Well there's far more common things than HIV that you can catch. Most of them can be unpleasant and lead to other more serious illness if left unchecked.
People probably get hung up on it because in the swinging fraternity many people want to feel free to have sex without conducting an interview as to whether you've been cleared by the GUM clinic since you last had it with someone else.
But I guess it depends on your preferences for partners - eg whether it is anyone who happens along or someone that you know really well. Even then you can't be sure can you.
Sounds like you've been lucky.
The luckier people think they are going to be - the riskier it gets. I believe reports are that many of the more common STIs are on the increase in the middle age groups in particular.
Pays yer money and takes yer choice. I don't think anyone has a right to challenge someone for insisting on protected sex in the same way that you obviously reserve your right to go bareback. What people do have a right to do though is to not have sex with you.
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I'm a bit perplexed about the distinction you made between straight males and not so.
I hope it's not a remainder of that weird notion that wants HIV to be the "gay disease"..
as far as I know, HIV is on the rise in several european countries too, due to a new surge of unprotected sex, as opposed to a few decades of condom-frenzy.
I might be wrong though.
anyway, there are enough STDs around for me not to want to risk them. I'll only ever have bareback sex (as much as I do prefer it to wearing a condom) with girls who I believe to be considerate enough to be selective in their search for bedtime partners.
also, for me, the consideration a girl met online might be lying about being on the pill is a scary one, even more scary in fact than the risk of contracting say, gonhorrea.
the last thing I want from any meets "arranged online" is to be asked to perform a DNA test and pay maintenance for the rest of my life for an unplanned and unwanted child.
hi brucie, is this the male or female part of the couple?
there are risks associated with most things that give us a thrill. i guess the reson most people chose touse condomsis that fact that AIDS is real and is a killer, and still holds so much stigma if people knew you had it.
the risk of one shag with a person you may never see again,know very little about regarding their sexual,drug using, medical history just isnt worth that risk.
im very pleased you are ok, but remember to go back in 6 months wont you.
xx fem xx
oh additional in edit,melting yes i agree with you there, as much as we like to think peopel are responsible, i know of at least 10 women/girls who have gone out an dhad sex unprotected while not using contraception and then dragged a guy through csa etc.
i guess thats a whole other thread. but i know AIDS is a killer, but lets not forget the devestating impact of a unwanted pregnancy/child can be.
i know the guy shoud have worn a condom, but omg to be left knowing you have a child out there that you didnt want, to a woman you probally dont even like and the financial commitment for 19 years,the follow on imact when you do meet a woman you love have your first child together, but it never really is your first child is it.??
sorry soapbox -off
xx fem xx
The fatalities due to HIV have only been delayed, not stopped, due to new medication. Those drugs have rather dramatic side effects and frequently cause more problems than they solve. The disease will still lead to the early death of those infected. They can also still infect those they exchange body fluids with.
Hardly a great achievement.
There is also Hep C...which is just as silent a killer as HIV.
I don't think it remarkable you have remained uninfected with HIV, but it is quite impressive that you have remained uninfected with gonorrhea or chlamydia.
Hmmmm interesting thread.
I believe the preveleance of HIV in "straight" men and women is on the increase- world wide. However it is not an "easy" disease to catch.
BUT the real problems in this day and age is the increase in older STD's such as Gonorrhoea and Syphillis. Hep B & C are also a major problem. And dont forget Chlamydia; this disease known for years as NSU (non specific urethritis) was only thought to affect men until lots of women were having problems conceiving a child and were found to have scared and blocked fallopian tubes through Chlamydia.
SO moral of the story- HIV is just one of a multitude of problems that we should protect ourselves and one another from.
Wench (on a soap box!!)
xxxxxxxxxx
Of course straight men can't get HIV. Just as white men can't jump. Scousers have perms and steal. Londoners all speak in rhyming slang. Scottish people all wear tartan etc etc.
splendid attempting to see the screen through the :bs:
I think its a matter of personal choice.
In terms of risk, there are millions of heterosexual men and women in sub saharan africa with hiv and not quite such a high proportion in western europe.
