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Fakes and collectors

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I have seen all the replies thank you fro taking the time to comment, some of them still give me hope! im not saying that everyone is a fake or that if the dont turn up they are fakes what i mean is that people who get your pics talk dirty to you on the net then when you ask for phoine numbers or web cams they dissappear!
Just one last thing what is this AFF? can anyone tell me?
Jane
Hi wanttomunch,
I think AFF stands for Adult Friend Finder, a contact site that takes yer cash and gives little in return
I know couples and single ladies can have a problem with trophy hunters and pic collectors. I am a male looking to meet a couple, but what amazes me is the number of requests I get from what proports to be couples (but are quite clearly single guys) asking for me to write a detailed letter of what I would like to do to their "wife".
I cannot imagine what pleasure they get from reading about a guy making love to an imaginary wife! confused
Were an early 30's couple looking to swing and were not looking at the ads or doing one of our own until we get back from the erotica munch.......cant wait till the 20th...
Quote by HornyBear
I would not be too dismissive of Adult Friend Finder if you have not used it as a full member m8. I was on there for over 18 months and I found it to be very professionally put together, lots of facilities and the with over 30 chatrooms you always had choice (if not always quality).

I don't know about that... I've been a full-member on-and-off for 18 months and while the site is certainly well-designed, the implentation has often struck me as shoddy. For example, messages would often vanish from my inbox only to return a few days later. The regional searches were dodgy too - claiming that people as far away as London and Glasgow were within 50km of me in the Midlands - and often returned the same person twice, three or more times from the same search. From a technical standpoint, I was not impressed.
I also found the chatrooms pretty-much impossible to use, although I know they have changed to a different chat system since the days when I hung out in them, so maybe that's not so bad now.
Im not the brightest spark but who are all these fakes and where do they hide out? All i have seen so far on here even before the munch was genuine people.
Ive talked on msn and seen and shown pictures and ive talked to ladies on the phone, if anyone wants my pic they can just click and save it off my add and not even bother having to contact me.
Isnt a collector someone who blatantly asks for a pic that is NOT of your face?????
if they want to see more then have it on display in msn or chat on cam or tell them to go look in Playboy.
hi midlandsman
our expeirences of pic collectors are as follows
once the initial contact has been made,few messages between each other,then swap msn,chat on there,they can actually see our pics on there,but they still persist and ask us to send them more,then after a few conversations we usually ask for f-f phone call,and lo and behold,gone,done one,its was so frustrating,as we dont have lots of time,
so thats why we went down the club line,and very pleased we did,and now wanting to go to some sh munches wink
Im on the site fairly regularly, although I think this may only be my second post in the forums!
Im more into the photo ads sections, as Im actually quite seriously looking for some fun with people, and not interested in just recieving their pics, cos quite frankly I could get better pics elsewhere, know what I mean? ;o)
But, although I reply to maybe 3-4 ads a day, I have had not so much a s a sniff of any action!
Half the time people placing the ads cant even be bothered to reply with a polite NO THANKS, and if memory serves, its only happened once.
If they are placing the ads just to get a pic of me they need their heads read!
But to the honest ad-placers, who seriously want some fun with the likes of me........
.......Gimme a chance dammit!! lol biggrin
Ok, im done!
Sorry if any one has mentioned this before but have you ever thought of getting a web cam!...................and in your Addy say that you will only except those that have one!
we use msn!...you can show a little pic of your self on there! and the others with out them collecting them!................and when you find your both interested then you can cam each other!
Just a thought!
better go now and Lay down!....Debbiwebs has had to use me little brain! redface
Debsxxxxxxx :rose:
hi debs,
yes we had a web cam,but had to get rid,cos my 15 yr old boy was doing some seriously 15 yr old boy things on it redface and with 3 yr old twins runnig around ,didnt want them corrupted at there tender age
Quote by wewantu2
hi debs,
yes we had a web cam,but had to get rid,cos my 15 yr old boy was doing some seriously 15 yr old boy things on it redface and with 3 yr old twins runnig around ,didnt want them corrupted at there tender age

