Fisti-cuffs

27 Dec 2008

You won't ever stop it.
One persons dismissive/sneering/hurtful comment is another persons correct assessment of the original post. I to a point agree, if a belief is that heartfelt and held dear by the person posting it, why on earth would they give a shit what someone else thinks?
Post and be damned.
The AUP is there to prevent abuse, I'd suggest letting the mods apply it is probably the best way to go, that is of course if folks want a forum where you are allowed to disagree?
As for the keyboard warriors, are they that scary as to become worthy of you denying yourself the pleasure of meeting others?
confused

:

27 Dec 2008

Sorry cant do the quote thing but this is taken from a poster.
A still tounge I believe is someone that is not willing to learn, listen and question.
I disagree with this, I dont hardly post but I like to come and read the forums, it doesnt mean that Im not willing to learn or listen infact the its the opposite I have learnt more about people and facts on the forum just by just reading and listening wink

27 Dec 2008

Again quoted from someones post:
Forums are a venue for conversation, debate and the swapping of ideas and knowledge. They aren't there for people to hang back and not post anything. There's no point it being there if that's what people are going to do.
A swinging site is for swingers, but yet many have said in the past they have no intention of swinging but they like the site and likeminded people on it. So if people who sit back and watch the forums but dont post shouldnt be here then should that not go for the non swingers,,,,,after all it is a swinging site lol

27 Dec 2008

In reply to the OP, I've witnessed events unfurl that have lead to a member (of another forum, I hasten to add) being stabbed at a public event.
It's disgusting and unacceptable that people will resort to any level of violence, but some (and seeming, increasingly more of the populous) will. sad

As for not attending events for fear of this, I for one refuse to let others dictate either directly or indirectly what I can and cannot do with my personal time and that's in real life too, not just on forums.
That's just me and I'm an individual, like everyone else on this site. I have my own ideas, preconceptions, misconceptions and opinions. If I feel I have a valid point I will state it. If I feel I have a point, but it's not that important I'll think about posting or not and depending on how I feel at the time, I may choose not to post, but instead to sit back and watch the thread. It is always my choice though.
Of course I have my own personality traits, others will be different and there's no reason why I can't at least try to understand someone else opinions, even if I don't agree with them.
Ce La Vive.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by easy
It's disgusting and unacceptable that people will resort to any level of violence, but some (and seeming, increasingly more of the populous) will.
As for not attending events for fear of this, I for one refuse to let others dictate either directly or indirectly what I can and cannot do with my personal time and that's in real life too, not just on forums.

I should just clarify that I did not avoid the munch I was referring to because of the threat of violence. It was just that I really did not want to be in the same room as someone I find so objectionable on here.
The earlier point that electing not to post an opinion renders it valueless is in my view facile. A lot of people may very well want to express an opinion, which is perfectly valid, but just don't want some sort or pedantic, forensic dissection of it which then leads to an abusive confrontation. This has happened increasingly on here lately.
.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Cherrytree

Personally, I think if someone is put off posting because their comment will be disagreed with then their opinion isn't worth listening to. After all if they don't think it's important enough to post then why should we think it's important enough to care about missing it?
An opinion that isn't backed up by deep-felt belief isn't worth having as far as I'm concerned.

Peanut I agree with most of what you have said earlier on this thread, but I disagree with all of the above post.
Agreement or disagreement wasn't expected. I'm merely stating what I think.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by foxylady2209

Personally, I think if someone is put off posting because their comment will be disagreed with then their opinion isn't worth listening to. After all if they don't think it's important enough to post then why should we think it's important enough to care about missing it?
An opinion that isn't backed up by deep-felt belief isn't worth having as far as I'm concerned.

I disagree totally with that, Peanut.

Fair enough. That's probably why I wrote it and you didn't.

I believe that people may not be put off cos they doubt the value of what they post. They may well be put off posting because they expect to be abused for voicing their opinion. People are being very effectively bullied out of posting on here by fear of unwarranted and hurtful reactions by other people.

I'm sorry but I have no sympathy. We don't go through life being wrapped in cotton wool, why should that change once they come on here?

People who I hope would think twice about voicing their sneering/hurtful/dismissive comments if they were face to face with their target.

