Why can't women judge sizes or amounts? Or is it just Alex?
It is 11 days to go before Christmas and the kichen is overflowing with food. The freezer is packed out, the cupboards are so full we have had to start loading on top. I am even thinking that the cupboards may need extra supports added at the bottom to take the weight of food. There is only four of us but enough food to feed a fecking continent. Not only the amount but individual pieces are extremely large.
I have had to put away half a bloody pig in the freezer..........and the piece of beef she brought home for Sunday dinner looked like half a cow. She told me "It isn't that large.....and it will shrink when we cook it". Like feck it will. Even if it shrank by half it would still feed half the estate. Her excuse was that it was half price. I would have paid half the price for the size we usually get.......not Alex......she spent the same amount and got the extra meat.
So we sat down for tea with this beef on Sunday...........and sandwiches for lunch at work today..........and fecking tea tonight.........plus I have fed the local stray cat that comes in for a feed, and its fecking mates and I am still left with something that resembles the hind leg of a cow. I have got that fed up of beef I have wrapped it and put it in the freezer......thats after trying to make room by pulling and pushing and stomping and pressing till I managed to get the fecker in.
I just give up.
Dave_Notts
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Does size matter?
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Sex God
Quote by Dave__Notts
Why can't women judge sizes or amounts? Or is it just Alex?
It is 11 days to go before Christmas and the kichen is overflowing with food. The freezer is packed out, the cupboards are so full we have had to start loading on top. I am even thinking that the cupboards may need extra supports added at the bottom to take the weight of food. There is only four of us but enough food to feed a fecking continent. Not only the amount but individual pieces are extremely large.
I have had to put away half a bloody pig in the freezer..........and the piece of beef she brought home for Sunday dinner looked like half a cow. She told me "It isn't that large.....and it will shrink when we cook it". Like feck it will. Even if it shrank by half it would still feed half the estate. Her excuse was that it was half price. I would have paid half the price for the size we usually get.......not Alex......she spent the same amount and got the extra meat.
So we sat down for tea with this beef on Sunday...........and sandwiches for lunch at work today..........and fecking tea tonight.........plus I have fed the local stray cat that comes in for a feed, and its fecking mates and I am still left with something that resembles the hind leg of a cow. I have got that fed up of beef I have wrapped it and put it in the freezer......thats after trying to make room by pulling and pushing and stomping and pressing till I managed to get the fecker in.
I just give up.
Dave_Notts
So what time should we be round?
Sex God
Quote by Witchy
I am a woman. :shock:
And I'm much better than most blokes I know at guesstimating quantities. :smug:
I got a load of concrete right down to the last (hand) shovel load once. :smile:
Definitely eating at Dave_knotts
Sex God
Dave, I love you, and want to have your babies! 
You are the voice of reason, and no mistake. 
*shows thread to Gem, mimes size of freezer, versus size of pig, tries to explain that just cos summat is half price, it don't mean it's a bargain must buy, not unless you actually have storage space for aforesaid humongous dead animal*
N x x x ;)
You are the voice of reason, and no mistake. *shows thread to Gem, mimes size of freezer, versus size of pig, tries to explain that just cos summat is half price, it don't mean it's a bargain must buy, not unless you actually have storage space for aforesaid humongous dead animal*
N x x x ;)
Sex God
Quote by neilinleeds
Dave, I love you, and want to have your babies!
*shows thread to Gem, mimes size of freezer, versus size of pig, tries to explain that just cos summat is half price, it don't mean it's a bargain must buy, not unless you actually have storage space for aforesaid humongous dead animal*
N x x x ;)
Spitroast?
Then we could sort the pig out...
;-)
Sex God
I admit I did buy *a couple* of rather large joints but I have a really really large freezer that was an army operation just to get the thing into the house :scared:
See now what ya do is
Get a sharp knife
get a chopping board
Cut said bits of meat up into average size portions that you would usually cook for your family
Wrap in foil/cling film/yesterdays socks or what ever
stick a label on them
Freeze
:angel:
Usable portions at a fraction of the cost!
Don't you lot know anything :doh:
See now what ya do is
Get a sharp knife
get a chopping board
Cut said bits of meat up into average size portions that you would usually cook for your family
Wrap in foil/cling film/yesterdays socks or what ever
stick a label on them
Freeze
:angel:
Usable portions at a fraction of the cost!
