Ha Haaa !! Lady WC, oops WA!!! Nice to see you've finally made it. Been busy puting your face on ? Oh, I see you've sharpened your claws!!!! Well be a love and go and get us some beers. Don't forget to take the tops off. When you've done that I believe there are some cleaning bits and bobs over there in that cupboard.I think that's where Alex keeps them. Now don't stand there with your mouth open. Run along. Chop chop.
So, who's for a game of cards??
Sgt Bilko
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GFZ - Sarge, Hughies, and Ralphs
Quote by Wilma10 minutes, that would be a short snog, 3 tweaks of the nipples, one nipple suck (right or left as preferred), a hint of a tongue on the clitoris, and one shag consisting of: 15 long slow strokes, 7 short fast strokes, 3 fast and furious and one vinegar stroke, followed by a grunt of thanks and an insincere I will call you sometime next week
I got 10 minutes before bedtime...let's see what unfolds!!!!
let me know if you get a better offer hun .....
lhk
Kat
Artificer,
The only smell when I arrived was my sexy perfume, but then knowing I was about to enter a so called GFZ I had over done the said delicate nose in order that I should not be affronted by any less than desireable diffusions.
I have to say that even my open minded and live and let live approach was sorely reproached by the clinch I caught Sarge and Brumlad in. Nevertheless, I was prepared to play ball ( or should that be with their balls ) yet my presence meerly scared them and like umpteen members of the so called GFZ they ran away.
However, your offer to check the sheep, though enticing, is far below what a lady undertakes, though Im not averse to the odd shepherd in the barn!
Any way have to go, keeping my date waiting now, well I say date, I mean meet, wellI say meet I mean shag, which is more than the members of the GFZ are going to get tonight!!
LadyWA
xxxx
The only smell when I arrived was my sexy perfume, but then knowing I was about to enter a so called GFZ I had over done the said delicate nose in order that I should not be affronted by any less than desireable diffusions.
I have to say that even my open minded and live and let live approach was sorely reproached by the clinch I caught Sarge and Brumlad in. Nevertheless, I was prepared to play ball ( or should that be with their balls ) yet my presence meerly scared them and like umpteen members of the so called GFZ they ran away.
However, your offer to check the sheep, though enticing, is far below what a lady undertakes, though Im not averse to the odd shepherd in the barn!
Any way have to go, keeping my date waiting now, well I say date, I mean meet, wellI say meet I mean shag, which is more than the members of the GFZ are going to get tonight!!
LadyWA
xxxx
Quote by brumlad
right, deal the cards sarge. what we playing ?
Going to have to go out and drag misschief in here to serve the drinks at this rate, might even have to club her over the head to get her in here !
question is guys, what should lady wa be wearing as her uniform in here ?
Oh, I don't know..Italian designer dress, long 'Holly Golightly' gloves, diamond earrings, tiara, stillettos (shoes-not knife!),-in other words, she can dress down a bit..
Whats that you say, Sarge, wearing dusters on her knuckles ? I guess it makes it easier to clean things !
Fashion eh - I can never keep up !
{Carpathian looks around the room , see's how deserted it is and goes back to writing, muttering under his breath}
"Theres enough material in this place to keep me going for ages......."
Fashion eh - I can never keep up !
{Carpathian looks around the room , see's how deserted it is and goes back to writing, muttering under his breath}
"Theres enough material in this place to keep me going for ages......."
Quote by LadyWA
However, your offer to check the sheep, though enticing, is far below what a lady undertakes, though Im not averse to the odd shepherd in the barn!
LadyWA
xxxx
By the juice in me granny's blackberries, I'm changing my mind about this girl. She's a real 'umman! Let me tell you, my Lady, I am the oddest of shepherds, and my barn is big enough for a rugby team to honeymoon in. Yes, we shepherds are all odd (our local 'Leisure Centre' consists of a sheep tied to a lamp-post!). Just remember, when you are on your date , in the big city, with all the money and toffs, and MPs: after he's 'lost his deposit': there's a starry sky and acres of rustic stirrings waiting here. remember: 'When the going gets tough, try a bit of rough'. You won't have to do all that social graces rubbish: just give the bull a clear run!