If that was aimed at me, then I'm sorry but people who know me know that I'm not a keyboard commando. There is just as much chance of me saying what I say to their face as there is of me writing it here.
The one thing that's different is that I supply the facial expressions and body language that puts my comments into the correct context.

An opinion may be supported by heartfelt beliefs, but the person holding that opinion can be abused into holding their tongue.

That's their problem, not mine. If they don't have the courage of their convictions then they can feel free to sit in the corner with their box of tissues.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by TabbynTina
Again quoted from someones post:
Forums are a venue for conversation, debate and the swapping of ideas and knowledge. They aren't there for people to hang back and not post anything. There's no point it being there if that's what people are going to do.
A swinging site is for swingers, but yet many have said in the past they have no intention of swinging but they like the site and likeminded people on it. So if people who sit back and watch the forums but dont post shouldnt be here then should that not go for the non swingers,,,,,after all it is a swinging site

Perhaps I should remind you of this...
"General discussion and chit-chat. Post anything here that is NOT a Meet Up or about Dogging. Use the sections below for those."
The Cafe is NOT about swinging, which in turn means that what you said in the last paragraph above is pretty much null & void.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by westerross

It's disgusting and unacceptable that people will resort to any level of violence, but some (and seeming, increasingly more of the populous) will.
As for not attending events for fear of this, I for one refuse to let others dictate either directly or indirectly what I can and cannot do with my personal time and that's in real life too, not just on forums.

I should just clarify that I did not avoid the munch I was referring to because of the threat of violence. It was just that I really did not want to be in the same room as someone I find so objectionable on here.

Your loss, their gain then. Simple as that.

The earlier point that electing not to post an opinion renders it valueless is in my view facile. A lot of people may very well want to express an opinion, which is perfectly valid, but just don't want some sort or pedantic, forensic dissection of it which then leads to an abusive confrontation. This has happened increasingly on here lately.
.

An opinion left unstated is about as useful as a chocolate teapot and may as well not exist for all the difference it will make to anything or anyone.
I've seen that accusation of "dissection" levelled before and frankly I believe it is total bollocks. Any element of a discussion, debate or opinion is fair game for commenting on. If people don't go to the trouble of caring what words they use then it's tough shit if someone picks up on it.
For a website that's supposed to be adults only there does seem to be an awful lot of cry babies here. FFS you're adults, try acting like it and stop whinging and whining like someone in the playground. "Mum, that man called me names because I posted something".
So long as what is said is within the AUP then there's nothing to complain about. If people are too sensitive to take some criticism then they really shouldn't be on the net, much less trying to join in adult debate. rolleyes

27 Dec 2008

D'ya know what ??
I've just typed a reply to this and previewed before hitting submit and decided not to post it because it will only start yet another row....
And I just cant be arsed any more rolleyes

27 Dec 2008

Peanut
Your an arse!!
My opinion
and I dont post very often, but I have beleif in my opinion
Jane x
sits and waits for back lash - may not post again for a while

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Djcouple7
Peanut
Your an arse!!
My opinion
and I dont post very often, but I have beleif in my opinion
Jane x
sits and waits for back lash - may not post again for a while

That should be "you're".
BTW, just a tip, try reading the AUP before you post another of your 'opinions'.
There's a good girl.

27 Dec 2008

My most sincere apologies

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Djcouple7
Peanut
Your an arse!!
My opinion
and I dont post very often, but I have beleif in my opinion
Jane x
sits and waits for back lash - may not post again for a while

these are the kind of posts that piss me off...you insult another member but you don't back it up with why you think he is an arse?
just staight in..."your an arse!"
then straight out with no explanation why?
the thing with Peanut...he says it how it is!!
he doesn't do fluffy wuffy!

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Djcouple7
Peanut
Your an arse!!
My opinion
and I dont post very often, but I have beleif in my opinion
Jane x
sits and waits for back lash - may not post again for a while

DJ
I fear you have incomming inane comments on the way

27 Dec 2008

Quote by medic_1
Peanut
Your an arse!!
My opinion
and I dont post very often, but I have beleif in my opinion
Jane x
sits and waits for back lash - may not post again for a while

DJ
I fear you have incomming inane comments on the way
Ooh look, Phredd posted one just for starters.

