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Addiction To Swinging Heaven
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Sex God
I opened a rehabilitation clinic for Swinging Heaven addicts who want to return to the normal world.
I had to close it because I didn't get a single customer. Not even when I offered to pay them for treatment.
I had to close it because I didn't get a single customer. Not even when I offered to pay them for treatment.
Hello corrie
I'm afraid it is terminal, there is no hope for you now.
Things is we all enjoy a laugh and we all love sexy fun, so we are alike already. Then it is easier to type something to a group than to say face to face (I think)
I am just a month into this and look forward to reading all the 'articles' and find myself getting to know people through their writing.
Don't feel guilty, just enjoy playtime!
I'm afraid it is terminal, there is no hope for you now.
Things is we all enjoy a laugh and we all love sexy fun, so we are alike already. Then it is easier to type something to a group than to say face to face (I think)
I am just a month into this and look forward to reading all the 'articles' and find myself getting to know people through their writing.
Don't feel guilty, just enjoy playtime!
Eeeermmm, my name is Bilko and errr, I'm a SwingaHolic !!! (waits for applause)
I was doing a search one day for climbing frames and garden play equipment for my toddler son. I tried putting in Swings and Slides and this is where I ended up. My son hasn't seen me since and my wife thinks I have moved out.
I hate you all for ruining my life. My wife has had another baby since I popped in here and I've never met him or her!! I've forgotten where the pub is and can't remember the names of my former best mates.
I fell asleep last night wondering how Jags' night went, how Fred and Wilma's weekend was going and what promotions we can put on to bring people into the GFZ. I'm worried now because Sappho is poorly, am becoming twitchy because Gman hasn't been around for a while, and found myself relieved that Kit came back from her trip away unscathed and was happy for Kat because she had returned!!
I spend too much time thinking about how Artificers ferrets are and what Carpy is writing in his notebook. In my mind Will looks like this :shock: and Dawn like this :silly: I was depressed because Mal's hot date was postponed and was concerned that Blue would catch the flu playing out in the cold weather the other night.
Addicted to SH ??? No not me !!!!!
ANYONE THINKING OF JOINING US, THE DOOR IS OVER THERE. RUN AND KEEP RUNNING UNTIL YOU CAN RUN NO MORE. IT’S TOO LATE FOR ME BUT YOU SAVE YOURSELVES NOW WHILE YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE
P.S. Since posting this I have been worried that Steve G will be upset because I didn't mention him !!!
I was doing a search one day for climbing frames and garden play equipment for my toddler son. I tried putting in Swings and Slides and this is where I ended up. My son hasn't seen me since and my wife thinks I have moved out.
I hate you all for ruining my life. My wife has had another baby since I popped in here and I've never met him or her!! I've forgotten where the pub is and can't remember the names of my former best mates.
I fell asleep last night wondering how Jags' night went, how Fred and Wilma's weekend was going and what promotions we can put on to bring people into the GFZ. I'm worried now because Sappho is poorly, am becoming twitchy because Gman hasn't been around for a while, and found myself relieved that Kit came back from her trip away unscathed and was happy for Kat because she had returned!!
I spend too much time thinking about how Artificers ferrets are and what Carpy is writing in his notebook. In my mind Will looks like this :shock: and Dawn like this :silly: I was depressed because Mal's hot date was postponed and was concerned that Blue would catch the flu playing out in the cold weather the other night.
Addicted to SH ??? No not me !!!!!
ANYONE THINKING OF JOINING US, THE DOOR IS OVER THERE. RUN AND KEEP RUNNING UNTIL YOU CAN RUN NO MORE. IT’S TOO LATE FOR ME BUT YOU SAVE YOURSELVES NOW WHILE YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE
P.S. Since posting this I have been worried that Steve G will be upset because I didn't mention him !!!
Oh Sarge darling, you really have got it bad. Welcome to our world!!! Keep attending the GFZ weekly and we will see you through it. You are halfway there Sarge as you have admitted to the group that you have a problem. You do realise that you will always be a recovering swingaholic and you must take each day as it comes. If the temptation to reach for the keyboard becomes too much then please do not hesitate to call.