I prefer to take all reasonable precautions against all consequences which includes condoms.
wow.
as other people have said, HIV isn't the only thing you should be worried about.
chlamydia in my age group is on the increase, and 3 in 4 people with HIV will not have been diagnosed with it yet. (university STI campaign went around when valentine's day was coming up). anyway, many STIs are seemingly symptomless, and in terms of chlamydia, don't have nearly half as devastating an effect on men as they do women. the fact that you think people are making 'a huge fuss' is ridiculous. straight people can contract HIV from unprotected sex with someone who got HIV through sharing needles or other blood transfer. you are not immune just because you're only having sex with women, who is to say that the other people they have sex with only have sex with women?
it's like that old fact they tell you in high school: the bacteria from someone's spit can stay in your mouth for weeks or months after you've kissed them, so theoretically if you kiss someone you're kissing every other person they've kissed within that time period. and it's the same with sex. honestly I thought that only guys my age had this cavalier attitude to sex. gross.
As folk have already said, it's not just about HIV :shock:
Maybe, with such arrogant complacency, he should get his eyes around the data
how to win shags and influence people :shock:
Its quite possible the OP has only said this bollox to just get a rise from people.
i know what hes doing is very sily and risky, but hes not actually forcing anyone to have sex with him without using a condom.
its his decision, and the decision of those he sleeps with. as long as he is being honest so the other party knows the weight of the risk.
we can all pounce on him, but hes entitled to do what he wants.
the fact he hasnt caught anything, and several people like him are probally playing the same way is reinforcing this attitude.
his post hilights what sadely alot of people are doing/thinking or else why would stds be on the rise?
yes his post may have caused a stir, but hey its bought the reality of stds back to the front of the minds of the dangerous players.
xx fem xx
In my ever so humble opinion, (and don't dare tell me I'm wrong lol), the HIV virus isn't the most easily caught. A straight man having normal vaginal intercourse with a woman is unlikely to be infected even if she is. But one should surely consider the feelings of ones partner, however casual. You see it doesn't work the other way round. If it is the man that is infected he will secrete bodily fluids into the woman's vagina, even if he doesn't ejaculate. Going back to your original point there are still potential hazards. If you get a little carried away and the sex is rough, or you simply cut your penis on a pubic hair you then run the risk of the females bodily fluids entering your bloodstream. Then of course there is the possibility of going on to anal and still not using protection, which would be just as risky as having unprotected anal sex with another male.
Also as has been pointed out already there are many different and highly unpleasant if not deadly stds. I see unprotected casual sex as a kind of Russian Roulette, I'm not holding a gun to my head, loaded or not.
Can anyone get HIV?
yes and the more partners the more chances.
Well before launching into the usual SH condemnation of someone, it might be worth considering that; the clinics are regularly full of people who are being tested. Presumably they have symptoms or have had unprotected sex. In a busy clinic its probably about a hundred a day, maybe more. So perhaps the fact that so many are appearing to have tests would indicate some truth in the lack of safe sex. So on that point, there might just be a point.
Equally if the op's sex life has included several partners, 200? Then these people are involved in bareback also. And if they are all gleaned from 'vanilla' conventional encounters, then perhaps there is a change in attitude, out there.
If a responsible couple wish to perform bareback, then they can easily arrange to visit a clinic together and confirm their doubts. How many people actually do that? Do you? Honestly?
sorry but i think you are mad!!!!! i know its all down to personal choice but a shag to me is for fun and the risk of having unprotected sex is not one iam prepared to take ever!!!! say you sleep with i dunno 10 peple a month without a condom and each 10 of them have also slept with 10 a month by the end of the year to me its the same as sleeping with hundreds without a condom and that aint a nice thought at all sorry but to me i think you need a different doctor and i aint talking bout at the gum clinic lol. you have been very lucky but just remember the luck wont last forever and you will get infected with something. what will happen in the future when you want to settle down and have a family and if you have caught something? im sure your partner would be over the moon!!!!! do you realise some std's can cause infurtility? sorry for the rant and the crap spellings lol but life is not a game of russian roulette its about choices and remember the choices you make now can screw your life up.
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