It started off as a normal afternoon. I left the Guardroom at the entrance to Swinging Heaven and decided to carry out one of my regular Security Patrols of the Site.
First stop, the car park, to check that I had locked the tank up and put the Crooklock on. Checked that no-one had nicked my fluffy dice or my nodding dog. No problem there then, so it was off to the GFZ to check that none of those pesky girls have been tampering with the locks or spraying air freshener through the letter box. I have no idea why we have a letter box because we have never received a letter since the day it opened. The only time it came in handy was when we passed bottles of beer through it to Kit when he locked himself in there, to escape the slapping he was due from Kit!!!
:? :?Next stop, the lost property office. What do you mean you didn’t know we had one???
There’s a big box of dummies that have been spat out in the Forum and the owners have never come back to claim them.
:evil: There’s another box marked “Sense of Humourâ€. There’s been plenty of those lost in the Forum over the last 12 months.
:lol: :lol: :lol: Then there’s the sanity box. If I take the top off and peep inside I can see DaveJ’s and Misschief’s sanity running round in circles!!! :shock: :shock: :shock:
Then there’s the items of clothing that have been lost. Rogers white underpants, Judy’s pink knickers, Wilma’s fluffy pink hand-cuffs, Misschief’s cardigan that she enjoys licking every now and then, and ……………..FFS!! That’s where my best helmet went to! :P :P
So, all is well there - next stop, the Chatroom. I pop my head in, shout hello to Steve G, Tigger and Tongue, then on with the security patrol. I pass the Flintstone’s Cave and give them a wave as I see Wilma, through the window, swinging around in the bedroom and hear Fred shouting Yabbadabbadoooo!!
:wink: :wink:Right next door, Jags is proudly checking her collection of cock pics. And practicing her slapping technique!! :shock: :shock: :shock:
Anyway, this doesn’t explain my present predicament does it? The last place on my patrol is the BFZ. I usually pop by there just to check that the dust isn’t reaching dangerous levels. Sometimes Alex pops in and gives it the once over, but I think she has been slacking recently.
:roll: :roll:So as I wander round checking that the windows are secure and unplugging ….. Well, you don’t want to know what those girls leave plugged in, I suddenly feel something tighten around my ankle and then I am whisked into the air, feet first, like a backward bungee jump. :? :? :shock: :shock:
I’ve only gone and stood in one of WBB’s mantraps!!! I have been dangling upside down here for nine hours now. All the change has fallen out of my pockets, my face is redder than Marks bum after one of Jags’ spanking sessions, and the worst thing is, no-one ever passes this way and WBB doesn’t check her traps until Saturday morning!! In fact, I hope she doesn’t cop on Friday night or it could be Sunday before she needs fresh meat!!!! :? :? :? :? :?
FFS !! Why did it have to happen in the most isolated place in the site???
:x :x :x :x :x :xHelp!!
Help!!
Help!!!!!!!!
:D :D :D 