Quote by Sgt Bilko
Tries peeping over Carpathian's shoulder to see what he's scribbling in his notebook
Whats that Sarge ? Oh fair enough - let me know if you change your mind. Thats the great thing about virtual wine bottles in here - always seem to have enough left to have another glass to pour.......
{Carpathian spots Sarge's reflection in the one shiny place in the GFZ and quietly folds the notepad and puts it away}
No, no, no Arty. Don't do it!!!! You are only one step away from turning into Will. You will be throwing rose petals at her feet soon and serving drinks in the BFZ.
Carpy, Brumlad grab hold of him. We can lay him on the sofa and sit on him until these urges of his go away. He will thank us for it one day!!!!
Sgt Bilko
Carpy, Brumlad grab hold of him. We can lay him on the sofa and sit on him until these urges of his go away. He will thank us for it one day!!!!
Sgt Bilko
Quote by Sgt Bilko
No, no, no Arty. Don't do it!!!! You are only one step away from turning into Will. You will be throwing rose petals at her feet soon and serving drinks in the BFZ.
Carpy, Brumlad grab hold of him. We can lay him on the sofa and sit on him until these urges of his go away. He will thank us for it one day!!!!
Sgt Bilko
Oh, but Sarge, she pronounces her 'h's, and has a bath EVERY week! And she 's got a horse, and JODHPURS and black riding boots (and a WHIP!!) and can talk with two plums in her mouth!! No Sarge, she's got me sap rising! She even listens to Radio Four-and, now mark this Sarge-she puts her tea in BEFORE the milk. What can a simple country lad do? She's even got one of those little toilets for washing your feet in...well, I think that's what it's for. But!!-wait for it Sarge-she's been to....LONDON!! Pwoar! I'm going to polish up me brogues and brasso me belt buckle: could be 'tea at the Ritz' for me Butty!
:lol: Oh Arty, you'll be telling me next she doesn't drink her tea out of the saucer and that she has been in an aeroplane!!!!
Don't do it, it will end in tears and I get the feeling they won't be hers. Just stick to the simple things in life, like your ferrets. That reminds me, where are your ferrets??. Misschief!!! MISSCHIEF!!!!!!
Sgt Bilko
Don't do it, it will end in tears and I get the feeling they won't be hers. Just stick to the simple things in life, like your ferrets. That reminds me, where are your ferrets??. Misschief!!! MISSCHIEF!!!!!!
Sgt Bilko
*Fred saunters in - checks his flies - realises he has not got his trousers on and begins to wonder where he left them*
Evening all! Just finished getting ready for going away - sorted out the route and pninted it in big bold type for Wilma - you know what these girlies are at navigating.....
Nice smell in here - better than the old peach air freshner we have had for weeks
Do my eyes deceive me or is the top of that pizza jumping?
Fleas? Eh? Oh I see - so long as it is nothing seriously wrong with it I'll have a slice Brumlad.
Has anyone told Misschief that what looks like an old fur rug is shagging her leg?
What is this stuff all over the remote - euuuuwwwwwwwwww! Givve that a wipe will you misschief? - No, on yer fur rug will do. What - The fur rug is leaking?
Pong of a posh bird in here somewhere - after a bit of rough was she? Blimey - you smell a bit strong sarge - did you fancy your chances with her then.......
Did you notice she rustles when she walks? - I thought it was because she was a real toff - turns out she has tied a couple of paper bags to the inside of her knees to make her sound like one - I only know cos she came out the bog with her skirt tucked into her knickers!
Right - couple of cases of beer here - bout time you handed me a cold one with the top off misschief....
Don't worry about next weekend Jags, nobody will care anyway and you will be far too busy to clean up until sunday evening..