Love
Wilma
x x x x
Love
Wilma
x x x x
Sarge,
do you think that there maybe a 12 ponit plan to cure the addiction?
I am about but I currently have a man putting two holes in the roof.... just so as when I am clseted in my Garret I can actually get some fresh air...Like You and others Sagre, it is difficult to tear oneself away.... do you think there is any truth in the suggestion that SH inveigles it's way onto your registry settings? or is it just a nervous twitch that causes it to start up whenever I go online?
maybe see you in GFZ Sarge, depends how the roof goes.
and Heather.... I have roofers plasters sparkies and plumbers all in da house today.... fancy coming and taking your pick? place looks like a bomb has hit it.... Roll on next weekend!!
in the meantime back to writing more of those "real" stiories!!!"
Great post Sarge... yet again!!! so annoying!!!
Gman
do you think that there maybe a 12 ponit plan to cure the addiction?
I am about but I currently have a man putting two holes in the roof.... just so as when I am clseted in my Garret I can actually get some fresh air...Like You and others Sagre, it is difficult to tear oneself away.... do you think there is any truth in the suggestion that SH inveigles it's way onto your registry settings? or is it just a nervous twitch that causes it to start up whenever I go online?
maybe see you in GFZ Sarge, depends how the roof goes.
and Heather.... I have roofers plasters sparkies and plumbers all in da house today.... fancy coming and taking your pick? place looks like a bomb has hit it.... Roll on next weekend!!
in the meantime back to writing more of those "real" stiories!!!"
Great post Sarge... yet again!!! so annoying!!!
Gman
Addicted? Me? I can break this habit any time, any time at all! So what that I've been in here daily since November 11, that I check what's happening first thing in the morning in my PJs and my sleep pattern is buggered because I can't bear to leave it at night?
Oh, who am I kidding?
I'd rather give up smoking than the forum. Oh, I'm doing that aren't I? Okay, well I'd rather give up sex than the forum - but you're not going to insist on that are you? Please?
Sappho xxx
Oh, who am I kidding?
I'd rather give up smoking than the forum. Oh, I'm doing that aren't I? Okay, well I'd rather give up sex than the forum - but you're not going to insist on that are you? Please?Sappho xxx
Sarge as ever BRILL!!!! we are both sitting here laughing at your comments 
:lol: :lol: .
I too am an addict they say that admitting it is the first road to recovery, but I dont think I could ever recover.
Yes I have to have my fix at least twice a day first thing in the morning and again at night,
if I'm home during the day and the opportunity is there I'll grab another!
It is starting to take over chores aren't getting done, people are starting to notice.
My God I nearly became a dealer the other day, felt myself thinking of telling others about the site but..... no..no.. got to keep it to myself it's MINE ALL MINE!!.. HUHUM.... Sorry about that. No I dont want to kick this habit, love Sarge's wit too much and gman's wisdom.
Sappho get well soon : :rose:
:lol: :lol: .I too am an addict they say that admitting it is the first road to recovery, but I dont think I could ever recover.
Yes I have to have my fix at least twice a day first thing in the morning and again at night,
if I'm home during the day and the opportunity is there I'll grab another!
It is starting to take over chores aren't getting done, people are starting to notice.
My God I nearly became a dealer the other day, felt myself thinking of telling others about the site but..... no..no.. got to keep it to myself it's MINE ALL MINE!!.. HUHUM.... Sorry about that. No I dont want to kick this habit, love Sarge's wit too much and gman's wisdom.
Sappho get well soon : :rose:
Sarge as ever BRILL!!!! we are both sitting here laughing at your comments :lol: :lol: .
ISnip
My God I nearly became a dealer the other day, felt myself thinking of telling others about the site but..... no..no.. got to keep it to myself it's MINE ALL MINE!!.. HUHUM.... Sorry about that. No I dont want to kick this habit, love Sarge's wit too much and gman's wisdom.
:[/quote
Funcouple.... so good of you to say
Thank you
Gman!!!
ops:
:lol: :lol: .ISnip
My God I nearly became a dealer the other day, felt myself thinking of telling others about the site but..... no..no.. got to keep it to myself it's MINE ALL MINE!!.. HUHUM.... Sorry about that. No I dont want to kick this habit, love Sarge's wit too much and gman's wisdom.