Well the anwers to that is unplug it!.......and only use it when they are not there ok! wink :wink:
just us being very careful,still got the cam tho wink
I have spent a small fortune on AFF (silver member) and have never met up with any one. Any one i got chatting to either suddenly became male :shock: or were only on the site to make friends and chat confused:
Yesterday i had a plain member (couple) email me saying that if i replied within 10 minutes i could meet them and get it on.... I found it rather strange but emailed back and sent my pics. What made me laugh though was that they refused to provide one picture (even though i sent them mine) and accussed me of being a picture collector when i asked for one.... I don't know what people think, but there would be no chance of me turning up without a picture.... god knows what i might find :shock:
I have kind of given up on that site now, and hope to find some *real people* here!
Heh, the couple I met on Sunday through an ad on here wouldn't give me a picture of themselves! I had spoken to them a little on the phone. You takes your chances. Fortunately for me they turned out to be a cute couple, especially as I had to drive some 270 miles to get to them :shock: I was worried though that they seemed coy about giving me a photo. Not sure whether it was in case I was a collector, or whether they wanted to be able to check me out in person first without me being able to identify them.
Thats the problem.... Im happy to give my pics out (quite proud of em :P ) but it upsets me when others are not the same. I would not be too happy to drive 100 miles to find they both look like they have been attacked with sledge hammers.... I do have standards biggrin
Quote by wewantu2
hiya guys
we spent over a £100 on aff for a years gold membership,spoke to one really nice couple
met them,and lo and behold they were atleast 10 years older than there pics suggested,we beat a very hasty retreat bolt
and then decided we would try a club,at least at clubs there are no fakes and pic collectors,best thing we ever did lol

I've used AFF for over a year & find it to be very good. It has certainly been more successful for me than any other site, so have fun with it. That couple you met were taking a risk, & hopefully you told them where to go. Welcome to SH. :welcome:
Well if you found a real couple on that site let me know! - If you look at the most recent joined, you will notice that all are suddenly lesbians...... Some bloke has spend a hell of a long time putting fake listings on that site!
hi hungry p
our membership runs out in dec and we wont be renewing it,we find the club scene suits us fine,and hopefully will be going to a few munches on here,we really would like to meet all you guys and gals wink
Its the same old problem really with Aff..... There are real people looking for other real people and then there are people who exploit or take advantage of the situation....
I personally do not want to have large group sessions (to begin with) but it seems this is the only way to test the water since the real opportunities are getting harder and harder to find... (especially just women on their own)
hi special,we dont want the big group thing either,most clubs have private rooms etc,we also have a room booked at the club we go to ,so if you fancy retiring there all the better
just do what you feel comfortable with,everyone respects your bounderies,but wow watching the group sex is mindblowing rolleyes probably join in the next time we go 69position
Has anyone else ever noticed that these 'whingy' type threads are always started by people with the grey bar under their names ?
Quote by Silk and Big G
Has anyone else ever noticed that these 'whingy' type threads are always started by people with the grey bar under their names ?

so they're new, and asking you more experienced people for opinions, solutions, etc.
You had a grey bar once as well.
Quote by SpecialRic
Thats the problem.... Im happy to give my pics out (quite proud of em :P ) but it upsets me when others are not the same. I would not be too happy to drive 100 miles to find they both look like they have been attacked with sledge hammers.... I do have standards biggrin