Don't you lot know anything :doh:
Sex God
Tan, i've always like the look of your portions :rascal:
Sex God
Quote by meat2pleaseu
Tan, i've always like the look of your portions :rascal:
Always ample? :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by Tan--Kinky
Tan, i've always like the look of your portions :rascal:
Always ample? :giggle:
A feast of tastyness from what i've seen so far :lickface:
Sex God
Dave... more importantly have you started wrapping the presents yet?! :giggle:
I think I'm just gonna go to M&S next week and buy some kind of turkey roast type thing for myself. Can't be that hard can it?!
*remembers the omlette*
I think I'm just gonna go to M&S next week and buy some kind of turkey roast type thing for myself. Can't be that hard can it?!
*remembers the omlette*
Sex God
Quote by meat2pleaseu
Tan, i've always like the look of your portions :rascal:
Always ample? :giggle:
A feast of tastyness from what i've seen so far :lickface:
Why thank you kind sir cheques in the post :rascal:
Quote by Dirtygirly
I think I'm just gonna go to M&S next week and buy some kind of turkey roast type thing for myself. Can't be that hard can it?!
*remembers the omelette*
Its easy, really really easy just follow the instructions on the packet and if its pink don't eat it :giggle:
Sex God
Quote by Dave__Nottsdave how can ya have half a pig or cow they have 3 letters
Why can't women judge sizes or amounts? Or is it just Alex?
It is 11 days to go before Christmas and the kichen is overflowing with food. The freezer is packed out, the cupboards are so full we have had to start loading on top. I am even thinking that the cupboards may need extra supports added at the bottom to take the weight of food. There is only four of us but enough food to feed a fecking continent. Not only the amount but individual pieces are extremely large.
I have had to put away half a bloody pig in the freezer..........and the piece of beef she brought home for Sunday dinner looked like half a cow. She told me "It isn't that large.....and it will shrink when we cook it". Like feck it will. Even if it shrank by half it would still feed half the estate. Her excuse was that it was half price. I would have paid half the price for the size we usually get.......not Alex......she spent the same amount and got the extra meat.
So we sat down for tea with this beef on Sunday...........and sandwiches for lunch at work today..........and fecking tea tonight.........plus I have fed the local stray cat that comes in for a feed, and its fecking mates and I am still left with something that resembles the hind leg of a cow. I have got that fed up of beef I have wrapped it and put it in the freezer......thats after trying to make room by pulling and pushing and stomping and pressing till I managed to get the fecker in.
I just give up.
Dave_Notts
Quote by Ms_Whips
Being vegetarian I only like meat that is still alive and will fit nicely into the spaces I have for it.
still, it's unfortunate that some of the choice still appears to be past it's best by date
whips
I find that if you pinch your nose then the age of the meat is of no consequence
Quote by Ms_Whips
Being vegetarian I only like meat that is still alive and will fit nicely into the spaces I have for it.
still, it's unfortunate that some of the choice still appears to be past it's best by date
whips
I find that if you pinch your nose then the age of the meat is of no consequence
:lol2:
i believe some curry sauces were invented to cover the taste of rancid meat,i'm not sure if that would work with the meat you are obviously thinking of though
Sex God
My wife is an excelent judge of size and amount, she loves my 12" cock :haha:
Sex God
Quote by leatherednperky
Being vegetarian I only like meat that is still alive and will fit nicely into the spaces I have for it.
still, it's unfortunate that some of the choice still appears to be past it's best by date
whips
I find that if you pinch your nose then the age of the meat is of no consequence
:lol2:
i believe some curry sauces were invented to cover the taste of rancid meat,i'm not sure if that would work with the meat you are obviously thinking of though
Yup very true, in the 2nd world war used to feed troops gone off meat. This is why my Granddad would never eat a curry.
Sex God
Tis not true I tell you!
There is always need for a bit of a bargain!
We were shopping this evening to make sure the weekly food rations were in and the 'collect the reciepts' offer was fulfilled. I was armed with a list, a budget and a calculator... and a Neil.
He arrives back to the trolley, one of those smaller shallower ones so I'm not tempted to load it with things that fill it up just so the trolley looks more cosy, and presents me with a packet of Cathedral City cheese.
Me: It's not on the list. :?
Him: Ah, but will we eat it?
How much is it?
£3 for £5 worth of cheese.
Hmmmm, do we need cheese, it's not on the list?
Will we eat it though?
Well, yeah, I suppose we will... Why?
*plonks cheese triumphantly into shallow trolley in pride of place*
Because Dave_Notts says it's only a bargain if you're actually going to eat it. You know there's no point buying something at half price if we're going to only eat half of it anyway. That's no bargain.