:[/quote
Funcouple.... so good of you to say
Thank you
Gman!!!
ops: Quote by DJohn
I opened a rehabilitation clinic for Swinging Heaven addicts who want to return to the normal world.
I had to close it because I didn't get a single customer. Not even when I offered to pay them for treatment.
Sorry to diagree with an Australian DJohn-just in case you put a bucket on your head and change your name to Kelly-but this IS the normal world. I've dropped out of the other one due to lack of interest.
But addicted...me...no, no, no,NO...
My chain saw is rusty due to lack of use, my children think I've been lost in a snow drift and have erected a monument on the lawn in my memory, my wife can't remember my name, I've started signing 'Artificer' on cheques, I can't face pizza anymore, where did Christmas go?, I was worried when England thraped Scotland in case I got a slap from Jags, Somebody quoted Shakespeare and before I knew it I blurted out that, yes, I had a PM from him last night (should have seen their face), I found myself scanning my 'Oxford Book of Quotations' under 'F' for Flintstone, I've stopped worrying about the tax-man because I feel I've got a mate there, George Dubyah has started sounding sensible :shock: , I can't read about the real 'Posh n Becks without smurking and wondering how DJ's 'Big Deck' is recovering, I can't understand how real wine bottles get emptied-they're always full in GFZ, people are wondering where I get all these jokes from, I've bought a shelf full of books that were recommended on the site, I've started looking suspiciously at EVERYONE I meet and wondering if I might know them by another name, I found myself rummaging around Waterstones looking for the latest from Carpathian, I notice every discarded KitKat wrapper and I really believe that Bilko drives a little tank.
so, addicted? What do you think.
Artificer
Village idiot
Sex God
Another addict here!! It is hard to let a day pass without checking out the Forum. There are people here who have now become very real and close friends - and others I am looking forward to meeting.
Of course, there is also a VERY special reason why I couldn't give up, even if I wanted to (which I don't). :inlove:
Which reminds me........
Of course, there is also a VERY special reason why I couldn't give up, even if I wanted to (which I don't). :inlove:
Which reminds me........
Quote by SapphoBloody hell!! :eeek: Don't do things like that. Even in jest!! reaches for cloth to wipe tea off the screen, walls, Kylie calendar etc.
Okay, well I'd rather give up sex than the forum - but you're not going to insist on that are you? Please?
Quote by SargeCrikey, that's scarily accurate - who have you been talking to? :shock:
In my mind Will looks like this :shock:
Sex God
I have an excuse for my addiction 
. As a moderator, I have to log on at least three times a day to make sure the rest of you are behaving yourselves :grin:
. As a moderator, I have to log on at least three times a day to make sure the rest of you are behaving yourselves :grin: Excellent Articifer,
So much of what you say is so true, and yes I too look at peeps in real life and wonder, last time I was in Stockport I was checking for little tanks and military types with black rimmed specs!!!
and every time I go into Wigan ( which is often) I am always looking at the blondes aged 30ish and wondering if underneath those Wigan clothes maybe a wench in a avatar looking playsuit!
:)
Gman
So much of what you say is so true, and yes I too look at peeps in real life and wonder, last time I was in Stockport I was checking for little tanks and military types with black rimmed specs!!!
and every time I go into Wigan ( which is often) I am always looking at the blondes aged 30ish and wondering if underneath those Wigan clothes maybe a wench in a avatar looking playsuit!
:) Gman
Quote by corrie
I am in stitches here. I have logged on even more today than ever before! I have even considered throwing away my leggings and getting some stockings to wear when Im on the forum. Heavenly mother I am hooked
Whoah! Be careful Corrie..don't want to lose you before we've met. Just think of the static electricity surrounding computer +nylons!! You could end up like a Van De Graaf generator. Make sure you wear wellingtons, rubber pants and rubber gloves.........then send me and Sarge a piccy
:lol: Sex God
Quote by Sappho
Okay, well I'd rather give up sex than the forum - but you're not going to insist on that are you?
Psst, Sappho... c'mere... (whispering) if you can't give up sex, come up and visit me. I won't tell them, honest.
As for giving up the forum - absurd! I'm amazed you can even think it.
