have and will continue to be the various tossers that come into the chatroom and onto the forums ,the vast majority of single males that come onto here do so with said that there are some people that appear to have been here for a while who feel the need to either ignore somebody if they are not what they are looking for sexually or interrogate them to find out if they are just after a quick shag .Lets face it we can all spot those people a mile off !!!.
I think it goes against the friendly environment that most of the people on here foster and creates tensions in the chatroom just because people are playing games or just cant be honest with other members .
Having said all this I would still maintain that this a friendly place to be and whilst there are the dickheads that try to spoil it there are also the holier than thou brigade who try to exclude people on a clique type basis .
ooh im worn out now will have to send the brain cell on holiday to recouperate
forever yours
KG
(known to inhabit the swinging wilderness that is kent )
The so called single male appears to be the scourge of the swinging scene (or so some would have you believe).thankfully most that I have spoken to dont necessarily agree with this .While I understand that there have and will continue to be the various tossers that come into the chatroom and onto the forums ,the vast majority of single males that come onto here do so with said that there are some people that appear to have been here for a while who feel the need to either ignore somebody if they are not what they are looking for sexually or interrogate them to find out if they are just after a quick shag .Lets face it we can all spot those people a mile off !!!.
I think it goes against the friendly environment that most of the people on here foster and creates tensions in the chatroom just because people are playing games or just cant be honest with other members .
Having said all this I would still maintain that this a friendly place to be and whilst there are the dickheads that try to spoil it there are also the holier than thou brigade who try to exclude people on a clique type basis .
ooh im worn out now will have to send the brain cell on holiday to recouperate
forever yours
KG
(known to inhabit the swinging wilderness that is kent )
Sex God
I joined for the swinging first and the socialising second. I had had previous experience of swinging, but since being here in SH I have done more of the socialising, and the swinging I have been involved in has been unconnected with SH people. And the socialising is great, I've made friends with a few wonderful people.
Don't know how that rates on Wilki's scale of pretentiousness....
Mike.
Don't know how that rates on Wilki's scale of pretentiousness....
Mike.
Warming the Bed
Quote by Wilki
I dont need lesons chaps, and yes parrot, ive read some of your posts, i only ask the question because sometimes some of the pretentious, stuff spouted by some on here, just begs belief, hey yes they are free to do so, but for gods sake, am i the only one who can recognize the crap thats said, just to try to fit in, be one of the in crowd.?
To help sort out my confusion here (I feel somehow that, in being honest in my answer, I've done something wrong??), what pretentious stuff are we talking about here?
Pretentious - a word which is easily used, but often mis-understood. This is the dictionary definition:
1) Claiming or demanding a position of distinction or merit, especially when unjustified.
2) Making or marked by an extravagant outward show; ostentatious.
So in order to avoid being pretentious, you have to show that your claim is justified. Here are a couple of examples that fit the definition. They both claim a position of merit, while lacking any evidence to show justification.
In facilitation terms, it is called 'The honey pot question'. Risky on an electronic forum, it leaves people unsure about what you actually want to talk about.
There is a need for clarification - do you want a discussion about peoples reasons for being here, or do you want a discussion about pretentious postings?
lhk
Kat
1) Claiming or demanding a position of distinction or merit, especially when unjustified.
2) Making or marked by an extravagant outward show; ostentatious.
So in order to avoid being pretentious, you have to show that your claim is justified. Here are a couple of examples that fit the definition. They both claim a position of merit, while lacking any evidence to show justification.
Quote by Wilki
but for gods sake, am i the only one who can recognize the crap thats said, just to try to fit in, be one of the in crowd.?
Quote by WilkiYou started off by asking a question "Why are you here?" . You have had some good, honest, thoughtful answers to your question, and you have ignored the lot of them in favour of moving the discussion on to your own agenda.
My point is too the more experienced on here they must look bloody stupid and arnt doing themselves any favours in the long run. and above all i would have thought you may have recognised that.
In facilitation terms, it is called 'The honey pot question'. Risky on an electronic forum, it leaves people unsure about what you actually want to talk about.
There is a need for clarification - do you want a discussion about peoples reasons for being here, or do you want a discussion about pretentious postings?
lhk
Kat
Sex God
Quote by KitKat
In facilitation terms, it is called 'The honey pot question'. Risky on an electronic forum, it leaves people unsure about what you actually want to talk about.
There is a need for clarification - do you want a discussion about peoples reasons for being here, or do you want a discussion about pretentious postings?
lhk
Kat
Excellent point Kat, there is definitely a whiff of agenda here, but it shows how good-hearted people on here are that they continue posting and being honest and open anyway.
One more thing, if it's in an online discussion, surely it would be the "hunni" pot question?
Mike.
I was just being pretentious. Oh - and the original question - which I can answer despite being married and on here now as a couple.
When I first arrived, it was on my own, and without Kit's knowledge. My reasons for being here were these:
Kit and I had discussed threesomes as a fantasy. I felt that I wanted to make it a reality, and felt the internet was the best place to start. Kit had a HUGE distrust of internet sex sites, and may well have responded with a resounding 'NO' if I had suggested joining one. So I snuck on in secret. My purpose was to find out if it was safe for us to use the internet to find sexual partners to fulfill our fantasies.
So I joined SH and spent my time getting to know the people on here. Once I was sure that it was safe, I confessed all to Kit. Even then, for weeks Kit would have nothing to do with the site. Nothing to do with the people, just because it was a sex internet site.
So, in a nutshell, me being here as a single bloke was a test.
lhk
Kat