I decided that as a single guy a risk had to be taken as us single guys generally have a bad rep (as time wasters and pic collectors). So in my case I accepted the risk of not seeing them before a long trip. A show of good faith as it were. This time it worked out and I met a great couple. I might not be so lucky next time smile
Thankyou to all so far for taking part, i think that i need to clarify somethings.
Firstly our experiences are as follows,
Reply to ads, no answer not even a no thanks, now that has nothing to do with the topic but if we spend the time to reply to your ads then surely good manners would dictate that you reply even when its a no? we ask for that but still havent had one reply saying no thanks!
Secondly, Why go through the whole picture swap, chat email etc then when asked for web cam or phone to verify leave never to return? (that is annoying and one of the reasons for the topic as well as being rude
Thirdly, If you are not prepared to give out a number why advertise yourself as wanting sex or meets with the people you advertise for? surely you wouldnt go to bed with someone you have never spoken to? ladies of the night talk to their customers before they do the do?!
So where are all the females who advertise for couples cause i havent had that many replies and when i have replied i never hear from them? what is that all about? I dont think im ugly,fat or abusive? these are the reasons i wouldnt talk to someone?
Jane 145346 x
Maybe we could start a little section on how to help us find fakers?
I just revealed one who'd messaged us.
Her - would i interest u????? (small pic attached, looked attractive enough, but kinda hard to tell)
me - maybe smile Can't really see much from the photo. Do you have a bigger one? Not
necessarily nude, just one where i can see your face. :) What ad are you replying to?
her - swingingheaven, yes do have more but need to see u 2
now, both our ads clearly state "PLEASE mention in your email that you're replying to the ad in *section*. Saves any confusion :)"
me - Did you read my ad in SH properly? I have two. Which one are you replying to? Tell me a bit more about yourself, if you don't want to send more pics.
her - i am bi and looking for a bi fem for fun, can be dom or sub, i do have more pics
me - So you're replying to the "women seeking women" ad then? Age? Location? Are you a member of the SH forum? Do you have a webcam/way to prove you are who you say you are? Can you send a bigger pic where i can see your face, please? The first
one is very small.
her - can send more after i have seen one of u
now, by this point, i'm pretty much sure that this is a faker. They've avoided my questions, clearly didn't even realy the ad properly, and don't seem particularly forthcoming in helping prove they are who they say they are. IMO, the onus is on the person making first contact to prove they are who they say they are. We're more than happy to go on webcam, at least to show our faces.
me - Answer my questions then, at least?
her - woman seeking woman, have my own man who has no idea, from edin
now, i'd already googled the email addy the person is emailing from. I google every email address i get, just to see what turns up. It returned two hits, and it appeats to be a MAN's email address, and in fact his contact address for work he does with a charity He's a regional coordinator. Called Bill.
me - age? can you prove you are who you say you are? Are you a member of
the SH forum? Do you have an ad on SH? If your man doesn't know, are you using your own email address, or his? :)
her - work email, dont bother, going to look elsewhere u obviously not interested
he knows the game's up now... :)
me - hahaha, you've been caught, bill. We're not stupid. We can spot fakers a mile away.

Now, this kinda thing happens several times a week. Literally 80% of any contact we make with people ends up with them either stopping replying, or me proving them to be a fake. We've met a few interesting people to chat to, cam with and possibly one day meet up with on this site and a few others, but more often than not, it ends like this.
Now, i'm the kinda guy who likes to argue. I love pissing people off and proving them wrong. I have to admit i kinda enjoy weeding out fakers like this, but just how many people are fooled by these guys?
I think we should definitely have a guide for people to help them weed out fakers. It's all simple stuff like googling the email address etc. Sure, that doesn't work all the time, but it's worth a shot.
G
hi gae
thanks for the tip m8 wink but like we said in our earlier posts,we got over our nerves and decided to join a club,and have never looked back,cos adds can be so frusrtating
cheers kiss
Just a suggestion. You may want to choose to have your e-mail address on your ad hidden. By hiding it - only registered users of the site can acess it. The way you have it now - anybody browsing the site can see your e-mail addy and e-mail you. Thatw ay you WILL get a lot of picture collectores - especially with pics like you already have on your ad.
Quote by gae
Has anyone else ever noticed that these 'whingy' type threads are always started by people with the grey bar under their names ?

so they're new, and asking you more experienced people for opinions, solutions, etc.
You had a grey bar once as well.
they didnt ask , they whinged
Quote by Rainbows
Just a suggestion. You may want to choose to have your e-mail address on your ad hidden. By hiding it - only registered users of the site can acess it. The way you have it now - anybody browsing the site can see your e-mail addy and e-mail you. Thatw ay you WILL get a lot of picture collectores - especially with pics like you already have on your ad.

We used to have our e-mail address hidden, but decided to make it visible after receiving a good percentage of replies saying that their pics were too big to fit within the 50K limit (and, to be honest, I got tired of responding to all of these with our e-mail address so they could send attachments). Sure, we get a few spams each week because of this, but it's been a lot more convenient for us. In fact, many respondents have been sending several pictures; whereas, in anonymous e-mail mode, you can only send one.
I guess Vix & I have been extraordinarily lucky with our meets. There are so many that we've met up with where no phone contact was made, just a handful of e-mails and photo exchanges back and forth with each other. And, so far, everyone's been exactly who they've claimed to be and no one's "stood us up". *touches wood* I've sometimes wondered, considering the photo exchanges, if some respondents might perceive us as being pic collectors, but that's just part of our introductory routine.
Quote by fruity1976
gender dyslexia

What an excellent turn of phrase! Goes right along with the sexual orientation dyslexia we sometimes encounter in our replies! lol
~Reese! surprised