*Neil skips off smuggly to find things actually on the list*
This thread all of a sudden makes so much more sense of my surreal shopping experience and bargain advice according to Dave_Notts! :lol:
There is always need for a bit of a bargain!
We were shopping this evening to make sure the weekly food rations were in and the 'collect the reciepts' offer was fulfilled. I was armed with a list, a budget and a calculator... and a Neil.
He arrives back to the trolley, one of those smaller shallower ones so I'm not tempted to load it with things that fill it up just so the trolley looks more cosy, and presents me with a packet of Cathedral City cheese.
Me: It's not on the list. :?
Him: Ah, but will we eat it?
How much is it?
£3 for £5 worth of cheese.
Hmmmm, do we need cheese, it's not on the list?
Will we eat it though?
Well, yeah, I suppose we will... Why?
*plonks cheese triumphantly into shallow trolley in pride of place*
Because Dave_Notts says it's only a bargain if you're actually going to eat it. You know there's no point buying something at half price if we're going to only eat half of it anyway. That's no bargain.
*Neil skips off smuggly to find things actually on the list*
This thread all of a sudden makes so much more sense of my surreal shopping experience and bargain advice according to Dave_Notts! :lol:
:laughabove::rotflmao::laughabove::rotflmao: Sex God
Quote by little gem
*plonks cheese triumphantly into shallow trolley in pride of place*
and to show your appreciation for his caveman like foraging prowess i think you should be a 'good little wifey' and serve him a cheese dish for every meal for the next week....while you eat all the nice food from the trolley
Just a quick update.
Just taken the beef out of the freezer again today and had another dinner. So far this piece of beef has made 15 roast dinners, two sets of sandwiches, fed two cats for two days (not ours, they just come in for a chomp) plus another two that wandered in..............and I still have a fecking great big plate of sliced beef left as well
I'll have to make my sandwiches with beef again tomorrow. Anybody fancy a few slices so I can get rid of it?
And for some unknown reason she went Christmas shopping and came back with two fecking turkeys :doh: There is only 4 of us!!!!! How long are we supposed to live off bloody turkey for :censored: And we still haven't defrosted the pig she dragged back last week either........I give up.
Dave_Notts
Just taken the beef out of the freezer again today and had another dinner. So far this piece of beef has made 15 roast dinners, two sets of sandwiches, fed two cats for two days (not ours, they just come in for a chomp) plus another two that wandered in..............and I still have a fecking great big plate of sliced beef left as well
I'll have to make my sandwiches with beef again tomorrow. Anybody fancy a few slices so I can get rid of it?And for some unknown reason she went Christmas shopping and came back with two fecking turkeys :doh: There is only 4 of us!!!!! How long are we supposed to live off bloody turkey for :censored: And we still haven't defrosted the pig she dragged back last week either........I give up.
Dave_Notts
Sex God
Dave, your turkey can come and have a 'manage et trois' with my bird. She's only got a quarter of a breast missing and a bit of a complex because Neil keeps ignorring her in favour of cheese and pie.
Sometimes I swear he's from Wigan the way he keeps eyeing up the pork pie in the fridge.
So, the turkey we actually had a big old supermarket in the aisle bust up about is laying forlorn and neglected in the bottom of the fridge too... along with half a packet of uneaten Cathedral City.
But the sales were oh so good. :lickface:
:devil:
I've bought lots of lovely things.
Him: so where's my things?
Me: I didn't get you anything because you said if it wasn't worth buying beofre the sale then it shouldn't be bought in the sale
Him: that only applies to the tat you insist on bringing home, not actual stuff and presents for me
Ah, so I'm allowed to buy you non tat presents in the sales. Is that how it works?
Yes *pouts and sulks a little*
*laughs*
:lol: So there you have it. The half price theory falls down. :smug:
Sometimes I swear he's from Wigan the way he keeps eyeing up the pork pie in the fridge.
So, the turkey we actually had a big old supermarket in the aisle bust up about is laying forlorn and neglected in the bottom of the fridge too... along with half a packet of uneaten Cathedral City.
But the sales were oh so good. :lickface:
:devil:
I've bought lots of lovely things.
Him: so where's my things?
Me: I didn't get you anything because you said if it wasn't worth buying beofre the sale then it shouldn't be bought in the sale
Him: that only applies to the tat you insist on bringing home, not actual stuff and presents for me
Ah, so I'm allowed to buy you non tat presents in the sales. Is that how it works?
Yes *pouts and sulks a little*
*laughs*
:lol: So there you have it. The half price theory falls down. :smug:
Sex God
You guys make me feel positively normal! 
