Isn't it just simply bad manners and downright rudeness to "blank" anyone in this situation? (Actually in my opinion in any situation - it seems to show a certain kind of arrogance). If one approaches two or more people standing/sitting/talking tegether In my opinion one should introduce yourself to all parties and see where the conversation leads no matter what the setting. (Why should it be any different because you are at a munch or social?) perhaps I'm jjust a little old I can talk for England I am a little shy and awkward in larger social gathereings but I am so looking forward to the opportunity to meting so many of the people I've come know just a little of on this forum. I may forget my own name if asked or even where I left my car keys but I know I will never forget my manners.
We have been to a few munches and have found the singles to be polite and chatty to both of us....we have gone to clubs on a couple of occasions and have found some single guys ignore me but get chatting to the wife....which she soon brings into the conversation that we don't play with singles....they then make their excuses and dissappear....don't blame them really.....i do make a habit of trying to talk to a couple at the same time if the timing is right and always try to bring everyone involved into the conversation.....
Well my view as a single is that I have to be interested in both for it to go any further so blanking one of a coupe would just not be within my remit! If I liked one person out of a couple, but not the other - then what would be the point? In a purely social setting , again - I think it would be downright rude to just show interest in one!
Just my POV.
aRSexx :color:
I'm with Fabio and Bows on this one. If I don't get on with both partners then it can feel uncomfortable. I also tlak to both - you can never have too many new friends!
All the couples I've met I've talked because I wanted to. I enjoy socialising, and I would not blank one out and talk to the other...that's just damn rude in ANY situation....
Ive not met anyone socialy in any kind of swinging situation. Talking from a personal view point if anyone was to aproach Mrs Tweeky and try and talk to her and ignore me I have to say they would be getting the push off and maybe more if they didnt behave after that. Sorry but there is no excuse for rudeness.
Mr Tweeky
it's already been said. it's the height of bad manners, simple as. even if your primary interest, sexually, is in one half of the couple, only engaging with one of them is crass, ignorant, and just plain stupid, all of which are hardly attractive qualities! you're asking both these people to allow you into their bed, and yet dismiss one of them like they're not even there? :doh:
i actually want to engage with both, because for me, i want to feel comfy myself with both of them, and know they're both comfy with me. doing anything but that is a recipe for disaster, and spectacurlarly misses the point!
neil x x x ;)
Well said neil .....Totally agree if u r part of a couple u shud be spoken to as a couple..hight ov bad manners..
OMG ............ where do you even start on this one !
HLB and Dammy .......... I think part of the problem is that people dont see us as "Real Couples" because we all joined the site as something else.......... before turning "Real" :giggle:
It happens to us too .............. Men chat to me and Ignore Steve and women chat to Steve and ignore me ............ we normally just move on as quickly as possible.
IT IS JUST PLAIN RUDE & BAD MANNERS
The majority of the people on the site are great ........... but in all walks of life there are ignorant individuals !
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
This is not a bashing of singles at all ............. so please dont stamp on me :giggle:
I once approached a stunning Japanese couple in a club one night, and died completely. The Japanese have some very formal social rules which they apply in varying strengths.
Their own particular preference was to watch and listen and then present people with a contact card. Which I didn't know until later in the evening.
But in most occasions I think I was attracted to or by one of the couples' partners and got into a chat. Soon enough the other half appeared and introductions went around, and all order was established. Some of those encounters resulted in a meet.
But sometimes its a fine line and you can get it quite wrong. Its possible to mis-read people and get the timing wrong. Or miss the signs and/or avoid people. So one has to tread carefully.
Although neither of us can think of specfic incidents we do notice that I get chatted to more, or I can arrange meets a lot easier, but tbh we put that down to me being the gobby one and Morbius being the quiet :!: one.
We kept it quiet for a long time that we play as singles as we don't want the rush of single males, but it's been known for a while now and doesn't seem to have affected us.
I can't think of any instances where someone blanked either of us, would find it the height of rudeness if they did.
C x
i guess its all been said, and everyone seems to agree. the truth is that swingers are people and have feelings just like everybody else.
i often go to clubs as a single, and the only way to talk to couples is as a couple. although i suppose talking is a bit alien to some guys who think the women are just sex toys for their pleasure. there are other places that cater for those types but i guess they object to paying for it as well.
sometimes we go as a couple, and we really appreciate it if a single comes to chat to us both - it makes it a conversation rather than just a pickup. and as many others have said, you can still flirt with a couple!
I can appreciate how it can be annoying (to say the least) when a single chats away to one half of a couple, when the couple want to be treated as a couple. However, just to throw a different perspective into the pot… that’s not always the case is it?
It must be confusing to some people sometimes as to what is the right thing to do – both for singles and couples if they have been exposed to different situations and behaviours in swinging. To elaborate…
I frequently visit a swinging club – which I have to say has particularly well mannered single guys. On many an occasion I have witnessed the following:
The male of a couple sitting elsewhere so the female becomes more approachable to the guys and then once the female has sorted out the nitty-gritty – back comes the male part of the couple to close the deal (as it were).
The male of the couple expressing “Don’t ask me mate – she does all the choosingâ€
The female going off to a quiet corner, whilst the male half goes up to the bar to engage in conversation with their perspective target.
One half of the couple moving to talk to a single and the other staying put or moving to talk to someone else.
Away from the club there are a few more situations…
In many an ad there is expressed the need for the women to be happy with the situation first, before even a social meeting.
The amount of couples I have spoken to where only one part of the couple wants to do all of the arranging – I find it strange and I tend to avoid this type of situation, but it is so common.
Situations where they have seen couples circulate separately, flirting and fooling around with others (yet not knowing these people already know each other).
I am sure there must also be situations where someone feels more at easy to chat to one half of a couple as they have conversed (and even flirted) more with that person in the chatroom or wherever. Thus giving a feeling of knowing one of the couple and the other being a stranger.
There may be situations where there is no intention of trying to arrange playing – but there is something they want to talk about with one person who happens to be in a couple. Mainly because the couple have their own individual persona on the forum or in the chatroom and they feel they have some common interest or they just wanted to talk about something they found interesting.
However, personally I fail to see the point in blanking one half of a couple if you want to ‘play’ with the couple. We all have our own personal versions of swinging etiquette – even if there are many common factors, there is usually something different in the small print. We build our own expectations through our own experiences. Some people have had different experiences and some are still trying to learn as they go along – learning from their piers and through observation. Depending on what they have observed – is it any wonder some get it wrong.
Just a final thought…
Would it be as annoying if the female of one couple came over and chatted away to the female of another couple – complimenting her on her dress, asking where she got her shoes from and a load of other girlie chat. Talking about things of little interest to the male?
Very true Polo. There's a lot to be said for the confident, experienced couple. They are quite at ease working a function separately but keep in touch as and when either help or introductions are needed.
Needless to say those replies get deleted straight away...
we allways make sure everyone involved so theres no upset feelings or anything with ppl . so everyone has fun all round 
)
tricky one to work out i spose, especially since we both play as singles, and as a couple, which means that depending on the context, well . . . well i wouldn't like to work it out. 