Right - oooutch up on the sofa Carpathian I need to take the weight off - BTW nice to see you - what is that notebook for?
FFS misschief - I said top off of the beer....
*opens beer bottle on edge of coffee table and reminds himself not to sit on the table because there seems to be splinters all round the edge - leans to one side and farts*
ARTI - is that those puffin ferrets I can smell?.......
Evening all! Just finished getting ready for going away - sorted out the route and pninted it in big bold type for Wilma - you know what these girlies are at navigating.....
Nice smell in here - better than the old peach air freshner we have had for weeks
Do my eyes deceive me or is the top of that pizza jumping?
Fleas? Eh? Oh I see - so long as it is nothing seriously wrong with it I'll have a slice Brumlad.
Has anyone told Misschief that what looks like an old fur rug is shagging her leg?
What is this stuff all over the remote - euuuuwwwwwwwwww! Givve that a wipe will you misschief? - No, on yer fur rug will do. What - The fur rug is leaking?
Pong of a posh bird in here somewhere - after a bit of rough was she? Blimey - you smell a bit strong sarge - did you fancy your chances with her then.......
Did you notice she rustles when she walks? - I thought it was because she was a real toff - turns out she has tied a couple of paper bags to the inside of her knees to make her sound like one - I only know cos she came out the bog with her skirt tucked into her knickers!
Right - couple of cases of beer here - bout time you handed me a cold one with the top off misschief....
Don't worry about next weekend Jags, nobody will care anyway and you will be far too busy to clean up until sunday evening..
Right - oooutch up on the sofa Carpathian I need to take the weight off - BTW nice to see you - what is that notebook for?
FFS misschief - I said top off of the beer....
*opens beer bottle on edge of coffee table and reminds himself not to sit on the table because there seems to be splinters all round the edge - leans to one side and farts*
ARTI - is that those puffin ferrets I can smell?.......
unlatches wet furry thing from leg and leaps up on sofa, tucking legs under her to keep it away!
Thanks for your help there Carpathian, Sarge!!!! Now I havent got a drink, can you get me one please :wary:
Sarge!!! grrrr my bikini line might look a tad fuzzy after a few days but it doesn't look or stink like that bluddy creature there!
Thanks for your help there Carpathian, Sarge!!!! Now I havent got a drink, can you get me one please :wary:
Sarge!!! grrrr my bikini line might look a tad fuzzy after a few days but it doesn't look or stink like that bluddy creature there!
Quote by Sgt Bilko
A nice glass of Cabernet suit you ?
Carpy, now YOU'RE turning into Will!!!
Don't knock a good wine Sarge - this stuff is glorious ! May not have lagers bubbles or the head of a good Guinness but it's does the trick fine on nights like this.
{Carpathian finally gets round to actually pouring Misschief her drink)
Quote by MISSCHIEF
unlatches wet furry thing from leg and leaps up on sofa, tucking legs under her to keep it away!
Thanks for your help there Carpathian, Sarge!!!! Now I havent got a drink, can you get me one please :wary:
Sarge!!! grrrr my bikini line might look a tad fuzzy after a few days but it doesn't look or stink like that bluddy creature there!
Misschief! My love. If it weren't for the fact I think you are as lovely as a sunny day, I could get cross. Old Fly might pong a bit, and have a bit of a fetish about women's legs -(has it rubbed off to his master?)-but he is a WONDEROUS old dog. D'y'know, that old chap penned the wild Speckles at Builth Wells, went on 'One Man and His Dog'-twice-and sired 134 pups! By St Winifred, he's got more brains than a lorry load of pigs' heads!!
But, he does pong, so I'll 'tek 'im whum' (take him home to you refined people). Here Fly!!shrill whistle come on lad, let's go home and talk about that 'Lady' woman Goodnight good mates, see you all tomorrow. Goodnight
Art
Shit, where are the Ferrets...Fred! Jill! Anybody seen two ferrets? Misschief-do you always have those bulges in your dress?...FRED!!!