27 Dec 2008

I know Medic redface

, sort of expected but was too late withe the delete button hence the reason I dont post very often.
Jane

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Djcouple7
My most sincere apologies

Why?
If you genuinely think I'm an arse then why apologise?
It hasn't hurt my feelings, it won't make any difference to your opinion about me.
My mention of the AUP was for your benefit, not mine. It's not that I'm going to be worried that someone I don't know and will never meet thinks I'm an arse.

27 Dec 2008

too pished to correct my spelling mistakes so i thought to apologise for you having to bring it to my attention

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Djcouple7
too pished to correct my spelling mistakes so i thought to apologise for you having to bring it to my attention

All part of the job of being an arse.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Peanut

It's disgusting and unacceptable that people will resort to any level of violence, but some (and seeming, increasingly more of the populous) will.
As for not attending events for fear of this, I for one refuse to let others dictate either directly or indirectly what I can and cannot do with my personal time and that's in real life too, not just on forums.

I should just clarify that I did not avoid the munch I was referring to because of the threat of violence. It was just that I really did not want to be in the same room as someone I find so objectionable on here.

Your loss, their gain then. Simple as that.

The earlier point that electing not to post an opinion renders it valueless is in my view facile. A lot of people may very well want to express an opinion, which is perfectly valid, but just don't want some sort or pedantic, forensic dissection of it which then leads to an abusive confrontation. This has happened increasingly on here lately.
.

An opinion left unstated is about as useful as a chocolate teapot and may as well not exist for all the difference it will make to anything or anyone.
I've seen that accusation of "dissection" levelled before and frankly I believe it is total bollocks. Any element of a discussion, debate or opinion is fair game for commenting on. If people don't go to the trouble of caring what words they use then it's tough shit if someone picks up on it.
For a website that's supposed to be adults only there does seem to be an awful lot of cry babies here. FFS you're adults, try acting like it and stop whinging and whining like someone in the playground. "Mum, that man called me names because I posted something".
So long as what is said is within the AUP then there's nothing to complain about. If people are too sensitive to take some criticism then they really shouldn't be on the net, much less trying to join in adult debate. rolleyes

:thumbup:
I guess that makes me an arse as well? dunno

:shock:

27 Dec 2008

To two lovely little arses! :rascal:
Happy Christmas
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

27 Dec 2008

Quote by blonde
To two lovely little arses! :rascal:
Happy Christmas
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Love it

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Dave__Notts
Who has the right to threaten, imlpy, state, etc that they will take things further if they were to meet on a public forum.
I have seen this happen at a munch twice before and it was not a good sight to see at an event that was supposed to be fun. Now we do not put our names down for socials or munches where these people are going. Now it looks like we will have to start adding names from forum posts as well
Dave_Notts

Just going back to the original post for a sec.
No-one has the right to threaten another person in any way shape or form but sadly it happens in all walks of life from school right up until the nursing home if my Mum's stories are to be believed (she is a carer not a resident).
I agree Dave that it can be awkward if you have to meet someone you have issues with at a social or a munch and I'm not saying I would relish the thought of being in that situation myself. I would weigh it up with how many folk were going to be there that I did want to see and make my decision based on that.
I don't take kindly to threats. It's mainly Bullies that make threats and in my opinion if you take their threats seriously you are letting them win.

27 Dec 2008

Quote by blonde
To two lovely little arses! :rascal:
Happy Christmas
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Very flattering, but I don't think my arse has been little, let alone lovely, for a good 30 years rolleyes

27 Dec 2008

Quote by blonde
To two lovely little arses! :rascal:
Happy Christmas
Sam xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

I shall take that as a compliment, cos mrs777 says I have a lovely little arse too. :shock: lol

xx

27 Dec 2008

this, in the end is a forum. To chat, give your opinions & to flirt :rascal: Can we just flirt instead of pickering about silly stuff at Xmas confused

:
In edit DJ gorgous avator wink

27 Dec 2008

Quote by Peanuts
their opinion isn't worth listening to.

I fart on your opinion......... rolleyes

27 Dec 2008

Quote by markz

their opinion isn't worth listening to.

I fart on your opinion......... rolleyes

Hopefully you'll either be wearing a spacesuit and/or driving a Volkswagen Beetle when you do. :roll:

27 Dec 2008

I meant it as a compliment, if I hadn't, I would have said .......... something like .............
To the 2 fuckwits ....:rascal:
bugger off
Sam :giggle: xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx