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Friends and Groups why and how meny?

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can someone please explain the fasination of having to add hundreds of friends to their profile and tens of groups.
we really cant see the point in adding "friends" who are hundreds of miles aways and lets face it the chances of actually meeting are remote in the least, it also begs the question as to why invite or add friends whom you may never meet.
we also really cant see the point of joining tens of groups whos interestes range from extreem to extreem.
the most we have seen is "a current member" with nearly 1000 friends and they have also joined to most of the groups here as well!!!
perhaps were missing somthing.
perhaps the site should have a leader board for the following
most friends on a profile.
most groups joined by a single profile.
most forum posts by a single profile.
most photos/albums in a profile.
I do have friends on here i have 80something and they really are friends who i have been away on hol with, who have been to my parties, who come for coffee in the day and i have to say all bar 3 of them now I could never ever have sex with as they really are friends!
Have no idea why people join groups they make no sense to me at all i have to say, i accepted an invite a while back to see if i could work it out but no better off by knowing lol
Quote by karrob
can someone please explain the fasination of having to add hundreds of friends to their profile and tens of groups.
we really cant see the point in adding "friends" who are hundreds of miles aways and lets face it the chances of actually meeting are remote in the least, it also begs the question as to why invite or add friends whom you may never meet.
we also really cant see the point of joining tens of groups whos interestes range from extreem to extreem.
the most we have seen is "a current member" with nearly 1000 friends and they have also joined to most of the groups here as well!!!
perhaps were missing somthing.
perhaps the site should have a leader board for the following
most friends on a profile.
most groups joined by a single profile.
most forum posts by a single profile.
most photos/albums in a profile.

Why should anyone explain their reasons for having friends/being in groups to you? Perhaps you should allow people the freedom to join groups/make friends as they wish, without question - it's not hurting anyone, after all confused
I signed up for a number of groups, but months later took myself off them. they are unecessary. I don't think anyone has found them to be of any use at all. just another redundant IT exercise, designed to give some temporary focus and direction to newcomers and those at a loose end.
I've got a group that I've never been able to get into! :giggle:
I formed my own group for a while. I was actually quite successful.
Why should anyone explain their reasons for having friends/being in groups to you? Perhaps you should allow people the freedom to join groups/make friends as they wish, without question - it's not hurting anyone, after all confused
didnt ask fo their explinations at all, just an observation and an interest.
nothing to do with us allowing them the freedom to do so either and agree its defo not hurting anyone.
wow we see you are leading the forum posts is that really over seventeen thousand, were impressed. wink biggrin bet it wont be long till the 20K is reached lol.
Quote by karrob
Why should anyone explain their reasons for having friends/being in groups to you? Perhaps you should allow people the freedom to join groups/make friends as they wish, without question - it's not hurting anyone, after all confused

didnt ask fo their explinations at all, just an observation and an interest.
nothing to do with us allowing them the freedom to do so either and agree its defo not hurting anyone.
wow we see you are leading the forum posts is that really over seventeen thousand, were impressed. wink biggrin bet it wont be long till the 20K is reached lol.
Hmmm...
Quote by karrob
can someone please explain the fasination of having to add hundreds of friends to their profile and tens of groups.
we really cant see the point in adding "friends" who are hundreds of miles aways and lets face it the chances of actually meeting are remote in the least, it also begs the question as to why invite or add friends whom you may never meet.
we also really cant see the point of joining tens of groups whos interestes range from extreem to extreem.
the most we have seen is "a current member" with nearly 1000 friends and they have also joined to most of the groups here as well!!!
perhaps were missing somthing.
perhaps the site should have a leader board for the following
most friends on a profile.
most groups joined by a single profile.
most forum posts by a single profile.
most photos/albums in a profile.

And I'm not leading the forum posts - I think that's Dawnie!
Quote by Freckledbird
can someone please explain the fasination of having to add hundreds of friends to their profile and tens of groups.
we really cant see the point in adding "friends" who are hundreds of miles aways and lets face it the chances of actually meeting are remote in the least, it also begs the question as to why invite or add friends whom you may never meet.
we also really cant see the point of joining tens of groups whos interestes range from extreem to extreem.
the most we have seen is "a current member" with nearly 1000 friends and they have also joined to most of the groups here as well!!!
perhaps were missing somthing.
perhaps the site should have a leader board for the following
most friends on a profile.
most groups joined by a single profile.
most forum posts by a single profile.
most photos/albums in a profile.

Why should anyone explain their reasons for having friends/being in groups to you? Perhaps you should allow people the freedom to join groups/make friends as they wish, without question - it's not hurting anyone, after all confused
dunno I am quite happy to answer it seems others are too.
Dont have lots of friends and only joined two groups. Found the groups useless mostly inhabited by single men and made by single men but I imagine great if your after single men. Normally when we get a friend request it means they are never going to answer the message we sent them :-|
The word reason wasn't actually used in the op first posting, so its arguable if that should be the line of inquiry.
I don't have any friends...you all hate me ......bastards....it's not fair .....I hate you all anyway so there
O.K. so I now have one ironic friend .........bloody piss takers
i only have one "friend" here and thats gary, my partner
i ignore/delete any requests i get to be "friends"
im certainly not friends, in the normal sense of the word, with anyone on this site other than gary anyway so dont feel the need to have a list of friends
i think im in one group and i know iv been in a few others in the past but iv never seen the point of them and not really sure what they are here for
i dont care and dont know how many posts iv made in the forums
cant rember the rest of the questions so il stop there lol
Quote by Kaznkev
O.K. so I now have one ironic friend .........bloody piss takers

How do you know it was ironic,they may have been impressed by your wit and ability to ignore provocotive sexual behaviour, wink
I never ignore provocative sexual behaviour.......I just struggle to believe it's me that's supposed to be provoked......and it's funnier to pretend nothing's happening
We have 26 friends, but only 11 are real friends and we are members of lots of groups but only two are we active in, why? dunno Because we can wink
I have friends on here that are 100's of miles away, because I like to interact with people, but don't like having to go hunting through the search facility to find them so I can send them a message. Especially when there's a way that works very well for me.
Some members like to add ops/mods to their friends lists for similar reasons.
Quote by Staggerlee_BB
O.K. so I now have one ironic friend .........bloody piss takers

Remember we used to have a 'PM a forumite' week, well I'm getting an idea for a variation on that. :giggle:
bolt
As I understand it, additional functionality gets added to the site when a lot of people ask for it. Plus, one of SH's main aspirations is to get all the swinging resources it's members might need in one place.
Many SH members use Facebook to keep in touch with their swinging friends but they usually have to open a second account to keep it hidden from their vanilla friends. The SH version gives them something similar, but in a more private swinging-focused manner.
It's the same thing for groups: People go to other sites to set up groups related to their swinging activities, so SH is trying to save them the hassle of having multiple accounts with different providers by letting them run their own groups here.
At the end of the day it's like a lot of the ancillary functionality available on SH: If you like it, use it! If you don't, don't.
:thumbup:
And I'm not leading the forum posts - I think that's Dawnie!
wow were even more impressed over 20600 posts now that is some going lol, but ya a close second eh lol.
Quote by karrob
And I'm not leading the forum posts - I think that's Dawnie!
wow were even more impressed over 20600 posts now that is some going lol, but ya a close second eh lol.

women always have lots to say.................rolleyes
I think that on some other sites, if you accept someone as a friend it means they get to see your photos. Sometimes I think that may be why members on here (particularly new members) send out friend requests to folk whose profiles or adverts they may have been checking out.
I don't think it's a bad thing to have lots of friends or be in lots of groups. If that's the way you use the site, that's cool.
I have lots of people in my favourites list - but that's a whole different story wink
Quote by noladreams
I think that on some other sites, if you accept someone as a friend it means they get to see your photos. Sometimes I think that may be why members on here (particularly new members) send out friend requests to folk whose profiles or adverts they may have been checking out.

Thanks Nola you've just explained part of the confusion between " Friends" and "Favourites". Currently the both seem to be the same thing, except with one you send an invite, but not clear why. Perhaps we should adopt this idea which is used on most other sites?
Quote by Cubes
It's the same thing for groups: People go to other sites to set up groups related to their swinging activities, so SH is trying to save them the hassle of having multiple accounts with different providers by letting them run their own groups here.
At the end of the day it's like a lot of the ancillary functionality available on SH: If you like it, use it! If you don't, don't.

A well made point Cubes however most members are not clear this is the case. And this highlights one of the many problems particularly with the new site. However there are many good new ideas on the site but, as seems to happen more frequently these days, many are poorly implemented, inconsistent or both.
As a case in point the groups section is a good idea, not only for the reasons you've given but as an idea in it's own right. However currently it is a barren wilderness with very little activity. Why? Well most people, including myself, forget it's there, forget which groups one belongs to, and don't know what's happening in any of them, short of going through each one on a regular basis.
So here's a simple idea. Why not take the same idea used in the "Mail" section of the "My Account" panel? Why not have a "red" square with a number indicating the number of posts from ALL of your groups. Then when your select "Groups" your list of groups, on the following page, will have the same "red" square with a relevant number, indicating the number of posts for that particular group next to it.
This will provide much more relevant information and also remind people of activity within the group, and perhaps also indicate which groups are active or not.
*lover*
Quote by bbw_loverNkitty
As a case in point the groups section is a good idea, not only for the reasons you've given but as an idea in it's own right. However currently it is a barren wilderness with very little activity. Why? Well most people, including myself, forget it's there, forget which groups one belongs to, and don't know what's happening in any of them, short of going through each one on a regular basis.
So here's a simple idea. Why not take the same idea used in the "Mail" section of the "My Account" panel? Why not have a "red" square with a number indicating the number of posts from ALL of your groups. Then when your select "Groups" your list of groups, on the following page, will have the same "red" square with a relevant number, indicating the number of posts for that particular group next to it.
This will provide much more relevant information and also remind people of activity within the group, and perhaps also indicate which groups are active or not.
*lover*

I think that's a great idea! :thumbup:
To be honest this is one of the best ways to get the site improved - by it's members telling the Admin team what they want to see.
If you (or anyone else) sees something that's glaringly obvious by it's absence, or if there's something that doesn't work the way you think it should, please go ahead and open a support ticket to Admin and suggest it. That way the idea doesn't get lost in all the other stuff in the forums, and you know it'll get reviewed by the right people. It also means some other crafty bugger doesn't nick your idea! ;-)
Quote by bbw_loverNkitty
I think that on some other sites, if you accept someone as a friend it means they get to see your photos. Sometimes I think that may be why members on here (particularly new members) send out friend requests to folk whose profiles or adverts they may have been checking out.

Thanks Nola you've just explained part of the confusion between " Friends" and "Favourites". Currently the both seem to be the same thing, except with one you send an invite, but not clear why. Perhaps we should adopt this idea which is used on most other sites?

But remember, that friend on here cannot see you private pics unless you specifically send them an invite.
Personally, I use my friend list for people I chat to regularly, and who I send pm's. Often they are people who I have met at socials, and who, in a real life situation, I would consider them to be a friend. My favourites are the ones where I just think they are very scrummy and like perving their profiles :twisted:
The major difference is that you dont need permission of the person to add them to your favourites list (therefore, perv privately), but friends have to agree they are your friend, like with facebook.
bump?
Quote by Firestorm_09
bump?

nice to see it return!
Quote by karrob
bump?

nice to see it return!
It really didn't go anywhere - was a very small glitch in the system earlier when posts were made on the forum. It was corrected pretty quick.
Ah, there you are, I have been hunting high and low, trouble is you dont write you dont phone......
Quote by Naughty Wigan Couple
But remember, that friend on here cannot see you private pics unless you specifically send them an invite.
Personally, I use my friend list for people I chat to regularly, and who I send pm's. Often they are people who I have met at socials, and who, in a real life situation, I would consider them to be a friend. My favourites are the ones where I just think they are very scrummy and like perving their profiles :twisted:
The major difference is that you dont need permission of the person to add them to your favourites list (therefore, perv privately), but friends have to agree they are your friend, like with facebook.

rotflmao So I'm not the only one with a favourites list full of hot men then?! :rascal:
I think that people presume being friends means more access to pics - at least that is the only reason I can think for sending random friends requests.
Hmmm... off to 're-visit' my favourites! wink
I use the Friends function to track where my friends are - there's so much social media, so I use the Friends button to find out who's online for a chat, and who's not. If no-on's online, I move on...
The groups function isn't working that well - the suggestion above about knowing when posts have been added to a group is excellent.